Dynamite - 8/3/2022

[Technico Support]

What about the dreaded Father Nelson?

(apologies for the poor video quality)

[HarryArchieGus]

22 minutes ago, twiztor said:

not sure how i feel about Excalibur kicking off the show without Brodie Lee's "it's Wednesday, you know what that means". had to happen sooner or later, i suppose.

I may be alone, but I find it refreshing not to hear that phrase. I only knew Brodie Lee from the AEW run, but I loved it and loved him dearly. I hope and suspect they'll find ways to continue to pay tribute to him, but doing away with the catchphrase, bad Dark Order tribute segments and the Dark Order in general would all be welcomed over here. 

[J.T.]

35 minutes ago, twiztor said:

not sure how i feel about Excalibur kicking off the show without Brodie Lee's "it's Wednesday, you know what that means". had to happen sooner or later, i suppose.

Stu Grayson and Alan Angels have both been released and Anna Jay has turned heel and joined Jericho's faction.  The Dark Order is slowly being phased out.

[Curt McGirt]

The London Dungeon at first made me think of a seated Crossface Chickenwing. I guess that would work too. 

Really what someone should use is an old fashioned fuckin' RINGS OF SATURN. 

[Craig H]

1 hour ago, Technico Support said:

If you smell shit everywhere you go, check your own shoes

That should be a Raylan-ism, ie you meet an asshole in the morning, you met an asshole. You meet assholes all day, you're the asshole.

[Craig H]

1 hour ago, Technico Support said:

If you smell shit everywhere you go, check your own shoes

That should be a Raylan-ism, ie you meet an asshole in the morning, you met an asshole. You meet assholes all day, you're the asshole.

[porksweats]

13 minutes ago, Curt McGirt said:

The London Dungeon at first made me think of a seated Crossface Chickenwing. I guess that would work too. 

Really what someone should use is an old fashioned fuckin' RINGS OF SATURN. 

Julia Hart been using one if I'm not mistaken 

[Technico Support]

3 minutes ago, Craig H said:

That should be a Raylan-ism, ie you meet an asshole in the morning, you met an asshole. You meet assholes all day, you're the asshole.

Yep, same meaning!  Some days I like one, some days I like the other

[Curt McGirt]

1 hour ago, porksweats said:

Julia Hart been using one if I'm not mistaken 

See I thought there had been someone using one on the shows, but couldn't remember at all. Thought maybe it was a variation too. In any case, makes me happy. 

[Dog]

24 minutes ago, Curt McGirt said:

Really what someone should use is an old fashioned fuckin' RINGS OF SATURN. 

PAC calls it the Brutalizer. Used it to finish people after the Black Arrow for awhile, before rightly realizing that was anticlimactic.

[Curt McGirt]

*slaps forehead* Of course

[Tarheel Moneghetti]

1 hour ago, J.T. said:

Stu Grayson and Alan Angels have both been released and Anna Jay has turned heel and joined Jericho's faction.  The Dark Order is slowly being phased out.

Instead of simply releasing DO members, they should have had Angels and Grayson film vignettes where they are deprogrammed and go back to their normal lives.

it’s supposed to be a cult, people.  

Edited August 4, 2022 by Tarheel Moneghetti

[DEAN]

