Dolfan Watches Every Wrestlemania On Lockdown

[zendragon]

I'm kinda ok with Charles Wright getting into to the WWE Hall of Fame. kinda like a baseball player who's never an allstar but has a long careerand ends up with very good stats.

[odessasteps]

30 minutes ago, Curt McGirt said:

I checked Terry's Wiki to see if he'd worked WWF before the Executioner gimmick and this was my answer

No Stars and Bars for their debut (with Cyndi Lauper and David Wolff) 

 

[Ramo2653]

On 12/6/2020 at 2:53 PM, Andy in Kansas said:

Michaels showing up in his ring gear and Austin not was a weird choice. I guess Shawn really missed being shirtless in front of throngs of admirers. 

I believe the rumor around that time was that Vince told Shawn that he wanted him to work a match so he got into shape but then realized right before the event that it was just a segment.

[Curt McGirt]

Papa Shango was a big deal when I was a kid. I think if you can get two separate gimmicks over as much as that and the Godfather were, you should probably go in. (We'll leave Kama out of this.) On top of that he's part of BSK so there you go.

[Brian Fowler]

Godfather went in because everyone likes him back stage, he worked for the company for years, and he gets an easy nostalgia pop. Deserve has nothing to do with it.

[Dolfan in NYC]

DAY 102

It's cute to see which advertisers still have a relationship with the WWE, because we get a Snickers commercials where Zack Ryder cannot "Woo" correctly. Once he has a delicious 400 calorie chocolate bar, he can, because he's actually Charlotte. (This is a poor portent of what's coming.) And speaking of her...

So, for the previous few years, the scene has been dominated by the Bellas on the main roster - I mean this in the most insulting way possible. However, down in NXT, there have been 4 women who were ready to change the concept of what women's wrestling could be in the WWE.  They were built from the ground up and during the previous year, it was time for them to come up.  Well, three of them, anyway.   Becky Lynch, Sasha Banks, and Charlotte Flair are making their WrestleMania debuts - in wrestling roles.  (Technically this is Becky and Sasha's second, and Charlotte's third appearance.)

The story leading up to this is basically, since their debut, the three of these ladies are setting fire to the Divas roster. No one is on their level and Charlotte has crushed everyone in her path on the way to the Divas' Championship.  So, now it's time for all of them together to show what they can do.  And their prize?  The shiny new "WWE Women's Championship", as introduced by Lita. 

The crowd is pretty excited for the match as you can definitely feel the buzz.  After having ridden through the previous two decades of women's matches... so am I.  They're very happy to see Becky.  They're chuffed as fuck to see Snoop Dogg rap the Boss down to the ring.  And then Charlotte comes out. 

Now, Charlotte is a heel, but frankly, the crowd reaction is, aside from some woos... notably muted?  

The match quality is superb (though in 2020, familiar).  These three have been wrestling this match, or some variation thereof for the previous 3 or 4 years in NXT.  With the notable addition of Ric Flair sitting outside in Charlotte's corner.  And frankly, it's a testament to how good all three ladies are, they only botch one or two things throughout a 20 minute match.  Frankly a lot of the men on this show could have stopped an taken some notes.  

But... then there's the end.  

See, like I'd mentioned, Ric Flair is hanging out in the corner, like a pimple at the corner of your jaw.  You know it's there, you know it's going to cause your pain at the worst possible moment, and yet you kind of put it out of your mind. 

Well, Sasha's is tied up in the turnbuckles, Becky's got her dead to rights as she's knocked Charlotte out.  However, Sasha's got one last trick up her sleeve and does a neat reversal of a superplex into a floatover Backstabber into the Banks Statement.  Becky's a second from tapping and the crowd is going nuts, but here's Charlotte like Jason Voorhees... She throws Sasha out and gets Becky into the Figure 8 Leglock. And that's when it happens.  

You see, because the WWE cannot give them the moment.  Vince is too much of a hidebound, reactionary, bigoted old man to let these women, nay, these athletes, who'd been working their asses off for years to push this whole "women's wrestling" thing completely over the top. The three women who'd built this program for years and had made it, at this point, far and away the best feud in the WWE had to be hampered down by the thought that "heels have to cheat to win."  And in this case, the proverbial painful jawline pimple just popped right before your the big date.  

