Sex Machine Gun

This is one of the bigger cuts amongst the thousands this promotion has inflicted on itself over the years. I don't know why, but they haven't been able to present a babyface effectively in ages. They can do heels all day and twice on Sunday but making anyone likable in a positive way is impossible. AEW has the same problem to a lesser extent but the strictly controlled and scripted nature of current WWE makes it much more obvious.

Not a lot of surprise here, though I do hope that Belair/Banks is the main event of night one. I also hope that each night clocks in at three hours. I figured Bad Bunny would be on the first night to entice potential viewers for night two.

It's as if they realized that if they booked Lashley as a monster it would get him over as a face with a live crowd at Wrestlemania. Not like I have a finger on the pulse of anything, but it feels like there's a lot more enthusiasm for Lashley right now compared to Drew at the same time in the Mania build. Granted, Lashley gets the luxury of holding the belt going into the event but I'm not seeing a lot of desire for Drew to be the conquering hero again this year.

Absolutely nothing made real sense tonight. Why make The Hurt Business break up? Why is there a Braun choo-choo? Why... Riddle? Fucking hell. I actually watched the whole show and outside of the Ripley/Asuka bit (since that at least seemed logical), I'm wondering why the fuck I even bothered.

Yeah, it's nice to hear about some facetime interactions. No idea what the rest of that dick waving shit was about but I'm glad both Britt and Wardlow sound happy with their positions.

I'll be honest, I've never watched a Rhea Ripley match or anything outside of Rumble appearances but her against Asuka is more exciting to me than Charlotte. Get well soon to Charlotte but there's a chance to make a new star here in Ripley. She's got a real presence and doesn't feel out of place being vaulted to the top of the Raw women's division. I'm most surprised that WWE acknowledged the pandemic again but I guess it was unavoidable like with McIntyre.

I hadn't thought about that idea and if anyone would be willing to sacrifice themselves for the sake of getting over the top guy, it's Bryan. It'll be incredible if they do it too, no way he'd go out in some underwhelming way.

Sweet Jesus, "pop culture extravaganza?" ? I was okay with "biggest event in all of entertainment" or whatever, but wow. What're you gonna do, have a dedicated Neckbeard live watch stream?

Just watched Reigns/Bryan in full rather than just highlights and I LOVED this. The first ten minutes or so were perfect. It looked legitimate, it looked like how a smaller but skilled wrestler would approach an arrogant sledgehammer of a champion, fucking awesome. Bryan is amazing as always but this match showed that Roman knows how to work too and has been in his position for so long for a reason. I was converted to the "Roman can work" camp back at Wrestlemania XXXI against Lesnar. He's not incredible but can be given the right, motivated opponent. Lesnar at Wrestlemania XXXIV was shook by the crowd reactions and if there's anyone whose effort can be dialled up or down like a switch, it's Beefy Brock. Anyway, this match showed why these two in a one-on-one at Wrestlemania was the way to go. Is this year a foregone conclusion? Roman's been dominating one of the two shows for months now, surely he loses in three weeks. Or does he? Do you want to have someone finally take this bad motherfucker down at Mania or do you keep up the domination until, say, SummerFest, er, SummerSlam? Would it have the same impact? I wish the triple threat at Mania was under elimination rules but if that were they case they'd probably job Bryan out in five minutes.

