Jump to content
DVDVR Message Board

Technico Support's 80's/90s WWF nostaligia tour


Technico Support

Recommended Posts

Wrestlemania 5, the ultimate viewing endurance test, rolls on.  Sweet Jesus.

Dino Bravo vs Ron Garvin

  • FUCK, dudes, Dino Bravo is massive.  His home is definitely filled with PEDs and black market smokes.
  • Speaking of criminals, Jimmy Snuka is introduced and he greets the crowd because he's making a comeback.  He resists the urge to murder 2-3 women on the way to the ring.  Jimmy is only in his mid-40s here but looks probably 10 years older.  The wrestling life, drugs, and murder will do that to a guy.
  • I guess they're running low on time on this Bataan Death March of a PPV because there's no shine, just Bravo jumping Ron at the bell as they immediately go to the heat.  Hey guys, how about doing better matches instead of filling your PPV with lower midcard dudes working each other in meaningless, short matches that nobody wants to see?  I know, I know, it was a different time and two name guys just wrestling each other instead of jobbers was a big deal.
  • Garvin makes a bit of a comeback.  Guys under 300 pounds should never do big splashes.  It just looks weird.
  • Not a bad match, just nothing to it, like most of the bouts on this show.
  • Bravo cuts off a Garvin 10 punch in the corner with an inverted atomic drop, then hits the side slam for the win. 
  • Garvin gloms Dino from behind like the Quebec mob did, then stomps out Frenchy for good measure to defend the good ol' US of A as we're supposed to forget Ron is from Montreal, too.
  • Speaking of which, is Ron Garvin being Jimmy Garvin's IRL stepdad but gimmick brother the weirdest wrestling family thing?

Brainbusters vs Strike Force

  • Fuck yes Tully and Arn out there doing Tully and Arn things.  This is a match they could do in their sleep.  I swear Arn whispered, "just pretend they're Punky and Hoot and go with it."
  • Martel is back from [IRL wife's illness] [kayfabe back injury] and looking jacked as fuck, like there's a singles push in his future.
  • The shine is wayyyy too short for my tastes as these are four great tag team guys I wish would have had more time.  Instead, Tito accidentally hits Martel, who then leaves his partner high and dry.  The Brainbusters seem to beat on Tito two on one much longer than any other segment in the match, ending with a sweet spike piledriver. 
  • Good match while the good stuff lasted before giving way to all storyline.  Another short waste of all talent involved on a card full of that.

Hogan cuts a promo about worrying about the support infrastructure of Trump Tower and, knowing what I know now about the way he paid his contractors, I'd worry, too.  Donald is furiously yelling into his massive 80s cell phone trying to add "Mega Powers Exploding" coverage so he can con the insurance company.

Jake vs Andre

  • Holy fuck this is bad.  Again, heel attacks babyface to skip right to the heat.  BUT they somehow still give this about 10 minutes.
  • I won't lie, I FFWD'd through a big chunk of this as it was just Andre slowly, clumsily beating on Jake. 
  • DiBiase steals Damian and has a really hard time running with the bag.  I LOL.  Jake chases him down, takes the bag back and DiBiase just kind of stands there.  I guess they were setting something up for the house shows but it was so awkward.  Meanwhile, Andre attacks Studd for the DQ and Jake runs him off with the snake.  Awful.
  • It was a little tough to watch the "Andre/Studd arguing" interactions knowing what an awful person Andre was to Studd, which led him to quit during his first run.
  • I mentioned it after the Rumble, but what a weird second run for Studd.  Back in December.  Wins the Rumble.  No match at Mania, just a ref spot.  Quits in June.

Five matches left, guys!  We can do it!  Fuck.

Edited by Technico Support
  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 9/1/2022 at 5:48 PM, JLowe said:

For sure! But I think we're going to look back and realize it was the rise of no-smoking policies everywhere that made a huge difference. Second would be  awareness of skin cancer/using sunscreen

WELL THANK GOODNESS VINCE TOOK WRESTLING OUT OF THE SMOKE FILLED ARENAS THEN!!!

  • Thanks 1
  • Haha 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Continuing Wrestlemania 5!