Ric Flair grabs Sasha's leg in full view of the crowd and everyone except the referee.  The crowd sees it and NOTICEABLY gets quiet.  They know what's happening.  Because Charlotte, you see, is merely a girl and cannot finish off her opponents without her father's (or more accurately, a man's) help.  

Becky's exhausted and in blinding pain, and taps to the F8.  And the crowd doesn't pop.... they just go quiet.  

What should have been the pop of the night... what should have been the ascension of women's professional wrestling... just dies on the vine.  

Charlotte is the new WWE Women's Champion and the crowd is pissed.  

I get that she's a super athlete and the face of the franchise.  I get that she's a heel and breaks rules to win.  I get that she's the one you want to build around.  But god damn it, this was the absolute wrong choice in getting there.  There was so much potential behind this moment, and Vince couldn't let them have it.  (Plus, it's abundantly clear, the crowd wanted Banks to go over here.)

I was seriously smiling the whole match until the end.  It frankly was even better than I remembered.  But, just by grabbing Sasha's leg, Ric Flair single-handedly ruined the entire match.  

Oh well, let me press on to whatever's next... 

Oh.

[Spontaneous]

I'm sure they'll book the women better going forward at Wrestlemania... they can't possibly shove Charlotte further down everyone's throats right?

[NikoBaltimore]

4 hours ago, Dolfan in NYC said:

DAY 102

It's cute to see which advertisers still have a relationship with the WWE, because we get a Snickers commercials where Zack Ryder cannot "Woo" correctly. Once he has a delicious 400 calorie chocolate bar, he can, because he's actually Charlotte. (This is a poor portent of what's coming.) And speaking of her...

So, for the previous few years, the scene has been dominated by the Bellas on the main roster - I mean this in the most insulting way possible. However, down in NXT, there have been 4 women who were ready to change the concept of what women's wrestling could be in the WWE.  They were built from the ground up and during the previous year, it was time for them to come up.  Well, three of them, anyway.   Becky Lynch, Sasha Banks, and Charlotte Flair are making their WrestleMania debuts - in wrestling roles.  (Technically this is Becky and Sasha's second, and Charlotte's third appearance.)

The story leading up to this is basically, since their debut, the three of these ladies are setting fire to the Divas roster. No one is on their level and Charlotte has crushed everyone in her path on the way to the Divas' Championship.  So, now it's time for all of them together to show what they can do.  And their prize?  The shiny new "WWE Women's Championship", as introduced by Lita. 

The crowd is pretty excited for the match as you can definitely feel the buzz.  After having ridden through the previous two decades of women's matches... so am I.  They're very happy to see Becky.  They're chuffed as fuck to see Snoop Dogg rap the Boss down to the ring.  And then Charlotte comes out. 

Now, Charlotte is a heel, but frankly, the crowd reaction is, aside from some woos... notably muted?  

The match quality is superb (though in 2020, familiar).  These three have been wrestling this match, or some variation thereof for the previous 3 or 4 years in NXT.  With the notable addition of Ric Flair sitting outside in Charlotte's corner.  And frankly, it's a testament to how good all three ladies are, they only botch one or two things throughout a 20 minute match.  Frankly a lot of the men on this show could have stopped an taken some notes.  

But... then there's the end.  

See, like I'd mentioned, Ric Flair is hanging out in the corner, like a pimple at the corner of your jaw.  You know it's there, you know it's going to cause your pain at the worst possible moment, and yet you kind of put it out of your mind. 

Well, Sasha's is tied up in the turnbuckles, Becky's got her dead to rights as she's knocked Charlotte out.  However, Sasha's got one last trick up her sleeve and does a neat reversal of a superplex into a floatover Backstabber into the Banks Statement.  Becky's a second from tapping and the crowd is going nuts, but here's Charlotte like Jason Voorhees... She throws Sasha out and gets Becky into the Figure 8 Leglock. And that's when it happens.  

