SirSmUgly Posted September 11 Author Share Posted September 11 11 hours ago, zendragon said: I had no Idea that DDP was like Miro in that he appears to only be interested in doing angles where other guys fuck his wife It feels like his last multi-month feud against someone that didn't involve Kimberly being harassed or lusted after was the Raven feud in early 1998. The Bischoff/Hogan feud in the summer - harassing Kim was part of the build The Goldberg feud - only one month The Giant feud - only one month The Scott Steiner feud - Scotty tries to fuck Kim for like three or four months The Nash feud - only one month The Flair(s) feud - based around Ric and Dave stalking Kim The Buff feud - hopefully done after a month, but if not, based on Buff and Kim maybe possibly fucking. Page will always have the October Goldberg feud and the April 1999 title run(s), but otherwise, his booking went right downhill after he got out of the Raven feud. 2 hours ago, twiztor said: OTOH, maybe the lack of Russo will lend itself to the wrestlers having more time and less interference, so they just get to do what they're actually good at.....wrestling. i mean, i wouldn't hold my breath, but to me, that seems like a logical way to handle your head writer suddenly not being involved. I think this would be more tempting if not for the fact that Russo left the show with a bunch of feuds that don't promise to make for good matches. Oklahoma/Madusa, the Hardcore Championship scramble, DDP/Buff, Booker/Stevie...Yuck. The Revs/Kidman and Konnan match will theoretically be decent, I suppose. Jarrett/Benoit x3 should be good, though who knows if that happens since Benoit gets bumped into a title match. Likewise, Bret and Sid would be a good pairing, but at least Benoit and Sid will also be good. The undercard is in complete shambles, though, and none of these pairings look like they'll make for good matches at all. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirSmUgly Posted September 12 Author Share Posted September 12 Souled Out 2000 notes: It’s the first post-Russo era in WCW and the last Souled Out! It makes no sense that they’d keep the Souled Out branding into 2000; it came about because the nWo held their own PPV in 1997. This show is branded as WCW Souled Out. That makes no damn sense. Ah, Bret Hart and Jeff Jarrett are both hurt. They show WATCH THE KICK, though they should also show the ringpost Figure Four. Then, they show Benoit injuring Jarrett with the diving headbutt. That looked like it hurt Benoit more, honestly. I vaguely remember Jarrett saying that Snuka’s splash did him in, now that I’ve been told he’s hurt. I think I actually knew that he missed this show somewhere in the recesses of my brain. In the pre-show, the Revolution jump Konnan and put him out of the show, which explains the Dean Malenko/Billy Kidman thing; they’re getting shifted into the Triple Threat Theatre Match. Kidman, as the lone remaining Filthy Animal, will fight three Revolution members across all three matches. It’ll be Kidman/Malenko in the (very short) Dungeon/Catch-as-Catch-Can Match, Kidman/Saturn in a Bunkhouse Brawl, and Kidman/Mystery Wrestler in the Caged Heat Match. It's also apparent that Nash is winning this match against Terry Funk. Commissioner Nash sounds horrible. People don’t talk enough about how all this WCW President/Commissioner stuff is a drag on the shows and how all these matches to pass executive power between wrestlers is completely uncompelling and meaningless. I go back to WCW President Ric Flair being booked into a Four Corners match with Randy Savage as the referee by some unnamed WCW exec with more power than him. That was the point at which all this executive position crap was rendered pointless in storyline. In fact, if the point of Terry Funk being commissioner is that Brad Siegel had the power to hire him specifically to tame the nWo, why would Siegel a) let Funk put the position on the line against an nWo member, or b) not just immeditely fire Nash as commissioner if Funk loses anyway? These storylines fucking SUCK, man, they’re awful and shitty and there’s no logic to any of them. Crowbar, David Flair, and Daffney beat up Vampiro in the back, so now the match is between all those dudes except for Daffney, who will just be standing around at ringside. They run down these matches and the rest of the card. This card is noxious. Holy shit, is this going to be worse than BatB ’99? I’m on “worst WCW PPV ever” alert right now. In fact, we’ll just compare these cards directly as I review this show. Billy Kidman opens the show against Dean Malenko. This match is wrestled under Dungeon rules and therefore ends if one of the wrestlers touches the floor (along with ending via pinfall or submission). Malenko wins a shoulderblock, and in fact, he ducks between the ropes twice instead of bailing, so good for him. It’s just that a heel bailing from the ring to stem the tide of a babyface's offense is such a natural reaction that the third time, Malenko rolls out of the ring to avoid a barrage of Kidman punches. Tony S. calls the match ending about a half-minute before ref Charles Robinson realizes what happened and duly calls the bout in favor of Kidman. You can tell by the look on his face that Malenko feels like a real doofus for just a second before he snaps back and yells at Robinson theatrically. On one hand, it’s impressive that this match made me laugh more than a match with two solid comedy workers in Ernest Miller vs. Disco Inferno. On the other hand, this was a legendarily disappointing opener because of Malenko’s error. ADVANTAGE: BATB ’99. Recap: Flair and Crowbar feud with Vampiro, who really did ask for it by harassing Daffney when she was minding her own damn business. Okerlund interviews Vampiro when Masahiro Chono just randomly cuts in and rants in Japanese (?!?). After that, the only interesting act in the midcard right now - David Flair, Crowbar, and Daffney - have a deranged little interview with Okerlund in a different location. Vampiro comes to the ring. Is Chono going to be interjecting himself into this match, or like what [Editor's note: Nope. That rant was never mentioned again]? Crowbar and Flair attack one another, then attack Vampiro, but Vamp hits a double-facebuster. I see that they made this a triple threat because Dave still sucks at doing pro wrestling by himself for long periods of time. This is mostly a Vampiro/Crowbar rematch from Nitro with David Flair popping into the proceedings occasionally. They proceed to have a perfectly okay match. Vampiro and Crowbar hit dives and suplexes and basically work a solid match. Davey pops up and tries to jump Vampiro, who no-sells his shit. Davey tries to get Crowbar to help him, but Vamp kicks Crowbar and then shows Davey how to really chop a dude. Vampiro dumps Davey next to Crowbar at ringside and then lands a baseball slide. He tries to uranage Dave and Crowbar hits that spot where he somersault sentons onto both of them. Crowbar goes back to work on Vamp, eventually landing a running splash from the apron to the floor. The crowd chants that DAVID SUCKS. Well, except for that one fan in the front row with the DAVID FLAIR IS MY IDOL sign. Pretty much, the story is that when Vampiro easily beats up human traffic cone David Flair, sometimes he gets too locked in and gives Crowbar a chance to jump him. Crowbar is able to do so and land a slingshot guillotine legdrop for two, but Vamp is able to stop Crowbar’s flow of offense and hit a superplex for two of his own before David Flair drags him off the cover and stomps him. That gives Dave and Crowbar some extended control; Crowbar slams Davey onto Vamp for two; then, Dave gets up and hits a vertical suplex for two. Vamp badly botches his attempt to pull a Kidman (a facebuster reversal on a powerbomb attempt); the ECW fans in the crowd briefly chant YOU FUCKED UP. Vamp makes his comeback and drills Crowbar with a uranage for two, but Flair boots him, and that leads to Crowbar hitting a top-rope splash for two, but pulling off the cover and letting Davey Flair put a Figure Four on Vamp. Crowbar then hits a splash to cover while Vamp is still in the Figure Four, but Davey pulls him off. They fight amongst one another; Dave hits Crowbar with a back suplex, then makes out with Daffney. Vampiro sneaks up behind Dave and rolls him up for two. This is a dumb, convoluted finish. The spirit of Russo is in the building. Vamp hits Crowbar with a powerbomb, then dodges a Flair charge when Daffney distracts him. Davey crashes into Daffney; Vampiro catches David off the whiff and hits a Nail in the Coffin for three. Uh, shouldn’t Vampiro be the tag champs, basically? This match was actually enjoyable at points, unlike – hurk – Rick Steiner’s extended squash of Van Hammer. ADVANTAGE: SOULED OUT ’00. The Mamalukes promise the fans at home that they’ll take care of the Harris Boys and that Disco had better be there to back them up in their pre-match interview with Okerlund. YUCK, the Harris Boys versus the Mamalukes (w/Disco Inferno) sounds like hell. This is like the most early-2000 WCW midcard matchup there is. Complete aimless mediocrity while the competition on the other channel can produce fun midcard matches with teams who are actually over, like Too Cool or the Dudley Boys. Anyway, this is a complete borefest that is partially worked around the Mamalukes trying to get Disco to interfere and Disco resisting. Vito does an AWFUL junk-thrusting elbow to the balls that is a spot which makes me re-think my love of pro wrestling. All these dudes doing People’s Elbow style spots that suck because of the Rock's influence is amazing. The Worm is the only other move of that type that really got over in a big way. This match goes on forever and is, I suppose, competently if dully worked for the most part. That’s the best thing I can say about it. The Harris Boys work like heels, so there’s not really an effective hot tag. A small BORING chant fires up, so I’m not alone in my thinking. Disco eventually intervenes by shoving Vito off the top rope and right into a weak diving clothesline that hits Ra/oD and gets three. Awful finish. Davey Flair/Malenko at BatB was dumb, but at least it was short. This was long and bad. I really can’t pick one over the other, though. The comparison is between two bad matches that are bad in somewhat different ways. ADVANTAGE: PUSH. Madusa yammers on to Spice about how shitty dealing with Oklahoma is before they walk to the ring for… …this fucking Cruiserweight Championship match between Madusa (w/Spice) and Oklahoma. Oklahoma insists on doing some boring and crappy chauvinistic mic work before the match. He mentions Ms. Magazine, Gloria Steinem, Sarah McLachlan, and Ally McBeal. That’s not all the same white American woman in my experience. Those are white American women with some overlap, but very different in a lot of ways. I didn't know many white American flower girls who loved Lilith Fair and also never missed an episode of Ally McBeal. Anyway, Madusa comes out here dressed like a jackass with her dumb looking trunks and kicks Oklahoma a lot, who responds with hair-assisted beals. They do an awkward looking corner charge spot in the corner that ends with Madusa headbutting him in the balls. This goes on too long, and it’s not as long as the previous match. Nash started murdering the prestige of this belt, but I guess we’re just going to pile dirt on the corpse here. Anyway, Oklahoma goes for the bottle of barbecue sauce, but Spice takes it away; Asya runs down and helps Spice attack Oklahoma. They toss him into the ring, where for some reason Madusa turns her back on Oklahoma so he can yank her stupid tights down and then score a sloppy schoolboy for three. The ladies sauce Oklahoma after the match. I mean, do I even need to extensively compare this to – let’s see – the No Limit Soldiers/West Texas Rednecks elimination match? That last one was at least a decent enough Survivor Series-style bout. ADVANTAGE: BatB ’99. New Hardcore Champion Brian Knobbs is given mic time with Gene Okerlund for some fucking reason. Knobbs yells. I don’t care. Here we go with this Four the Hard Way Match, which is just a Four Corners Hardcore Match. Funny enough, it’s located in the same spot on the card as the Junkyard Invitational on BatB’s card. I guess this is easier to watch because it’s not shrouded in the dying light of the day? It’s also shorter than the Junkyard Match. There are a bunch of shitty weapon spots. It’s the same thing every time. Knobbs hits a diving Smiley with a riot shield to retain. I mean, they were both bad matches, even if this was shorter. This match was still too long. ADVANTAGE: PUSH. Billy Kidman is back in the ring to face Saturn in this Bunkhouse Brawl. OK, the match just before this one was full of weapon shots, so they need to avoid having a match full of weapon shots in this Bunkhouse Brawl. Jarrett always works them like straight weapons spotfests. So, the good news is that they do wrestle this in a completely different way to the previous match. The bad news is that there is nothing bunkhouse-y nor brawl-ish about this match. They work it like a straight match except with a table spot in there. This is a perfectly acceptable Nitro match, but it’s not a Bunkhouse Brawl. It’s pretty disappointing from that perspective, honestly. Anyway, they tease the table being broken before a trade of offensive moves ends in a two count for Saturn off a Savage Elbow. They go back to trading pinfall attempts before Saturn tries a powerbomb, avoids a facebuster counter, and then lands his second powerbomb attempt on Kidman. Elite shit! He misses a moonsault, and Kidman starts to fire off his signature moves for two. Finally. Kidman tries a rebound bulldog and gets release belly-to-belly’d over the top and through the table. Saturn goes out there and pins Kidman, but only for two. Saturn puts Kidman in the ring and takes his time going up top; he gets caught and awkwardly back body dropped to the ground. Saturn is up first, tries another powerbomb, and gets countered into a facebuster for three. This was better than the Jersey Triad tag that was way overbooked on BatB, even if it didn’t fit the bill of a Bunkhouse Match and had exactly zero bloody punches. ADVANTAGE: Souled Out ‘00. Video: Stevie went back around to the neighborhood. It looks nothing like Harlem circa the year 2000. If there’s a company that I don’t trust to do a “Booker has turned his back on working-class black people” angle with heel Stevie, it’s the WWF. If there’s another company that I don’t trust to do it, it’s WCW. I do actually find it funny, though, that Stevie has accurately captured the crab-in-a-barrel mentality that just because Booker is aspirational and might actually do something for himself, all of a sudden, that means that he has turned his back on the black folks he grew up with. Stevie follows up by cutting a quick promo with Okerlund in which he says the footage that just played speaks for itself. Meanwhile, Booker T. (w/Midnight), confounding new ring outfit) hits the ring first and says that actually Stevie Ray has forgotten how to be a good brother and, in fact, he’s done trying to be nice to this dude. Then, he sends Midnight to the back because he wants to settle this thing with Stevie on his own. Now, if Booker T. just won this match and moved on, cool. But at some point Stevie hooks up with J. Biggs and Booker has to change his name back to G.I. Bro and join the Misfits in Action, and that is terrible. We’re six months away from Booker being used like he should, but instead of a nice little four month U.S. Championship run before he faces Jeff Jarrett at Bash at the Beach, we get this nonsense. Anyway, there are a couple of obligabrawls in this match, which generally is perfectly cromulent, but has a lid on its quality because Stevie Ray is Stevie Ray. At one point, Stevie works a chinlock that Booker sells as painful and works hard to get out of, but the close camera shot shows how loose and weak the chinlock is in the first place. You see my point from that example, I hope. That was a Bam Bam Bigelow-level chinlock from Stevie. I hope that we eventually come back around from the current general belief that Booker actually wasn’t that good; he just looked good when standing next to Stevie to the correct position of Booker was really good and a viable spot main eventer at the very worst soon here on the ol’ internet. And I do think that if WCW were still a Southern-based wrestling promotion that lived into the mid-aughts, Booker would be a perfectly useful main eventer who wouldn’t necessarily be THE GUY, but who’d be ONE OF THE GUYS in support to Goldberg as THE GUY. Anyway, Ahmed Johnson chugs his way down here while Tenay, in what Michael Cole would call a VINTAGE TENAY moment, yells I KNOW WHO THAT IS. You’d think Ahmed Johnson would have more understanding for Booker after the Nation of Domination targeted him for having some dreams and achieving them (like becoming the first black Intercontinental Champion). But no! He’s perpetuating a cycle of hating black excellence because he’s petty. The match is thrown out while the beatdown culminates in Ahmed landing a Pearl River Plunge; Midnight runs down, but can’t do much to help Book. Ahmed is known as Big T., and he’s got a Big Gut. That shirt is not flattering, seriously. Stevie and Ahmed as a tag team seems pretty fun…if this were 1996. Alas, it is the year 2000. Anyway, I looked over at what this match opposed – the semi-main with Piper and Buff in the boxing match. This match had no finish and promises a terrible feud to come. That match had a finish – a pinfall finish in a boxing match that was won by Judy Bagwell. I can’t pick. I won’t pick. ADVANTAGE: PUSH. My man Sid is going to be the world champ soon, though not tonight. I cannot wait. He cuts a fiery promo about winning the WCW World Championship even though it’s been tarnished by all these nWo monkeyshines. So, what’s left tonight before our main event: Ah, Tank Abbott vs. Jerry Flynn; DDP vs. Buff Bagwell; Billy Kidman vs. Mystery Dude; Terry Funk vs. Kevin Nash. OK, I’m going to collectively compare them this to whether or not I’d rather have watched them or the last four matches of BatB before the main event of that shows I listed them here, which were: The WTR/NLS eight-man elimination tag, the Junkyard Invitational, Jersey Triad vs. Saturn and Chris Benoit, and Roddy Piper vs. Buff Bagwell. So, Jerry Flynn getting featured matches on PPV in 2000 is some wild stuff. He and Tank Abbott have a zero of a shoot fight. I’ve seen UWFi. I’ve seen RINGS. This was like if UWFi or RINGS was very bad. I could be watching Volk Han or someone like that instead. The only good thing about it is that it’s short. Abbott wins with a KO punch. Recap: DDP and Buff fight over Kimberly, also fight over the sizes of their respective penises. Next: DDP and Buff continue their fight over Kimberly, also continue fight over the sizes of their respective penises. This is a Last Man Standing Match that immediately spills through the crowd and into a tarped off section of the stands. They have a brawl that they intend to be heated, but all of this feels unearned. They come back to ringside. At some point, Tenay exclaims, “The honor of [DDP's] wife Kimberly is at stake!” This is the year 2000, Tenay. I don’t think Page is fighting for the honor of his fair maiden. We're not pinning an "A" on her chest if she banged Buff. Buff has one of the worst swinging neckbreakers in the business. Awful. It’s so loose. He basically makes his opponent bump himself. I know that this isn’t DDP’s fault because Buff always throws that shitty neckbreaker and his opponent always has to bump himself. They do a Superman/Doomsday spot in front of the internet stand, then do some weak work while teasing a spot that ends up being…two guys grabbing computer monitors and clashing them together. That was not exactly a spot driven by unbridled excitement. Well, someone had better at least go through this table. Page cracks a keyboard over Buff’s back. Buff comes back and drops an elbow on Page through the table, so at least we got something decent out of this foray to the internet table. Then again, Page quickly gets up from the impact and attacks Buff as Buff sells an elbow injury from the drop, so it didn’t mean much. This thing makes it back to the ring, and I already feel that it’s overlong. This hasn’t felt like a heated brawl, and the flow of this match has stunk. Some dudes chant D-D-P; the ladies cheer for Buff. We’ve had almost no ten counts from Slick Johnson, so this feels more like a typical hardcore match than a Last Man Standing Match. There’s nothing much to differentiate this match, though finally toward the end, Slick counts two standing ten-counts to remind us that this isn’t just another hardcore bout. We get a third standing ten-count from Slick after a single-arm underhook DDT that Buff lands on Page. In fact, it’s only in the last four or so minutes that we get these ten counts. What a poorly laid-out match. Buff lands a Blockbuster. Page gets up at nine, so Buff pulls out a police baton and beats Page back down to the mat. In a TERRIBLE looking spot, Buff turns his back on Page for no reason so that Page can stumble up, back into him, and hit a Diamond Cutter. If Buff were at least celebrating as Buff is wont to do, maybe I could have bought that he would stand there with