The Hart Foundation vs The Proto Rhythm and Blues

  • So just to get timelines straight, HTM & Valentine teamed here just as a makeshift team to further the Jimmy vs Harts feud.  Then they split up to work with Snuka (HTM) and Garvin (Valentine).  THEN late in the year, reunited as Rhythm and Blues.  Whew.
  • Bret has switched from Ray Bans to mylar shades.
  • Really good sub-eight-minute match.  Bret, Honky, and Valentine (in that descending order) are great at what they do, and don't sleep on Neidhart as a perfectly good powerhouse and hot tag.
  • Honky out here selling atomic drops like he and Rude made a bet backstage.
  • I know I say it every time, but god dammit everything Bret does is so fucking smooth. 
  • Finish is really out of nowhere.  Anvil chases Jimmy on the outside.  Jimmy leaves his megaphone on the apron.  HTM goes for it but Anvil throws it to Bret, who gloms Honky with it for the win.  Really unexpected and abrupt.  Still, excellent match with some real top-notch pros out there showing what you can still do with limited time.  I recommend it.

Ultimate Warrior (c) vs Rick Rude

  • First, they show a recap of the posedown from the Royal Rumble (which I FFWD'd in my Rumble viewing), where Rude attacked Warrior and then Warrior lost his shit on the refs & agents.  I'm astounded by how careless Warrior is with the agents in the ring (including Nick Bockwinkel who must be thrilled to have to sell for this choad).  He's really throwing dudes with little concern for their safety.  A harbinger of things to come.
  • FUUUUUUUCK.  Is there anyone in wrestling who achieved greater heights with so little in-ring skill than Warrior?  I didn't remember him being this terrible so maybe he gets better?  He's so bad here.  So bad.
  • The entire babyface shine is just lazy, Muraco-style turnbuckle whips and bear hugs.  Warrior gets on offense, whips Rude from one corner, to the other, back again, and back again, like 4-5 times.  Then he bearhugs him.  WUT.  It's crazy:  Rude cuts him off briefly, but then Warrior gets back on offense...only to go to another bearhug.  Fuck me.
  • God bless Rick Rude.  He's just bumping, selling, and stooging his ass off in a yeoman's effort to make this watchable.  He was so fucking good.  I legit LOL'd when, after having his back worked over, he tried for a hip swivel and sold not being able to do it because of the beating.  What a god damn showman.  Rest in peace.  I hope he's in the afterlife telling those fat, out of shape, Valhalla sweathogs to keep the noise down so he can show the seraphim what a real man looks like.
  • I swore, even back then, that Rude's airbrushed cartoon Warrior design on his tights was from an issue of Mad Magazine.  I know I remember seeing that.
  • Warrior is so fucking careless, clumsy, and downright WEAK it's shameful.  In one scary spot, he picks up Rude for a backbreaker and hits it.  Then he tries to do another one, almost drops Rude (who grabs Warrior and physically lifts himself back up to save himself), then stumbles all the way across the ring into the ropes while barely holding Rude.  That could have been bad.  Those muscles were definitely for show, not for go.  This shit legit had me Googling why bodybuilders aren't strong.
  • Match ends when Warrior tries to suplex Rude back into the ring, Heenan hangs onto his leg, and Rude "falls on top of Warrior" for the pin.  In reality, Warrior lost control of Rude AGAIN and shoot brain bustered the guy.  FUCK.  Rude was so lucky not to be injured there.
  • Rude runs off with the belt while weak-ass Warrior struggles to press slam Heenan, though Heenan is fully cooperating, then drops Bobby all cattywompus and out of control, causing him to land right on his shoulder instead.
  • Trump, at ringside, would go on to emulate Warrior's political views and eloquent promo style.
  • Terrible match by a guy who had no business in the ring, except the size queen in charge is desperate for another sexy muscle boy to replace the current aging muscle boy.

I need to shout out Jesse and GAH-RELLA (As Jesse says it) again here.  They're so good on commentary, as somewhere in here they playfully snipe each other over their advanced age for like the 14th time on the show. 

Three matches to go!  Lucky for my sanity, the last two undercard matches barely pass four minutes combined.  Maybe I can knock it all out tonight.

Edited by Technico Support
  • Like 6
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have to watch that match again. The subsequent PPV rematches were good and Warrior wasn't noticeably shitty to me, though of course Rude does the bulk of the work bumping, selling, and heeling in them both.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Finally finishing Wrestlemania 5!

Duggan vs Bad News

  • Nothing much to say about this at all.  It's a sub four minute clubbering sprint in the death spot (fuck, damn near the whole show is the death spot).
  • On a show where a Bushwacker grabbed a Rougeau's dick, almost as homoerotic is Bad News reaching deep into Duggan's tights to grab his waistband so he could, I guess, get some leverage for his gut punches?  It looked like he was fishing around for Hacksaw's 1x2.
  • Finish comes when Bad News goes for the never before seen RUNNING ENZUGIRI.  WTF??????  Duggan ducks and hits a three point stance clothesline.  Brown rolls out of the ring and no sells the whole deal, grabbing a chair to engage in a chair vs 2x4 duel to a double DQ. 