You see, because the WWE cannot give them the moment.  Vince is too much of a hidebound, reactionary, bigoted old man to let these women, nay, these athletes, who'd been working their asses off for years to push this whole "women's wrestling" thing completely over the top. The three women who'd built this program for years and had made it, at this point, far and away the best feud in the WWE had to be hampered down by the thought that "heels have to cheat to win."  And in this case, the proverbial painful jawline pimple just popped right before your the big date.  

Ric Flair grabs Sasha's leg in full view of the crowd and everyone except the referee.  The crowd sees it and NOTICEABLY gets quiet.  They know what's happening.  Because Charlotte, you see, is merely a girl and cannot finish off her opponents without her father's (or more accurately, a man's) help.  

Becky's exhausted and in blinding pain, and taps to the F8.  And the crowd doesn't pop.... they just go quiet.  

What should have been the pop of the night... what should have been the ascension of women's professional wrestling... just dies on the vine.  

Charlotte is the new WWE Women's Champion and the crowd is pissed.  

I get that she's a super athlete and the face of the franchise.  I get that she's a heel and breaks rules to win.  I get that she's the one you want to build around.  But god damn it, this was the absolute wrong choice in getting there.  There was so much potential behind this moment, and Vince couldn't let them have it.  (Plus, it's abundantly clear, the crowd wanted Banks to go over here.)

I was seriously smiling the whole match until the end.  It frankly was even better than I remembered.  But, just by grabbing Sasha's leg, Ric Flair single-handedly ruined the entire match.  

Oh well, let me press on to whatever's next... 

Oh.

Did they cut out the part where Flair kissed Becky?  Because that was uncomfortable and pointless and I remember people not being happy with that one bit.

Also, Sasha definitely should have won.  It was all there.  The Snoop entrance.  The Eddie-style tights.  And just Sasha being awesome in general.  I remember myself and most others at the bar I was at were just ready for her obvious win.  The excitement was building the longer it went.  Then the finish happened and we were all incredibly deflated.

[mattdangerously]

5 hours ago, Six String Orchestra said:

I'm sure they'll book the women better going forward at Wrestlemania... they can't possibly shove Charlotte further down everyone's throats right?

Stares at you in John Cena

[Dolfan in NYC]

3 hours ago, NikoBaltimore said:

Did they cut out the part where Flair kissed Becky?  Because that was uncomfortable and pointless and I remember people not being happy with that one bit.

Also, Sasha definitely should have won.  It was all there.  The Snoop entrance.  The Eddie-style tights.  And just Sasha being awesome in general.  I remember myself and most others at the bar I was at were just ready for her obvious win.  The excitement was building the longer it went.  Then the finish happened and we were all incredibly deflated.

Yes, they cut it.  He just started woo'ing at Becky and then got taken out by a flying Sasha.  

[Dolfan in NYC]

Cut back to Fall 2015.  I was talking to my friend Katie.  She is a consultant that does work in building e-commerce websites. She told me, hey, I'm working on a project for WWE (revamping WWE.com and the WWEShop)... you know Shane?  He's coming back soon.  At this point, Shane had been gone for years.  I'd bought the line about him going to 'build his own fortune' in Chinese PPV.  (He did do that outside of WWE, but it was supposedly unsuccessful and he'd been behind the scenes in WWE basically doing nothing.) 

Fast forward to a Monday in February when I'm at the gym finishing a workout with my partner and I'm doing my thing on the elliptical,  USA was on and Stephanie had just received some award for something that semi-successful businesswomen get.  Looking at the hype video, the trophy looks suspiciously fake - mainly because it just looks like the architectural renderings of the new 2 World Trade Center that never got built. Anyway, "Here Comes The Money" hits halfway through Vince and Stephanie congratulating themselves and here's Shane.   I was genuinely shocked, and remembered that I added 10 minutes to my run just to watch the segment.  (My partner wasn't thrilled about that.)