his back turned, but he just stood there specifically to position himself for this spot. Then, Buff gets up first any-damn-way and wins the match while Kimberly marches out here. Buff turns toward Kim and talks to her as Page jumps Buff with the police baton and thwaps him with it after the match. Kim looks bummed about this whole thing. She looks how I feel because this stunk. I think I’d rather watch Piper/Buff and the Jersey Triad tag both than that last match, honestly. At least Judy Bagwell getting over as a babyface was funny and entertaining in its own way. Billy Kidman hits the ring for his third match, in the cell (Caged Heat = Hell in a Cell) against, uh, we’ll find out from Shane Douglas. Douglas, just name Kidman’s opponent and shut the fuck up. OK, it’s THE WALL, BROTHER, who was last seemingly a babyface after shedding Berlyn and shaking hands with Sid. Whatever. There’s a cap on this match because TW,B isn’t any good. They do some chair shots and stuff. TW,B tosses Kidman into the cage. It’s fine, but this only works as a match if there’s some heat to the matchup. Jarrett and Benoit? They had heat. Kidman and Saturn or Malenko? They had less heat, but I could squint and get there with them on this one. But TW,B and Kidman is meaningless. Also, once Kidman stops getting tossed into cage walls and the match gets back in the ring, it gets very dull. At least it’s short! Kidman does hit a sunset flip powerbomb that probably deserved more of a pop, but again, this match has no heat. Kidman turns a chokeslam attempt into a Latino Frankensteiner and goes up for an SSP, but TW,B gets up as Kidman steadies himself; Kidman jumps right into a goozle and a chokeslam for three. Recap: Kevin Nash vs. Terry Funk is a match that I didn’t remember ever happened. I wonder if Nash will give as much to Terry Funk in this hardcore bout as he gave to Hardcore Hak in that one hardcore bout they had on Thunder. There are a lot of bad signs held by fans in the aisle, and I say that because Nash and Funk brawl there to start, but the one sign I dig is a NOW HIRING sign from Burger King that someone is waving around. Nash puts Funk through the announcer’s table like it’s Good Friends, Better Enemies all over again, but it happens like a minute into the match. Then, Nash gets a mic and crows about it. He says that if Funk crawls back in the ring, he’ll let him keep the commissionership. Funk does his goofy wobbling sell, makes it back to the ring, and then is informed that Nash is a “lying son of a bitch,” followed by Nash laying knees in. This is basically a competitive squash that Funk blades himself in. Seriously, I think Nash’s Thunder match against Hak is clearly better than this match, and it’s not particularly close. That felt far more like a competitive match in which Nash was three levels above his opponent, but he was at a disadvantage because of the match type, than this match did. Funk taps Nash’s sack and tries a comeback; Nash gets a chair, hits a few shots to Funk’s head, and eventually Jackknifes Funk onto two seated chairs for the pinfall. What a dud. I’d honestly rather watch the four BatB matches leading up to the main event again over watching the four Souled Out matches leading up to the main event again. WTR/NLS is the best of any of the matches in the Souled Out grouping, and I’m not sure the Junkyard Invitational is appreciably worse than either the LMS or the Funk/Nash Hardcore Match. I mean, Funk/Nash was worse than a random Nash/Hak Hardcore Match on Thunder. That’s shameful. ADVANTAGE: BatB ’99. Alright, we’re at the main event. Scott Hudson talks to a disappointed Arn Anderson, who is not happy that Terry Funk won’t be commissioner anymore as of midnight. Those last three words, “as of midnight,” are important; Nash can’t interfere with the main event. Arn cuts a decent promo and plays off stumbling over his words as being shaken by the results of the previous match. Chris Benoit hits the ring for his WCW swan song against Sid Vicious. It’s almost certainly going to be better than Saturn’s WCW swan song. I don’t think we need to suggest a comparison between it and Malenko’s WCW swan song. Sid daps dudes on his way out. I, for one, would prefer him to be champ. I know, “Benoit deserves it” according to the internet crowd at the time, but there a SID chant in the crowd and Sid is a charisma machine who powerbombs people. Michael Buffer is in the ring for this one; he introduces the special guest ref and hits a LET’S GET READY TO RUMBLE before he introduces Benoit and Sid. Michael Buffer’s Ring Announcing Quality Control: Benoit is the master of the “Crippler.” No mention of the “Crossface” part of that move. Also, Sid hasn’t been WCW World Heavyweight Champion before, but Buffer is apparently convinced that he has been. OK, this is the sort of sloppy work that Buffer was known for by the end of WCW’s run. Right after Sid and Benoit lock up, Perry Saturn and David Flair hit the top of the ramp to watch the match. Okay. Sid and Benoit take note of that before Sid goozles Benoit and just shoves him over the top rope. OK, the whole locker room is out here to watch this match. I don’t buy that this collection of people give that much of a shit about WCW or these two competitors or anything like that, but sure, I get it, WCW booking is trying to give Benoit the royal treatment. Sid overpowers Benoit in the early going. He stalks Benoit after a press slam and hooks him for a vertical suplex, then ignores Benoit firing a desperate punch at his stomach and release front suplexes him. Sid shoots Benoit in, which is a mistake as it allows Benoit to use his speed and agility. Benoit ducks a lariat, gets a couple of low dropkicks in to Sid’s leg, and starts to work Sid’s knee. Benoit immediately tries to destroy Sid’s leg, dragging him to the floor, sandwiching Sid’s leg between the steps and the post, and hitting a pair of dropkicks into the steps. This isn’t an obligabrawl since it actually makes sense as a part of Benoit’s ruthless targeting of Sid’s leg. Sid struggles to win a punch-up with Benoit since he can’t brace himself to wind back, and Benoit wins that one before rolling Sid back in for two. Looking for a quick finish, Benoit sinks in a Figure Four. Sid fires up and uses his upper body strength to turn the hold; he keeps his legs locked and forces Benoit to eek his way to the ropes. Benoit is up first and goes back at the knee, stomping it and throwing a chop and a low dropkick to the head in besides. This is excellent targeted offense, and Sid is doing a nice job of selling the damage. Benoit backs Sid into the corner and kicks at his knee, then Dragon Screws Sid out of the corner and covers for two more. Benoit traps Sid in the corner again and lands a couple of loud chops. Sid blocks a whip by pulling his hand away, so Benoit opts for a snap suplex and an elbowdrop; Sid powers out just before two. Sid tries to fight up from his knees, but just can’t get enough leverage on his punches to win control. He rises, but Benoit dropkicks his knee, then wraps on an Indian Deathlock/bridging chinlock combo on Vicious. That doesn’t get a submission, so Benoit decides that he needs to damage the knee a bit more and releases the hold. He goes back to strikes and eventually hits a baseball slide to the leg that knocks Sid to the floor. Sid fans fucking love the guy and always give us memorable moments when encouraging him. Obviously, the entrance at MSG during Survivor Series 1996 is the most famous one, but this one that happens next is also often posted on the internet: Sid tries to help himself up by the guardrail as one Cincinnatian wearing a baseball cap holds Sid’s hand to help him up while yelling C’MON SID, YOU CAN DO IT, KICK HIS ASS. That RULED. Now, I’m fired up. Sid makes it back to the ring while the guy yells C’MON SIDDDDDDD in the background, and the best part is that Sid starts no-selling Benoit’s strikes and gets to his feet, then slaps the shit out of Benoit in the bargain. Might I interest you in the argument that Sid’s timing on his babyface comebacks is often very good? Benoit weathers that storm and takes Sid’s knee out with another basement dropkick. He throws a series of kicks at Vicious, but Sid catches one and throws a punch to Benoit’s abs. Sid tries to follow with a wild haymaker, but Benoit ducks it, then hits a rolling German. He attempts to hang on and roll through for another, but Sid back elbows his way out of trouble. Benoit is quick to throw a boot to the gut; he tries to shoot Sid in, but gets reversed and powerslammed on the rebound for two. Sid keeps trying to get to standing, but Benoit scissors the leg and locks on a leg bar. This match is very good. The right finishing run will push this from the Good/Great Matches list to the Favorites list. Sid survives, sits up, gets some energy from the crowd, and finally grabs the ropes to cause a break. However, he’s so hobbled that he can’t quickly move, so Benoit hits a release German and then goes up for a diving headbutt. Sid’s way the hell across the ring, but that doesn’t matter to Benoit, who lands it for one…two…and Sid presses him across the ring to kick out. Benoit tries to attack again, but rushes right into a goozle and gets chokeslammed with authority. Sid falls back because of his leg and takes time to get over for the cover, so Benoit is able to stick his foot under the ropes at two. Sid tries to pick Benoit up for a move, but Benoit grabs Sid’s arm and transitions into a Crippler Crossface for the tap as the cameraman zooms in on Sid’s leg being way under the ropes and damn near hanging off the apron. Honestly, the reaction is subdued. I think Cincinnati wanted Sid to win that one, honestly. I actually think this match needed three or four more minutes for more near falls before the finish, but it was a great match if not a GREAT MATCH, as I often ALL CAPS for emphasis. Still, I’m not surprised these two put together an excellent match, and Sid was absolutely not a passenger, either. Tony S. puts Benoit over on commentary before we go back to Okerlund interviewing Benoit directly. Benoit talks about being a Dynamite Kid mark and his short-man complex. It’s actually a pretty good promo; I’m just being snarky. Arn Anderson congratulates Benoit. It’s nice, but it’s not gonna make him stay, folks. Kevin Nash walks up and promises to ruin Chris Benoit’s life and career. Not an issue for Benoit, actually! Tony S. says, “we have found out the future of WCW [and the] WCW [World Heavyweight] Championship.” HAHAHAHA, no, we’re still working through that one, Tony. Oh yeah, Sid/Benoit was far and away the best match on either show I’ve been comparing throughout this review: ADVANTAGE: Souled Out ‘00. Final thoughts: First, was this the worst WCW PPV ever? Well, we ended up with BatB ‘99 and Souled Out ’00 each having three wins in this comparison(with three pushes), which tells you something about the comparatively low quality of both shows. I would say that the tiebreaker is Souled Out ’00 having by far the best match of either show in its main event. Hooray, Souled Out 2000 isn’t the worst WCW PPV ever by my estimation! Second, hooray! Souled Out is dead! No more of this fucking show! Don’t watch Souled Out 2000 in complete form, by the way. Just watch Sid/Benoit, as the wrestling gods surely intend you to do. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zendragon Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 I didn't now I KNOW WHO THAT IS! pre dated Ex-WWE guys showing up in TNA also supposedly the Malenko thing was a shoot do to his frustration with the company 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zendragon Posted September 13 Share Posted September 13 Video | Facebook Sid v Benoit another great match from the Crippler I'd not seen! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirSmUgly Posted September 13 Author Share Posted September 13 15 hours ago, zendragon said: also supposedly the Malenko thing was a shoot do to his frustration with the company I don't believe this. The look on Malenko's face told on him, unless he can act really well, and we know he can't. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirSmUgly Posted September 14 Author Share Posted September 14 Show #223 – 17 January 2000 “The one that manages to be even worse than the typical Vince Russo effort with no Russo on the creative team” Commissioner Nash rolls up in his caddy, Jeff Jarrett and Scott Steiner in tow. The intro has cut out the dancing of the now non-existent Nitro Girls. It’s now a very short intro. Maybe they should shoot a new intro. Billy Kidman and Psicosis get jobber entrances for the opener, which is an opener that actually somehow involves two cruiserweights. The division is too dead for it to be hot, though. Kidman wins an opening counter-exchange with Psicosis, landing a headscissors before booting his way out of a Psicosis corner charge and landing a diving crossbody from the top for two. Tenay puts Kidman over as a top star, not just a top cruiserweight. Psicosis hits a dope suicide dive of his own after dumping Kidman to the floor. Psicosis puts Kidman back in the ring and lands a diving wheel kick from the top, but he takes time to celebrate and only gets two once he covers. Don’t blame Charles Robinson for his count, buddy. You know you done fucked up. Psicosis tries to whip Kidman into the corner, but Kidman reverses and hits a rebound clothesline for two. He tries a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker that Psicosis rotates out of; Psicosis hits one of his own for two. Psicosis jaws at Robinson some more, then taunts the crowd before tossing Kidman to the floor for an obligabrawl. PSicosis controls that, then puts Kidman back in the ring, but he takes time going up top and gets dropkicked in the gut as he dives. They struggle to their feet, and Psicosis misses a wild swing that Kidman ducks under. Kidman lands a rebound bulldog for two, then sits Psicosis on the top for a move that gets turned into a super facebuster which earns one more two count for Psicosis. Psicosis shoots Kidman in, but runs himself into a release German that scores a close count for Kidman. Kidman hoists Psicosis up for a body slam, but Psicosis hops behind Kidman and drills a DDT, then goes up and lands a guillotine legdrop for only two, as if you’ll recall, Kidman isn’t just a cruiserweight anymore. Psicosis tries a powerbomb, and man, he’s just asking to eat a counter-facebuster for three, which he does. Decent opener! And they wrestled for more than two minutes! And there were no run-ins! So, since neither the Hitman nor Jarrett competed at Souled Out, both of them were stripped of their respective titles. Guess what? VACANT is our champion for both of them! OK, let me update the counters: WCW World Heavyweight Championship title change count: 3 (Hitman > VACANT > Benoit > VACANT) WCW United States Championship title change count: 1 (Jarrett > VACANT) We get a statement from Arn Anderson in which he continues to be bummed about Terry Funk getting his ass kicked and is now additionally bummed that he missed Sid breaking the plane of the bottom rope with his leg. He does a pretty good job of saying that he’s still a wrestler and has that mentality rather than the mentality of an official, so that’s why he got way too into the match and missed the second rope break. He also sells feeling bad about it because he’s lost matches where he feels that the ref was out of position, but now he’s done the same to Sid as a referee. Arn: “I’m sick to my stomach, I wanna puke about it, because I [took Benoit’s greatest moment] away from him.” This is a very good promo; Arn still has the magic sometimes. I guess Nash re-hired Creative Control or the Harris Boys or whatever as bodyguards? Whatever, man. Booker T. is displeased about Stevie trying to embarrass him. He also thought Big T. “was still locked up somewhere.” Okerlund conducts the interview and Midnight is there, too. Booker is still figuring out how to improve and maximize his mic skills. Stevie Ray (w/Big T.) heads to the ring. Heenan notes that Big T. is twice as big as the last time he saw him. True! Stevie, considering a reconciliation with Booker: “We’ve fought before, but we’ve never fought in front of these cracker…jack fruit booties out here.” Stevie’s really toeing a line here, huh? Booker and Midnight come out to respond. Stevie would like Midnight, who he considers a “rat,” to leave before he talks to his brother. Then, he eye’s Booker’s clothes and tells his brother, “I see you’ve been shopping at the same place Mike Tenay’s been shopping at, but that’s cool.” Mean. Stevie says he’ll reconcile with Booker, but Book attacks Big T. Stevie jumps Booker, and T. hits a sloppy Pearl River Plunge – his second in a row because the one at Souled Out was awful, too. This is now a match between T. and Book. T. is completely cooked. When Ahmed was in shape and had working joints, he was somewhat sloppy at the best of times. Now he’s basically a walking mess. Booker comes back and lands a Book End, but goes after Stevie rather than pinning T. and gets hit with a slapjack by T. and covered for three. I am OVER Booker doing jobs for midcarders. Midnight comes back out and stares down T. and Stevie, but they pass without a physical confrontation. Disco Inferno (w/the Mamalukes) enters the ring. Vito doesn’t allow Disco to dance. Vampiro is Disco’s opponent. Tenay points out that Vampiro cleanly defeated the tag champs, which seems like messaging that suggests that Davey Boy Flair and Crowbar won’t be tag champs much longer, no? Vampiro is one step ahead of Disco to start, ending the opening sequence by landing on his feet out of a Disco monkey flip and hitting a standing uranage. He goes up to hit a twisting senton, but misses. Disco jumps all over the mistake and tosses Vampiro to the floor to be beaten down by the Mamalukes at their request. The ref sends them to the back while Disco continues to pour on offense. He lands a lariat, celebrates, and then tries a Chartbuster that Vampiro shoves away from. It doesn’t matter because Disco ends up hitting a neckbreaker for two. He lands a side Russian for two more, than goes up for a second-rope elbowdrop as the crowd chants DISCO SUCKS. He misses that elbow and eats a diving back kick from the top, a facebuster, and a superkick that sends Disco through the ropes and to the floor. The Mamalukes didn’t go to the back; they stood on the ramp and watched the match from afar. They run up and dump Disco back into the ring, but Vampiro simply lifts Disco and drops him with a Nail in the Coffin for three. Vampiro has gotten over with the crowd somehow; he’s been getting decent reactions the past couple of weeks. I don’t really get it. Some ladies, one of whom I think is Major Gunns, do pirouettes as Nash interviews them for a secretary position. OK, this did make me laugh: As Nash promises to make them jump “through a few hoops” and asks one to draw him a cup of coffee, Scotty Steiner begs, “Hey, can we play Twister?” Nash, dismissively: “Nothing sexist, Scotty, nothing sexist.” One of the ladies says she’d like to play Twister and Steiner whines, “She wants to play Twister!” Scott Steiner’s scumbag frat boy nonsense is pretty amusing sometimes. Three Count is in the ring when we come back; Karagias asserts that “eventually, everybody goes down for the Three Count.” Shane Helms and Shannon Moore are getting a tag title shot for some reason, and they immediately hit a series of dives on Dopey Dave and Crowbar before getting dual schoolboys for two. Standards & Practices come to the ring with their clipboards. Meanwhile, in the ring, Dave hits Moore with a vertical suplex, a stomp, and a back suplex for two. Evan Karagias tries to mack on Daffney, who hisses at him like a pissed-off cat. So, Davey sees this and attacks Karagias with his golden crowbar. He and Daffney wander up the aisle while in the ring, Crowbar runs into a superkick, then eats a top-rope rana and diving crossbody combo that only gets two. Flair eventually remembers that he’s a part of this match, and he pulls down the top rope as Moore bounces off them; Crowbar avoids a Helms suplex and scores a reverse DDT for three. That was the most Russo-ific segment so far. Nash has Ronnie and Donnie escort the ladies out and then brainstorms on how to get rid of the Old Age Outlaws. Nash has plans for Arn Anderson, specifically. The Maestro (w/Symphony) meets a squashin’ from Tank Abbott, who gets a pop for some reason. Tank gets in the ring, throws a punch, and gets a KO victory. Norman Smiley’s music plays and Smiley confronts Tank in the aisle. Meng walks up behind Smiley and decides to face off with Tank instead while Smiley attempts to drag him away. There’s an announcement from the commissioner in the ring. I took a quick look at the ratings for these shows, and I think I understand why Sullivan only lasted two months in this position: Nitro drops under three and to consistent 2.7-ish ratings in this booking stint. Might I suggest that centering this show around Commissioner Nash and trying to keep the nWo together as main heel opposition is a major reason? I think I’ve gone from being a fan of Nash to being neutral on him. He’s been diabolical as an on-screen talent and as a booker since the end of 1998 all the way through to now. All the wrestlers in the building walk out to hear the address. Juventud