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Fuck the Existence of B*g C*ss - SDL - 5/29/2018


The Natural

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13 minutes ago, Rick said:

I turned off and went to bed after Cass' music hit, I knew what was coming. I don't know if there's ever been a wrestler that had that kinda power to make me switch off entirely. Credit to Cass I guess, I had a wonderful sleep. 

Pretty much ditto. This was literally the match that I was looking forward to this week outside of 205 and NXT and this poor man’s edge literally made me turn off the TV. I am so done with Cass. It is not like I think he terrible but this entire feud is everything I didn’t want for Bryan’s first feud back. I waited for 2 years for this dude to come back and instead of striking iron when it is hot and throw him in the ring with literally anyone else, I get Cass. A mediocre dude who may one day get it together but honestly just feels like he is in the way. 

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It's funny, I got to see all of Cass and Enzo in NXT and I called it as a little guy with an intro and catchphrase who would bore people to tears within about three months of being on the main roster and a big guy that just needed more experience and he'd be a significant addition to the main roster... Damn, I nailed it on Enzo, but I couldn't have been more wrong when it came to Big Cass. I don't think I've seen a wrestler as fundamentally shitty with no intention of trying to improve since ol' Softball Sid. His promos have gone from being the lesser of two guys pushing a catchphrase to "big guy yelling incoherently". His ringwork, oh, sweet tap-dancing Jesus, his ringwork...  He makes  Jinder Mahal seem like Harley Race. He's not just a channel changer for me, he's an "I won't bother watching the whole program because his silly ass is likely to be on it and as much as I like Nak, Danielson, etc. I just can't be bothered," as I know one of my favorites will be getting dragged straight into the mire of mediocrity by this oaf. Fuck it, send him to the Philippines to work with that jerk that sets himself on fire...

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7 minutes ago, RIPPA said:

ALMAS IS TALKING TO SIN CARA! WORST CALL UP EVER! MIGHT AS WELL RELEASE HIM!!!

Let me translate that:

Sin Cara: Hey old buddy!
Almas: Uh, yeah, look, I know you think you're Caristico, but I don't actually know you.

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Ok, bit from the Observer recap made me laugh:

Quote

As Paige continued walking, Renee Young caught up with her for an interview. Paige made sure to keep walking and brought Renee with her. (Walking gives the illusion of the story moving forward.)

Cass in a suit is one of the more awkward visuals they've presented us lately.  He looks really uncomfortable dressed up.  It reminds me of something Dean (remember him) used to say, something along the lines of "This is what it looks like when your contractor has a court date." 

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Cass looks weird in a suit because he wears weird fitting suits. Is that what the fashion trend is or something? Can someone get this guy a fuckin' tailor? 

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I watched highlights of the show on YT and am surprised no one mentioned the awesome clip of Miz preparing for his match by swatting pancakes out of the sir while blindfolded.  That was genuinely intentionally funny - which is a rarity for WWE scripted humour. 

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Watched the main event. Thought it was pretty fun. Daniel Bryan fucking OWNED that crowd. He had some fun spots too.

I've been trying not to go into the matches thinking Big Cass is actually terrible. Sometimes I can't tell if people hate on him just because of other shit outside of the ring. So I try to watch with an open mind. For this match he hit his big spots pretty cleanly. He was usually where he needed to be except for that one part when he rolled out, took a knee and Joe looked at him like "Get back in the ring it's me and you, dummy." 

He reminds me a little bit of Matt Morgan, who was huge, but never felt huge when he got in the ring. Something about the way he moved. Cass is like that but instead of having the benefit of a big physique, he has long spindly looking limbs and chin pubes, and nothing feels "BIG" about him, even though he's a giant. He's just a long person. His "clubbing blows" are very...slappy. Like it felt like he was just reaching out and slapping Joe on the back with his spider arms. I'm sure if I met him I'd be like "Goddamn you're a big guy," but even on TV against Daniel Bryan....who is fucking LITTLE.... Cass feels small. 

He might get better. With Enzo he was able to just do the hot tag big spots and be done. Now he has to work a little more and we're seeing a lot of weak spots that he should have had polish a long time ago. But I've seen worse get better.