So, basically, the literal Prodigal Fail-son is back and wants to save the company from Vince.  This is an easy sell to the WWE faithful as Vince is in full "ram my wishes down your throat" mode.  So, Vince said that was fine.  So long as he beat the Undertaker at WrestleMania.  (Not enough was made about Vince pulling an unacknowledged Teddy Long "Holla holla" meme.)   Taker was like "fine, fuck, whatever." (Technically his stip was he'd never wrestle at Mania again if he lost.) So we have a match. 

Oh, and it's in Hell in a Cell, just for fun. 

Shane is no longer the punk kid who was rich so all the shop owners had to look the other way when he destroyed their shit... so he comes out, salt and pepper haired, and  brings out his three sons with him to dance to the ring.  (I'm sure we'll learn to hate at least one of them by the end of this decade when they take the WWE Championship off... hmm... let's say, Kenny Omega at SummerSlam 2028.)

This match is an absolute crashing fucking bore.  I mean it is awful.   This is the first time my partner Alex has been around when I'm riding.  We're drawn into a debate about how the Undertaker's character is about as perfect pro-wrestling as you can get.  And yeah, it really is.  It is the perfect mix of fantasy, fighting, storytelling, and ability.  I also have to note, the Undertaker character would not have worked as little as 7-8 years later.  An undead sorcerer would have been laughed at in the rapidly "smart"-ening audience of the late 90's.   Which is why I brought up Brock as being, basically the perfect pro wrestler.  

(Oh Shane is 'taking control' of the match and is using the time to cut a side off the cage. Hey Shane, you've got a gigantic metal club in your hand that you're using to cut the fencing bolts.  Go use it on your opponent, idiot.)

Brock adds the mix of legitimacy that the crowd post-Attitude era, who's now seen "real fighters" thanks to UFC and frankly the more down to earth characters of Stone Cold Steve Austin and The Rock.  And yes that's a hell of an ironic statement. I get that those two guys are personalities turned up from 10 to 100, but they're not supernaturally powered creatures from another world.  He's not a fan of Brock so he starts reading something instead.  

(Shane's outside, and it's the moment we're all waiting for.  He starts climbing.  I should also note the idiocy of Shane fucking McMahon kicking out or escaping out of THREE finishers.)  

It's a real shame that my buddy is now watching this terrible match, because I've seen some absolute gems, and it's made this whole lockdown/workout thing infinitely more tolerable.  But Taker is in a steep, steep decline by this point in his career.  

(Shane's on top, sign of the cross.  WHEE!  Of course, Taker moves.  "For the love of mankind...", Michael Cole says.  Ugh.  Fuck this fucking match.)

I do not know what possessed them to book this match.  Honestly.  The even better part was Vince actually originally intended Shane to fucking win! Supposedly Taker vetoed that, because... jesus christ.

(Shane somehow is back to his knees. He gives Undertaker the bring it motion. Taker takes him into the ring and pats him on the head... because this match hasn't lasted long enough. And bring it, he does.  Tombstone.  23-1.)

Yeah, that could be the worst of the STREAK~ matches so far.  It was long, pointless, boring, unbelievable(!!!), and plodding.  The literal only thing they did right was have Taker go over.  Because there is zero justification, in any universe, of Shane beating the god damned Undertaker clean. 

Shane's in need of medical attention, and if I don't get off this bike, so will I.  

End of D... 

Wait.  

I hear a rustling outside my window on my AC.  

HE'S BACK!   Tua is back and looking quite plump for the winter!   

He's only around for a minute, looks around and leaves.  But hey, maybe things aren't so bad.   

End of Day 102.  

 

 

[DJ Hero Morganti]

Tua! Tua! Tua!

[John from Cincinnati]

Sounds like Tua might be a candidate for those hoss classes at the PC. 

[Brian Fowler]

I think I was alone in my reaction to Shane's return, but it was basically "aw fuck not another fucking McMahon. Why the fuck are you idiots cheering?"

And that match was so fucking bad. And long.

(FWIW, I don't think all of Shane's outside ventures actually failed. I believe he's still part of that company in China to some degree.)