Guerrera doesn’t have a sling on his arm anymore, which is good! Nash, Jarrett, and the Harris Boys hit the ramp while “Hail to the Chief” plays. Nash addresses numerous people as though he is the Wizard of Oz - oh fuck you, Nash, you’re not that clever. He wants to give Tenay (who is getting shots fired at him tonight for some reason) a personality, Knobbs a brain, Tank a heart, and Smiley courage. Of course, after saying this Nash says, “Hey wait a minute, I sound like OZ up here!” The crowd, who wasn’t around for Nash having struggle matches on GAB ’91, gets bored and chants for GOLDBERG, who is injured and therefore another big part of the reason that these shows are dropping below 3s in the ratings. Nash threatens to fire WCW’s only remaining mega-draw, then rambles about Terry Funk’s final acts as commissioner. Nash gets fake fired up about Jarrett being stripped of the U.S. Championship and re-awards it to him. Hold on: WCW United States Championship title change count: 2 (Jarrett > VACANT > Jarrett) Is WCW a stupid company or what? Anyway, Jarrett drops a SLAPNUTS, and SLAP is dashed out in the captioning for some reason that is beyond me. Nash declares that every competitor in WCW will be subject to rectal exams from “Dr. Jellyfinger” before their bouts. HAHAHAHAHAHA but no seriously, fuck off. This fuckhead Nash is choking the remaining flickering life out of this company. Again. We see Sid in the back, annoyed at this charade while watching it on a monitor, and the crowd switches from a GOLDBERG chant to a SID chant. Nash does some other bad comedy and over-the-top villainy like he’s trying to make up for Roddy Piper not being booked on this show. He declares that no wrestlers make eye contact with him in the back, tells them not to ask about the state of the world title, and banns the use of Viagra – a definite Piper-ism – calling out The Total Package for being a heavy user specifically. Nash continues to kill this show by asking Bagwell if he's banging Kim and then sets Bagwell vs. DDP with Kimberly as the special guest ref for tonight’s main event. He promises to provide Kim with the ref’s outfit that he personally picked out himself. I thought they fired Russo; are we entirely sure he’s not still writing this show? Please tell me this Commissioner Nash shit is over in a couple more weeks. PLEASE. I guess Kimberly just showed up to the arena because Nash calls her in and gives her a tiny ref shirt, informs her which match she will be reffing tonight, and then asks her whether Buff or Page is better in bed. I’m done. Even an appearance from Leia Meow can’t get me to perk up for this show. She leads out the Varsity Club (minus the apparently out-of-ideas Kevin Sullivan). The two idiots in this shitty tag team rant on the mic and do so quite poorly. You’d think that the Columbus crowd would be more vocal about Rick Steiner in his Michigan letterman’s jacket, but they don’t care. Nor do I. Masahiro Chono and Super J are their opponents. Super J is nWo Sting, in case you were wondering. Tenay goes over all the background on these two, including informing us about a fucking nWo Japan feud involving Chono and Rotundo/a that I couldn’t squeeze out two shits about if I ate Luger’s Ex-Lax brownies from a few Nitros back. There’s an obligabrawl between Chono and Steiner outside the ring while Farmer and Rotundo/a do some cursory work inside the ring. This match fucking STINKS. Here’s the finish: After what feels like the whole year of 2000 eventually passes, Chono and Steiner brawl in the aisle while Farmer works out of an interminable Rotundo/a abdominal stretch. This is SO BAD. There’s some more slow brawling, and finally, fucking FINALLY, after some near falls that no one cares about, Nick Patrick is too distracted to count a Rotundo/a small package on Chono that Farmer is able to shift the leverage on; Chono scores three for his team. Everyone does a slow and shitty brawl after the match. You might say that I’m overreacting about a nothing tag match in the middle of a nothing Nitro, but that might be the worst match I’ve seen on Nitro in a long while, and that includes any of the dumb Russo-booked shit that’s been on Nitro lately. This is the second straight long segment on this show to hit my Dirt Worst list. Right there is the downside of bad non-Russo WCW; interminable segments and matches that go on for hours and hours. At least when Russo books a bad match or segment, it’s generally over fairly quickly. Sid Vicious, an actual star, walks the aisle. Thank goodness. He faces THE WALL, BROTHER, who dapped Sid up a few weeks ago, but I guess is back to being a heel who doesn’t like Sid tonight. Sid kicks TW,B in the chest, then big boots him as soon as TW,B gets in the ring. I hope the booking committee is smart enough to just have Sid kill TW,B off. Sid dominates an obligabrawl after sending TW,B to ringside; Sid hits him with a chair three or four times while the ref is just like, OK, cool, man, do you. Sid tosses TW,B across the announce table, causes the commentators to scatter, and hits TW,B with a plastic water bottle. The crowd is obviously into this. TW.B gets back onto the apron and is clubbed back down, and we cut to the fucking back where Disco and the Mamalukes offer their services to Commissioner Nash. Nash asks them if they know a guy named Vinnie Vegas from around the way HAR HAR HAR, I ALSO GET THAT REFERENCE; YOU SEE, NASH USED TO BE NAMED VINNIE VEGAS ABOUT THREE GIMMICKS AGO, SO FUNNY, MUCH WIT and then orders them to go out there and beat Sid down. Back in the ring, Sid hits TW,B with a chokeslam for three. The Mamalukes get in the ring one by one and eat powerbombs. Disco makes to get in after them, but thinks better of it. Well, at least they’re putting Sid over strong. It’s obvious that we’re headed toward Sid/Nash at SuperBrawl for the WCW World Heavyweight Championship. Sid needs to win that one. A WCW Mastercard ad with Sting in it plays. There’s a Nitro Girls Mastercard and an nWo Wolfpac Mastercard, both of which are out of date. As is the Hollywood Hogan Mastercard, come to think of it. Konnan also has a Mastercard design. Obviously, who would be placed on these cards went into the planning stages in late 1998. Scott Steiner (w/ladies) physically attacks tOSU’s mascot in the aisle on his way to the ring, but it garners very little cheap heat. He cuts a promo about how Michigan’s women are hotter than Ohio’s, freaks, peaks, etc., etc. He says that beating Ohio State is easy, “just like [Ohio’s] women.” Isn’t that a good thing if you’re working a Wilt Chamberlain gimmick? You’d want women who enjoy having sex to agree to have sex with you, right? He wastes time reciting Michigan’s fight song and fighting a plant in the crowd. This absolutely sucked. The Total Package and Liz are next out. TTP’s opponent is Bam Bam Bigelow, who I know makes it to the end of this company because if I am right, he’s either the only heel to win on the last Nitro episode or the only babyface to lose on the last Nitro episode. It’s one of those two. I saw it in real time, but I haven’t seen the last Nitro episode since it originally aired. Unfortunately, this means over a year left of Bam Bam Bigelow matches. This is a nothing back-and-forth match. Lots of stomps, weak clotheslines, and headbutts. Bigelow lands a diving headbutt, then goes for a Greetings while Liz distracts the ref. Kanyon runs in and tries to hit Bam Bam with his cane. Bam Bam cuts him off, but Package takes a bottle of champagne from Biggs, cracks Bigelow over the head with it, and scores a three count. We’re going to do MORE Kanyon/Bigelow? Why?! Let’s get this Buff Bagwell/DDP match over and done with. Kim’s referee top is comparatively restrained considering a lot of the stuff she typically wears. I think crowds are ready to cheer Page again, so maybe someone should think about turning him babyface again. He got very tired by the time Scott Steiner was rolling him on the mic, but this past year pretty much proves that fans just needed Page to reset himself and his character before fans would be into cheering him again. As for Buff, he’s a terrible babyface. This feud probably could use a well-crafted double-turn somewhere in there. Kim is slow to count an early Page cover; Page only gets one. An obligabrawl soon occurs. Both men brawl into the crowd. It’s a mediocre brawl, as you might guess. Honestly, the best thing about this match is that it’s relatively short. They brawl back and forth; Page tries to bring some heat to this thing with his facial expressions and body language, but Buff Bagwell simply isn’t very good, especially as a babyface. After a nutcracker against the post that incapacitates Bagwell, Page gets back in the ring and looks for a Diamond Cutter, but Buff blocks it by hooking the top rope and then goes back to his stomp-choke offense. Page tries a discus clothesline, but gets single-arm DDT’d, and Kim’s wonky count (which makes sense, since she’s not a ref) allows Page to kick out at around 2.9. Good timing from Page on that count. Buff tries another cover and they do a bunch of cover reversals around Kim being awful at counting. Buff goes up for a Blockbuster, but Page topples into the top rope, crotches him, and goes up to suplex Page. Buff low-blows Page back to the mat, hits a Blockbuster, and then Kim completely mistimes a spot where she’s supposed to run into Buff’s arm as he signals that the match is over so that she can bump. Or maybe she was trying to shove Buff? It was UGLY, but Buff stops to check on her and Page gets up and lands a Diamond Cutter for three. Kimberly storms away unhappily maybe? Or annoyed? This was excruciatingly bad television and a third Dirt Worst entry for this show. And it didn’t even take three hours to get three bad segments! Sullivan and Company were really trying to match the departed Vince Russo’s energy, but with longer boring matches to nowhere, huh? Ferrara is still here and a part of the booking team, I think; again, it's important that we re-assess how much blame Russo gets for tanking WCW's creative and focus more criticism on Nash and Ferrara, among other people. This was a trash show that should have ended after Arn explained his actions at Souled Out.No, not just a trash show, but legitimately one of the two or three worst Nitro episodes that I've seen. -125 out of 5 Stinger Splashes. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twiztor Posted September 15 Share Posted September 15 yeah, i think that after Russo's departure, there's just so much uncertainty backstage that the shows suck. Sullivan is head booker, trying to pick up where Russo left off. i have no idea how much Ferrara and/or Nash are involved, but looking at the recap, i'd guess plenty. But i think the most likely problem here is that the talent weren't given solid plans and/or time to implement said plans. This lead to promos and matches being longer, but saying less. Makes most everything feel like filler, just buying time until the next PPV or the next booker. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirSmUgly Posted September 15 Author Share Posted September 15 (edited) Thunder Interlude – show number ninety-five – 19 January 2000 "The WCW Gang might just be stuck in their worst malaise yet" We see a shot of a door, guarded by mooks…Apparently, WCW officials are meeting in regard to the WCW World Championship…OK, why don’t they start by firing Nash as commissioner, logically?...Fuuuuuu, no, never mind, it doesn’t matter…Nothing in WCW matters... David Flair and Crowbar put their tag titles on the line in the opener; their opponents are the shitty-ass Mamalukes (w/Disco Inferno)…Disco joins commentary to the disappointment of everyone already sitting there…Vito hits a series of chokes on David in a scintillating bit of offense...Dopey Dave has the weakest shoulderblocks that I’ve seen in a long time…Everyone at the desk makes fun of Tony S. for having the last name “Schiavone,” but not knowing what a “mamaluke” is…Crowbar finally interjects himself into the proceedings by diving onto the other three wrestlers at ringside…I like Crowbar, but he’s the only good worker in this thing and can’t do it all himself… Crowbar gets two on a diving crossbody, but gets superkicked to lose control of the match…Crowbar is FIP while Vito and the Bull do mediocre offensive spots…Davey clubs the Bull on a rope run and Crowbar grabs the guy and hits a picture-perfect Northern Lights with a bridge for two…Davey comes back in the ring and moves at quarter speed, doing awkward spots and bumps…The Bull whiffs on a jumping kick that Davey might have ducked or Johnny might have missed, who knows…The Bull leaps from the mat to the top rope, but he isn’t clean with it…It’s a decent athletic spot, but it’s such a struggle for him that maybe it’s not a spot he should do…It’s cool not to do stuff that you don’t quite have the athleticism to do well… The best part of this match is Daffney doing a mock disco dance, then sticking out her tongue at Disco and cackling…Daffney’s working sort of a Lydia Deetz/Harley Quinn mash-up gimmick that IMO rules…We finally get a finish in which Daffney passes the crowbar to Davey…Crowbar gets propelled out of a rollup attempt into Davey’s crowbar…Vito lands a lifted DDT for three and the tag titles…YUUUUUUUUUCK…Davey and Daffney do a pratfall while making out…FIRE KEVIN SULLIVAN… WCW World Tag Team Championship title change count: 2 (VACANT > David Flair and Crowbar > The Mamalukes)… Tenay says there will be announcement about the Cruiserweight Championship, and maybe I should have kept count on the changes for it, too…THE WALL, BROTHER vs. Berlyn and DDP vs. Kanyon are also booked for the show…Commissioner Nash is barred from entering the WCW Championship Committee meeting in the back… Hacksaw Duggan is still in his janitorial uniform…So, did Nash keep him in that role, or like what?...Honestly, I haven’t seen Hacksaw clean a toilet since December of 1999 or so…Duggan swears that he will never do what he said he’d do and denounce America…Instead of the Revolution, which is pretty much dead considering two of its members are off to the WWF (and it would be three, but Shane Douglas ain’t getting a life raft back to that company), Curt Hennig walks out…He and Duggan have a fucking mic battle…What are Sullivan and that booking team doing?...Duggan challenges Hennig, who declines until Duggan indicates that Hennig is a big ol’ chicken…This match sucks, as you’d guess…The finish is that Duggan takes the 2x4 from Hennig and swings it at him, but Hennig shoves the ref in the way of the swing…Hennig escapes and Duggan makes stupid faces while Mickey Jay sells a stomach injury…The match just ends instead of having another ref run down like normal… The nWo harasses some dude working at a computer in an attempt to find out what’s going on in the committee meeting… Three Count does a dance routine in the ring…Also, they do it on the video screen…Their dancing is so bad…It’s fantastic…Norman Smiley jumps in and dances behind them…He hits a Big Wiggle…This is unironically the second-best segment on TV in the current Sullivan Era so far…Karagias spots Norm on a pirouette and charges…Smiley takes care of him and then Moore before hitting a swinging slam on Helms and Big Wiggling again…Smiley gets a mic: “Did you see that?! I just beat up three of the toughest, most feared wrestlers here in WCW; how dare Commissioner Kevin Nash say that Norman Smiley has no courage!”…Smiley is the best…He says he’ll fight anybody…"Anybody" turns out to be Tank Abbott...Smiley tries to use David Penzer as a human shield, backs away, shrieks, and gets one-punch KO’d…OK, so the segment ended on a downer, but the stuff before Tank showed up was fun!... I guess harassing a lone computer person didn’t work, so Nash sends Ronnie and Donnie to crash the committee meeting… Lash LeRoux wrestles Psicosis (w/Juventud Guerrera) and Chavo Jr. in a triple threat…Oh no, Juvi hits a People’s Eyebrow and then does a mic routine in which he tries a chant-along that no one participates in…I think it’s intended for the crowd not to participate, right?...Is the idea that Juvi is a fraud who is supposed to be treated as such?...Oh no, I'm close to typing IT'S SUPPOSED TO SUCK, aren't I?...Chavo Jr. comes out here with a suitcase full of products…Chavo and Psicosis wrestle while Lash hangs in the back and observes to start…Psicosis and Chavo finally figure it out after an exchange of reversals and club LeRoux at the same time…They combo up on him until Psicosis covers Lash after a diving back kick… There’s some good stuff in this match…Chavo murks Psicosis with a flapjack, for example…I do not like this type of match and wish Chavo and Psicosis just wrestled each other straight up…Chavo is improbably still able to get crowds to chant for him…Why didn’t WCW do anything with him after he got over in 1998?!...I know, I’ve written that sentence far too often…Chavo lands a dive to Lash, and Psicosis tosses him back in the ring to try and capitalize…Chavo tries to dive on them, but gets slammed into the ground…Psicosis gets dumped, and Lash tries a Bourbon Street Blues on Chavo…Chavo ducks the final haymaker and hits a pretty floatover DDT…He follows up with a Tornado DDT on LeRoux…Psicosis sneaks up top and lands a guillotine legdrop on LeRoux and quickly covers for three…Decent for the type of match it was, but no Lash would have made it way better… TAFKAPI (w/Paisley) gets fed to Billy Kidman in the next bout…TAFKAPI has a shitty dub instead of his enjoyable “Purple Rain” knockoff theme…I mean, that thing sounds so much like the real deal that I get it…I miss WCW’s knockoff themes so much, though…TAFKAPI doesn’t really get how to pull off a Prince Rogers imitation, which is bad because a lot of this match is shtick…Very bad shtick…I think Iaukea is a pretty solid worker, too, so it’s too bad…Aw man, it’s Torrie Wilson…She marches to the ring and jaws at Paisley…I don’t like this match at all…Iaukea’s bad character work and the promise of more Torrie Wilson on television has disinterested me entirely…Torrie trips TAFKAPI and helps Kidman get control of the match…Kidman wins this match with a Sky High…He and Torrie embrace after the match… Charisma magnet Terry Taylor enters the ring surrounded by a phalanx of guards to talk about the WCW World Heavyweight Championship…Taylor announces that Kevin Nash will be allowed to pick one of the title contenders, as is the commissioner's right…The committee picks the other contender: Sid Vicious…There will be a title match between Sid and Nash's choice on Nitro...Kevin Nash and the nWo hit the ramp…Nash thinks Taylor is a dope because the years of bleaching his hair have caused peroxide poisoning…Nash tries to be funny and fired up at the same time and achieves neither with any sense of conviction or success…He says that he’s making a match between Sid and Jeff Jarrett on Nitro before Sid moves on to the title match, and if Jarrett wins, Sid doesn't get the shot and his chosen contender will be champ...Um, what?...No, you know what, forget it…Jarrett speaks…Something something SLAPNUT something something awful mic worker…Nash then books himself against Sid in the title match, should Sid be able to get past Jarrett… In the back, Nash books matches like he’s Vince Russo and randomly makes a Big T./Booker T. vs. The Total Package/Sid main event… Berlyn needs an immediate re-re-packaging…His opponent is THE WALL, BROTHER in what is an ice cold feud between two guys no one in the crowd gives a fuck about…We get an obligabrawl after TW,B backdrops Wright to the floor…It’s a long obligabrawl that goes back and forth for about ten years…Does Billy Silverman not know how to count to ten in kayfabe?...Or even how to count toward ten?...Berlyn botches a springboard move on the top rope and the crowd laughs at him…A guy holds up a YOU’RE NOT THE ROCK sign in the background…So that’s how this is going…Finally, after far too long, TW,B chokesl-no, Berlyn fights out of it and runs himself into a TW,B big boot to eat a loss instead… In a weird outro, DDP stretches and groans while repeating a Debra-ism about being rode hard and put away wet while Kimberly disinterestedly listens to his complaints while thumbing through a book… Oklahoma hits the ring for promo time…Might as well toss that Cruiserweight Championship in the bin right next to the TV Championship…Oklahoma cuts a vile promo that takes longer than it needs to before he finally VACATES the title…OK, hold on, I’m adding this to our count… WCW World Cruiserweight Championship title change count: 2 (Madusa > Oklahoma > VACANT)… Madusa walks to the ring while commentary talks about her boobs…She insists on responding…It’s also not very good!...It’s very bad, actually!...Oklahoma declines to wrestle Madusa, but, huh, Sherri Martel got re-hired to this company?...She runs up and attacks Madusa from behind…I was not aware that Sherri Martel ever made another WCW appearance after she disappeared in 1997…They have a mediocre wrestling match while Miss Hancock sits on the commentary desk and takes notes…Madusa gets three on a suplex floatover, I think… You’re never gonna get YEAH YEAH over, Jerry Flynn…Just letting you know, bud…A fatigues-clad Fit Finlay is his opponent…Buzzkill wanders around out in the stands while holding a STOP THE VIOLENCE sign…Eh, it’s not like we’re missing much by cutting to him instead of watching this match…This is an acceptable bout, I suppose…Brian Knobbs walks to ringside with a kendo stick…Finlay dumps Flynn to ringside and the orders Knobbs to do his obligabrawling for him…Someone yells YOU’RE NO JUSTIN CREDIBLE at Flynn, which is an unnecessary insult…Knobbs whiffs on a stick shot and cracks Finlay in the head…Flynn gets a quick rollup for three…After the match, Finlay dresses down Knobbs for being a fuck-up… Kanyon (w/ladies and J. Biggs) wrestles Diamond Dallas Page (w/Kimberly Page) next…Kanyon does some pre-match mic work…He’s not pleased about being booked against a guy who he’s already beaten…Kanyon is disgusted that Page is proud to be from Jersey, which is as bad as being proud to be from [insert city that Thunder is in tonight]…Kanyon decides that he doesn’t want to wrestle, but DDP’s music hits… Kim comes to ringside while Kanyon barks at her…Kanyon: “Why don’t you ditch the white trash DDP and come be with a real man?”