NXT RETRO WORKRATE REPORT – February 27, 2013
(by PHIL RIPPA)
We are wasting no time in having the Justin Gabriel/Leo Kruger matchup teased last week. WHEN SOUTH AFRICANS COLLIDE!!!! I have no issues with Gabriel… well at least with his wrestling. I still have a problem with his stupid hair and tiny pants. Kruger is easy to dig so this should be enjoyable. Early on it is entirely headlock based but both guys make sure to do subtle little things instead of just laying around killing time so it isn’t tedious. Then when Kruger spends the 2nd part of the match bending Gabriel’s arm in various ways, it works because Gabriel actually sells being in a submission hold as opposed to wondering what he is going to grab off the catering table. In addition, the match has a nice couple of final minutes. Could have done trimming a few minutes off the match (maybe give each guy a backstage interview or something) so they didn’t have to work headlocks so long. And it could have definitely used less shots of Tyson Kidd.
William Regal – Color Commentator. I loved it when Regal talked about how stupid it was to drop down to the mat after whipping a guy into the ropes.
YES! AN EMMA MATCH!!! I don’t know why I am so excited about this but I am. God, the full Emma entrance is impossible to not love (especially now that I understand it). HA! This is the match that the GIF (which was the very first time I had ever seen Emma’s horrific dancing gimmick) came from. She is wrestling Aksana so the masturbating is fast and furious. From the crowd not me. Bastards. Anyway – remember that period when Fit Finlay was running the WWE women’s division and the matches were fucking awesome. Well we are basically in the NXT Golden Age with the Sarah Del Ray lead women’s division. They are doing things a 1000 times better and more entertaining than the majority of the men’s matches. They really need to do a women’s spinoff hour – so easy to fill.
WHOO-HOO!!!! The Shield jump Corey Graves and Conor O’Brian to end my misery. (Keeping reading for everything else involving this match.) The crowd explodes and spends the rest of the episode chanting for The Shield. Yay for small miracles! BELIEVE IN THE SHIELD~!
NXT decided to start off this week with the ultimate challenge for me. Can Dusty Rhodes talk enough to make up for an opening segment that also involves Bo Dallas and Corey Graves? The answer is… No.
Tony Dawson – Play by Play. This week’s idiocy is that if you throw kicks, it is a sign you are a high flyer. Oh and not knowing what a lariat was. Or calling the 450 Splash a “sunset flip”. God and that was all in the first match.
Crap – The Call ads are starting with this show. DAVID OTUNGA! BOX OFFICE DRAW!!!
Bo Dallas gets jumped in the back. He is on the ground unconscious next to a wall and one NXT officially asks the crack medical team “What do you think it is?” and the doctor answers “I don’t know.” HOW ABOUT HE GOT FUCKING RUN INTO A WALL!!!! Did they hire everyone who used to work for the Mets?
Man – I don’t think there has ever been a WWE merchandise commercial that made me think “Ya know… maybe I should check out the Shop”. At least these guys at the door spots don’t give me a seizure.
The triple threat #1 contender match appears to be just Corey Graves vs. Conor O’Brian thanks to Dallas’ backstage incident. But we have all watched wrestling enough to know it won’t stay that way. Of course – it is also Graves, O’Brian and Dallas. So much hate and so many shitty tattoos. Plus, 15 minutes are left in the show. Why are you doing this to me NXT? Is it because I know I am about to get Regal/Hero? Crowd has no fucking clue how to react to the heel vs. heel matchup so that’s awkward too. Not as awkward has having O’Brian doing the selling. Or O’Brian deciding the body part he was going to work over was Graves’ ass.