[Spontaneous]

I love how Shane's jiu jitsu is hyped up by the commentary as he agonizingly tries to place his legs for a triangle choke. His shadow boxing nonsense was already rough but now he's some fearsome black belt. I guess the match did draw some attention for a Mania card that was falling apart at the time. 

[WholeFnMachine]

6 hours ago, Six String Orchestra said:

I love how Shane's jiu jitsu is hyped up by the commentary as he agonizingly tries to place his legs for a triangle choke. His shadow boxing nonsense was already rough but now he's some fearsome black belt. I guess the match did draw some attention for a Mania card that was falling apart at the time. 

I’m a BJJ brown belt under Matt Serra, Shane’s BJJ is dogshit. 

[Dolfan in NYC]

DAY 103

The WrestleMania pre-show panel is on to say what a great match they just saw. This marks the Mania debuts of Renee Young(~) and C*rey Gr*ves.  Moving on.

It's time for the "Let's Get All the Men a WrestleMania Payday" special, the Andre the Giant Battle Royale.  This year it's 16 main roster guys (Fandango, Damien Sandow, Big Show, The Ascension, Diamond Dallas Page, Jack Swagger, R-Truth, Goldust, Curtis Axel, Adam Rose, Heath Slater, Tyler Breeze, Mark Henry, Bo Dallas, Darren Young, and Kane), 1 NXT surprise (Baron Corbin), 2 Legends (Tatanka, Diamond Dallas Page), and 1 Shaquille O'Neal. 

The story (at first) was Shaq and Big Show had promised to throw down at a WrestleMania a couple of years before, but Shaq either "got injured" (*BZZZT*) or "didn't care enough to do the training" (*ding ding ding*), so the whole thing got called off.  The other 18 guys decide to watch the Godzilla/Rodan fight for a moment before finally deciding to all gang up on them and throw them out.  I was ready to complain that they all didn't attack at once, but then they actually did...  so, good for them.

Actually Shaq's elimination looked exactly what an untrained person getting thrown from about 8-10' up would look like.  I think the only thing saving him from breaking his legs on the way down was knowing how to flop thanks to an extensive NBA career. 

Watching from 2020, I instantly realize how much of a John Morrison rip off Adam Rose was. My goodness, I actually thought to myself, I didn't remember Morrison being back even temporarily at this point. 

The jobbers had a stable (Bo, Axel, Slater, and Young) so they were just being general shitheads to everyone else and it was funny enough when they got eliminated.  It really is something, those 4 guys all make so little impression.  They really are the embodiment of the Oceans 11 speech Brad Pitt gives to Matt Damon, "he has to see you, engage with you, and forget you the moment you're out of his sight."  

So, in a pretty big shock, Baron Corbin wins when he tosses Kane at the end.  It was clear that they had big plans for Corbin by this point, but he really should have taken this win and been in NXT for another 6 months or so of seasoning.  Maybe even a run as NXT Champion, doing his "I hate indie guys" gimmick with the trophy as his proof of how much better he was then them.   As it was, he debuted the next night and was instantly killed dead by having a feud with Dolph Ziggler, who somehow got the "NXT call up's first feud" role and abjectly sucked at it.  

The battle royale itself though was actually a lot better than I remembered.  Relatively quick, inoffensive, couple of cute moments and surprises.  Which, I cannot say for what's next.  

 

[Spontaneous]

Corbin telling Apollo Crews/former Evolve standout Uhaa Nation to go back to ROH will always crack me up. I think this was also the last time winning the Andre the Giant battle royal meant anything/helped anyone. 

[Dolfan in NYC]

The Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders are here to dance for this crowd. What music are they dancing too...  well.... I"ll just say, I'm getting to dread every time I hear "IF YA SMELL..." and I know the Rock isn't wrestling. 

Sure enough, I'm thinking "though it may make my ride long, I can probably fit in the Rock segment and the main event on this run."   LOL no.  

The Rock takes about 5 minutes to get to the ring itself, including a pyro display where he literally sets his name on fire.  This of course symbolizes Rock's defeat of WWE for copyright ownership of his name.  Vince is seriously lucky the biggest action star on the planet, still thinks he owes him anything. 