…Everyone is ripping off Scott Steiner when they’re not ripping off the Rock, I guess…Kim teases Kanyon and pretends to consider it, but it’s a ruse so that Page can jump Kanyon from behind…Page rolls Kanyon until the latter is able to counter his way into a desperation swinging neckbreaker…He takes some time to take off his vest and gets two…Oddly, though Kanyon called the ladies with him “tramps” in a bid to convince Kimberly to get with him, they’re out here cheering for the guy anyway… Page works out of a front facelock and we get an obligabrawl after that…Kanyon hits a Rocker Dropper onto the stairs while Kim, dumbfounded, asks Charles Robinson, “Why would you let him do that?!”…Good kayfabe question, Kim!...This match is fine…They do some reversals and trade two-counts in a decent finishing run…Half this company is doing uranages now, to my point w/r/t imitating the Rock in the previous paragraph…Biggs tries a Halliburton shot, but he’s no Mongo McMichael and Kanyon gets bonked…Page tries a Diamond Cutter, but Kanyon uses a ball shot to get out of it…Kim knocks down J. Biggs outside the ring while Page and Kanyon counter each other inside the ring…Kanyon grabs the Halliburton, but he’s also no Mongo and doesn’t even get a swing off before Page runs up and lands a Diamond Cutter for three…Commentary makes it clear that Page and Kimberly are together and happy again…Alright, that probably means that a Kimberly turn is coming up… The Total Package and Big T. make plans for their tag partners before the main event… Alright, Booker and Big, the T.’s, face The Total Package and Sid…Sid and Big T. face off as the main event babyface trios team that headlined In Your House: International Incident EXPLODES…Kevin Nash stands at the top of the ramp to look upon his works which make me despair…Tenay signs off two minutes earlier than he’s supposed to and then keeps talking like he didn’t just do so…Tenay calls Jarrett the “roadblock” to Sid, but Roadblock is the “roadblock,” dammit!...Big hits Book with a slapjack, Sid attacks Big with a chokeslam, and Package racks a KO’d Booker for the win…This thing where WCW creative is jobbing Booker out every show is some of the worst fucking booking I’ve had the displeasure of sitting through, and that says a lot considering WCW television since August of 1998… I just saw twiztor’s post about how directionless this two-month interstitial feels…If I weren’t committed to this project, it feels like I’d tap out around here or maybe just skip ahead to BatB 2000 and pick up from there…late 1998 and almost all of 1999 was bad, but at least it felt like there was direction…Some directions, the company veered away from too quickly…This post-Souled Out period where the company lost four good midcarders (one who was ascending to the main event), sent another one who was popular home, and is backfilling their two-hour shows with Jeff Farmer, Mike Rotundo/a, Brian Knobbs, Curt Hennig, and guys like them is rough… Earlier, I did a ranking of the top five personnel moves between WCW and WWF in terms of their impact, and I didn’t rank the Radicalz…I still might not do that because the other five moves are either crucial talent losses/infusions or symbolic moves that are meaningful as broader markers of the Monday Night War at the time they happened (or both, like Hall and Nash to WCW)…HOWEVER, the loss of the Radicalz immediately makes the midcard nearly unwatchable…If Rey wasn’t hurt, that would help…But also, no Goldberg, Ric, or Sting on these shows along with no Rey, Eddy, Benoit, etc., is really a nadir for WCW...They have little star power and vastly diminished in-ring output in a combination that I don't think they've before had this whole Nitro Era… As an aside, WCW put on basically two straight years of inconsistent, but mostly bad programming from post-BatB 1998 until late 2000 (I would guess September, post-New Blood Rising, is when things improve to the end, but we’ll see)…I would say that I haven't enjoyed the programming consistently in all that time except for like three weeks in April of '99...Did AOL Time Warner execs want WCW on their books and television channels?...No…But did WCW make it awfully easy for AOL Time Warner to make a decision to jettison them?...Absolutely…And you can’t put all that at the feet of Brad Siegel trying to kill the company without making it too obvious…Bischoff, Nash, and Russo all got us here, and in that order of culpability, IMO…Anyway, OWWWWWWWWW, watching this show hurt… Edited September 15 by SirSmUgly 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twiztor Posted September 15 Share Posted September 15 3 hours ago, SirSmUgly said: Thunder Interlude – show number ninety-five – 19 January 2000 …If I weren’t committed to this project, it feels like I’d tap out around here or maybe just skip ahead to BatB 2000 and pick up from there… you've already come this far. just a couple months until the Bischoff-Russo/Ferrera Era (BRFE?) starts up. i think it's worth sticking around just to see how abrupt that changeover is or isn't. Also to see the actual beginnings of the New Blood storyline that dominates the summer. On an ACTUAL positive note, you're only like 6ish(?) months from Nitro being decently enjoyable again! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zendragon Posted September 16 Share Posted September 16 I feel like between Los Guerreros and The Chavo Classic stuff, Chavo was surprisingly better used in WWE 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirSmUgly Posted September 16 Author Share Posted September 16 Show #224 – 24 January 2000 “The one that crowns a new WCW World Heavyweight Champion and in its own way debuts a future WCW World Heavyweight Champion” *sigh*, let’s Nitro, I suppose. Bobby Duncum Jr. passed away on this date and gets an in memoriam and a ring bell salute before the logo. The nWo and a number of ladies get out of a few limos. Scott Hall doesn’t get out of his limo because he’s trying to get some lovin’, so Nash has to knock on his window and get his attention. I’m somewhat surprised to see Hall back on WCW television, but I can’t imagine that he’s here for much longer. Psicosis doesn’t get any music as he hits the ring. We’re too busy listening to Juventud Guerrera do his shitty Rock imitation. So, this is a match in yet another fucking title tournament. Russo’s not here, so I don’t see a bracket on screen. Psicosis faces the also severely underutilized Kaz Hayashi in round one. The finals will be at SuperBrawl X. Kaz and Psicosis open with Kaz hitting release Germans and springboard dropkicks and a sick twisting Tsukahara at a slow-ish pace. I think that the pace of these matches is important – maybe not as much as Bischoff, mind you, but he's generally right that it matters. I do think they need to pick up the pace. This division needs to get back to the pacey counter-fests that defined it in the early days. This match is weirdly plodding for a match with a number of high spots. Kaz and Psicosis spend time fighting over an Irish whip, for example, which isn’t a bad spot in isolation, but which slows down the pace of the match. Psicosis spends a lot of time jawing into the hard camera. I’ll give Bischoff this much: He understood that what made the cruisers so interesting in the context of your typical Nitro is that they offered an alternative to more deliberately paced heavyweight matches. This match is not laid out that way at all. Psicosis can be a bully and a jerk and up the pace at the sametime; I’ve seen him do it in WCW and in ECW. This match is pretty disappointing. It’s not bad, but it’s bang average and totally forgettable. There’s a short obligabrawl in there that Psicosis wins; he gets in the ring and wastes time taunting, then tries another dive and gets dropkicked in the solar plexus. They get back in the ring, and Kaz tries a superplex, but Psicosis turns it into a super front suplex. They have an incredibly sloppy finish after that with whiffed kicks and an ugly flash pinfall that gets three for Psicosis. Let me revise: That ended up being a bad match. Tonight’s bouts: Other than Sid’s matches against Jeff Jarrett and (theoretically) Kevin Nash, we get Kidman vs. Vampiro, Booker T. vs The Total Package, and the Mamalukes vs. Fit Finlay and Brian Knobbs for the tag titles. The production crew gets drunk and cuts away to a shot of the set while commentary is yammering about Sid. Nash and Hall comment on Terry Funk and Arn Anderson showing up before Nash tells Jarrett that the doc told him that Jarrett flunked his physical and can’t wrestle Sid tonight, but don't worry, Nash has got a pla—(here’s where the show cut to commercial). The show comes back to Nash booking “some goof walking around in his gear” against Bam Bam Bigelow, but either this Network edit or the original show didn’t show the identity of said goof, so your guess is as good as mine about who it is. Norman Smiley is my guess based on the comments. Future WCW World Cruiserweight Tag Champion Kid Romeo gets his first Nitro entrance – a jobber entrance – in his debut against THE WALL, BROTHER. Romeo tries a go-behind, is very ineffective, and gets his ass kicked. OK, Terry Funk is the guy Nash booked against Bigelow. There’s also a bounty on Funk's head. I have to say, what Funk was wearing is not necessarily Funk's ring gear specifically; I think Funk just dresses with the FUNK U t-shirt and the striped pants every day, like he’s got a closet full of those t-shirts and those pants. It’s like when Doug Funnie or Bart Simpson opened their closet doors. The match is an overlong, barely competitive squash that even has an unnecessary obligabrawl in it. THE WALL, BROTHER eats an enziguri, but catches a Romeo dive, hits a front slam, and blocks a schoolboy attempt with a goozle and a chokeslam for three. Gene Okerlund interviews Sid Vicious; please make this guy the champ. I ask so little of you, WCW. Sid calls himself “a monster truck out of control,” and therefore is not scared of running into any roadblocks or even Roadblock, for that matter. Arn Anderson walks up to Bam Bam and tells him not to go along with Commissioner Nash’s fuckery, but Bam Bam says he’d take out his own mother for the 15K bounty. Arn is regretful about what is about to happen to Bammer as a result. Oh, hey, that’s Midajah sitting next to Scotty Steiner. I think she’s been in these skits the past couple of weeks, actually. I just didn’t recognize her. Anyway, the Messrs. Scott call a few jobbers in and ask which one wants a match tonight. Al Greene immediately raises his hand, and though the Messrs. Scott tell him that he’s getting an easy task, I don’t believe them. Three Count doesn’t even get to dance before Norman Smiley’s music cuts in. Smiley wrestles Shannon Moore in a short match. Norm hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker and then Big Wiggles. Moore tries a sunset flip and gets blocked, spanked, and facebustered. Moore just can’t get on track until Smiley dumps him outside to counter a headscissors attempt; that's when Helms and Karagias attack. Smiley fends them off, but Moore hits a springboard moonsault on Smiley, then lands a body slam and a dancing legdrop back in the ring for two. Alas, Moore tries to flip his way out of a slam attempt and gets twisted into a Norman Conquest that coaxes a quick submission from him. It was too short to be much other than enjoyable, but forgettable. Nash enlists one or more of the Harris Boys to wrestle Sid in Jarrett’s stead. The nWo sent Al Greene out to eat a short right from Tank Abbott for a knockout. Oh if only they just let Russo put the big gold on him! It would have been Goldberg redux! This show would have been in the 5s in no time! Abbott yells at one of his former UFC buddies in the front row. Heenan insists on talking to Abbott’s former UFC buddy, who calls Tank a sellout. Is this the Big Al thing? Ah, it is. By the way, as the interview progresses, I hear I’M THE GREATEST, which plays too early, but which gets me excited for… The return of the Cat!...I am so happy to see this guy…He got injured, showed up to lose to Lash LeRoux in the world title tournament from last year (Show #212), and disappeared again. He tries to heel, but the fans have decided that they kind of like him. He insults a rotund dude in the crowd who actually might be a legit fan in his feelings rather than a plant. Just turn him babyface already. Uh, except to that upset fan in the crowd, I guess. The Messrs. Scott watch Al Greene get loaded into an ambulance and giggle. Bam Bam Bigelow jumps Terry Funk with a chair as Funk WALKS backstage, where their hardcore bout begins immediately. Wrestlers hit other wrestlers with stuff. Bigelow does wrap a noose around Funk’s neck and drag him, which is like the one cool spot in the whole thing, and good for WCW that they didn’t do this with a black wrestler in Funk’s spot. They don’t need to give any more juice to the upcoming discrimination lawsuit than they already have by suspending Konnan without pay, but giving Kidman a push on TV even though both men were asking for their releases along with the rest of the Radicalz. This is a slightly better grade of this type of match because Bigelow actually targets a body part other than the head; he works Funk’s shoulder and eventually tries to hit it with a diving headbutt. Funk makes a comeback and does a wobbly old-man moonsault off the middle rope, and I was worried that Bam Bam wasn’t going to catch him for a second and that he’d end up folded on the guardrail. Funk hits a series of headbutts that knock him out at the same time that they ground his opponent down. Where does this fit on the scale of proper headbutt spots w/r/t age, ethnicity, etc.? Bammer drops a diving headbutt after that spot and goes up for another, but for some reason, Finlay and Knobbs run down and attack Bigelow. They’re not very successful, but they do put a chair in front of Funk’s face as Bam Bam tries another diving headbutt; then, they roll Funk on top of Bam Bam for three. Um, what? Funk gets a mic after the match and says that Nash’ll have to kill him to get him out of WCW. He also promises that he’s bringing a few friends to Thunder to combat Nash and the nWo. Syko Sid hits the ring for his match against Ron and/or Don Harris. Sid loves bashing a dude with a plastic water bottle because it doesn’t hurt, but the water goes everywhere and you hear the impact of the plastic on skull. That’s how you pro wrestle safely, folks. I almost think it must have hurt for a second before realizing that it’s not even a stoutly made Aquafina bottle. It’s one of those Crystal Geyser or Kirkland bottles that crumple if you look at them funny. Anyway, Sid takes a boring beatdown from Ra/oD after beating up Da/oR outside the ring. Ra/oD throws a worse chinlock than Bammer or Stevie Ray in there. I mean, this is a looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong chinlock spot. The camera gets a good shot of this shitty headlock that Ra/oD barely cinches in while yelling LOOK’ADAT…LOOK’ADAT…CAIN’T NOBODY BEAT ME. I expect a rural Midwesterner or rural Appalachian wrestler to be throwing great punches while yelling about how awesome they are in their native American English dialect, not doing extremely loose chinlocks. Sid comes back after laying around and chilling in this headlock that he tried to sell, but I couldn’t buy it, that’s how bad the headlock was, and he chokeslams Ra/oD. Da/oR replaces his fallen dipshit brother behind Sid’s back, but Sid powerbombs him and scores a three count anyway. Billy Kidman (w/Torrie Wilson) and Vampiro go at it next. These are two awkward wrestlers who WCW crowds tend to dig. Vampiro got himself over while being not-very-well booked in the midcard. I don’t get it, but it’s impressive! After Vampiro casually lands a release powerbomb, we cut to future WCW World Heavyweight Champion and infamous Nick Gage opponent David Arquette in the front row; Courteney Cox is with him, and Friends is still running at this point (which is a show that I have only seen two episodes of, but is so culturally influential that it provides the titling convention for each of these reviews). Maybe WCW should have made a bigger deal out of having a Friend at ringside, even though Arquette is the star of Ready to Rumble? Oh yeah, this match! It’s solid! These fellas are decent (if sometimes awkward) workers, and they do spots that the crowd likes, like Vampiro catching a Kidman crossbody outside and trying to ram him into the ringpost, but Kidman wriggling out and sending Vamp into it instead. Kidman tries to come back in the ring with a slingshot move that Vamp again catches, this time for a floatover powerslam. He looks for a Nail in the Coffin, but Kidman hops out and lands a Sky High for 2.9. Kidman tries a suplex, but Vamp is next to avoid the move and lands a DDT for a close two count instead. Then, Vamp gets cocky and thinks that if he hit one powerbomb, he can surely get another. The resulting counter-facebuster scores two for Kidman. Kidman weirdly doesn’t hit his rebound bulldog and instead sets up for a different move halfway through; Vamp lands a uranage for two more. He signals that this match is over and goes up to the second rope; his dive meets only double boots. Kidman runs at Vamp and leaps for a Latino Frankensteiner attempt, but Vamp hits a sit-out powerbomb for two. Wow, two-for-three on powerbomb attempts against Kidman! Vampiro is flashing some kayfabe upper-midcard talent potential with those numbers! Wait, two-for-four; I think Vampiro is setting up for a second rope diving powerbomb when Kidman hooks his head and lands a successful Latino Frankensteiner for three. Yeah, if you’re going to have more long matches, maybe have two midcarders who crowds actually care about wrestle these things competitively. Arn and the Funker call someone and get them to agree to show up on Thunder. We can’t hear Okerlund’s interview with Vampiro backstage due to technical difficulties, so they just cut away. The Total Package (w/Liz) comes to the ring so Booker T. can do another job, probably. Kevin Sullivan, Ed Ferrara, and Terry Taylor suck. I’m fully on board with the “shoulda let Jimmy Hart book the show” argument that I’m not sure many people are making about this era of WCW. Package cuts a promo on Sting for being too cowardly to come out there and fight him. Someone waves a Chuckie Finster doll around in the background for some reason. Hey, it’s the ‘90s 2000! Also, that person has way better taste than the fans who would wave Eric Cartman dolls around. Package also namedrops Hulk Hogan while claiming that Hogan isn’t as good as he is. OK, now Booker T. comes out here to do a job. Package jumps Booker at the bell, but struggles to out-punch or out-kick the guy. Booker takes over, wins a short obligabrawl, and then dumps Package back in the ring, where my least favorite transition in pro wrestling happens. Booker survives that and hits a Book End for 2.9. He tries to follow up, but Package dumps him outside and follows; TTP wins this second unnecessary obligabrawl. Package is a fun character, but I do not want to see him wrestle long or even medium matches. He needs Totally Buff to have been created yesterday. Tony S. teases that Funk and Arn got Ric Flair to join their group, which I think is actually what happens. WCW needs Ric on television because this show is sinking and has few stars. Anyway, as for this match, you can guess what happens. Go on, guess. Yep, Booker has Package beaten with an axe kick; Liz distracts the ref, but Midnight runs to the ring and backs her off. The ref is looking at them and not at Big T. jumping Booker from behind with a slapjack shot. Package racks a KO’d Booker for the same fucking finish as Thunder. After the match, Jeff Farmer or someone dressed as Sting stands at the top of the ramp, backlit so we can’t see their face, and points a bat at Package while Sting’s music plays before suddenly disappearing. Okerlund is with Vampiro again; he apologizes for the previous technical issues and claims that the WWF must have sabotaged his microphone. Oh goodness, Okerlund, there’s no need for the WWF to do any of that. WCW are experts at self-sabotage. Vamp cuts a mealy-mouthed babyface promo and asks Kidman for a rematch on Thunder. David Flair, Crowbar, and Daffney are present to watch this upcoming tag title match. They send the current commentary team packing with a crowbar-and-pipe assisted series