Red Rooster vs Bobby Heenan

  • Taylor has fullly bought into the gimmick, styling his hair with red spikes, bobbing his head like a rooster, and doing the cockadoodledoo.  It's awful.
  • Heenan comes to the ring with The Brooklyn Brawler is and selling, or most likely legit suffering from, a shoulder injury from his earlier run-in with the Warrior where good ol' UW dropped him with less care than you'd exhibit for a bag of mulch.
  • Match goes 31 seconds and ends with Heenan missing a corner charge (awesome bump off that!) and Taylor immediately getting the pin.
  • Brawler and Taylor fight after the bell to setup a house show program that no doubt set the world on fire.
  • Talylor went on to do just about nothing after getting this amazing gimmick and left the company less than a year later.  What's really crazy is that he had two WWF runs and two WCW runs between 1988 and 1994.  So four separate runs in two companies in the span of six years.  Wrestling needs more guys just jumping back and forth like crazy and fewer non-competes.

The Mega Powers EXPLODE

  • LOOOOL of course Randy enters first!
  • Savage is sporting a whole-ass BANDAGE on his arm.  Google tells me it was a bursa sac infection that he refused to get proper treatment for because he had to make this match.  I'm seriously surprised Hogan didn't inflate the legend of this as follows:
    • Step 1: Randy had a nasty infection but left the hospital because he had to make the match with the Hulkster, dude.
    • Step 2: Randy had no control of his arm and the Hulkster had to carry the match, brother.  Meltzer gave it 16 stars.
    • Step 3: Randy had his arm amputated before the match, jack, I tore every muscle in my glutes carrying him, and we still went out there an worked a 55 minute near broadway.  Meltzer gave it 56 stars.
    • Step 4: Randy died shortly after the match, brother.  RIP, Macho.  -HH
  • Good enough match for what it was.  Meltzer actually gave it 2.75, which sounds right.  I stumbled upon a Reddit discussion of this one (I accidentally Googled "reddt wrestlemania 5" instead of "wikipedia wrestlemania 5") where someone said it was 2.75 as a standalone match but, as part of a story, felt more like 3+, which sounds right as well.
  • Hogan no-sells the flying elbow, Hulks up, and wins it.  This was the first time I recall seeing Hogan do that.  Yes, he always hulked up and won, but this was the first time he'd specifically kill a guy's finish first.  I guess they wanted something big for Mania and for this story.  It went on to become a standard thing, though, which kinda sucks.
  • Regarding Savage's title reign: it was kinda lame.  I don't know if Vince booked to soothe Hogan's insecurities, or to hedge against Savage becoming too popular when he knew Hogan was getting it back and, thus, needed to still be seen as the top guy, or both, but Savage was booked as a second banana his whole reign.  He never ever felt like the top guy in the company.  Hogan helped him win the belt at Mania 4, fought his battle for him at SummerSlam (with both guys wearing Hogan gear!), saved his ass at Survivor Series, and threw him out of the Rumble.  I loved the angle of Savage losing his mind over jealousy and blowing up his friendship, but what if the angle had instead been "I'm the fucking champion and you've been stealing my spotlight for a year!"  Of course, that would have made Hogan the heel.  ?  It didn't matter in the end, as this was a legendary story and made money, but man, this reign little brothered Savage and made him less consequential while he was supposed to be the champion of the world.

Okay guys, Summerslam 89 is next!  Thanks again for reading.

Edited by Technico Support
  • Like 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 9/11/2022 at 8:07 AM, zendragon said:

WELL THANK GOODNESS VINCE TOOK WRESTLING OUT OF THE SMOKE FILLED ARENAS THEN!!!

My first show was at the old Kiel Auditorium in '86. It was a Sam Muchnick memorial tournament and then Hogan/Orndorff as the main. The place was smokey as hell and people were throwing full cups of beer at the ring. It was incredible. Let's go BACK to the smoke filled arenas!

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

My first show was a WWF card in January of 86 in Baltimore.  4 jobber matches, Hogan vs Beefcake for the title, then 2 JTTS matches.  No idea how I am still a fan today after such an inauspicious start.  I don't recall people smoking in the arena but it was a time where my parents, etc. all smoked in grocery stores and theaters, so I'm sure there was plenty of smoking happening at the ol' Civic Center.

Years later, I attended a monster truck rally in the same building and there was a big announcement that there was no smoking allowed and I was like, "this whole deal is the equivalent of being locked in a garage with the car running, what does it matter?"

