SummerSlam XXVIII

[Josh Mann]

Brock murders the timekeeper on Raw, is sent back to the Phantom Zone until Royal Rumble.

[HumanChessgame]

Tag match was great and Woods was absolutely killing it the whole time.  There need to be gifs of Kofi and Big E's victory dances asap

 

I'm pleasantly surprised there was no turn among Reigns and Ambrose.  If anything, it should have ended with Rowan coming back (if he's ready) and now the Wyatts are probably going to move down the card once again.

 

Lana and Ziggler needed to come to the ring in a red 88 Camaro with ttops.  I don't dislike Ziggler like most people do, but no one was being done any favors in this program, the women included.  This is probably going to end in a mixed tag match at the next show and hopefully Lana will turn on Ziggler so she and Russev can move onto something else.

 

Putting the title match in the middle of the show seemed really out of place.  The bout itself was alright, and the finish was ok in an "absurd pro wrestling bullshit that makes no sense, but still kind of works because it's so absurd" way, and that's coming from someone who can't stand Stewart's smug douchiness.  It does kinda make the open challenge thing moot, and it means that two titles are going to get tied up once again until Cena can win one or both of them back.

 

Divas match was such a stark contrast to the Takeover match.  I'm wondering if Sasha was hurt after her match with Bailey and if that's why her team went oyut so early.  It's not that there was anything overly bad about it, it was just short and meaningless and showed how outclassed the Bellas are.

 

Cesaro/Owens was great, but I think Cesaro should have gone over, him winning would have helped him more than it would Owens.

 

The main event was nothing bad, but the finish was idiotic.  I was expecting a fuck finish to set up a Mania rubber match, but this just crossed the line of belivability.

[piranesi]

Four way tag match was definitely one of the best of the night, everyone in it seemed to be crazy over, New Day immediately in the zone of having overshot heel heat back into massive babyface heat despite doing the cheap heat/deliberately bad singing combo

 

Isn't Lesnar not scheduled for Raw tomorrow? Potential spoilers about the guy who is already circulating

 

 

Is it

 

KEVIN SULLIVAN???? ZODIAC??? I FUCKING KNEW IT!

[Greggulator]

"Controversial ending to set up the rubber match for our Galactus vs. All of Earth's Heroes" and "run-in by the defining comedy news satirist of his generation who apparently wants to be the new Andy Kaufmann" are perfectly fine run-ins/endings. They lead to next chapters.  Everything else was settled cleanly and decisively. Totally fine. Work was solid-to-great throughout, too. Divas match was a bit of a mess but it's a three-way elimination match. They did the appropriate car wreck spots.

[pipGofern]

Man, the finishes on this show. So very bad...

 

That Taker-Brock match was pretty epic right up until the idiotic finish. If that was what they're Mania match was supposed to be, too bad Taker concussed himself first. Unless Taker joins the Corporation tomorrow this whole thing makes little sense. Well I guess they could be setting up a rubber match at Mania altho that seems like a waste of Brock.

 

Cena-Rollins was also really good up until the end. Rollins is pretty damn awesome. That was one of the worst telegraphed turns ever, too. Maybe Stewart got down to the ring too fast or something but Cena laying around while Stewart stood around waiting made the turn super-obvious. Up until then it was good and if Cena-Rollins for #16 is the title match at Mania that should be pretty good.

 

Really enjoyed the Arrow match. Amell is just doing this for fun and in about 5 minutes of ring action he already showed about a billion times more charisma and ring ability than those two goof finalists in Tough Enough. It never ceases to amaze me, tho, how actors look so big on their shows yet when they're in a ring next to even "small" guys like Cody they look like skinny jabronis.

[piranesi]

You know you guys had me so convinced that Dean was about to turn on Roman before the spear.  Goddamn you all. 

[The Man Known as Dan]

"Controversial ending to set up the rubber match for our Galactus vs. All of Earth's Heroes" and "run-in by the defining comedy news satirist of his generation who apparently wants to be the new Andy Kaufmann" are perfectly fine run-ins/endings.

 

*facepalm*

[SirSmUgly]

New Day getting that standing round of applause for their off-key, bastardized version of "Empire State of Mind" was one of my favorite things from all this year of pro wrestling. 

[Josh Mann]

Man, the finishes on this show. So very bad...

That Taker-Brock match was pretty epic right up until the idiotic finish. If that was what they're Mania match was supposed to be, too bad Taker concussed himself first. Unless Taker joins the Corporation tomorrow this whole thing makes little sense. Well I guess they could be setting up a rubber match at Mania altho that seems like a waste of Brock.

Cena-Rollins was also really good up until the end. Rollins is pretty damn awesome. That was one of the worst telegraphed turns ever, too. Maybe Stewart got down to the ring too fast or something but Cena laying around while Stewart stood around waiting made the turn super-obvious. Up until then it was good and if Cena-Rollins for #16 is the title match at Mania that should be pretty good.

Really enjoyed the Arrow match. Amell is just doing this for fun and in about 5 minutes of ring action he already showed about a billion times more charisma and ring ability than those two goof finalists in Tough Enough. It never ceases to amaze me, tho, how actors look so big on their shows yet when they're in a ring next to even "small" guys like Cody they look like skinny jabronis.

Clearly if you're serious into crossfit, it's half the battle won.

And Nevilles second rope moonsault might be even MORE impressive than Red Arrow

[hammerva]

Yeah this is about right

 

[JCM]

Could the finishes to the top two matches have been any worse? It's pretty bad when Kane interfering would've been better in both cases. Rollins/Cena was a fun spotfest that got a little no selly, and Brock/Taker was fucking awesome until WWE epicz overkill and that stupid fucking finish. Great effort by Taker and Brock. Seth got his new gear at a Jeff Jarrett garage sale.