of threats. We get a shot of a bored Courteney Cox and a fairly engaged David Arquette while the trio on commentary shriek and laugh and say I DUNNO WHAT TO SAY before Crowbar does a pretty good impression of a pretty bad boilerplate color commentator. Crowbar comparing he and David to the Midnight Express is AMAZING. He says that David Flair has the “incredible technical mat skills of Sweet Stan Lane.” Davey: “I do?!? I…do. I do!” If you’re going to make me watch a Mamalukes (w/Disco Inferno) vs. Brian Knobbs and Fit Finlay tag match, I guess at least having Crowbar do a send-up of color commentators and having Stacy Keibler walk out her while wearing a short-ish skirt is the best way to get me to not hate the segment. S&P sends Miss Hancock out to view the proceedings. Tall ladies are the best. My motto is, “if you’re under five-eight, well that ain’t too great.” No offense to the shorties; they’re great too. David Flair puts his own spin on Alyson Hannigan’s famous quote from American Pie – it’s the year 2000, you know – and this segment feels like a lot, very much like a Russo-booked segment. I blame Ferrara for this one. We have one tag team on commentary, Disco trying to hit on Miss Hancock, and a tag match that probably isn’t any good, but that we don’t see enough of it to really know for sure going on in the ring. Crowbar mentions a weak double-sledge caving in someone’s “upper thorax” (hahaha) before David Flair gets on the table and does his shitty running man – and Miss Hancock is charmed and maybe a little turned on by it. COME ON. THAT’S ABSURD. That’s so absurd that I can’t even get mad. It’s kind of funny, actually, is just how absurd it is. Daffney gets upset and stalks Hancock with a pipe while David follows behind her and eventually gets her not to pop Hancock one by making out with her. There’s also a match going on, but it’ll be easier to just give you the finish: Knobbs throws the chair he’s holding at Fit for some reason, I guess because the Bull grabbed his ankle? It makes no sense. Crowbar calls Vito’s lifted DDT the Paisan Plant, so you know what, I’m calling it that now, too. That wins the match after Vito drills Fit with it. Very, very busy. Alright, Kevin Nash comes down the ramp holding a mic; unfortunately, he insists on talking. He basically says that he can make matches and add stips to matches, such is the power of his commissionership. He also tells the GOLDBERG chanters that Goldberg is no longer a WCW employee. Nash snarkily outlaws the powerbomb in the match since “it’s so gosh-darned dangerous.” This is maybe a mildly amusing reference if you recall 1998’s powerbomb ban targeted at Nash. After insulting the crowd and discussing the planning of his championship celebration, we get a break and then… …Sid Vicious hits the ring one more time. Sid and Nash have a match that, while not particularly good, is at least short. Both these guys are much better when fighting smaller guys. About the only big guy that Nash was particularly good against was the Giant. I wonder what Giant/Sid would look like in 1997 or even 1999, for that matter. Heenan obliquely mentioned Nash spiking Giant back at Souled Out ’98 as I typed that out, actually. There’s an obligabrawl that goes into the crowd and Sid sells a punch by falling back into the crowd as they try to push him back to his feet, which was a neat little spot. Back in the ring, Nash locks on a sleeper. You know, Sid has won matches with the chokeslam. He even beat Sting clean with the chokeslam at Road Wild ’99. I don’t think a powerbomb ban is all that damaging to Sid in kayfabe. Anyway, there’s a ref bump, after which Sid dominates. He looks for a powerbomb since the ref is out, but Jeff Jarrett trots down. Sid cuts Jarrett off at the pass, grabs his guitar, and cracks Nash with it. The best part is that he then pulls an Eddy Guerrero and sells that Jarrett cracked him as the ref revives. Luckily, he somehow has the fortitude to crawl over and cover Nash anyway for three. Then, he hits a hilariously smarmy smile into the camera and taps his head like that black British comedian in that one meme. Fantastic. Confetti falls as Sid celebrates his first WCW World Heavyweight Championship reign, which is coming like six or seven years after it probably should have. WCW World Heavyweight Championship title change count: 4 (Hitman > VACANT > Benoit > VACANT > Sid). And we’re not even through January! This show was mostly watchable. Still bad, mind you! But watchable. 1 out of 5 Stinger Splashes. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirSmUgly Posted September 17 Author Share Posted September 17 Thunder Interlude – show number ninety-six – 26 January 2000 "The WCW Gang tries the 'two title changes in the same show' thing on Thunder like they did on Nitro in 1999" It’s autumn time…That means that entries per week are going to drop to somewhere between two (on a bad one) and 4 (on a good one)…I’m still sticking with this project, though!...No more huge posting gaps like back when I was still in 1996 and 1997 unless something extreme happens…There will likely be another two weeks around Christmas where I don’t do any new posts (and probably will just revise older posts)…And then in 2025 as we go from winter to spring to summer, the posts will pick up until we’re hopefully done by August of next year!...I do plan to go back and review all the PPVs that I skipped in 1995 and early 1996 and migrate my early PPV posts from the WWE Network Conversation thread to here as well so that I have made a comprehensive Nitro Era review thread with everything in one place!... (I wrote that for myself as much as for anyone reading this…) Recap: The nWo has tried to stop Sid for the past five or six weeks, but no dice; he’s the champ!... Gene Okerlund introduces the new WCW World Heavyweight Champion Sid to the Las Vegas crowd…The juiced audio is a bummer…I hate it…It’s hard to hear commentary over it sometimes…Anyway, Sid celebrates his own perseverance and claims that the nWo shouldn’t always be coming out on top anyway…I mean, where were you to tell Eric Bischoff this back in 1997?...Sid’s glad to be champ, but he wants to beat the nWo straight up even though he’s got the gold… Kevin Nash (w/flunkies) hits the ring…Yes, Hall, Nash, and Scotty Steiner are just as much flunkies as the Harris Boys, Tylene Buck, and Midajah…Oh no, Nash is going to strip Sid of the title and award it to himself because Sid pinned the wrong Harris Boy on a switcheroo and with a retroactively outlawed powerbomb…You have GOT to be kidding me…Apparently Slick Johnson was convinced that the wrong Harris Boy was in the ring and counted Sid out when he didn’t come back to the ring to re-start the match…They didn’t air this on Nitro; they shot it during a break just for this angle… Well, this feud is one of the worst I’ve seen at this point…Nash threatens Penzer with a firing if he doesn’t get the belt from Sid and then books himself along with the Harris Boy that Sid didn’t pin on Nitro against Sid in a steel cage for the belt…Nash says the powerbomb is still banned for that match and that Sid can only win the bout by pinning Nash [Editor's note: I think that was Nash's word choice - maybe he used a more general term like "defeat" - but we'll see on Nitro]…YUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK…WCW really sucks right now… Time for an update!...WCW World Heavyweight Championship title change count: 5 (Hitman > VACANT > Benoit > VACANT > Sid > Nash) So, besides Sid vs. Kevin Nash and Ra/oD for the big gold, we’re getting The Total Package vs. Buff Bagwell, Billy Kidman vs. Vampiro, Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Fit Finlay, and the Mamalukes and Disco Inferno vs. Three Count… Gene Okerlund interviews the Maestro and Symphony in the back…Mostly, it’s the Maestro yelling at Gene after Gene wonders why the Maestro’s not on all the billboards in Vegas like Wayne Newton and Rod Stewart…Symphony does drop a HOW RUDE exactly like Stephanie Tanner at the end, though… The nWo chatters backstage, and WCW wouldn’t be dumb enough to strip Sid just to put the belt right back on him tonight, would they?...At this point, just have a fuck finish and then put it on Sid at SuperBrawl so he can get crowned on PPV…This rapid title switch stuff is yet another thing that I think Vince Russo gets all or most of the blame for…However, the title switch nonsense in 2000 is at least half of Sullivan/Nash/Ferrara’s fault just based on the timing…Five title switches in a month if counting VACANT as a champ!...Anyway, someone delivers some gambling equipment to the nWo dressing room… The Maestro (w/Symphony) comes to the ring to face Screamin’ Norman Smiley (w/many Vegas showgirls)…Smiley is nattily attired, to boot…Tenay: “He’s a picture of sartorial splendor!”…Tony S. is impressed with Tenay's wordplay…Smiley and the showgirls do a flash Big Wiggle…So, the showgirls are still in the ring when the Maestro jumps Smiley and then initiates an obligabrawl at ringside that incorporates a ladder, a chair, and eventually some other plunder…This is a hardcore bout, which I didn’t know until Tenay pointed out that this is legal…They brawl backstage…Smiley lands a swinging stalling slam through a table…Smiley huffs air and sounds exactly like Eric Andre after the latter destroys his set at the beginning of his eponymous show…The finish is INCREDIBLY DUMB…Smiley is crawling around looking for plunder, spots THE KISS DEMON, and faints in fear…The Maestro covers him for three…The not-Crush KISS Demon does that tongue waggle thing…Glad to see they finally found something for Dale Torborg to do (other than blowing out his knee)… The Total Package and Liz stand in the back as Package pumps up his peaks...They talk about sending a message to Buff by using a baseball bat and a commemorative ringside chair with a Sting logo on it… TAFKAPI (w/Paisley) is also in the World Cruiserweight Championship tournament…He faces Kid Romeo, who I’m pretty sure has been winning matches on WCWSN, at least…That’s probably good enough to get him into a tournament where the last few champs include Lenny Lane, Madusa, and Oklahoma…And yes, I ordered them from “ehhhhhh no” to “yuck!” to YUUUUUUUUUUUUCK to illustrate how we went from bad to worse to worst…Speaking of Lane, here’s S&P and Miss Hancock…Lenny and Lodi have ditched the suits, to Miss Hancock’s dismay, and they’re done with this gimmick that Russo gave them…Uh, what?...We miss most of this match looking at S&P and then Stacy’s legs, but what we see is solid…Paisley yanks Romeo off a cover after a missile dropkick…TAFKAPI hits an inverted gourdbuster known as, of course, the Paisley Park for three…Speaking of Paisley, she’s an exception to my “not a fan of unnaturally colored hair” stance…Aw, she looks good in anything… The nWo hangs out at their mini-casino and are disappointed in the booked entertainment being a Wayne Newton impersonator rather than an Elvis Presley impersonator… The KISS Demon is a total waste of money…Also, he’s here…Are they going to stick Asya with him?...Huh, his opponent is Terry Funk…Glad to see we’re still getting the occasional WCW-ass WCW matchup on these shows even into 2000…OK, so Funk hits a series of headbutts on the Demon, but falls over himself…However, unlike against Bam Bam, who took control after their headbutt spots, Funk’s back up first with more headbutts…We need an anthropologic study on the pro wrestling hierarchy of headbutts…Why can’t I be a trust fund baby who can get an anthropology Ph.D while writing about American pro wrestling?....Funk controls and gets two off a neckbreaker…He doesn’t like that count and swings at Nick Patrick, who dodges…The Demon headbutts Funk in the junk and hits a double-underhook suplex…What a weird match…It’s not too charming, but it is a uniquity…Funk wins with a fucking Oklahoma roll spot?...Then swings at Nick Patrick again as Patrick escapes the ring?...Yeah, full on uniquity, but just not very charming… Vampiro and Billy Kidman hook it up in a rematch…They go outside and have a spirited obligabrawl…Vampiro presses Kidman onto the broadcast table in a cool spot…I think I like this pairing…They’re both getting pushes and working hard against one another…Vampiro gets two off a diving wheel kick…He tries a pop-up powerbomb next and gets Latino Frankensteiner’d rana’d for two…They trade two counts off counters…Kidman whiffs on a rebound lariat, but gets out of an electric chair position with a rollup for two…They’re just going heavy on the near falls, which is a nice change of pace from everything else on this show…Kidman pops out of a powerbomb and hits a rebound bulldog, then goes up for his first SSP in weeks of television time…He doesn’t hit it…Vamp catches him and hits a super Nail in the Coffin for three…Good stuff, let’s have them hook it up one more time on PPV…This’ll be the first match from Thunder to hit the Good Matches list since 2000 started…Nitro is still patiently waiting to get back on it in the new year (though the Nitro Kidman/Vamp match from last week was pretty solid), but hopefully they'll get one on the list before Russo comes back… The cops try to break up this unregulated gambling den the nWo has going…They ask for the guy in charge…Nash shoves the Wayne Newton impersonator into their custody…Har-fuckin’-har… The Total Package (w/Liz, awesome theme music, tearaway track suit that matches Liz’s blouse) faces off with Buff Bagwell next…Totally Buff PRE EXPL-yada yada…A match between these two obviously depends on ga-ga and character work…That’s the only way I’m deriving entertainment from this one…Buff wins a couple of lock-ups…Package throws a tantrum, and Buff mocks it off-camera…TTP hits a slow, dull beatdown…He gets a series of two counts….”Deliberate, methodical, yet totally effective” is certainly one way to put it, Tenay…Buff scores a quick two count of his own, so Package punches him in the balls…Buff makes a stickier comeback shortly after…He lands a running neckbreaker and goes up for the Blockbuster…Buff scores it and covers, so Liz gets in the ring and wallops Bagwell with the baseball bat…Package uses the bat and to destroy Buff…Security stops him before he can Pillmanize Buff’s arm… Promo: Three Count signs autographs at Las Vegas’s own Nitro Grill…Three Count is put in the basement and has no fans at their tables, even when they pretend to be the Backstreet Boys…Disco and the Mamalukes walk up and mock them…The audio is poor, but we catch most of what they say (simple insults) before they brawl… Back in the ring, Three Count dances…Hey, they’re cut off by these sorry-ass mobsters…Three Count hits a trio dive to the mobsters as they hit ringside…Moore and Helms drill Vito with some nice combo offense…Moore does his dancing legdrop…There’s always a pocket of fans chanting BORING here in Vegas when they don’t recognize one of the newer acts…Vegas sucks as a wrestling town…It’s a more expensive Disney/Universal Studios set…Vito finally powerbombs his way out of ten punches in the corner from Helms… Vito and the Bull double up on Helms…The Bull lands stomps and a nice press slam…Disco tags in, kicks the shit out of Helms in the corner, and lands a side Russian, but he whiffs on his dancing second-rope elbow…Karagias and the Bull hit stereo tags, and Karagias gets the best of their brawl…After a couple of quick tags, Helms hip tosses Moore onto Vito for two count…That’s when the match breaks down…The Mamalukes bury Moore with a double hip toss into a slam…It’s so impactful that it gets a pop…Disco hits Moore with a Chartbuster, and the Bull covers for three…Moore and Helms bouncing around for these guys got the Mamalukes over with the crowd…This was another strong match…PUSH THREE COUNT… Funk and Arn walk around backstage looking for Sid… Nash cribs the universally-considered funnier one of the Belushi Brothers to fire up the rest of his flunkies after their gambling equipment is confiscated… Booker T. (w/Midnight) is attacked in the aisle by Jerry Flynn…We already jobbed Booker to Flynn once early last year…Let’s not do it again…Flynn resoundingly wins an obligabrawl…Flynn misses a running front kick in the ring…Booker lands an axe kick, a Spinaroonie, and a Houston Side Kick…He ducks a swing and lands a flying forearm…Book advances and eats a throat thrust, but he lands a spinebuster and bridges over the top of it for three…Wow, Booker is still allowed to win matches on television?!... Funk and Arn have found Sid and promise to stand behind him in tonight’s match…Funk promises Sid that he has a plan for the nWo… Ernest Miller (w/red shoes) makes his way out…The Cat tells Las Vegas that he loves it there…He gets mostly pops for saying that…He says he loves Vegas, but not so much these fans….Then, he insults them…Finally, he dances…That’s it, that’s the segment… Gene Okerlund talks to Kimberly…Kim says that things are good with Page now…He says that Buff is cool with her ref job from a couple weeks ago…Then she says that there’s nothing she and Page can’t make it through, which SCREAMS that Kim is going to turn… Nash plots with the Harris Boys…Fit leaves Knobbs in the back before his match, but Knobbs gives Finlay a hug “for good luck” and yanks a weapon out of Fit’s pocket…Fit/Bigelow is next…Bigelow uses his size advantage to wear Finlay down…Ah, the winner of this match gets a Hardcore Championship match at SuperBrawl…Knobbs is trying to dodge Finlay…Finlay makes a comeback, but Bammer gets him in position for a diving headbutt…Bammer misses, but Finlay goes looking for the wrench that was in his pocket, can’t find it, and gives Bammer time to recover and hit a Greetings for three…Finlay catches a shot of Knobbs laughing in the back and waving the wrench around…He seems displeased about what Knobbs has done, to say the least… Here’s our main event…Sid versus Kevin Nash and Ra/oD Harris…The cage is really a cell, actually…This should be called a Caged Heat match in WCW nomenclature…I’m not even going to call this plodding brawl in which Sid yells a lot while some fans chant for him…I’ll tell you when the convoluted finish happens…After Sid makes a couple of mooted comebacks, he separates Ra/oD and Nash, then knocks out Ra/oD at ringside, enters the ring, and gets Nash to tap out to a Crippler Crossface…Cute, fellas…Very cute…And at the end, Ric Flair comes out onto the ramp and applauds Sid with no promotion or warning… WCW World Heavyweight Championship title change count: 6 (Hitman > VACANT > Benoit > VACANT > Sid > Nash > Sid)…And there’s still one Nitro to go in the month of January!... This wasn’t a particularly good Thunder and the opening angle was dumb – why not just have Sid win it with the Crippler Crossface on Nitro – but it was watchable and had a couple of good matches…Plus, they put Sid over strong, which they sorely needed to do considering the overness deficit they have in the main event…Kevin Sullivan and Company managed to barely eke out a WOO for this episode… 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirSmUgly Posted September 20 Author Share Posted September 20 (edited) Show #225 – 31 January 2000 “The one that inflicts Mark Madden on the home audience for the first time, but unfortunately not for the last time” I really do love my job, but if someone would like to pay me about a fourth of my salary to write about pro wrestling instead, I’d love to go back and do a fuller Mid-South watch-through series, get started on my Clash series that I have planned, complete the rest of this Nitro Era series…I have so many thread ideas. Alas, let’s Nitro now that I’ve got some time after getting the bills paid. Recap: Sid Vicious cannot be denied by Kevin Nash and his flunkies. Earlier today, the nWo calls Kevin Nash on the phone; Nash isn’t at the arena, but Jarrett’s side of the conversation seems to indicate that Nash has named Jarrett acting commissioner. Hall takes the phone back to see if that’s what Nash actually said, but Nash apparently has hung up already. OH NO. OH. NOOOOOOOOOO. We are joined on commentary by Tony S., Mike Tenay, and MARK FUCKING MADDEN. EVERY DEROGATORY THING THAT I EVER SAID ABOUT BOBBY HEENAN’S WCW-ERA COMMENTARY, I TAKE BACK. I TAKE IT ALL BACK. DAMMIT. FUCK! Tony S. says that Heenan is just “under the weather.” He’d better be back here next week. I’m trying to hold off on this Mark Madden run for as long as possible. Madden desperately tries to heel it up on commentary, and it sucks. Jarrett and the nWo join us in the arena to chat for a bit. Jarrett is calling the shots tonight! Scott Steiner has the ladies take off their nWo t-shirts to show their well-framed boobs that are emphasized by their carefully chosen outfits because he’s not into the “cornfed heifers” in Wilkes-Barre. He calls everyone “white trash,” which is okay if he says it. The Messrs. Scott induct the Harris Boys into the nWo, and I’m glad that they aren’t making the mistake of watering this elite stable down like they did in 1996 and 1997. WCW’s bookers: always learning, always growing! We’re in WWF country, so the crowd chants ASSHOLE at Jarrett even though Jarrett’s heeling is frankly mediocre. Jarrett books Sid’s first PPV title defense against, wow, never saw this coming, Jeff Jarrett! He then books a six-man tag for later tonight: Jeff Jarrett and the Harris Boys against Sid and two secret opponents partners (his mistake, not mine). He says CHIZZAMP. He declares that