Edited by Technico Support
  • Like 2
  • Haha 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

15 hours ago, Log said:

My first show was at the old Kiel Auditorium in '86. It was a Sam Muchnick memorial tournament and then Hogan/Orndorff as the main. The place was smokey as hell and people were throwing full cups of beer at the ring. It was incredible. Let's go BACK to the smoke filled arenas!

 YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO DRINK THE BEER AND THROW THE CUP!! WHAT THE HELL!

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Before I get into Summerslam 89, I need to mention that I forgot to call out Hogan pulling out a headlock-->headlock-->drop toe hold-->grounded front facelock combo in the Savage match at Mania.  I maybe have pooped my pants a little in disbelief.

Now it's time for SUMMERSLAAAAAAAM.  FEEEEEL THE HEEEAAAAT.

Tony Schiavone is on commentary duty tonight with Jesse and I need to say, two matches in, they're pretty good!

The Hart Foundation vs The Brainbusters

  • I need to tell you that I try to go into these shows cold.  It works out well because I just turned 48 and can't remember shit from their original airings.  So the Harts came out and I was happy.  But then I saw Tully and Arn and I pumped my fist like a real dork.
  • It's non-title because, as Jesse tells Tony multiple times, this match was signed before Tully and Arn won the belts.  LOGIC~!
  • What a treat.  Two of the top ten tag teams of all time.  It doesn't disappoint in the least.  Honestly, there's nothing I can write here that would convey how good this is.  Just go watch it.
  • Tully and Arn bump, stooge, sell, and do so many cool little things for a looong time to start.  I swear, the shine lasts almost 10 minutes and it's so fucking good.  The whole match just flies because all these guys are just ON.  Even Neidhart was out there working like he knew he was the least of all four and needed to step up.  I can't talk shit about anything here.
  • AND AND AND they strictly adhere to tag rules!  I love it.  Arn tries to tag Tully's foot and Morella his having none of it.  Tully tries to tag Arn, who is standing on the ropes, and Joey is like NOPE.  Bobby is in the corner coaching Arn on using the tag rope.  Fuck yes.  We had an argument here a while back and someone insinuated that tag team wrestling is like playing tag, where you can touch your partner anywhere on the body, while he's standing wherever.  NAY.  I SAY NAY.  I love an AEW/PWG house party tag match fuckfest with five minute double teams but those tags better be by the book.  I am a man of contradictions. 
  • Seriously, look up "tag team mother fucking wrestling" in a dictionary and there's a pic of this match.  I cannot recommend this highly enough.
  • The finish is amazing, too.  Bret is pinning Tully while Morella tries to get Neidhart out of the ring.  Arn comes off the top with an axhandle, rolls Tully out, and then makes the pin while covering his head with his hands and one of Bret's to make sure Morella doesn't see that the illegal man is making the pin.  We cry a collective tear of joy that such beauty exists in the world.
  • A million billion stars and 37 chef's kisses.  If you haven't seen this, go see it.  If you have, go see it again.

Dusty vs Honky Tonk

  • Dusty Rhodes promo.  Holy fucking shit.  Look, I've seen a lot of Dusty's promos, but never one like this.  I expect some slang, a bit of ebonics, but I didn't expect Dusty to take it about 17 steps further, straight into the realm of total racist caricature.  Instead of a cool dude slipping in some choice words for the people, we have a white guy from Texas being an offensive stereotype.  I swear to God Vince was off camera between takes yelling BLACKER, DUSTY!  GOD DAMMIT PAL I WANT BLAAAACKEEERRRRRRRRR.  While Bad News was off camera being restrained by like 30 dudes.  Wrestling things not as racist as this portrayal:
    • Akeem
    • Saba Simba
    • Uhaa running around with a spear
    • Andre in the back of the tour bus
    • Slick eating fried chicken while introducing the video for Jive Soul Bro
  • Shit.  I apologize if me saying all this is uncomfortable, but I was uncomfortable, myself, watching this.  It was offensive and awful.  I applaud their restraint for not just going ahead and putting him in blackface, I guess.
  • The match was fine.  Dusty was fun in-ring despite being past his prime and HTM (my god I don't want to even think about writing "honky" after all that) was game and up for it.
  • Jimmy accidentally gloms HTM with the geetar for the finish.
  • Fun bit afterward where a brain-scrambled HTM legit thinks he's Elvis, talking about meeting up with 'Cilla and Lisa Marie at Graceland.
  • Speaking of Akeem, it's funny that they kept him around for over a year after Dusty's debut.  Then again, Virgil was still around, too.  Vince don't give a fuck.