RIP "Slapjack," 2020-2021. We never really knew ye. I'll miss laughing every time someone says it out loud. I know they're telling Riddle to act high but in this moment with Nakamura he's bordering on disabled. Like, "he's on a scooter because he's not allowed to be issued a driver's license" disabled. He failed to notice that someone standing two feet away from him in an empty, quiet hallway had walked off. He's supposed to be a face but it's way too much. If I ignored that the Old Spice ad was part of a wrestling show it was kind of hilarious. Why has Seth Rollins bored me since he came back from his knee injury in 2016? Going on five years I haven't really cared about anything he's done and he's supposed to be one of their top guys! Sheamus and Drew did what I thought they'd do, and it was good. Drew's leg slap had to have been an accident. These workers have done these moves so many damn times it's probably hard to unlearn shit like that. These closeups of Fiend's hand coming out of the mat were ruined (besides the obvious ruining this whole fiasco has been) by seeing the commentary team in the background staring at their monitors instead of the supernatural thing happening RIGHT IN FRONT OF THEM Daniel Bryan is so awesome he didn't even need rebelling crowds to put him in the Wrestlemania main event this time. EDIT: This company is going to be fucked creatively for a little while when live crowds are back. Waaaaay too much reliance on us hearing what the wrestlers are saying during matches/angles to move things along right now.

I don't know how much activity there will be but I plan on being in the Discord, assuming the link from before is the general link for DVDVR chat. Stupid bullshit is so much better with others.

Given the stupid shit they like doing, I wouldn't be shocked if the Fiend character was suddenly called Pazuzu.

Vince's dream was a Hogan/R-Truth minstrel double feature. "Ohhhhhhh naw Mista Hogan, puh-leeeeeeeaze don't drop that leg on me! I was just wantin' ta innerdoose that bunny man!" Who do you see this company using for nostalgia pops in twenty years, assuming they're still around? Can you imagine an older Orton getting the same kind of feeling from fans that someone from the 80s or 90s booms might? This is the hazard of not making any fucking stars for so long. Cena's seriously the only guy, which was sadly by design for ten years. I suppose if the pro wrestling fanbase has been whittled down to the most hardcore of hardcore fans by then they'll pop for Styles or Bryan or something but those aren't people that would be recognized by those coveted casual or lapsed fans.

Will Hobbs only wrestles if you believe he wrestles. Otherwise he looks like a Wrestling Buddy to everyone else.

Okay, this will be out of order because I'm watching YouTube clips and can only ever guess at their actual timeline of events. Why is there a potential Jax/Baszler breakup being teased in the midst of an obvious Belair/Banks split and Wrestlemania feud? It's pretty dang obvious one of the two teams is going to break up at Fastlane so why complicate matters? Hulk Hogan broke kayfabe! BOOOOOOOO. You're from Venice Beach BROTHER, not Tampa. Titus came with the same spirit in his announcement promo. I'd love to hear Titus ask Hogan how his daughter's doing when they see each other. Forgetting all that goofery, why does Wrestlemania have a host? It's been going on for over a decade now and is usually so unobtrusive that you don't think about it except when Rock did it. The Rock and Kim Kardashian are the only ones I can think of who actually had relevance outside of wrestling. Actually, has every Wrestlemania had a guest host since 2008? What a weird gimmick. Vince loves doing shit no one will remember a month, let alone a year later. Cesaro/Nakamura/Rollins at Wrestlemania? If they cram all the strong style, indyriffic flips and kicks, and insane moves which get a two count into this match the the rest of the card will be great on the given night the match would take place. Big E beatdown, okay. Sami Zayn's character is so new and different to wrestling that it's jarring when he's talking to Kevin Owens. Sami's match against Corbin is called "the least anticipated match in Smackdown history." I'm sure there was some Gymini/Tensai+Kenzo match that had a greater nega-pop before. So they bury Sami then put over how he really did get over with someone "mainstream." At least Sami is great at playing whatever role they give him whether it be cowardly or heroic. CORBIN WON?? Fucking hell. I LOVE Roman laughing at the idea he'll get tapped out. Broken record but lord is he good right now. Obviously Bryan's mic work was incredible. Weird though how you hear "I hope you don't die" in a WWE promo. There's no way anyone looks forward to any match at Fastlane more than Reigns/Bryan. I'm already predicting a minimum **** masterpiece. Now that I've said this. there will be some stupid fucking finish with gimmicks that ruins it all. Nothing prevents these two from going out and having an amazing PPV match worthy of discussion among the greats but I can't trust WWE to not fuck around. Maybe Paul Heyman gets buried in cement. Edge's gear is ratchet. Too bright, too contemporary. Blue's cool but he looks like a fifty year old cosplaying as AJ Styles. I know Edge's moveset on WWF Attitude included the hurricanrana but I don't think it came up after early 1999. This was good though, even if I HATE THE SPEAR BEING USED BY PEOPLE WHO CAN'T DO IT