he is open to being bribed by wrestlers if they want certain matches made. He was VERY BAD at this promo role. Other matches for tonight: The Mamalukes defend the tag titles against David Flair and Crowbar in a Bensonhurst Street Fight; Booker T. vs. Big T. Also, Ric Flair will be in the building, but not necessarily in a match [Editor's note: That's a technically incorrect statement about Flair's involvement, but in practice, this ends up being accurate]. Sid and Ric Flair show up to the arena. Separately, not together. J. Biggs is pitching Stevie Ray and Big T. on something in the backstage area. Stevie is engaged, but T. looks skeptical, which is actually a nice callback to ol’ Ahmed Johnson not trusting the former legal counsel for the Nation of Domination. Arn Anderson and Terry Funk talk, also in the backstage area; Arn wants to hit the nWo tonight while they’re down a man, but Funk is more interested in Ric Flair's whereabouts. Arn is not nearly as interested in talking about Flair's location and just sort of points Funk down a hall. Uh, that was heelish. Don’t tell me Flair is going to come back, but he and Arn are turning heel almost immediately. Lash LeRoux is in our first match of the night; he enters the ring about fourteen-and-a-quarter minutes into the show, annoyingly enough. LeRoux wrestles Evan Karagias (w/Shane Helms and Shannon Moore), who comes out to his old rock theme and not the much better ‘90s pop theme that should be playing now. LeRoux jumps Three Count before they can dance, but Karagias comes back with a power slam. LeRoux gets some control, but Helms and Moore yank him outside and allow Karagias to land a springboard crossbody. Karagias follows up with a shoulder to the gut, but he gets punched away while trying a superplex or Latino Frankensteiner and is summarily dropkicked. LeRoux tries a Bourbon Street Blues, but bounces off the ropes before landing his punch and gets dumped outside by Helms and Moore. The interfering Three Count members hold Lash for a baseball slide, but he moves and Karagias hits them instead. LeRoux follows up with a dive that clears out Moore and helms, but Karagias hides behind them and gets back in the ring so he can meet Lash with boots when LeRoux finally slides back into the ring. For some reason, the ref just lets the heels cheat in full view, but it doesn’t matter, as Lash lands a head-cradled side Russian leg sweep that he's named the Whiplash 2000 for the win. That match was very bad. Holy shit, it was clunky and awkward. How about letting the good members in Three Count wrestle instead next time? Da/oR berates catering for serving sandwiches rather than lobster and steak. These dopes are already too big for their britches. PSA: Dustin Rhodes cuts a DON’T TRY THIS AT HOME PSA, WCW style. Okerlund tries to interview David Flair and Crowbar backstage. Flair is on freak-out mode, but Crowbar does some ridiculous old-timey hype for the match and calls them SUPLAYS, Gordon Solie-style. The Mamalukes run up and start the tag match right there in the interview. They brawl outside into the snow, then back inside. It sucks, man; this booking committee must have borrowed the snow shovel that Davey attacks Vito with because each week, they just dig deeper and deeper. Disco Inferno is on commentary for this one, by the way. They brawl into the ring. There’s a lot of plunder. I don’t care. Disco talks about how great a manager he is and insists on being called a “paisan” rather than a “mamaluke.” Apparently, the latter term describes what we would call a “knucklehead.” Finally, something good happens during this match, and by that, I mean that Miss Hancock walks out holding a clipboard and wearing a short skirt. I also get a kick out of Daffney laughing at Vito or the Bull whiffing on moves. Crowbar does deserve better, though. He’s a fun worker who actually does wrestling moves in a hardcore wrestling match because he understands that it is still a WRESTLING match. Disco quotes Mighty Mouse and/or Andy Kaufman, then jumps in the ring to save the Mamalukes from certain defeat. That goes well for Vito, who uses the help to land a diving elbow on Crowbar through a table. This move gets three. The poor, poor tag titles. Brian Knobbs knocks on the nWo's locker room door and waves a bunch of money at Jarrett, who actually makes me laugh by deadpanning, “I guess you know the password” before inviting Knobbs in to do some under-the-table dealing. Well, over-the-table dealing, since he said he was going to take bribes openly. You get the idea. There’s a break, and after that break, Knobbs asks if he’s got enough money to get Fit Finlay booked against the Total Package. Jarrett accepts the money and then uses this wording: “Fit Finlay and Total Package, they’ll be in the same ring tonight.” He did not specify that they'd be wrestling one another in that ring, so let’s see if that wording was deliberate or not. Booker T. comes to the ring, but his music cuts out suddenly. *sigh*, let’s hurry up and do this dumb shit. J. Biggs shows up at the top of the ramp and explains that Book's theme is the property of Harlem Heat Incorporated, but if that’s true, someone should sue HHI for illegal sampling. Anyway, they’re stripping Booker of his music and soon enough his T. GOD, WCW FUCKING SUCKS. Ahmed Big T. hand cranks a middle finger at a fan in the crowd; the camera slowly pans away before he fully extends his finger. Biggs has some new jobber music play in place of Booker’s theme instead. On top of that, he claims that the “T” in Booker T. is also owned by Harlem Heat even though the T. stands for TIO, AS IN BOOKER’S LEGAL MIDDLE NAME, GODDAMMIT THIS ANGLE FUCKING SUCKS, IT'S GODDAM NONSENSE EVEN FOR PRO WRESTLING. This show sucks. Hurry up and fuck off with this segment. Why the fuck are we doing this to Booker? He’s over, he has some great fiery babyface offense, and you’re making him feud with the 2000 version of Ahmed Johnson? Biggs runs down Booker some more, and I don’t even give one tiny pebbly shit. Midnight comes up behind him and marches him to the ring – Stevie and Big T. left the stage in the meantime – and she tosses him to Booker in the ring. Booker bats him around a bit until Stevie and Big T. come to the ring for the heel save. Stevie said that Booker would have to go back to the G.I. Bro gimmick in this segment, and that is actually going to happen. Insane. Isn’t Booker in that G.I. Bro role, once he loses his “T” in the next few weeks, up until the point he wins the world title? If so, what the fuck?! Three Count attacks Norman Smiley backstage. Jarrett did in fact word things very specifically; he makes Fit Finlay the special referee for a Knobbs/TTP match later tonight. Scott Steiner: “HE’S FAT, don’t trust him,” about Knobbs, I think. Jarrett basically claims that he didn't get quite enough bribe money to make the exact match that Knobbs wanted. Knobbs sees all this on a monitor in the locker room and goes ballistic. Uh, wouldn’t this just deter other wrestlers from trying to bribe Jarrett? If he’s just going to cosplay a malicious djinn when he grants wishes, why bother paying him in the first place? Smiley tries to hide in the KISS Demon’s casket, but it closes on him. Whatever. Billy Kidman (w/Torrie Wilson) is obviously over in Pennsylvania tonight, considering he's originally from here. Then again, you can't say the same for Brian Knobbs's sorry ass. Kidman has a return match with THE WALL, BROTHER because Kidman is getting a push as a legit star to keep him from trying to leave WCW. He’s not a legit star in that way, unfortunately. He’s a key part of the roster who should absolutely be U.S. Champion at some point this year, but that's his ceiling. TW,B hits a press slam and a mediocre backbreaker in slow motion. Kidman tries a sunset flip and gets choke bombed, sort of. It was more of a choke powerdrop. TW,B scores a series of two counts, but he tries to play Kidman’s game by setting Kidman up for a superplex and Kidman fights him off with punches, a missile dropkick, and a rana for two. Kidman tries a top-rope crossbody next, but gets caught and front slammed. TW,B signals for the goozle, but Vampiro runs down as Torrie draws the ref’s attention. In a TERRIBLE finish, TW,B lifts Kidman in the goozle. Vampiro lands a diving back kick on Kidman, and that somehow knocks TW,B out for three seconds as Kidman falls backward on top of him. These Nitros might be somehow worse than the Nash or Russo-Ferrara Nitros. They’re just so bad, but on top of it, everything on these Nitros is bad for longer. Again, Russo at least rushes through bad stuff. If the show is ALL bad stuff, that means the show just feels like you got a hundred bad segments, which makes it feel worse in the moment. However, with some distance, I think I prefer that to fifteen bad segments, each of which goes on forever. At least some of these Nash shows had something cool in them. Team Madness and heel champ DDP were highlights. There are no highlights in the Sullivan Redux Era. I guess Gene Okerlund has theme music now? He gets played to the ring so that he can introduce Ric Flair. Flair decided not to run for governor of North Carolina, quite possibly because of his checkered background. I judge this to be a good decision that more potential candidates for the governorship of North Carolina should consider making both now and in the future! Flair does some sports-team cheap pop stuff to start his promo. Well, he does say that he’s better than a bunch of Pittsburgh-area athletes and threatens to bang some fan’s significant other, so maybe he’s a tweener? I don’t know. Flair does boilerplate old man Flair stuff in this promo for longer than I’m interested in it. Flair complains that Russo and Ferrara wanted him to be a barely-wrestling commissioner character, which is true, actually. Flair wants to wrestle until he’s decrepit even if it’s not a great idea for him to do that, so he declined said television role. He wants to wrestle, dammit! And also he wants to talk a whole lot, but not at the level of sheer entertainment that ‘80s Flair once reached. Next, Ric Flair calls out Terry Funk for some reason. Well, I guess it’s because they have beef on sight after 1989 and the table piledriver incident. That’s probably it. Flair is not a fan of Funk, is the long and short of it, and he’s fiending for a confrontation. Flair blasphemes a bit while we wait for Funk, who gets booed when he shows up because Flair is an eternal babyface in this company. Funk: FLAAAAAAAAAAIR, YOU BANANA-NOSED, HORSE-TOOTHED, EVIL BASTARD. Funk thinks that Flair is jealous of him even though Flair is well-known, a decorated champ, etc., and then he says why he thinks that Flair is jealous of him, and the reason surprised me. Funk, of all things, quotes Mick Foley in Have a Nice Day as heavily preferring Funk to Flair. He thinks that’s the center of Flair’s beef with him. Funk pretty much says that just because another world champ prefers Funk to Flair, Ric would rather beef with Funk instead of joining up to fight the nWo. Then he points out Ric Flair’s questionable parenting of that nutbar David by, uh, proposing some alternate questionable parenting techniques. Let’s have a mic battle! Flair is like FUCK MICK FOLEY ANY-FUCKIN-WAY, I HEADLINED A LOT OF BIG SHOWS, and he calls Funk’s ranch a “chicken ranch,” and further than that, he threatens to “slap the shit” out of Funk before pointing out the disparity in the number of world title reigns each man has had. Funk slowly walks down to the ring. Flair laughs at Funk’s t-shirt, which declares the latter a living legend. Funk punches Flair and locks on a spinning toehold, and I’m with Funk, personally. Fuck Ric Flair from a kayfabe standpoint at the very least. He's in the wrong for being a dick and instigating this argument. Anyway, this is unfortunately a heatless brawl because Funk isn’t over at all with WCW crowds, which is wild to me. You’d think that Funk would get some heat or pops in Pennsylvania as a former ECW alum, at least. Jeff Jarrett, watching this segment in the back, comments, “Looks like we just found Sid two partners.” Gene Okerlund interviews Sid Vicious in the back, who is annoyed by how Jarrett is booking him tonight. He plans to work out this annoyance by powerbombing at least one person and maybe even multiple people should we all be so lucky. Miss Hancock is chilling out as we get a Hitchcockian slow pan up her bare legs and torso before we finally settle the shot on her face. Lenny and Lodi pop up in their regular clothing and pretty much tell her that now that they got her over, they’re done with this dumb gimmick. Hancock says they should be lucky to even have a job after “that stunt they pulled” what with pretending to be gay lovers-slash-brothers, but Lenny is like WOW, SO LUCKY TO BE WORKING IN THIS SHITTY COMPANY, SUUUUURE and Lodi hates every gimmick he gets, and what in fuck was the point of this segment, really? WCW sucks and WCW creative comes up with bad gimmicks, and oh yeah, in case you were starting to suspend disbelief, this is a booked show and not a legit competition. This was a Ferrara segment, I just know it. I still am glad that I get to sit down and write about pro wrestling, but man, what is up with these Nitros? I thought that these Nitros would be an oasis between Russo runs, and I’m shocked at how abject they are. The Total Package and Liz hit the ring. After some posing from Package, Fit Finlay enters in his ref shirt, and black hole of suck Brian Knobbs follows. Finlay indicates that the Pit Stop is an illegal move in between some bad brawling, but Knobbs scores one anyway. There’s an obligabrawl. There are chokes. Why is this match so long? It’s maybe six minutes with entrances, but I think the workers did everything they needed to do in half that time. The crowd’s intermittent BORING chant means that they agree with me. Tony S.: “Knobbs…almost blew himself up with those three legdrops.” Almost, Tony? So, Finlay just watches Liz hit Knobbs with a bat, then decides to stroll out and let Package and Liz Pillmanize Knobbs’s wrist. The match mercifully ends. Package threatens Sting and Hulk Hogan both on his way out of the ring. Norman Smiley exits the coffin, and he’s dressed as the KISS Demon. Sure. Why not. The mysterious and otherworldly KISS Demon, uh, complains to some cops about his gear being stolen from his coffin in a regular dude voice. Well, that certainly takes some of the mystery and otherworldliness out of the character! Norman Smiley, dressed in the Demon garb, is attacked by Three Count as soon as he hits the ring. Helms lands a Frog Splash for two, then a side Russian for another two – he’s actually the legal guy in the ring. Helms does a shitty dancing falling chop. I mean that the dancing is shitty (on purpose), not the chop. Smiley and his Big Wiggle are over, and he teases it while Tony S. promises that Hulk Hogan will be on Thunder this Wednesday. I just deeply sighed after hearing that news. Anyway, Helms manages an airplane spin on Norm, but Norm dizzily topples into the ropes when Helms tries to go to the air to follow up. Norm lands a giant swing in this utterly bizarre match that is a good finish away from being a Charming Uniquity. Smiley wiggles, then knocks Karagias and Moore off the apron. Helms jumps him with a boot, but runs himself into a Norman Conquest and has no choice but to tap out. Dale Torborg leads the cops out to arrest Norm for larceny; Norm tosses Shannon Moore onto Helms and Karagias, then escapes pursuit by running into the crowd. Not good enough for the list, but definitely the first time all show that I’ve perked up a bit. Okerlund, in an interview backstage, says that Dallas and Kim can move on with their lives. Not if you keep bringing up their marital problems, Okerlund. Disco and the Mamalukes walk up behind them, and Disco may or may not have pinched Kim’s ass. Kim slaps Disco after Disco calls her a “bimbo,” and Page follows up with an attack of his own. After a commercial break, Page is supposed to come out for a match against Disco, but Disco is busy having a conversation with someone in the back about how Kim's not attractive enough to get her ass pinched by him. I guess the story that the commentators want to tell is that Vito or the Bull actually did it, and not Disco, but I don’t care. Why is every feud that DDP has about someone harassing, sleeping with, or otherwise having a questionable interaction with Kimberly? So, Page attacks Disco while he denies touching Kim, and they brawl from the back and into the ring. Page dominates until Disco finagles a back kick to the balls; he follows up with a swinging neckbreaker for two. Disco hits a side Russian and an elbowdrop for two; he takes off his shirt and tosses it in Kimberly’s face in between those moves. Disco controls for a short while, but he gets lax in his serious approach to the match, and Page makes a comeback. DDP lands a sit-out powerbomb, then calls for a Diamond Cutter that Disco blocks with a jawbreaker. Disco runs the ropes and is able to also block an arm drag, but Page transitions into a Diamond Cutter for three. The Mamalukes march down and check on Disco as the Pages leave the ring. Thankfully, it’s main event time. There is supposed to be intrigue here about whether Arn will side with Flair or Funk, but I just don’t give a shit. Sorry, but Funk/Flair in 2000 doesn’t excite me. Funny enough, as I’ve said before, I am looking forward to Dusty/Flair in 2001. I’m not entirely against the over-fifty set wrestling one another. This particular burgeoning feud just feels ice cold in every way. In a funny spot, Sid is basking in the adulation of the crowd and momentarily has his back turned in the aisle as Jarrett and the Harrises run down and attack poor Terry Funk. Sid eventually turns back around and pairs off with Jarrett, but then he switches off with Da/oR as Jarrett and Ra/oD attack Funk, and look, it’s an aisle brawl and Ric Flair is nowhere to be seen. That's all you need to know about this part of the match. A chair gets involved in the proceedings. Sid is very over, at least. Funk gets clattered onto the announcer’s desk while Sid fights off Da/oR and Jarrett in the ring. Sid tries a powerbomb, but a Harris Boy breaks it up. The match actually reformulates into a standard tag match with three or four minutes to go with Funk as FIP. Funk finally fights through a bunch of heel offense and gets a hot tag to Sid, which is when Ric Flair runs out and attacks Funk. That leaves Sid alone with three opponents. That doesn’t keep Sid from hitting Ra/oD with a powerbomb, but it does keep him from winning the match because Jarrett clocks Sid with a guitar shortly afterward and gets three. Bad match. How can a show so ordinary be so bad? I can’t point to one thing that was especially egregious, but it was all quite dire television except for the part where I wanted a longer Norman Smiley/Shane Helms bout, which I hope happens in the next few months. -40 out of 5 Stinger Splashes. Edited September 22 by SirSmUgly 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirSmUgly Posted September 21 Author Share Posted September 21 Thunder Interlude – show number ninety-seven – 2 February 2000 "The WCW Gang is in such a dismal state that the WWE Network doesn't bother to include whole chunks of the show" Let’s very briefly Thunder…There are only an hour and eight minutes in this show…I’m going to watch through, then go back and add any cut segments…There has to be at least one cut segment as this is twenty-ish minutes shorter than usual Thunder eps on the Network…That, or Thunder went to ninety minutes going forward, which would rule hard… Anyway, after a recap of the big angles on Nitro, we are now in full-on taped Thunder mode… Unfortunately, “Rockhouse” hits…This might be the worst configuration of the nWo just on the basis of being full of dudes who don’t vibe and having shifting membership due to injuries…Hall was in, then hurt, and is now back, but will be gone again soon, this time for good…The Hitman got hurt, and now he’s gone for good…Nash is out with an ankle injury now and will be gone for a while, if the folks on commentary are to be believed… Hall teases a HEY YO, but never says it…Scott Steiner talks about how good he is at sex, then yells at some guy LOOKIT THAT FAT BITCH NEXT TO YOU, I WOULDN’T BE CAUGHT DEAD WITH HER…Jarrett bores everyone to death…We’re driving this Triple Threat Theatre deal into the ground…Jarrett books Sid in three matches tonight…Versus Mike Rotundo/a in a Submission Match…Versus Rick Steiner in a Hardcore Match…and Versus the Harris Boys in a Handicap Caged Heat Match…He says CHIZZAMP again…He also says SLAPASS…He once again announces that he’s accepting bribes…Let’s see who is dumb enough to pay him after seeing what happened to Brian Knobbs on Monday…This segment wasn’t quite as bad as Hogan-era nWo gabfests, but it wasn’t that far off!... Other matches tonight…DDP vs. The Machine, which I think is legendarily bad, isn’t it, or has a legendarily bad sequence?...Also, Vampiro vs. Billy Kidman vs. THE WALL, BROTHER in a Triple Threat Match…David Flair and Crowbar are facing the Mamalukes once again…Norman Smiley will wrestle the KISS Demon… As far as SuperBrawl goes, Ric Flair vs. Terry Funk is now officially on tap… Who is booking these shows?...Is Nash sending in dumb ideas from Scottsdale as he recuperates?...Is it just a