THURSDAY REFLECTIONS:  I just noticed that Sanjay Dutt is dressed exactly like Platinum Satnum, like Satnum's mini-me.  Satnum should DEFINITELY shave his head.  The reason Orange Cassidy is so 1970s in approach is because of his gimmick mostly, he really takes his time.  What's the saying, "If you think you are going too slow, slow down."  He really let's the crowd take in what's happening and THUS they can comprehend and get into the story he is telling.  His story is usually, "I am the cool fuck up you hung out with in high school and a jock is beating my ass."  Nobody is more Jock-like than Jay Lethal.  Actually, Jay Lethal assumes the role of asshole gym teacher who has had enough of Cassidy's shit and wants to settle it man to man.  "First you didn't go out for the football team and now you're smoking between classes!"  I love Lethal letting the moment where Cassidy can't stand up to hit the Orange Punch ferment and let the crowd get all of it's sympathy for Cassidy out of their system.  Actually, Jay Lethal is a drill instructor and Cassidy is the upstart raw recruit... I'll stop.  Wardlow is Adam Baldwin is My Bodyguard and Orange Cassidy is Christopher Makepeace.  Wardlow will show Cassidy the motorcycle he's working on.  Okay, NOW I'll stop.  Cassidy could never match Makepeace's awesome hair.  Adam Cole is great being pissed off that the Young Bucks are INEVITABLY joining Hangman Page and going ahead and getting them together.  Oh those are butterflies on his pants.  I thought they were lots of holes.  I don't know what's worse.  Or maybe greater.  Mox does his infamous Make The Hart Dungeon Look Like A Daycare promo.  They follow that up with the GREAT Jungle Boy tries to vehicularly manslaughter Christian and Tony!  Christian is so fucking great in that.  "Christian, we're going to need you to act surprised!"  "Gotcha."  Britt Baker needs a fur coat too.  They can come to the ring as a team channeling Bette Davis from the Letter.  I love that Baker and Thunder Rosa are the two that are WAAAY over but they have hitched their wagons to two of the best workers in the world.  Hayter is soooo lucky that Toni Storm hated the WWE.  Britt Baker is sooooooo lucky that Toni Storm hated the WWE.  Oh man, that Hayter punch to the face I've watched 400 times in GIF form and now twice while watching the match and it is STILL fucking awesome.  While YOU RUBES were watching in picture in picture, Baker and Hayter were sooooo fucking awesome beating a wad of heat on Thunder Rosa.  They are Leilani Kai and Judy Martin in All Japan Women in 1987.  Britt Baker holds up her end and actually is better than Hayter at getting the crowd behind Thunder by taunting the marks while beating her ass.  Rosa is really good at being a sympathetic babyface and takes a real beating in this match to get the crowd to get into her comeback.  Hayter got over EXACTLY when she double suplexes Storm and Rosa.  Baker is fucking great in this match, too.  I love her toprope Air Raid Crash.  She is also a HEAT MACHINE when she and Rosa face off and start slapping each other upside the head.  Baker takes Storm's Flying Hip Attack like a total CHAMP.  Hayter taunting Storm right after the pinfall is so fucking good.  They need to trade the belts between the four of these.  Jamie Hayter is fucking great but Toni Storm is the anchor of the division.  She allows everybody she wrestles to hit their peak potential- especially Hayter and Baker.  We REALLY need to see Storm versus Kris Statlander.   But yeah, this match pretty much proved that AEW needs a women's tag title- especially if you've got a GREAT fucking heel team like Baker and Hayter.  It would just be great match after great match.  I wasn't watching WWE when Matt Hardy and Christian Cage wrestled 182 times so I dig this.  This match is very old school psychologically and very deep.  Matt Hardy is our babyface.  Christian beats on him and Hardy makes a comeback.  Hardy beats on Cage until he cuts off his own comeback by missing an elbow through a table.  Cage drags Hardy into the ring and hits the Killswitch and wins.  That was a good, solid match by two guys who are pretty old- one of whom is pretty physically limited, wrestling a low impact, story-heavy match.  It was a good match to follow a stiff, high-impact women's match.  Ethan Page is fun because he is back to being a dad of teenage boys- the teenage boys being the wrestling audience.  Replace his bitching about other wrestlers with the audience not mowing the grass and not thanking your mother for dinner.  Then the audience DOESN'T CLEAN THEIR FUCKING ROOM AFTER I'VE TOLD YOU A THOUSAND TIMES THAT I WANT THIS FUCKING ROOM CLEAN BY THE TIME I GET HOME FROM WORK!  I was hoping Ethan Page would keep it up and maybe transition to Father of Teenage Daughters again like when he was yelling at Tay Conti.   The Dumpster match answered a few questions I had about the Ass Boys.  I knew they were totally fucking great at selling an assbeating.  Do they have enough offense to be able to beat some heat on a babyface team?  Sure.  Especially Colton, though he needs to work on his punches.  Austin Gunn is great at getting the crowd riled up by being COMPLETELY AWESOME.  Anthony Bowens is the Jamie Hayter of the Acclaimed.  Max Caster would be your Britt Baker.  Bowens is your Wrestling Machine.  Caster is good.  Caster does do the crazy ass elbow drop through a table.  That was more fun than good but it was a good breakout match for both teams.  The main event makes me think about comparing AEW to 1990's All Japan.  Bryan Danielson is Misawa.  Mox is Kawada.  Hangman Page is Kobashi.  Adam Cole is Akira Taue.  Chris Jericho is Jumbo Tsuruta.  Kenny Omega is Stan Hanson.  Wheeler Yuta is Jun Akiyama.  Daniel Garcia is Doctor Death Steve Williams.  Fuego Del Sol is Kikuchi.  So I don't know if Wheeler Akiyama is ever going to get the big win over Jumbo Jericho but Wheeler has twenty more years to get big wins.  This match is pretty fucking great if you look at it through that filter.