Nah. Fun coincedence though! Ever since someone mentioned her a week ago or whatever I've been listening (since her videos got murked to mere audio) to the takes as they happen and they're not terrible. I am indeed a lonely guy because of the pandemic but I listen because I want to hear how a fan in their early 20s (I'm guessing anyway) thinks about wrestling. Also, while I'm sure they exist I don't know of any other women's perspectives on YouTube. It feels like any time I've seen a woman brought on any channel as a contributor they vanish within a month or two tops to the point where I can even predict it before it happens. Some were better than others, just like men, but the men would always remain. I forgot about this! Shit, here I thought I had a new idea. Goddamn Dungeon of Doom repressing a lot of my old WCW memories.

I saw it not as an every week thing, but as a way to pop in once a month at most and resolve some shit that doesn't seem to have a way to resolve itself. Maybe an arbitrary panel more than authority figures, how's that? They wouldn't even be restricted to the main event shit because that would get old, it could be a way to get heated undercard feuds over mostly. It's Friday night and I'm blue skying right now, dammit!

Honest question, because I've always pondered this: how much overlap is there between MMA and wrestling? I remember when a lot of MMA coverage started bleeding into websites here and there and people on messageboards came to take a shine towards it but I've never once really thought of them as overlapping interests. Anyone I know who's into MMA, especially when I was in the Army, thought of wrestling as a joke from their younger years and liked it, past tense. Wrestling fans I know are into it sometimes at best. This could be a wrestling mark living in their own bubble and most likely is but no form of MMA has ever grabbed me. Not even pro wrestlers going into the sport made me want to watch, despite the high level of success some have obtained. I guess I look at MMA marks as largely Joe Rogan types (the stupid person's thinking man~) who don't give a fuck about wrestling and see it as an athletic gag. They aren't cross-shopping with AEW or WWE. Now then, forcing the actual PPV companies with making choices is a different matter. I have no idea what numbers UFC and other promotions do but I'd imagine they beat AEW and WWE by a healthy margin. Sadly, we can't think of boxing this way anymore unless it's some crossover or celebrity freakshow.

Elsewhere on the interwebs, someone suggested that after Andrade (likely) ends up in AEW then Charlotte/Ric Flair follow him at the same time. I'm very on board with this idea that'll never happen, but let's say Ric shows up. I'd love to see the Four Horsemen be the Jedi Council of AEW authority and be in charge of making matches, compromising on booking of their favored workers in stipulations/belt defenses, etc. We've had, at most, an executive figure and an underling with similar authority in wrestling, on a known scale, on TV, in the US, before anyone points out some random ass promotion did this once, but a panel? Heck, I'd be fine with a simple triumvirate of AA.Tully, and JJ. (checks Google) JJ is 78. Nevermind his participation. Either way, why not create a sort of psuedo-NWA-of-old committee that we sometimes see debating the virtues of their chosen people? It'd involve older people always who know how to talk and put people over. I guess what I'm saying is, I don't want Tony Khan on TV as a thing because it's gonna goddamn happen sooner than you think. (another Google check) Oh shit, he's a year older than me. I can't take fifteen years of SuperShane-esque shit if it happens. GIVE ME MY LEGENDS COUNCIL

****3/4 for the main event from Meltzer? Needs more Tokyo Dome. (I agree but only because to me ***** really needs to be reserved regardless of how he's gone over that before)