So that's all for me so far.  I may watch more tonight.  Thanks for reading and I promise the rest of the review won't be so heavy.

 

Edited by Technico Support
  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I had to look up this Dusty promo that I don't remember. On a scale of "Shelton Benjamin's/Butch Reed's gimmick is that he has blond hair, and that's unnatural" to "Sonny Onoo's lawsuit against WCW," I think it's pretty benign. It might be less racist than "The Natural/the Gold Standard," tbh. I just watched a bunch of Kamala squashes in which he was too stupid to understand the concept of pinning someone even after multiple matches, though, so maybe I'm inured. 

Also, the point of Slick eating the fried chicken in "Jive Soul Bro" is to focus on this big-lipped black man munching on fried chicken, but as a kid, I was just like, "man, now I want some fried chicken" every time I saw it. Fuck the racists and the haters, fried chicken is one of our important cultural dishes, we successfully exported it to Japan and South Korea, and I will never apologize for loving it. 

  • Like 2
  • Thanks 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'll need to rewatch it because it's definitely possible that I was just so shocked and taken aback by how badly they flanderized him.  Maybe it was just relative, like they removed all the more subdued parts of his act, how he fought for the blue collar people and all that, and all that was left was this fat white dude who talked jive, and then they turned that up past 11.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 9/9/2022 at 2:50 PM, Technico Support said:

Wrestlemania 5, the ultimate viewing endurance test, rolls on.  Sweet Jesus.

Dino Bravo vs Ron Garvin

  • FUCK, dudes, Dino Bravo is massive.  His home is definitely filled with PEDs and black market smokes.

I remember watching when he came in in '86 he was massive but he wasn't as bloated as he got months later. I remember enjoying his Squash matches on those early WWF Challenge and Superstars episodes he was more mobile. Most of Dino Bravo I seen was his singles run after he was apart of the New Dream Team with Valentine. He and Valentine weren't a good team anyway. I remember thinking Bravo could have atleast had a good run against Hogan very early in his run in WWF before he got ridiculously roided up. I remember thinking about wanting to watch Bravos work in Montreal before he came in.

He's got a reputation for being a terrible worker based off his WWF run

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

SummerSlam 89 continues and I promise this part of the review will have 100% less indignation over possible racist subtext!  Join me, won't you?

Mr. Perfect vs The Red Rooster

  • Watching the slow transformation of Curt Hennig into the Mr. P we all remember has been wild.  Here, he has the Mr. Perfect gear and his government name has been dropped, BUT he has no music or entrance yet.  Taylor gets an entrance, though, as he chicken walks to the ring.  Sweet Jesus.
  • Weird match as Hennig controls with babyface offense (hiplock takeovers and the like) while Taylor is more heelish.  Maybe this was meant to show how the "inexperienced" Red Rooster was outclassed? 
  • Taylor and Perfect do a bodyslam-floatover-bodyslam spot where Taylor ends up trying to slam Perfect but falls with him, damn near hitting a shoot Northern Lights Bomb.  That was weird.
  • Match ends out of nowhere as they fight on the floor, then Hennig hits the Perfectplex on Taylor, as he's getting back in, for the win.
  • I did notice Taylor was limping a lot.  Maybe that wasn't selling?  So I rewound to that wonky bodyslam spot and yep, Taylor came up lame when he landed and did a little hop.  He was favoring the leg after that and Wikipedia says he hurt his knee and was out for a while after this match.  So yeah, they went home early.  Not much of a match but what can you do?

Rougeaus & Martel vs Santana & The Rockers

  • So after a promo for another six man (Demolition & Duggan vs Twin Towers and Andre), we get this six man.  Aberration or is WWF getting into "do multiman matches to get everyone on the card" territory?
  • The Rougeaus are accompanied by Jimmy Hart and Martel is with Slick.  I honesty don't remember Slick managing him.
  • Everyone here except Earl Hebner, Jacques, and Slick, have mullets.  The golden age of mullets is upon us, friends!  And hey, maybe Slickster is rocking a mullet under that Kangol.
  • Not gonna lie, bros, I watch in bed some nights and I was dozing off on this one.  It was a fun enough six man, no real issues, but it was wayyyyyy too long for just a thing booked to get guys on the show and to further angles.  My guess is they got more time due to Hennig/Taylor going unexpectedly short.
  • Finish comes when the ref loses control and everybody is brawling.  Jannetty is pinning a Rougeau with a cradle but the ref is otherwise occupied, so Martel punches/forearms/clotheslines Jannetty and gets the win.  That's one thing I like about old wrestling.  You didn't need a foreign object in these situations -- you could just nail a dude unawares (like Arn did in the earlier match) and get him.  It's realistic and saves foreign objects' value.