[Curt McGirt]

Oh man now THAT was a DEAN review. 

My Bodyguard - Wikipedia

[Dog]

I love to see Dean's thoughts, but I 100% cannot read a wall of text in 2022.

[Technico Support]

41 minutes ago, Dog said:

I love to see Dean's thoughts, but I 100% cannot read a wall of text in 2022.

Same!  Dean, I love you, but please use paragraph breaks once in a while.  I actually switched to bullet points on my 80s/90s WWF thread.  I love me some bullet points.

Edited August 4, 2022 by Technico Support

[Log]

Ethan Page is a dude that I feel like is right there on the cusp of being someone I'm really into. I've seen a ton of his work that I really enjoyed (especially against Darby!), but he's just got a little something missing that he needs to put him over the top. I have no clue what that is.

I used to feel the same about Ricky Starks, but he seems to have found that thing.

[HarryArchieGus]

@DEANdon't change a goddamn thing. 

For the attention impaired, here's some of the glory you're sadly missing...

1 hour ago, DEAN said:

Ethan Page is fun because he is back to being a dad of teenage boys- the teenage boys being the wrestling audience.  Replace his bitching about other wrestlers with the audience not mowing the grass and not thanking your mother for dinner.  Then the audience DOESN'T CLEAN THEIR FUCKING ROOM AFTER I'VE TOLD YOU A THOUSAND TIMES THAT I WANT THIS FUCKING ROOM CLEAN BY THE TIME I GET HOME FROM WORK!  I was hoping Ethan Page would keep it up and maybe transition to Father of Teenage Daughters again like when he was yelling at Tay Conti.   

 

[Log]

Asking Dean to not have a wall of text is like asking Picasso to paint people "normal looking".

[just drew]

I’ve watched the first three minutes of that Dumpster match probably 8 times, and I maintain it’s one of the best booked segments in AEW history. The Acclaimed taking out Paterfamilias de Hindquarters before the match. Anthony Bowens screaming “eat shit!” At Austin Ass while braining him with a rubbish bin. The sell job Austin Ass did of said braining. Max rapping to the Ass Boys faces about how shitty they are. Perfect. Just perfect. Idk why, but whenever you read my posts about shitty adam Cole and think “does this guy like anything?” Think about this post. I loved every little bit of this.

[Tarheel Moneghetti]

I have a theory that, at the bottom of his reviews, Dean either confesses to terrible crimes or drops hints about where he buried the treasure.

Sadly, the walls of text are dense and impenetrable and I will never be able to test this theory.  

Edited August 4, 2022 by Tarheel Moneghetti

[DEAN]

I don't know what's more adorable- Mei Suruga singing along to Adam Cole's entrance or Mei Suruga responding to JR's entrance.

 

[Pete]

2 hours ago, Curt McGirt said:

Oh man now THAT was a DEAN review. 

My Bodyguard - Wikipedia

One of the first movies I ever saw in a theater. I'M NOT OLD @DEAN, YOU'RE OLD! Head for Denny's, I think the Early Bird ends at 4!

[DEAN]

3 hours ago, DEAN said:

THURSDAY REFLECTIONS:  I just noticed that Sanjay Dutt is dressed exactly like Platinum Satnum, like Satnum's mini-me.  Satnum should DEFINITELY shave his head.  The reason Orange Cassidy is so 1970s in approach is because of his gimmick mostly, he really takes his time.  What's the saying, "If you think you are going too slow, slow down."  He really let's the crowd take in what's happening and THUS they can comprehend and get into the story he is telling.  His story is usually, "I am the cool fuck up you hung out with in high school and a jock is beating my ass."  Nobody is more Jock-like than Jay Lethal.  Actually, Jay Lethal assumes the role of asshole gym teacher who has had enough of Cassidy's shit and wants to settle it man to man.  "First you didn't go out for the football team and now you're smoking between classes!"  I love Lethal letting the moment where Cassidy can't stand up to hit the Orange Punch ferment and let the crowd get all of it's sympathy for Cassidy out of their system.  Actually, Jay Lethal is a drill instructor and Cassidy is the upstart raw recruit... I'll stop.  Wardlow is Adam Baldwin is My Bodyguard and Orange Cassidy is Christopher Makepeace.  Wardlow will show Cassidy the motorcycle he's working on.  Okay, NOW I'll stop.  Cassidy could never match Makepeace's awesome hair. 

Adam Cole is great being pissed off that the Young Bucks are INEVITABLY joining Hangman Page and going ahead and getting them together.  Oh those are butterflies on his pants.  I thought they were lots of holes.  I don't know what's worse.  Or maybe greater. 