HOW DID I FORGET THIS SHIT WITH THE WORLD'S CHAMP Look, I get it, this whole Callis stable is meant to be a bunch of shitdick heels. Fine. I'd rather dislike them for their actual intended actions than things which aren't being directed by the narrative. The "no thigh slap" shirt was fucking atrocious. EVERYONE AROUND YOU DOES IT AND NO ONE POINTED OUT THE IRONY. See, THAT'S how you show a heel, point out hypocrisy, they respond like "whaaaaaa?? Meeeeee?? No, YOU AND ALL THESE PEOPLE ARE THE ASSHOLES" and no one did that. I am beyond disliking Kenny at this point, I don't like him being on the screen. Like, at all. Other than to get a chair into the ring for the angle, why wasn't there any followup on what appeared to be an idea for some promo he was going to cut while sitting in it. The main event heel stable is so unfocused and annoying that I POPPED FOR THE BUCKS DOING A RUN-IN because something interesting might happen. I appreciate their unusual restraint in not having the Bucks blast Callis and Kenny with superkicks but I honestly hate seeing any of them on TV at this point. EDIT: And where was the strap? Have your belt on TV! Fuck! Guess it was backstage with Christian's promo and how the fuck was his first promo not in front of an audience?

I actually looked for this last night given the scuttlebutt on here over the last couple of weeks and... wow. I need the Spanish word for "shoehorn" because that's all he was doing with his genuflecting last night. Even in close quarters where the cameras pick it up but the crowd doesn't (which I always thought was the real reason for vivid taunts) he was still doing it.

The only thing that killed the main event even 1% was Tony saying Rosa was crying after she won. I didn't notice if that was the case and just rewatched the YouTube clip they posted of the final 7-8 minutes. Let us enjoy knowing they put up a brawl that was beyond worthy of "for a women's match" caveats. This is my second favorite women's match behind the Bayley/Sasha IronMan. Everyone loves the Brooklyn match and it's awesome but I liked the IronMan more because of Sasha being the biggest shitty heel that ever heeled. But back to Britt/Rosa, I agree that Britt was talking about star ratings and making Jericho proud and shit because it was a candid segment. In the same few minutes she talked about her mother fondly, not really heel stuff. We almost saw Marko Stunt die. I can't stand that he's involved so much (RUGRATS GEAR, fuck me) but thank goodness whoever slowed down his fall did so. That was a real split second from at least paralysis. I went to the corner store and was gone for all of twenty five minutes (~9:10-9:35) yet managed to miss three segments apparently. I'm guessing Miro's being built as a bigger heel in his pairing with Kip, the latter of whom will likely be crushed into a small cube by the former in a couple of weeks. Totally missed the Darby stuff as well as Brian Cage teasing a face turn. Missed a Scorpio Sky thing too. Sheesh. I WASN'T GONE THAT LONG YET THE WHOLE MIDCARD DID SHIT Can someone please clue me in on why everyone shits on Shawn Spears? I don't think I've even seen him wrestle on TV in a year and can't remember at all if he's any good. He hasn't gotten any promo time and they've barely remembered he had Tully working with him. In terms of visibility and record he's the weakest member of the Pinnacle sure, but in my eyes I see him that way because I have absolutely nothing to work with. He hasn't been doing anything! Still, he's got good size, looks like a threat in a promotion of sub-6' guys, and has one of the best mouthpieces working for him. I don't get it. He could very well suck but there's so little data from which I can draw. I never watched him in NXT or anything. Way I see it, that motherfucker already won the game by marrying Peyton Royce. Why should I be making unflattering comparisons to Mongo or Roma or whateverthefuck?

The main event was so good I forgot about THIS pile of bullshit. It wasn't even a rollup, it was a damned sunset flip position. Someone please tell me why Cody's someone I should cheer. No! No! No negativity! Not until tomorrow! I loved the main event and the PINNACLE~ promo was great.

Easily the most violent women's match I've personally watched but they were GOING for it, with submissions and pinning reversals IN THE BED OF TACKS. That's some hatred, Britt lost nothing by jobbing here, both are stars now. It took a bloodbath but we finally got an AEW women's match that's going to be on the highlight reels for years.