Rude vs Warrior is up next!  Did Warrior get any better between Mania 5 and now? 

 

Edited by Technico Support
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think Warrior DID get better, but he's helped by a good match layout and Rude being great. I cannot wait to get your impressions of this match. I hope you go watch Summerslam '90 later on and talk about the cage match, too. 

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 minutes ago, SirSmellingtonofCascadia said:

I think Warrior DID get better, but he's helped by a good match layout and Rude being great. I cannot wait to get your impressions of this match. I hope you go watch Summerslam '90 later on and talk about the cage match, too. 

Thanks!  I'm going to check it out this weekend and write about it Monday.  I'll definitely get as far as 1990.  I'm toying with the idea of keeping this going through the New Generation era and stop before the Attitude Era.  I was going to just watch "The Golden Era" but the New Generation feels like such a cheesy extension of the 80s rather than a major change that I might stick with it.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Rick Rude (c) vs The Ultimate Warrior  ---------@SirSmellingtonofCascadiawas right, this is a good match!

  • We start off with a package detailing the history of this program.  I'm already wary because at one point, Rude piledrives Warrior and it's a herculean effort to get him to go up.  Later, they're, I guess, doing a gimmick where Warrior carries his jobber prey back to the dressing room, and he just drops this jobber in the entranceway with zero care at all.  Neither gives me warm feelings for how this match is going to go.  Also, at one point in the package, Warrior tries to press slam Rude from the ring onto Andre on the floor and Andre just says "fuck this, boss" on the catch and Rude eats floor.  Not to say I can blame Andre, since, in his deteriorating health, catching 200 plus pound Rude from five feet above would have turned him to dust like Thanos snapped his fingers.
  • They start the match with Warrior no-selling all Rude's stuff and returning fire on him.  "That's a smart way to do the shine," I think to myself.  "Just have Warrior do the bare minimum and let Rude do the work.  Hide Warrior's lack of skill."
  • BUT THEN Warrior tosses Rude out of the ring and hits him with a VERTICAL SUPLAY and I'm like WHERE THE FUCK DID THAT COME FROM?
  • Warrior takes over on offense and this match vs their awful Mania 5 encounter are night and day.  He's doing more than just turnbuckle whips and bearhugs.  His offense looks good.  He's not clumsy or dropping Rude on his head.  This is really good! 
  • There was a scary part for me when Warrioir hit Rude with two turnbuckle whips and I was deathly afraid he'd go back to a bearhug.  But he didn't, so cool.
  • Moves Warrior did in this match that I forgot he could do: sweet-ass powerslam where you catch your opponent running (I thought he only did that in the Wrestlefest game!), running powerslam, another vertical suplex in the ring!  And more. 
  • To be honest, though, Warrior still needed to tighten up that clothesline.
  • I can't check the WWE history page because it appears to have been hijacked by people selling black market dick pills.  Can someone tell me who Warrior worked on house shows between Mania and Summerslam?  It's crazy how much better he got from show to show.  Did he just work Rude for five months, perfecting the match?  I could believe that, because Rude is so fucking good.
  • Rude gets the heat cutting off a Warrior top rope move -- Warrior had hit one successfully earlier (!) -- and then the heat is all restholds.  Which I can forgive because Warrior needed to get his wind back after that sprint of a shine.
  • Warrior does fuck up on a Rude piledriver attempt, though, neglecting to grab the legs and just hanging there.  So Rude, just strong as fuck, just horks him up a little higher to save his life and hits a Ganso Bomb.  God DAMN.  Speaking of which, again, don't let the old heads bitch about how nobody respects moves anymore.  Warrior took TWO piledrivers here and neither was the finish.
  • Finish comes when Roddy Piper (ugh) comes out and shows Rude his pasty white ass, allowing Warrior to SUPLEX RUDE OFF THE BUCKLES and go to his finishing sequence for the win.
  • This would have been better without the interference, but they needed to transition Rude to Piper for the houses.
  • Again, this was a really good match and so much better than that god awful Mania 5 match.  I can definitely see Vince watching this and getting a massive erection figuring Warrior for his top guy down the road.  I really do need to know how he improved so quickly because I wouldn't even give Mania 5 Warrior my fifth-tier belt.
  • Now I can't wait for the next Summerslam as, apparently, it's Rude/Warrior in a cage.