Mox does his infamous Make The Hart Dungeon Look Like A Daycare promo. 

They follow that up with the GREAT Jungle Boy tries to vehicularly manslaughter Christian and Tony!  Christian is so fucking great in that.  "Christian, we're going to need you to act surprised!"  "Gotcha." 

Britt Baker needs a fur coat too.  They can come to the ring as a team channeling Bette Davis from the Letter.  I love that Baker and Thunder Rosa are the two that are WAAAY over but they have hitched their wagons to two of the best workers in the world.  Hayter is soooo lucky that Toni Storm hated the WWE.  Britt Baker is sooooooo lucky that Toni Storm hated the WWE.  Oh man, that Hayter punch to the face I've watched 400 times in GIF form and now twice while watching the match and it is STILL fucking awesome.  While YOU RUBES were watching in picture in picture, Baker and Hayter were sooooo fucking awesome beating a wad of heat on Thunder Rosa.  They are Leilani Kai and Judy Martin in All Japan Women in 1987.  Britt Baker holds up her end and actually is better than Hayter at getting the crowd behind Thunder by taunting the marks while beating her ass.  Rosa is really good at being a sympathetic babyface and takes a real beating in this match to get the crowd to get into her comeback.  Hayter got over EXACTLY when she double suplexes Storm and Rosa.  Baker is fucking great in this match, too.  I love her toprope Air Raid Crash.  She is also a HEAT MACHINE when she and Rosa face off and start slapping each other upside the head.  Baker takes Storm's Flying Hip Attack like a total CHAMP.  Hayter taunting Storm right after the pinfall is so fucking good.  They need to trade the belts between the four of these.  Jamie Hayter is fucking great but Toni Storm is the anchor of the division.  She allows everybody she wrestles to hit their peak potential- especially Hayter and Baker.  We REALLY need to see Storm versus Kris Statlander.   But yeah, this match pretty much proved that AEW needs a women's tag title- especially if you've got a GREAT fucking heel team like Baker and Hayter.  It would just be great match after great match.

  I wasn't watching WWE when Matt Hardy and Christian Cage wrestled 182 times so I dig this.  This match is very old school psychologically and very deep.  Matt Hardy is our babyface.  Christian beats on him and Hardy makes a comeback.  Hardy beats on Cage until he cuts off his own comeback by missing an elbow through a table.  Cage drags Hardy into the ring and hits the Killswitch and wins.  That was a good, solid match by two guys who are pretty old- one of whom is pretty physically limited, wrestling a low impact, story-heavy match.  It was a good match to follow a stiff, high-impact women's match. 

Ethan Page is fun because he is back to being a dad of teenage boys- the teenage boys being the wrestling audience.  Replace his bitching about other wrestlers with the audience not mowing the grass and not thanking your mother for dinner.  Then the audience DOESN'T CLEAN THEIR FUCKING ROOM AFTER I'VE TOLD YOU A THOUSAND TIMES THAT I WANT THIS FUCKING ROOM CLEAN BY THE TIME I GET HOME FROM WORK!  I was hoping Ethan Page would keep it up and maybe transition to Father of Teenage Daughters again like when he was yelling at Tay Conti. 

 The Dumpster match answered a few questions I had about the Ass Boys.  I knew they were totally fucking great at selling an assbeating.  Do they have enough offense to be able to beat some heat on a babyface team?  Sure.  Especially Colton, though he needs to work on his punches.  Austin Gunn is great at getting the crowd riled up by being COMPLETELY AWESOME.  Anthony Bowens is the Jamie Hayter of the Acclaimed.  Max Caster would be your Britt Baker.  Bowens is your Wrestling Machine.  Caster is good.  Caster does do the crazy ass elbow drop through a table.  That was more fun than good but it was a good breakout match for both teams. 

The main event makes me think about comparing AEW to 1990's All Japan.  Bryan Danielson is Misawa.  Mox is Kawada.  Hangman Page is Kobashi.  Adam Cole is Akira Taue.  Chris Jericho is Jumbo Tsuruta.  Kenny Omega is Stan Hanson.  Wheeler Yuta is Jun Akiyama.  Daniel Garcia is Doctor Death Steve Williams.  Fuego Del Sol is Kikuchi.  So I don't know if Wheeler Akiyama is ever going to get the big win over Jumbo Jericho but Wheeler has twenty more years to get big wins.  This match is pretty fucking great if you look at it through that filter.

Here you go, you big babies.

[Infinit]

Has anyone mentioned yet that John Cena's last IG post is a picture of Platinum Max Caster?

WILD.