pilled-up Sullivan and that complete dope Ferrara driving these shows?...Maybe Terry Taylor’s also on the committee because I think he’s come back from his short WWF stint by this time…Anyway, someone needs to take the blame for all *waves arms around frantically* this nonsense… Jeff Jarrett purchases the services of Slick Johnson…It’s a reasonable pick as he’s already been the nWo ref a bunch of months back…Slick’s excited to screw over Sid in the main event of the Triple Threat Theater… Norman Smiley, still wearing the garb of his opponent, wrestles the KISS Demon…Torborg leaps out of the coffin, runs into the ring, and tries to get all his gear back…Hudson talks about Gene Simmons giving Torborg that gear…Uh, nice try, but we all remember Crush getting into the back of that vehicle!...Torborg strips Smiley of the gear, and Smiley has a smiley-face design on his underpants…AHAHAHAHA…Much funny, so hilarious!...Imagine laying out a match with Norman Smiley in it that sucks like this one does…Smiley gets a single move in, a Norman Conquest, that wins him the match…Torborg is immediately up to chase Smiley to the back… Lenny and Lodi complain about how the office doesn’t treat them with respect or even know their names, making dumb jokes along the way…They decide to name their tag team TO EXCESS…Like TOO MUCH over on the other channel, y’know?...IT’S A REFERENCE TO A WRESTLING-RELATED TAG TEAM THAT SIMILARLY WORKED A GAY GIMMICK, WHICH AUTOMATICALLY MAKES IT FUNNY…AHAHAHAHA…Lodi has his uses on this show, but Lenny Lane is a black hole of suck…These two make for consistently awful television and are two of the worst guys to grace WCW television in 1999 and 2000… We keep getting shots of this limo as everyone gets excited about Hulk Hogan…I’m of two minds about the Hulkster returning to television…One the one hand, this show badly needs star power…On the other hand, Hogan stinks and is a massive net negative at this point…Maybe if you have Hogan spend two months on TV, siloed away from the title picture and wrestling other main eventers, and then disappear again, it could work… Sid Vicious is probably going to snap a Crippler Crossface on Mike Rotundo/a in the next couple of minutes…Where is Leia Meow?...One of the most notable things about post-Russo Nitro is how quickly this company shuffles through gimmicks and acts…S&P – done…The Varsity Club – missing Sully and Meow…I feel like half the tag teams in the recent tournament aren’t even tagging together anymore…This match actually doesn’t stink because there’s not a ton to it, and Rotundo/a works the leg with some nice moves…He uses a Figure Four and an STF…Sid gets to the ropes on the latter and lands a chokeslam…Rotundo ballshots his way out of another goozle, but when he tries a Stock Market Crash, Sid slips off his shoulders and locks on a Crippler Crossface…That was perfectly acceptable televised wrestling, which you’d not expect from this combination of wrestlers…It was also short and to the point, rare for a WCW television match… Gene Okerlund, standing in a darkened hallway in the back, asks Vampiro what his whole deal is with Kidman and THE WALL, BROTHER…Vampiro tries to be mysterious about his intentions and notes that while he respects Kidman, “respect” doesn’t necessarily translate into “like”… HOLY SHIT, A BRACKET!...The WCW Cruiserweight Championship tournament is only an eight-man tourney…Let’s review it…Psicosis defeated Kaz Hayashi, TAFKAPI defeated Kid Romeo, and Lash LeRoux defeated Evan Karagias, all first-round matchups…Our last match in the first round is Shane Helms versus Shannon Moore…What the shit, why is Chavo not in this tournament?!...DAMMIT, WCW, YOU IDIOTS…We’re really going to push Lash LeRoux’s sorry ass, but not even put Chavo in the tournament?!... Whatever, at least Three Count cuts a rug before Helms and Moore wrestle a friendly bout against one another…No, wait, they didn’t even do that…They decide to maybe dance after the friendly bout…Evan Karagias joins the desk while Moore and Helms cut a pace…Like forty-five seconds in, Moore backdrops Helms to the floor, then hits a running plancha…We cut to a shot of Karagias talking about Three Count's music and Tenay pretending to like it before landing a timeworn NOT!…Tenay prefers REM to Three Count...It’s the end of the WCW cruiserweight division as we know it, looking at the brackets for this tournament, and I don't feel fine…Tenay lets us know that Madusa has arrived at this show while Helms and Moore go back and forth…It’s a fun little match, if unsubstantial (and treated as such with the focus on commentary bantering about music and Madusa rather than the match itself)…Helms whiffs on a corkscrew moonsault…Moore takes over and scores a two-count…He then manages one of the more impactful backslides I’ve seen for three…Helms and Moore hug one another after the match…Awwww… That means that our semifinal matchups in this tournament will be Psicosis vs. TAFKAPI and Lash Leroux vs. Shannon Moore...If this booking doesn't scream that Lash LeRoux is going to be the champ, I will be surprised... Madusa’s sorry ass storms into the nWo's office…Steiner tells Madusa that she’s “on the hideous side of good looking" because, you know, that's our Scotty!...Otherwise, it's nearly impossible to pick out the dialogue over the Network’s dubbed Three Count theme...I can’t hear much else…Let’s just say that their conversation seemed contentious and Jarrett is probably going to book Madusa in a no-win situation… We get a shot of the Hulkster getting out of the limo… Ah, Jeff Jarrett hires Oklahoma to book a new women’s division…I cannot wait for the Madusa/Oklahoma feud to fire up again…What a classic feud that was…Flair/Steamboat, step aside… Billy Kidman has his camera again…he films Torrie as they walk to the ring together…Vampiro and THE WALL, BROTHER join the proceedings in short order…The smaller wrestlers jump TW,B to start…They double-clothesline him to the floor before going at one another…Vampiro drills a release gutwrench suplex and throws punches at Kidman, but TW,B has time to jump in the ring and club him…TW,B pressed Kidman, then charges Vampiro with a clothesline…Vampiro tosses Kidman into TW,B, who clocks Kidman…Kidman gets him back by clubbing TW,B with a chair while Torrie distracts the ref…Vamp wants to swing it, too, but Kidman tosses it to him and dropkicks it into him…TW,B tosses Kidman to the floor and goes up top…Vamp follows and tries to position for a super Nail in the Coffin, but he loses that fight and gets super chokeslammed for three…These matches are too short to be meaningful or particularly interesting…Oh WCW, you are so predictable…Even when you course correct, you find a way to overcorrect somehow… Gene Okerlund interviews Disco and the ‘lukes backstage…This match against Dopey Dave and Crowbar is non-title…Anyway, this promo sucks, and it’s only made worse when Lenny and Lodi Lane and Idol show up…They jaw at the ‘lukes and challenge them…The ‘lukes are dismissive… Rick Steiner meets Sid as Sid gets in the ring…These dudes clubber before they spill outside…From Ricky helping Sid limp away from the Goldberg match at Havoc to these two former close friends having a struggle suplex-through-a-table spot…Boy, their kayfabe relationship has gone through a lot these past few months, huh?...Sid kicks out of a cover on the table spot at 2.9…That spot was the high point of this one…The rest of this brawl is routine plundah-and-guardrail-whip stuff…An arm slips out from behind a curtain on the stage and hits Rick Steiner in the neck with a bat, accidentally, I think…That same arm, which looks suspiciously like Jeff Jarrett’s, swings again, clatters Sid, and knocks Sid on top of Steiner for three…These finishes, man…WCW, I tell you…That was the least objectionable Rick Steiner hardcore match on a random Thunder that there probably could ever be besides that fucking finish… So, we come back to Hogan getting back into his limo and LEAVING…That means his segment was edited out…Thanks to the magic of TikTok, there is at least some of that interview segment that I can watch…Let me do that and report back…Eh, he complains about the bookers and the young dudes, then says that he’s been talking to Sting and Goldberg and that he decided to come back to face TTP at SuperBrawl because TTP’s been name-dropping him…It was a sub-mediocre promo, as is Hogan’s forte… Diamond Dallas Page and Kimberly make it to the ring to face the Machine, and this is exactly what I mean about WCW being so fucking random…They (re-)debut this guy and then what?...He has a bad debut and then nothing?...It’s like how randomly the Maestro was and is deployed…And WCW is not, and never was, going to get a mask-wearing Emery Hale over…This is exactly the type of stuff that makes WCW look bush league…Page was an actual star at one point, and he doesn’t feel like one anymore…I think it’s time to complain about Page’s booking since after the time he beat the Giant at Starrcade 1998…Even when WCW put the big gold on him in 1999 and he responded being a hot heel, they completely screwed things up with him…This match isn’t bad or good…Hale’s not any good and has a low-impact side Russian…OH YEAH, PAGE HIT THE WRONG ROPE AND THE MACHINE CROTCHED HIMSELF ANYWAY…HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…AHAHAHAHAaaaaaaa…Oh man…Page lands a floatover Diamond Cutter for three shortly after…This era of WCW between the Russo ones reminds me of 1991 WCW…Poorly deployed and booked talent who could do some good television if any one in creative had a brain, all mixed in with guys who pretty much stink… Speaking of guys who pretty much stink, Tank Abbott is in our next match… Before that match, Gene Okerlund interviews Arn Anderson, who remembers back to a day before your Crow Stings and your Johnny B. Badds when wrestling didn’t suck complete ass…He respects the veterans and BACK IN MY DAY, etc….Arn can’t choose between Flair and Funk, both of whom have been good pals to him…Rather, he’s on the side of WCW, and he begs Flair and Funk to make up and join together against the least dangerous version of the nWo this side of the B-Team… Alright, now to Tank, who squashes Villano IV…He knocks out Villano V while he’s at it… The Harris Boys cut a shitty promo on Sid in the back… Arn Anderson and Mike Graham talk about how awesome Big Vito is, which is how you know this is all a work…Terry Funk cuts in on their conversation and demands that Arn side with him…Arn basically is like I SAID WHAT I SAID, but Funk ignores that and continues to demand that Arn join him…Arn leaves the convo…Zero intrigue… The Mamalukes (w/Disco Inferno) face Dopey Dave and Crowbar (w/Daffney)…Ms. Hancock shows up to check out David Flair, which is absurd…Daffney gets in her grill…Hancock walks away…Crowbar is trying to have a wrestling match in the meantime…Disco talks about Hogan being mistaken because these young guys ARE superstars…Well, not these young guys…Dopey Dave tags in and gets beaten up…Davey as FIP is a thing that happens…Eventually, Crowbar gets a hot tag and pins Vito when Dave uses his crowbar to knock Vito out… Uh, the Sid Vicious/Harris Boys match is also not on this recording…A quick glance at DDT Digest tells me that Sid won it with a powerbomb before being attacked by the rest of the nWo…I did a series of searches, but no luck on YouTube, DailyMotion, or TikTok…You know, it’s not really that important…It won’t move my score one iota either way…OWWWWWWW…On one final note, I can’t wait for Russo and Bischoff to get back into power…One, it will be bad, but incredibly dumb in a sometimes entertaining way as opposed to regular ol' bad and deadly boring besides…Two, it gets us closer to these Thunder episodes actually being watchable at some point in Fall 2000… 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
caley Posted September 22 Share Posted September 22 5 hours ago, SirSmUgly said: OH YEAH, PAGE HIT THE WRONG ROPE AND THE MACHINE CROTCHED HIMSELF ANYWAY…HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…AHAHAHAHAaaaaaaa…Oh man… I didn'r remember this, looked it up and it is AMAZING. The way he leaps, anyways, crotch-first onto the ropes then yells really loud really baffles the crowd, especially on that side as it genuinely looks like Machine climbed to the top and just leapt off the top, crotch-first onto the ropes because he wanted to. Maybe they should have made a gimmick of this. He already had the gimp-ish mask, make him a BDSM guy who really ENJOYS getting beaten up or injuring himself! 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirSmUgly Posted September 22 Author Share Posted September 22 13 hours ago, caley said: I didn'r remember this, looked it up and it is AMAZING. The way he leaps, anyways, crotch-first onto the ropes then yells really loud really baffles the crowd, especially on that side as it genuinely looks like Machine climbed to the top and just leapt off the top, crotch-first onto the ropes because he wanted to. Maybe they should have made a gimmick of this. He already had the gimp-ish mask, make him a BDSM guy who really ENJOYS getting beaten up or injuring himself! Ah, if only he'd debuted when Russo was back in charge! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirSmUgly Posted September 22 Author Share Posted September 22 Show #226 – 7 February 2000 “The one with a classic Scott Steiner rant and a small bright spot in the gloom that is unsurprisingly supplied by Terry Funk and Arn Anderson” Let’s NITROOOOOOOOOOOoh man, there are still two more weeks of shows until SuperBrawl. The build to Jarrett/Sid isn’t what I’d describe as “compelling.” Three Count is apparently in the ring, maybe, and their dubbed song plays over Jeff Jarrett yammering on about his plans for Terry Funk and Sid Vicious. No, wait, we cut to the opening of the show in the arena. Fireworks. Ah, okay, here’s Three Count in the center of the ring. I slam the mute button and play some of Jimmy Hart’s finest work while Evan Karagias promotes a (phantom, I assume) “win a date with Three Count” contest. Norman Smiley has turned heel in the production truck, where he fucks with Three Count’s music and, as a result, their terrible dance routine. I’m still jammin’ on mute, though. WE WATCH T-R-L ON M-T-V, EVERYBODY THREE COUNT, ONE TWO THREE. I was singing this theme in the kitchen the other day and my wife walked in and simply commented, “I feel seen,” which cracked me up. Norman Smiley hits the ring to a solid pop that indicates that maybe he should be pushed a little beyond his lower-midcard comedy character gimmick. Smiley faces Evan Karagias in the opener. Norm doesn’t have too much trouble with Karagias; he lands a nice vertical suplex and hits a Big Wiggle before Karagias lands a bulldog. Three Count tries to get involved, but Norm fights through the subterfuge and reverses a rollup that gets three with a little tug of the tights. Smiley challenges all of Three Count to a handicap match at SuperBrawl after the bout. This was far too short to be good, but fans really dig Smiley’s act. Production cuts to a cameraperson on the move for no reason during this opening from Tony S. and Mark Madden. Here are some matches for tonight: Terry Funk vs. David Flair in an I Quit Match; the KISS Demon against Billy Kidman; Booker T. against THE WALL, BROTHER; and Stevie Ray vs. Disco Inferno. This all sounds dismal. Backstage, J. Biggs – in a full back brace after being attacked by Booker last week – has some cops confiscate Booker’s gear because this feud is so dumb. I’m just plopping it on the Worst Feuds list right now. Wait, no, I just checked, and I already added it. I’m tempted to add it twice. Ric Flair and some ladies get out of a limo. Scott Steiner and some ladies walk to the ring. Also, Scott Hall, the Harris Boys and Jeff Jarrett are there. I think I hate the nWo. It was good for like four months and then bad for years. I think if they’d booked the Wolfpac better, the nWo name could have been salvaged. Hall teases a HEY YO while Madden yells SAYYYYY ITTTTTTT on commentary, which is very annoying. Hall is not saying his big catchphrase anymore; he also hands the mic to Ra/oD Harris instead of talking. That’s some mega-heel shit right there. Steiner is dressed like the Godfather over on the other channel – or is he the Goodfather yet? I forget – and he talks about how great he is at sex some more. The ladies unconvincingly confirm this supposed fact. Then, oh boy, we maybe won’t be seeing Scott Steiner for a few shows because Steiner hits his EXTREMELY WELL KNOWN RANT where he runs down Ric Flair and his CROOKED, YELLOW TEETH. He hates THE NATURE BOY NUMBER TWOOOOO and declares that Flair’s career is dead, that Flair ran Stone Cold Steve Austin out of the company, and that he’d rather be watching ol’ Stone Cold on RAW like everybody else because WCW SUCKS. Wasn’t Stone Cold hurt at this point? Anyway, Steiner tells that "ass-kissin’, butt-suckin’, back-baaa-buu-b-backstabbin’ BASTARD" that he and WCW suck in what is a fantastic heel rant that would be effective if WCW didn’t actually suck right now. And also if the nWo didn’t suck. right now, either. Jeff Jarrett takes over on the microphone and assigns Slick Johnson as the ref for his SuperBrawl bout against Sid and then makes it a no disqualification match besides. This match might well be the genesis of the reign of McGillicuddy Jarrett’s love of gaga-ful fuck nonsense in main event title matches. Then, he books Sid against Scott Hall in the main event, which Hall is not particularly pleased with. Hall won’t be around long enough to make this budding Hall vs. Jarrett feud work, which is a shame as Hall has never actually been a babyface during this whole WCW run and the crowd would LOOOOOOOOOOVE a Scott Hall babyface run. Booker T. complains about all the stuff Stevie and Company took from him, but tells Midnight that they’ll never take his dignity. OK. Gene Okerlund attempts to interview David Flair backstage while Crowbar and Daffney thumb wrestle behind them. Daffney wins and celebrates; she gives him a rematch and Crowbar uses his other hand as “outside interference” to win that one. That was pretty funny. Also, Dave said something about Terry Funk. Booker T. (w/Midnight) comes out to Wish.com Disney on Ice music because that’s really going to get a guy over. This might be the angle that I hate the most in this whole watch, and I say that as someone who has hated a whole lot of angles during this watch-through. I’d rather watch Randy Savage try and fail to dump feces on other main eventers for another three months than any of this. It’s a credit to Booker's talent and charisma that he stayed over enough after what amounts to a nonsense burial to be a credible world champ in the dying months of the company. Anyway, THE WALL, BROTHER makes it to the ring. Booker hitting offense = fun. Booker selling for TW,B’s offense = not fun. There’s an obligabrawl. Booker wins the guardrail whip contest, but is attacked as he gets back in the ring after dumping TW,B into it in my least favorite transition. Ultimately, this match is fine, but Sullivan and Company desperately trying to get TW,B over is nonsense. I do like the spot where TW,B goes up and leaps right into a Houston Side Kick. Book follows with an axe kick, and Madden drops a SPINAROONIE, SPINAROONIE for the first time. That’s the one good thing he ever did on commentary, that call, as a way to help Booker stay over. And Booker needs the help because after a Book End, Book is distracted by J. Biggs and some cops coming to the ring and ends up fucking jobbing to a TW,B chokeslam before the cops arrest him for last week’s attack on Biggs. I. HATE. THIS. Brian Knobbs, cast on his wrist, busts into the nWo locker room and yells at Jeff Jarrett for SWERVIN’ him last week. Jarrett gives him a make-good, but again, with nebulous language – “You and Finlay will be in the same ring tonight.” He leaves and Jarrett books him against Bigelow, with Finlay as ref or Bigelow’s partner or who knows what. Terry Funk wants a pact with Arn Anderson, but Arn says he’s going to wait and see how Funk performs against Dopey Dave before tying himself to Funk. The Funker is displeased about this. To Excess cuts a terrible fucking promo about challenging the Mamalukes for the tag titles before going off to find them. I almost miss the Windham Brothers as tag champs at this point. Almost. It’s a Barbarian sighting! He’s just out here to get punched in the dome by Tank Abbott. Barbarian, as a former Face of Fear (he’s still wearing the tights), does better than either Villano or even Jerry Flynn, but Abbott still hangs a right hand on him after a minute to win the match. Big Al is in the crowd to taunt Tank as the latter leaves the ring. Someone’s gonna get their non-existent beard cut if they’re not careful! Crowbar knocks on the KISS Demon’s casket, then plays lead pipe guitar in front of it before Daffney screams and he goes off to find her. O…kay? The KidCam is back; Kidman flirts with Torrie as he shoot footage of her backstage. Oklahoma marches out to make a proclamation or twenty about women’s wrestling in WCW. Did WCW ever bring back their Women’s Championship, or is this just yet another nonsense angle spearheaded by this complete zero of a creative talent Ed Ferrara? He does the same “rigorous medical examination” quip that Nash did a couple weeks ago, and then, in a punny name that I deeply