Anyway, Rock is here because olympic-sized infinity pools overlooking the Pacific don't just pay for themselves.  He tells the crowd to go home and fuck. He's also there to tell the crowd they are a new WWE record crowd.  It's actually funny because:  a) they actually WERE the biggest paid crowd in WWE history, b) Vince still  felt the need to juice the number, and c) Rock clearly has zero idea what  that number actually is, because he has to look up at the Jerry-tron above the ring to see what the number actually was.  Rock finishes by thanking the crowd.

This part took about 10 minutes.  

And that's the cue for Bray Wyatt's music.  Note: "Broken Out In Love" is really a fantastic song - I've grown to dislike the remake he's currently using - but when I'm quickly approaching exhaustion for the ride... Bray's slow ass needs to hurry up and get to the fucking ring already.  He's got Erick Rowan and the debuting Braun Strowman in tow.  The rest of the segment is going to go horribly for the Wyatts, but seeing tens of thousands of cell phone lights on is an amazing visual.  

Bray says he's chosen the Rock to beat up.  Rock destroys Bray, Erick, and Braun on the mic in 3 sentences and challenges them to a match.   

Rowan is picked and loses "in 6 seconds", which I'll note is the only time they actually hurried in this segment.  

Bray - who possesses Wile E. Coyote levels of genius, finally decides to go three on one.  This draws out the other Hollywood star who now owes Vince absolutely nothing else, John Cena.  They, of course, slaughter the Wyatts.  

You know, there are times that I'd think: getting to interact with the two biggest names in the industry is always a good thing.   This was not that.   

This was making a current rising - but wobbly - star getting knocked down several pegs.  Because no matter how much you think he can hang with the big boys, he very obviously cannot.  

Oof.  That was a yikes segment to look back on.  But it's nothing compared to what is up next.

End of Day 103. 

[Brian Fowler]

I don't hate that segment because of how incredibly fucking long it is.

I don't hate that segment because of how pointless it is.

I don't hate that segment because of how a part timer and a not at all part of the campanyer punked out four full-time guys.

No, I hate that segment because it's the sole reason I can't claim to have been at The Rock's last ever match. Because of a fucking six second joke of a technicality.

[Ramo2653]

20 hours ago, Dolfan in NYC said:

The Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders are here to dance for this crowd. What music are they dancing too...  well.... I"ll just say, I'm getting to dread every time I hear "IF YA SMELL..." and I know the Rock isn't wrestling. 

Sure enough, I'm thinking "though it may make my ride long, I can probably fit in the Rock segment and the main event on this run."   LOL no.  

The Rock takes about 5 minutes to get to the ring itself, including a pyro display where he literally sets his name on fire.  This of course symbolizes Rock's defeat of WWE for copyright ownership of his name.  Vince is seriously lucky the biggest action star on the planet, still thinks he owes him anything. 

Anyway, Rock is here because olympic-sized infinity pools overlooking the Pacific don't just pay for themselves.  He tells the crowd to go home and fuck. He's also there to tell the crowd they are a new WWE record crowd.  It's actually funny because:  a) they actually WERE the biggest paid crowd in WWE history, b) Vince still  felt the need to juice the number, and c) Rock clearly has zero idea what  that number actually is, because he has to look up at the Jerry-tron above the ring to see what the number actually was.  Rock finishes by thanking the crowd.

This part took about 10 minutes.  

And that's the cue for Bray Wyatt's music.  Note: "Broken Out In Love" is really a fantastic song - I've grown to dislike the remake he's currently using - but when I'm quickly approaching exhaustion for the ride... Bray's slow ass needs to hurry up and get to the fucking ring already.  He's got Erick Rowan and the debuting Braun Strowman in tow.  The rest of the segment is going to go horribly for the Wyatts, but seeing tens of thousands of cell phone lights on is an amazing visual.  

Bray says he's chosen the Rock to beat up.  Rock destroys Bray, Erick, and Braun on the mic in 3 sentences and challenges them to a match.   

