NXT RETRO WORKRATE REPORT – APRIL 10, 2013
(by PHIL RIPPA)
So fucking behind. I had planned on cranking a few of these out during the Winter Break but I broke the W key off my laptop and I wasn’t trying to write one on my iPad so I delayed and delayed. I mean doing a “W”orkrate Report on “W”restling was going to be a challenge. Though at some point I am going to have to accept that challenge and see how creative I can get.
Holy Shit – the hype video for the Regal/Ohno match is off the charts great. My favorite part (which I missed last time) is that Regal clearly gets a shot in on Tony Dawson as he is going after Ohno. I am also including Ohno’s promo here since he does it while wearing a Regal’s Man’s Man T-shirt. I am also including the fact that Regal cuts an amazing promo that everyone should watch that ends with him begging his kids for forgiveness for the beating he is going to give Ohno. Plain and simple – this match had the best build that I have seen the WWE do in a long long time.
IT IS FINALLY HERE!!! WILLIAM REGAL VS. KASSIUS OHNO!!!! Now, as I mentioned a couple of weeks ago, this match was probably the only NXT I had watched before I started doing these workrate reports. Plus it was a request by someone who donated to the site (which you can still do – we have Paypal and everything! Send me a message!) I already know that I love this match and for now it is the Gold Standard of NXT Matches*. There is no real way to do the match justice outside of watching it but I will just say that I fucking LOVED the psychology that Regal was trying to lead a different life, atone for his sins and that Ohno – who had grown up idolizing the old Regal – was disgusted by it. Of course, Ohno’s actions unlocked the demons that Regal had tried to hide away and they all come out in a vicious fury. Ohno, while clearly too pudgy for Triple H, can easily work well with Regal and they base an entire 15 minute match around ears and fingers which is outstanding. Oh BTW, the finish is #1 and the best. Fuck – I have always loved Regal but this match alone might have moved him into my #2 spot**.
Cool a Shield match. I mean they are just crushing the usual NXT jobbers… which included Percy Watson. Poor poor no longer employed Percy Watson. This was fun for the beating the Shield dishes out. Plus Alex Keegan has some nice looking punches. This also had what appears to be the start of a Corey Graves face time. That I am not necessarily down with that but if it takes Roman Reigns punching Graves in the face a lot while on the way to said face turn, then I am cool with it.
I am simpleton so the Renee Young/Emma segment had me rolling. That’s right! You Kids and Your Electric Slide! Get Off My Lawn!
The self-aggrandizing videos the WWE does are really hit and miss. All of us have grown to expect them so it is just a matter of subject material and how they are put together. The one shown on this episode recaps the Mania week festivities and it is a fun watch partly because, say what you will, it is really great to see fans getting one of a kind opportunities. I think my favorite was the girl losing her shit when she got Mania tickets because she found Kaitlyn at a random store in the Garden State Plaza. Also – Joe Buck hosted some sort of auction and Buck and the WWE seems like the most perfect match ever.
The problem with Regal wrestling means they had to scramble for an announce crew – and that meant Tom Phillips and Brad Maddox. That would be your definition of dumpster fire. I mean the first match alone they messed up the names of three of the guys in the ring AND their own names. That is a special type of suck. A special type of suck that did its best to ruin Regal/Ohno.
HOLY FUCK! Tony Dawson can’t even do a backstage interview properly. THE MIC GOES IN FRONT OF YOUR MOUTH TONY!!!!
An entire development roster full of ladies trying to get a shot and yet I have to sit through the Funkadactyls vs. Bellas. Since this was taped in front of the very very college crowd – the match was full of offense that was very butt based to keep them interested. Good lord – with how sloppy these four are, I am shocked they each haven’t suffered more concussions. This is a waste except it made me notice the giant Blonde that they have doing the ring intros now. I am assuming eventually I will learn her name.
* Pulling from just the pool I have seen so far. I know I got some classics still to come (including more with Regal). And Langston/Rollins is #2. Heck, it might be 1A – it is just a totally different type of match. And your mileage will definitely depending on how much you factor crowd reactions into your opinion.
** God – that comes off as sounding as if Regal moved into my ass. Which isn’t what I meant at all and I think you know what I was going for. That being said – I would think long and hard if the offer of Regal violating my #2 spot was presented to me.