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3 hours ago, Keep Calm, Akira Hokuto On said:

Ok, bit from the Observer recap made me laugh:

Cass in a suit is one of the more awkward visuals they've presented us lately.  He looks really uncomfortable dressed up.  It reminds me of something Dean (remember him) used to say, something along the lines of "This is what it looks like when your contractor has a court date." 

or when you have to go to a funeral and the only suit you own is the one you wore to a wedding ten years ago

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I don't find Vince pushing guys that are entirely not ready into main event slots just because of their size funny anymore. I'm done with the experiments. You don't promote Bryan/Joe for a week, run articles and videos promising the match only to insert some under-developed goof into the match and ruin the show. I'd have been pissed if I paid for a ticket to watch it. 

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There's a certain visceral investment to how I feel every time Cass tries to big boot Bryan. When he ducked it in the triple threat, I let out a big sigh of relief. Then I cringed post-match. If this is the new suspension of disbelief, I don't know if I like it.

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19 minutes ago, Curt McGirt said:

Them having no idea how to present him as a heel and just going back to the Jericho Well of "well dressed and erudite" amuses me. 

The only suit Cass should be wearing is a track suit. He's still a guido from Queens. It'd be one thing if they tried to drop the guido character, but they haven't really. If he's dropping that, he should be referred to as Colin Cassidy. Then, I'd be ok with him in a suit trying to escape his past gimmick. If he keeps the same character, have him go full Mafia, then put him in a suit that fits.

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The bait and switch on Joe/Bryan is egregious. If it's their way of trying to give Cass Roman-style positioning heat, they can stop right away. I got excited all week to see two of my favorites face off even though I knew it was probably not going to end cleanly, but I didn't even get to see that. I'm not a Cass hater either (especially since the Trump lover stuff was debunked) but he's clearly not where he should be on the card given what he can do. Hopefully, Daniel can squash Cass and move on to Joe for a proper singles match and then Miz at Summerslam.

And Cass needs a tailor stat if he's going to keep wearing suits. His off the rack from a big and tall shop numbers are the pits.

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Best Mandy Rose has looked since she wrestled Ember Moon on an NXT Show a while back. Surprised that they had the match be as competitive as it was as I expected Asuka to just kill her. 

The Dance Off was a nice, silly little Diva Era throwback. All six people involved should have a fun match next week though. 

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29 minutes ago, Nice Guy Eddie said:

The only suit Cass should be wearing is a track suit. He's still a guido from Queens. It'd be one thing if they tried to drop the guido character, but they haven't really. If he's dropping that, he should be referred to as Colin Cassidy. Then, I'd be ok with him in a suit trying to escape his past gimmick. If he keeps the same character, have him go full Mafia, then put him in a suit that fits.

Yeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssss. When it comes to heels though, unless you're Randy Orton, WWE creative can only think of Jericho's heel run when it comes to how you should dress. Cass looks so goofy and awkward in it. 

I like jae's optimism, but my optimism for Cass was already burned up awhile ago. I loved Enzo and Cass as a tag team and as soon as they split them up it was pretty clear that they would push Cass because he's a giant and he's nowhere close to being ready. Even then, I tried to be optimistic for the guy. His big man offense is not great. Everything he does is soft serve and the highest compliment I can give him is that at least he doesn't move like a rusty tin man even if he does look like the most uncoordinated guy on the roster. So anyway, any optimism I had faded just before he was injured.

Watching Cass reminds me one of the Edge and Christian podcasts where they got a question about how do you improve your footwork in the ring. Their response was that your footwork is one of the last things you'll get and you can only work at it. Edge said he still didn't think his footwork was the best by the time he retired, I think. For Cass, maybe that comes along in time, but I almost wonder if he's too lanky to ever look comfortable in the ring.

Anyway, Cass should be going for the US title if any title at all. He could learn just as much from Jeff than he could from Bryan.

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14 minutes ago, Craig H said:

Anyway, Cass should be going for the US title if any title at all. He could learn just as much from Jeff than he could from Bryan.

This is a very good call. Plus, as we saw last week, Jeff can lose and not be diminished. Bryan can too but it's much trickier since he's still building since his return.

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