Rowan is picked and loses "in 6 seconds", which I'll note is the only time they actually hurried in this segment.  

Bray - who possesses Wile E. Coyote levels of genius, finally decides to go three on one.  This draws out the other Hollywood star who now owes Vince absolutely nothing else, John Cena.  They, of course, slaughter the Wyatts.  

You know, there are times that I'd think: getting to interact with the two biggest names in the industry is always a good thing.   This was not that.   

This was making a current rising - but wobbly - star getting knocked down several pegs.  Because no matter how much you think he can hang with the big boys, he very obviously cannot.  

Oof.  That was a yikes segment to look back on.  But it's nothing compared to what is up next.

End of Day 103. 

Same podcast Austin tells the story about tearing his shoulder in the legends segment, he talks about seeing Rowan in the back after this segment and just says to him "sorry kid" Which sums that whole segment up.

[DreamBroken]

the shane O 2016 return is an all time great crowd pop, one of my favorite moments. Amazing reaction as the chants cycle through Shane O Mac/Welcome Back/Holy Shit/This is Awesome.

the Rock seg was the birth of the 7 hour Manias/going past 11 PM est. I remember seeing it was 10 30 wondering what was going on, knowing the main was still to come.

On 12/10/2020 at 1:03 PM, NikoBaltimore said:

Did they cut out the part where Flair kissed Becky?  Because that was uncomfortable and pointless and I remember people not being happy with that one bit.

Also, Sasha definitely should have won.  It was all there.  The Snoop entrance.  The Eddie-style tights.  And just Sasha being awesome in general.  I remember myself and most others at the bar I was at were just ready for her obvious win.  The excitement was building the longer it went.  Then the finish happened and we were all incredibly deflated.

Flair kissing Becky was actually at the Rumble prior to this WM, but yes it's edited out of the Network.

agreed on Sasha. Last time I rewatched it, Sasha's entrance stood out huge as screaming 'star'.  A shame how her stock had fallen the last few years.

[Dolfan in NYC]

DAY 104

Did you know, the reactions to Roman Reigns and how insanely bad they have been, have their own Wikipedia article?  

It's just astounding to me.  Every wrestler you talk to says, Roman is a god in the ring.  Basically the perfect professional wrestler.  Insanely talented.   And yet none of them could ever explain why he's got such negative heat.  It didn't help that when the Shield broke up the word leaked quickly that Roman was the prize pig and was going to get a colossal mega-push.  The fanbase had just gotten rid of John Cena and was very disinterested in "John Cena 2.0".  

Well, sufferin' succotash, John Cena 2.0 is exactly what they got.  (I remember cringing so, so hard when he gave that promo.) The WWE put the strap on him finally at Survivor Series because Seth Rollins suffered a gruesome knee injury and had to be stripped of the strap.  (My guess is Vince wanted to do Seth/Roman here, for what it's worth.)  But then he lost the title to Sheamus.  He quickly won it back, but now his whole persona was on weak legs...  And then he was made to defend the title in the 2016 Royal Rumble match, which he did not do.  

HHH won Rumble '16 for his 14th (and final... so far) championship and a ticket to WrestleMania. And Vince, who has a massive hard on for underdog storylines thought he had a way to do so with Roman Reigns.  So Reigns wins Elimination Chamber, and here we are.

Oh and while I thought I was going to be able to make this a multiple match day, I forgot.... HHH is in this match... and HHH has a WrestleMania entrance....  Christ.  

Stephanie is on some throne scaffolding(?) delivering a weird  promo about how she and Hunter were so much better than everyone. You straights need to tell me if she was going for 'sexy evil queen' here, because if she was, she did not hit that mark.  Thankfully, she didn't follow Hunter to the ring.  

Sprinting time.  I'll note, it takes HHH about 2 minutes to get to the fucking ring and then spends another minute or so posing and walking around the ring like a dork while they set up the pyro for Roman. 4 minutes is a LONG god damned time to be pedaling as fast as possible.  Normally I can average about 20mph (~32kph) during these sprints, but I'm not coming close to that at the end and my legs are starting to tremble by the effort.  

