NXT RETRO WORKRATE REPORT – February 20, 2013
(by PHIL RIPPA)
Tatsu being a jobber in NXT shouldn’t make me laugh as much as it does. This week he is crushed by Bray Wyatt. Wyatt also wears an apron down to the ring. This was 60 seconds of fun. I am a simple man.
Wyatt also breaks down the rest of the family for not winning the tag titles and then builds them back up by having them beat the shit out of each other. He should be expecting a call from Rutgers any minute now.
William Regal – Color Commentator. With added Regal mocking the ever changing play by play guys he has to deal with.
HEY! It’s Ricardo Rodriguez wrestling as El Local. I will again point out how silly it is to have him stick a mask on but not cover his easily recognizable tattoos. Anyway – he wrestles Xavier Woods and it is perfectly fine (though it did fill the chinlock quota of this show in less than five minutes). The highlight is more the various ways Regal and Phillips find to call Rodriguez fat. God – he really would have been great in WAR.
My beloved Big E Langston is taking on Conor O’Brian. Since they have brought up about a 1000 times that this is a non-title match, I think we all know how this is going to end. I sorta feel bad for everyone on the roster not named Paige – as the reaction Langston is so incredibly different than any one else (again not named Paige) that all his matches feel special. This is just two heavyweights throwing bombs at each other. I am no fan of O’Brian but he does nothing to infuriate me. The fact that Langston’s neck is so huge O’Brian legit couldn’t lock in a full nelson is pretty fantastic. Aww… them going with the Double DQ finish now is just dumb. If you are doing non-title – O’Brian gets the win, sets up the title match THEN you do the Double DQ to draw out the feud. Instead – we get Corey Graves running out to steal the title belt from Langston. Lord – I hate Graves and his punchable face. However – Langston punching Graves in his very punchable face kinda has me excited.
Hey! Tom Phillips is back. I mean he is better than Tony Dawson but that is a very low bar to clear.
So Sasha Banks secret admirer turns out to be Audrey Marie and she is able to drop Banks with a single slap to the back of the head. And then less than 10 minutes later they are having a match because fuck waiting. It’s a good thing both of them can get into their gear so quickly. Shit! I SEE SASHA’S RIBS!!! CLEARLY SHE HAS AN EATING DISORDER TOO!!! Anyway – the premise is that Audrey Marie is back from injury and thinks Sasha Banks took her spot. Of course – as Regal points out – this is the same reason Paige and Summer Rae are feuding. Oh and Sasha gets zero offense in so ya know… it’s great that they gave her those couple of wins a few weeks ago.
No wonder all the folks in NXT keep getting long term injuries – their doctor looks like he would be more qualified to sell you new windows than diagnose a separated shoulder.
Crap – there is Tony Dawson. He has an in ring interview with Tyson Kidd. What you would expect to happen in wrestling when you have a guy in ring in crutches happens. Leo Kruger comes down and threatens to beat Kidd up until Justin Gabriel makes the save. So while that can be fun when, I assume, it takes place next week – this was a waste of time that could have been better filled with a match or a recap of almost anything else or maybe an Emma dance montage.