Four matches to go.  My god, the next three undercard bouts before the main look awful.  Luckily, they total in time just a little longer than this one.  Still, I reserve the right to do a game day scratch and FFWD.  Depends on how I'm feeling.  Thanks again for reading!

Edited by Technico Support
  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, Technico Support said:

Rick Rude (c) vs The Ultimate Warrior  ---------@SirSmellingtonofCascadiawas right, this is a good match!

  • We start off with a package detailing the history of this program.  I'm already wary because at one point, Rude piledrives Warrior and it's a herculean effort to get him to go up.  Later, they're, I guess, doing a gimmick where Warrior carries his jobber prey back to the dressing room, and he just drops this jobber in the entranceway with zero care at all.  Neither gives me warm feelings for how this match is going to go.  Also, at one point in the package, Warrior tries to press slam Rude from the ring onto Andre on the floor and Andre just says "fuck this, boss" on the catch and Rude eats floor.  Not to say I can blame Andre, since, in his deteriorating health, catching 200 plus pound Rude from five feet above would have turned him to dust like Thanos snapped his fingers.
  • They start the match with Warrior no-selling all Rude's stuff and returning fire on him.  "That's a smart way to do the shine," I think to myself.  "Just have Warrior do the bare minimum and let Rude do the work.  Hide Warrior's lack of skill."
  • BUT THEN Warrior tosses Rude out of the ring and hits him with a VERTICAL SUPLAY and I'm like WHERE THE FUCK DID THAT COME FROM?
  • Warrior takes over on offense and this match vs their awful Mania 5 encounter are night and day.  He's doing more than just turnbuckle whips and bearhugs.  His offense looks good.  He's not clumsy or dropping Rude on his head.  This is really good! 
  • There was a scary part for me when Warrioir hit Rude with two turnbuckle whips and I was deathly afraid he'd go back to a bearhug.  But he didn't, so cool.
  • Moves Warrior did in this match that I forgot he could do: sweet-ass powerslam where you catch your opponent running (I thought he only did that in the Wrestlefest game!), running powerslam, another vertical suplex in the ring!  And more. 
  • To be honest, though, Warrior still needed to tighten up that clothesline.
  • I can't check the WWE history page because it appears to have been hijacked by people selling black market dick pills.  Can someone tell me who Warrior worked on house shows between Mania and Summerslam?  It's crazy how much better he got from show to show.  Did he just work Rude for five months, perfecting the match?  I could believe that, because Rude is so fucking good.
  • Rude gets the heat cutting off a Warrior top rope move -- Warrior had hit one successfully earlier (!) -- and then the heat is all restholds.  Which I can forgive because Warrior needed to get his wind back after that sprint of a shine.
  • Warrior does fuck up on a Rude piledriver attempt, though, neglecting to grab the legs and just hanging there.  So Rude, just strong as fuck, just horks him up a little higher to save his life and hits a Ganso Bomb.  God DAMN.  Speaking of which, again, don't let the old heads bitch about how nobody respects moves anymore.  Warrior too TWO piledrivers here and neither was the finish.
  • Finish comes when Roddy Piper (ugh) comes out and shows Rude his pasty white ass, allowing Warrior to SUPLEX RUDE OFF THE BUCKLES and go to his finishing sequence for the win.
  • This would have been better without the interference, but they needed to transition Rude to Piper for the houses.
  • Again, this was a really good match and so much better than that god awful Mania 5 match.  I can definitely see Vince watching this and getting a massive erection figuring Warrior for his top guy down the road.  I really do need to know how he improved so quickly because I wouldn't even give Mania 5 Warrior my fifth-tier belt.
  • Now I can't wait for the next Summerslam as, apparently, it's Rude/Warrior in a cage.

Four matches to go.  My god, the next three undercard bouts before the main look awful.  Luckily, they total in time just a little longer than this one.  Still, I reserve the right to do a game day scratch and FFWD.  Depends on how I'm feeling.  Thanks again for reading!

Looking on Cagematch, all of Warriors houseshow matches between Mania V and Summerslam were against Rude except for the month of August where it switched to facing Andre.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

6 minutes ago, porksweats said:

Looking on Cagematch, all of Warriors houseshow matches between Mania V and Summerslam were against Rude except for the month of August where it switched to facing Andre.

I figured!  Thanks!  Two more miracles and we can canonize Rude, right?  St. Richard, patron saint of upper body businesses and teaching muscleheads how not to be awful.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

6 hours ago, Technico Support said:

I figured!  Thanks!  Two more miracles and we can canonize Rude, right?  St. Richard, patron saint of upper body businesses and teaching muscleheads how not to be awful.