Fucking finally. Lemmy's done and here's "Not The Shield's Theme".  The crowd isn't happy to see Roman.  Cool pyro though.   My legs hurt.  

Roman gets to the stupid ring and we have to do ring intros because Vince thought they were cool to do in the ring.  I'll tell you what... this *may* be an unpopular position, but I really prefer the intros to happen on the way to the ring.  And while we're at it, they need to get back to introing EVERYONE that comes to the ring.  Jobbers through main eventers.  If they're coming to the ring, I want to know who they are.  

Oh, and Vince was right about Justin Roberts trying to put himself over during the announcements.  He's one of the more annoying parts of AEW.  

So... the match.  

You know, I'm sitting here a few days later trying to recall the match, and I'm getting nothing.  The match is aiming for "epic war" and instead misses completely and hits "ephemeral pabulum."  

Hunter's god damned desire to make everything epic, should have worked here.  It's the rare case where he's working to put Roman over as the new face of the company. As an absolute monster of a man, who can take a hellacious beatdown, but just smiles and keeps on coming at you like a Mack truck.   And Roman's doing fine as the face in peril (a role Roman fucking Reigns should *never* be in, btw).  And HHH is looking like a dominant champ.  But they're missing one big thing.

Buy in from the crowd.  

This crowd is 100% certain that Roman is winning the title.  There's no doubt in their minds. In their frustration with the situation, they've taken to booing Roman and cheering HHH.  Like literally nothing Roman's doing is getting them to buy in.  Oh, and they just lustily boo any of his signature spots ("loading up the Superman punch" especially draws their ire -- to be completely fair though, it is corny as fuck).  

So, this half hour of Sports Entertainment At Its Finest, is finally mercifully ended as Roman spears Hunter and wins his 3rd championship in his big moment.  The crowd - for a WrestleMania main fucking event - barely reacts.  Though I'm 90% sure my memory is correct and they booed the fuck out of this and the music got turned up on them, along with the pyro celebrating Roman's new championship. 

The next day at Raw Roman would give his "I'm not a good guy, I'm not a bad guy, I'm just The Guy."  (Which as we know is patently false, as the only "Guy" is Guy Smiley.  And I will fight whoever says otherwise.) Roman lost the title two months later because he was about to get suspended for PEDs.  Really sums up what a waste this whole thing was.

---

There were points there that this WrestleMania could have been saved.  But everything from the Ric Flair leg grab onwards was "meh" to "oh god why am I watching this."  I really hope Brock does a quick 3-6 month deal with AEW and they get to do a Mox-Brock rematch with what happened here serving as the backstory. And Jericho/AJ was the best surprise I got while re-watching. But wow, the segments that were bad... holy crap...  

And much like the ladies match, things would have gone so much better with just some tweaks here and there.  Maybe all the heels don't have to go over?  Maybe?  And never let Ric Flair be ringside during a women's match ever again.  (This one, I believe, has been done though.)

So, it's not the worst, but it's not the best.  But it certainly was the longest. And there's nothing on earth that could possibly make it any longer!  

Nope... nothing at all.  

...

Um. 

...

Onto Orlando!  

End of Day 104. 

[Brian Fowler]

I know WrestleMania has kept getting longer every year, but none have felt as long as that fucking Dallas show did, at least to me.

[thee Reverend Axl Future]

Only In Modern Wrestling, pt. 253 - Can a wrestler be the "best" is the crowd reacts negatively to him?

Also, I perceive that RReigns suffered from the crap-ass lengthy year before of the mega-push of Rollins as the Chosen One of the evil GM/real-president/The Authority/VKM - Rollins was supposed to be the best, but he didn't wrestle as such, and he was aligned with the main heels, but he was still the focus. The audience was sick of being forced fed "the next Cena/Rock/Austin/cash cow" and the accompanying  storylines, and so were ready to shit all over the next pick (shoot or work), whether or not he was worthy, deserving and/or "the best". 

Argh, I feel like I can't express this thought succinctly. I also regret not requesting before and after pics of Dolfan's calves.

- RAF