 

New Day is the #1 and best, and the match was great. Shield vs Wyatts was another badass tag match. Becky, Charlotte and Sasha need to run(not walk) back to NXT that was an atrocious match layout. They tried to hide Sasha knowing she would be over.

 

I loved Cesaro/Owens but they were in the death slot on a 4 hour show. If that match happened early it would've tore the house down. Rusev/Ziggler was the worst Rusev match I've ever seen. Ziggler was terrible, and the whole thing was crap.

 

Tremendous in ring efforts by so many guys, but the main takeaway will be the shitty booking once again.

[Brian Fowler]

My favorite match was the 4-team tag. Everybody stepped it up tonite, and Xavier Woods' ranting was only second to Kofi's Hermes footware.

Those are actual Adidas shoes, BTW. Wings 3. They were $250(!!) when they were first released.

[Jiji]

So, they're running Jerryworld and their big two main events are two rematches from SummerSlam?

[Charlie M.]

I might be in the minority but Jon Stewart's WWE involvement cracks me up and Rollins still gave Cena a pedigree on the f'n chair after to pin him.

[Victator]

I am happy Taker won and do nor care how.

I think the Authority were responsible for the rogue time keeper. They need to keep Brock down and only Taker has a chance. If Taker won, he just returns to the ether. Brock wins and he goes after Rollins again. 

Surprised John Stewart is three feet tall and eighty. 

[piranesi]

I don't think Stewart is athletic enough to be the new Andy Kaufman.  I'll be amazed if we don't find out he's in surgery tonight for a torn rotator cuff from having to pick up that chair twice.

[Josh Mann]

Before we get ridiculous over comparing shows, it's important to note that Summerslam was booked like a Summerslam. Takeover was booked like NXT WrestleMania. Big difference.

[Firebreaker Chip]

Amell having the worst physique out of everyone in that match was kind of ridiculous

 

Barrett, Rhodes, Ziggler, Miz all kinda stuck with that "2010 future top guy" stink where it's now impossible to actually imagine them as main eventers in a post-Punk/Bryan world, the last survivors after Ted and Johnny Nitro got the fuck outta dodge

[Burgundy LaRue]

You know you guys had me so convinced that Dean was about to turn on Roman before the spear.  Goddamn you all. 

 

I suspect Reigns' MIA spot is going to become a point of contention for the two.  Ambrose took all the abuse, Reigns got the pin. That can easily be the spark to start the fire.

 

That said, I enjoyed the match.  Bodies flying, hard hitting, and they eventually meet again.

[piranesi]

 

You know you guys had me so convinced that Dean was about to turn on Roman before the spear.  Goddamn you all. 

 

I suspect Reigns' MIA spot is going to become a point of contention for the two.  Ambrose took all the abuse, Reigns got the pin. That can easily be the spark to start the fire.

 

 

Dean can't turn until after Roman slaps him, like Arn slapping Pillman.

[Charlie M.]

Amell having the worst physique out of everyone in that match was kind of ridiculous

 

Barrett, Rhodes, Ziggler, Miz all kinda stuck with that "2010 future top guy" stink where it's now impossible to actually imagine them as main eventers in a post-Punk/Bryan world, the last survivors after Ted and Johnny Nitro got the fuck outta dodge

 

Only my hockey subforum friends will get the reference but they're basically Oilers Rebuild 1.

[Josh Mann]

Amell having the worst physique out of everyone in that match was kind of ridiculous

Barrett, Rhodes, Ziggler, Miz all kinda stuck with that "2010 future top guy" stink where it's now impossible to actually imagine them as main eventers in a post-Punk/Bryan world, the last survivors after Ted and Johnny Nitro got the fuck outta dodge

At this point, they're not jumping ahead of Rollins, Reigns, Ambrose or Owens. It's simply not happening.

[mco543]

I liked the finish to Taker/Brock

 

Undertaker is old and desperate and to beat Brock he had to become a dirty, cheating, rat bastard motherfucker and completely abandon any pretense of honor. I liked it because this is a radically different direction for Taker, he's been the venerable, stalwart hero of the company, a man too legendary and respected by the audience to get booed, and now he's decidedly none of these things and Brock didn't expect him to throw it all away to win. It's been such a long time since Taker worked heel that I'm truly shocked they actually did it. You can't accurately compare this finish to the NXT finishes because NXT, more than anything, was graduation day for Sasha and Owens and that was about endings, SummerSlam is an ongoing story that won't play out until next year.

 

Taker vs Brock rubber match at Mania 32 in JerryWorld, Brock puts his career up against Taker's and Taker loses and hangs up the boots. 100,000 people.

 

No, Gregg didn't type this or hack my account, I just loved the finish and I'm highly intrigued by this massive change in Taker's character.

[Matt D]

Before we get ridiculous over comparing shows, it's important to note that Summerslam was booked like a Summerslam. Takeover was booked like NXT WrestleMania. Big difference.

 

The Bayley win, yes. Everything else, including the tag title match, no. 

 

Brock vs Taker is a way bigger "Bringing out the big guns" than the ladder match.

 

If Balor had WON the title there, maybe.

 

Unless it's NXT Wrestlemania XI. 

[hammerva]

I don't think Stewart is athletic enough to be the new Andy Kaufman.  I'll be amazed if we don't find out he's in surgery tonight for a torn rotator cuff from having to pick up that chair twice.

 

Not athletic enough to be Andy Kaufman is not something you want on your tombstone.