Definitely, though who is to say that Warrior's squash of Barry Horowitz didn't do wonders for his in ring game

  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Wrapping up SummerSlam 89!

Duggan and Demolition vs Andre, Akeem, and Bossman

  • A fan has an unfortunate sign that says DEMOLITION WILL TOPPLE THE TWIN TOWERS, complete with hand drawn WTC burning.  So either that kid is psychic (albeit a faulty one) or the 9/11 truthers have discovered time travel.
  • Duggan is wearing one of those cheap Halloween hockey masks painted black, with the American flag painted on his face, in an attempt to match Demolition's gear.  Jesse, a veteran, is appalled at this disgrace to old glory. 
  • The story is that the good guys dominate until Andre gets in and evens the odds.  Not bad.  Another good way to hide Andre, who is getting less mobile and more hunched over every time I see him.
  • It's funny watching Andre beat up his old partner in The Machines, Bill Eadie.
  • Match ends out of nowhere as there's a schmozz and Duggan gloms Akeem with the 2x4 as the ref is occupied with Andre.
  • Fun little meaningless six man that doesn't overstay its welcome.

Greg Valentine vs Hercules

  • Ron Garvin is out there to do the ring announcing, as he has an ongoing beef with Valentine.  Valentine apparently beat him in a retirement match, then Garvin became a ref but was fired from that for being biased against Valentine.  Garvin makes like this is a Greg Valentine roast and it's cheesy but not horrible.  
  • Just back and forth clubbering for a few minutes until Valentine does the Macho Man Wrestling Classic takedown in the corner with his feet on the ropes for the win.
  • Garvin announces Hercules as the winner and Valentine knocks him out of the ring, then Garvin comes back with the HANDS OF STONE.
  • Nothing match that's just a backdrop for the continuation of the Valentine/Garvin program.  I like these two from a "dudes who will just clubber dudes" standpoint and am looking forward to their Royal Rumble match.

DiBiase vs Snuka

  • Snuka is not as over the hill as I remembered him to be in this run.  He could definitely still go here but I'm pretty sure he deteriorated fast over the next few tears.
  • Jesse refers to him as "The Fly" several times and now I can't get that old U2 song out of my head.
  • Good Guy Tony Schiavone, your woke uncle, takes Jesse to task.  "Why are you calling him a Neanderthal?  Just because he's from the Fiji Islands???"  LET HIM KNOW, TONY!
  • Somebody modern needs to steal DiBiase's fistdrop and second rope falling back elbow.  I demand it.
  • Nothing happens in this match.  Snuka fights with Virgil and is counted out.  Then he hits Virgil with the Superfly Leap to send 'em home happy.

Hogan & Beefcake vs Savage & THE HUMAN WRECKING MACHINE ZEUS

  • I have to commend Tiny Lister's commitment to the character here.  There's a part in the promo package where Hogan hits him with a chair and he slowly, menacingly turns to Hogan like Jason Vorhees.  It's fucking awesome.  But of course as an actor who's primarily hired for how he looks, he's a great physical actor.  He's so fucking good.
  • There's an interview segment where the heels and SHERRI~! are peering into the Cauldron of The Madness to see the babyfaces' future and it's just fucking tremendous.  Sherri outdid Randy here and you didn't know that was possible.  Hell yeah.
  • Sherri hits the ring and a few hundred prepubescent boys in the crowd spontaneously develop thigh high and garter fetishes. 
  • Savage is wearing AWESOME white/silver gear with black writing and stars here and look a million times more like a main eventer.
  • Fun match, of course, with Randy proving his one of the best to ever do it, just traffic copping like his life depended on it.
  • Again, Lister is a revelation here.  This is a fucking actor out there and he's doing a passable job, not embarrassing himself.  I love when wrestling is a magic trick like this, where they can completely hide a limited worker's weaknesses perfectly.
  • Zeus' weakness is his eyes!  He's like a Punch Out villain.
  • Babyfaces win when Zeus is clobbered with Sherri's loaded purse (she'd used it earlier on Beefcake!  Psychology!), which puts him down just long enough for the count but not enough that they can't run this back.  Hell yeah.

So that's SummerSlam 89!  I have to say I recommend this show.  SURVIVOR SERIES 89 is up next. 

Edited by Technico Support
  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, DangerMark said:

I did know it was possible, but only because I've seen the promo(s) in question. She truly was the secret ingredient in the Cauldron of Madness.

Contrast that with her appearance on commentary during the Rumble earlier in the year!  It's amazing.

1 hour ago, Curt McGirt said:

In stark contrast...

Well look what he had to work with.  ?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...