hate, introduces new medical doc Haywood Jeter – FUCK OFF FOR ETERNITY, WCW – as the division’s in-house doctor and cosmetic surgeon, and fuuuuuuuck me, I think this is the worst that WCW television has ever been, somehow. Basically, they’re like MADUSA IS VERY PLASTIC, HAVE YOU SEEN HER BOOBS, and I’m like, Yes, we've seen them though there is no need to make a big deal out of having seen them, and Oklahoma runs her down for getting a lot of work done. Madusa walks out, slaps the doc and kicks him, then calls Oklahoma an ASSHOLE off camera and kicks him, too. Madusa breaks the clipboard over the docs head, then uses the heel of her shoe to grind his balls, which he might have enjoyed depending on his sexual tastes. She should have charged him for that. Anyway, right to the Absolute Dirt Worst list this goes! Ric Flair and the ladies watch a monitor backstage. Gene Okerlund announces that the WCW Executive Board is once again meeting, and Terry Taylor is going to announce some BIG NEWS that will sound naturally much less big coming out of the mouth of that human bottle of skim milk, that personification of a blank envelope, that jar of low-fat mayo. After a break, we get Okerlund interviewing Taylor backstage. Taylor says that the board can yeet the special ref from the SuperBrawl main event and that they’ve decided to do so. They can also make title matches, so they make Hall/Sid a title match for later tonight. Jarrett and the nWo complain about it in their locker room. NO. ONE. COULD. POSSIBLY. CARE. Terry Funk makes it to the ring for his I Quit Match against David Flair (w/Crowbar and Daffney). Dave sends his buddies to the back, though. I suppose he wants to get his ass kicked out here alone. Funk grabs a mic before the match and asks Dave if he realizes the asswhooping he’s about to get and then offers him a chance to quit in advance of said asswhooping. David declines. Funk doesn’t really want to whoop Dave’s ass if he can whoop Ric’s instead and calls Papa Flair out to fight him in this I Quit Match instead. Dave takes a chair and batters Funk with it while Funk is yammering on and looking toward the ramp to catch a glimpse of the elder Flair. Funk takes a bunch of chair shots to the head while Davey yells YOU QUIT?! Funk does not quit. Dopey Dave gets a table and sets it up while Funk quivers in pain at ringside. Unfortunately for Davey, he loses a “whip into the guardrail” spot. Funk pulls the pads at ringside up and then piledrives Dave…not on the concrete. Ah, I see, he tries to get Dave to quit, and when Dave refuses, Funk then goes ahead and lands a piledriver on the concrete. OK, that was a nice progression of spots. Why am I out here questioning Terry Funk on how he sequences his spots? I have a whole lot of fuckin’ nerve. Ric apparently is unmoved by his dopey son catching a beat down, so Funk piledrives Dave through the table. Like son, like father! Madden fills the at-home audience in on the historical significance of the spot. The crowd chants WE WANT FLAIR, and I presume they mean Ric because they’ve got a Flair out here already. Funk gets another table, lays Dave on it, and cracks him with a chair. Funk gets the mic, climbs the ropes, and tells Ric that he’s got five seconds to get down here or he’s going to come on his son. No, wait, COME OFF on his son, sorry. Ed Ferrara’s writing has me all fucked up. Ric is still a no-show after Funk counts down the five seconds; Funk disappointedly claims, “You say I live on a chicken ranch, but I don’t have any goddam chickens like you.” Then, as he has zero interest in actually destroying Dopey Dave, he quits, though he angrily promises not to quit against Papa Ric at SuperBrawl. Funk is cast as the babyface, but the crowd desperately wants to root for Ric. This is a BAD way to book this feud, but I’m sure Ric insists on being a heel. Anyway, the Funker took what could have been a shitty segment and made something compelling out of it, so good for him. He single-handedly vaulted this match onto my Charming Uniquities list. Mike Tenay is disappointed in this whole spectacle as he watches on the same monitor that Ric and the ladies stopped in front of a few segments ago. Arn Anderson storms up, quite heated, and says that he’s now got an answer for Terry Funk. We go to break. We come back from break. Arn talks to Tenay backstage and says he’s so disgusted by Ric not saving his son that he “almost ha[s] to agree with Scott Steiner.” OK, this makes perfect sense – remember a year ago when Arn was confused by Ric dismissing his son in order to focus on the big gold? That thread actually carries through to this angle! Holy shit! This is a logical, long-term progression of the relationship between Arn, Ric, and Dopey Dave on WCW’s part! Now, if they fuck it up by having Arn inconsistently cut a turn on Funk to help Ric at SuperBrawl, they’d be tossing literally a year’s worth of character development for Arn and Ric into a dumpster, so let's hope they don't. Arn is so done with all this nonsense that he just gives up on the whole deal; he won’t support Ric or the Funker. Fair enough! Disco Inferno faces Stevie Ray (w/Big T. and J. Biggs). Please just put Stevie on color. I beg you, WCW. Please. Anyway, this match is what it is. The Mamalukes come down and confront Big T. and Biggs, so Charles Robinson leaves the ring to back them off one another before a number of refs lead the whole bunch to the back. We didn’t really miss anything in the ring. We come back to a Disco run of offense after he dodges a corner charge. He gets a two count off a side Russian, but he runs into an elbow on his own corner charge. Stevie hits a side kick and grabs a slapjack form his pants. Stevie swings for the fences and whiffs, the slapjack flying out of his hands. Disco tries to grab it and use it, but Robinson doesn’t let him, and he turns around into a Stevie Slapjack of the double-underhook style sort that costs him the match. Jeff Jarrett and Scott Hall step out of the nWo locker room, and speaking of continuity, Hall cracks me up because when Jarrett asks him if he knows why the committee made his match against Sid a title match, Hall responds with, “Yeah, because they’ve owed me since my World War 3 victory in ’97.” HOLY SHIT, that is incredible! Jarrett is freaking out about Hall possibly winning the title and what it all might mean for his SuperBrawl match, but Hall assures Jarrett that things will be okay and promises to soften up Sid for SuperBrawl. Gene Okerlund interviews Sid Vicious in the back; Sid is chill about the nWo and complains that everyone treats them OOOOOOH *waggles fingers* LIKE A SIX-HEADED MONSTER. He doesn’t seem very worried about either Hall or Jarrett, though. Bobby Heenan has been shifted to Thunder alongside Mike Tenay; that’s what Tony S. tells us on this promo for Wednesday Night Thunder. Ric Flair leaves the show with his ladies; he complains about Arn’s lack of support for him before shutting the limo door. Bam Bam Bigelow gets a shot at the WCW Hardcore Championship next up; Brian Knobbs is his opponent, of course. Knobbs argues with Fit Finlay, who is once again the ref. Plundah, plundah, plundah! This match is like every other match of this type, if at least worked with a bit of pace. The finish is the only thing that ever remotely matters in matches like these, so here’s how it ends: Finlay feeds Knobbs a trash can to help him out of a jam, but then clobbers Knobbs with a chair and counts a quick three for Bam Bam that awards him the hardcore title. This title has never mattered even for a second; caley’s guess that WCW is only booking this division because the WWF has a similar division seems less a guess and more an immutable truth with each show. To Excess taunts the Mamalukes and a beaten Disco in the back; they brawl. Billy Kidman (w/Torrie Wilson) is up next; the KISS Demon, a relic of Eric Bischoff spending Turner’s money with little compunction for being sensible, walks to the ring. We see Crowbar in the back, who thinks this whole KISS Demon thing is rad. The crowd is bored by the Demon’s control segment and chants for TOR-RIE. The Demon whiffs on a middle rope elbowdrop and Kidman lands a rebound bulldog for two. We cut away to Torrie before cutting back to the Demon drilling a DDT for two. This match is fine, honestly. The Demon front slams Kidman and goes up, but Kidman plays possum and catches the Demon, then lands a Latino Frankensteiner for three. Hmmm, I notice that Kidman hasn’t done an SSP in awhile. After the match, Crowbar runs in and attacks Kidman, then bows down to the KISS Demon, who thinks that Crowbar is too weird even for him. Sid cackles. The audio is very poor, so I can’t tell you what he whispered before cackling. The Total Package and Liz walk to the ring. TTP has traded his commemorative Sting chair for a commemorative Hulk Hogan chair. Package cuts a promo on the Hulkster. He’s bickering with Hogan about who is the best main eventer or whatever the fuck this feud is about. I don’t give a shit. TTP has a message for Hogan, and he wants to send that message via Hogan’s buddy Jimmy Hart. Hart comes out and says he’s not Package’s message boy, then calls Package a Hulk Hogan wannabe who will never sell as many tickets as Hogan or what-have-you. I still do not give a shit. Hart thinks Luger sucks so much that he’s stealing paychecks from WCW and turns to leave; Package stops Hart and asks for an opportunity to retort. Oh yeah, Hogan did one of his typical hokey atomic drops to Liz in that segment on Thunder after TTP and Liz crashed his interview, so Package racks Hart and then Pillmanizes Hart’s arm in return. The heat from all this couldn’t toast a marshmallow. Sid Vicious has his main event bout against Scott Hall to mercifully end this show. Hall rushes out here since there are four minutes left in the show. They rush through some cursory work so we can get to the finish, which is Sid landing a chokeslam almost right after the match starts. Sid goes for a powerbomb, but Hall goes to the eyes and then hits a fallaway slam that launches Sid into the ref for a ref bump. Hall waves for help, and Jarrett comes to ringside. The nWo members double up on Sid. Jarrett leaves as Hall lifts Sid for a Razor’s Edge and hits it, but then Jarrett re-thinks things as Hall covers. Jarrett backs Hall off the cover, and when Hall gets in his face, Jarrett KABONGS him, then puts Sid on top of hall for three. Jarrett tells Scott Steiner and the Harris Boys to pick a side when they confront him in the aisle, but Kevin Nash will be back on the next Nitro according to the auto-play thumbnail that popped up just now, so I’m not going to get my hopes up that the nWo is soon done for the last time – in WCW, at least. This show was boring and bad, but Terry Funk and Arn Anderson did their damndest to entertain me, and for that, I will reward this Nitro. I mean, at least relatively speaking. -5 out of 5 Stinger Splashes. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twiztor Posted September 23 Share Posted September 23 5 hours ago, SirSmUgly said: Show #226 – 7 February 2000 To Excess Oklahoma marches out to make a proclamation or twenty about women’s wrestling in WCW. Did WCW ever bring back their Women’s Championship? Hall responds with, “Yeah, because they’ve owed me since my World War 3 victory in ’97.” HOLY SHIT, that is incredible! you're killing me. Lane + Idol = 2XS sadly (?), no. WCW only ever acknowledged one champion. Akira Hokuto won it at the end of '96, vacated it in '97, and it disappeared forever. I think they did some Japan-only thing with it later, along with introducing a Women's Cruiserweight Title. hell of a callback, but Hall DID get his shot. Uncensored '98, vs. Sting. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirSmUgly Posted September 23 Author Share Posted September 23 14 hours ago, twiztor said: you're killing me. Lane + Idol = 2XS Hold up. HOLD UP This team is a takeoff on Too Much that Lenny and Lodi called To Excess (as in, Lodi said, "we do everything to excess" as the way to name this team). And you sit here and say I'M killing YOU for not spelling it 2-X-S? twiztor, you are one of my favorite posters on these here interwebs, you know that, and I say only with affection that you'd better get the fuck outta here with that. Their name will NOT be written as 2XS in these reports. They are To Excess. They are FOREVER To Excess. And they're Lenny and Lodi, not Lane and Idol. If they ever stop being bad, they can be Lane and Idol. Until then, they're Virgil/Crush status. You'd just better count yourself lucky that I'm not going to steal Gorman's "6yxx" gimmick and spell "To Excess" in a different way each review except for the way that WCW apparently spells it. Two Xcesz. Tu Eccess. Too XESS. Don't tempt me, though. Quote sadly (?), no. WCW only ever acknowledged one champion. Akira Hokuto won it at the end of '96, vacated it in '97, and it disappeared forever. I think they did some Japan-only thing with it later, along with introducing a Women's Cruiserweight Title. They should have kept Mona as the centerpiece of a new women's division and backfilled it with a bunch of good workers through their NJPW connection. Get Toshie Uematsu back over here and on television instead of this Madusa nonsense. Quote hell of a callback, but Hall DID get his shot. Uncensored '98, vs. Sting. He did, but it's just too good that he's still complaining about not getting an immediate shot after winning WW3 over two years later. The PPV doesn't even exist anymore. It killed me. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stefanie Sparkleface Posted September 23 Share Posted September 23 4 hours ago, SirSmUgly said: They should have kept Mona as the centerpiece of a new women's division and backfilled it with a bunch of good workers through their NJPW connection. Get Toshie Uematsu back over here and on television instead of this Madusa nonsense. I've now headcanoned a more in-depth WCW/GAEA partnership, and now I'm mad in retrospect that we didn't get a segment with Sakura Hirota treating La Parka like she did Aiger. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BobbyWhioux Posted September 23 Share Posted September 23 On 9/22/2024 at 3:19 PM, SirSmUgly said: Backstage, J. Biggs – in a full back brace after being attacked by Booker last week – has some cops confiscate Booker’s gear because this feud is so dumb. I’m just plopping it on the Worst Feuds list right now. Wait, no, I just checked, and I already added it. I’m tempted to add it twice. Two entries, in observance of how depressingly out of shape Ahmed "Big T" Johnson got in just two years. I'll take it. On 9/22/2024 at 10:37 AM, SirSmUgly said: Gene Okerlund interviews Sid Vicious in the back; Sid is chill about the nWo and complains that everyone treats them OOOOOOH *waggles fingers* LIKE A SIX-HEADED MONSTER. He doesn’t seem very worried about either Hall or Jarrett, though. I reiterate my point from the Memoriam thread about Sid being an underrated promo. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirSmUgly Posted September 24 Author Share Posted September 24 Thunder Interlude – show number ninety-eight – 9 February 2000 "The WCW Gang is at times almost indistinguishable from aughts TNA" It’s on to another Thunder that is devoid of both a lot of big stars and a lot of the midcard that looked like they’d be big stars someday…I think WCW could have weathered the loss of the Radicalz okay if they weren’t missing Goldberg, Rey, Sting, and the Hitman all at the same time… Recap: Terry Funk and Arn Anderson were the saving grace of a bad Nitro…Ah, I’ll give Sid some love too…All he does is keep being a popular, easy-to-root for babyface…And while I’m a Jeff Jarrett fan, he’s just not a legit main eventer right now even with a bunch of guys out and space made for him to seize that spot… Jeff Jarrett and the Harris Boys arrive at the arena separately from Scott Hall… The Cruiserweight Championship tournament rolls on…Mike Tenay and Bobby Heenan discuss it briefly, and by that, I mean Heenan completely ignores the brackets and talks about Scott Hall instead…We’ve had years of teased nWo splits, so Tenay and Heenan trying to sell another nWo split at this point is not exactly engaging me with the show's main storyline… This Cruiserweight Championship tournament is relegated to Thunder until the finals at SuperBrawl, just in case you were wondering how important the belt is…Shane Moore faces Lash LeRoux in the first of two semifinal matches left in this tourney…Lash poses against the guardrail like the discount Cajun Jericho that he is…Three Count holds him in place for a Moore springboard moonsault…Moore gets two off that right after the bell rings, then gets two more on a dancing legdrop…He gets out of a jam with a sunset flip that gets two more…Lash finally blocks a Moore wheelbarrow by buckle bonking the erstwhile Three Count member before taking over… LeRoux lands a Whiplash…Karagias distracts the ref while Helms hops in the ring and superkicks Lash…Lash survives a two-on-one attack from Helms and Moore, hits a double Bourbon Street Blues, knocks Karagias off the apron, and leaps over a charging Moore before rolling him up for three…Three Count attacks Lash after the bell, but Norman Smiley chases them off and reiterates his plan to fight all of Three Count at SuperBrawl…He calls Helms “Sugar,” the first time on television that nickname has been uttered for the future co-savior (at the death) of this poor old division. Matches for tonight’s show: Bam Bam Bigelow vs. The KISS Demon…Booker T. vs. Stevie Ray…To Excess faces the Mamalukes…This show sounds wretched… You know, we’re only a little over thirteen months away from WCW being sold to Vince McMahon, and it strikes me that there are still like three more showrunner eras to get through before that happens…When I was a teenager, my brain was still developing and everything felt longer and drawn out…I’m realizing as an adult in middle age that all this shit happened incredibly quickly within WCW… Jeff Jarrett (w/Harris Boys) comes to the ring…Jarrett is just not good in this role…He’s simply not believable…Especially on nights when he’s standing next to the Messrs. Scott…He yammers on and on about his plans to become WCW World Heavyweight Champ…He books the Harris Boys against Sid and Terry Funk for later tonight…Before he can leave to the dulcet tones of “Rockhouse,” the Wolfpac theme hits…Scott Hall wrote his catchphrase down so he’d remember it this time…Hall thinks he's got the stroke, not Jarrett…Well, since he's about to get fired from WCW, I'm not sure he's quite correct!...Hall talks about their history in the WWF, blah blah, this is a zero of a mic battle…Hall reminds Jarrett that he’s only the acting commissioner, and that title is about expired because Kevin Nash is back on the job… Nash and some scantily-clad nurses pop up on the TurnerTron…Nash tries to be funny, but I’m over him being on my television, so I do not chuckle…He does relieve Jarrett of his “acting” label… Jeff Jarrett “Slapnuts” Count: 2, and an extra one from Kevin Nash to Jarrett besides…Nash quotes Ben Parker while rambling on about how he’s going to punish Jarrett…Rather than covering Jarrett in barbecue sauce and tossing him in a padded cell with Meng or sticking him on an island with Larry Z. to live through Larry’s territory days stories, Nash decides to make a match…Scott Hall vs. Jeff Jarrett later tonight for the title shot at SuperBrawl…Hall takes a survey in which he asks whether the crowd is here for the Outsiders or Jeff Jarrett…I think you know who wins this survey… After a break, Jarrett and the Harrises throw a tantrum backstage… Bam Bam Bigelow has a plundah-fest with the KISS Demon…Or not, actually…The Demon steps out of his casket, poses with his head down, and is immediately laid out by a single kendo stick shot that gets three…I love that WCW signed this licensing deal and then just jobbed out the guy after paying all that money…Knobbs tries to attack Bam Bam after the match, but he fails miserably… Okerlund interviews Sid and Terry Funk in the back…I think Sid and Funk tagging on a random Thunder constitutes a WCW-ass WCW matchup, even if it’s against the completely shitty Harrises…Sid bigs up Funk…Funk threatens Ric Flair…He's got someone at this show who has beef with Flair, he says... J. Biggs says that Booker is still in jail, so Stevie has nothing to worry about tonight…Big T. immediately decides that he’s gonna go eat since he won’t need to watch Stevie’s back…I mean, is there a point to making the obvious quip?...Big T.’s out here putting them on tees for me… Stevie Ray (w/J. Biggs) comes to the ring after the break…Is it weird that Kanyon just fucking disappeared from television and Biggs glommed on to Stevie?...I think it’s weird…Kanyon is a very useful midcard talent right now, so if he’s not hurt or shooting another movie, then I don’t get why he's off television…Anyway, Stevie and Booker are going to wrestle over the letter “T” at SuperBrawl because Kevin Sullivan and Terry Taylor are hopeless idiots…Booker storms to the ring when his nonsensical music hits…Midnight tries to stop him, so he angrily points her to the back…Booker gets a mic and says that he’ll settle things with Stevie later because he has words and also probably ass whoopings for J. Biggs…Stevie tries to stop Booker, but gets his ass kicked…Booker manhandles Biggs, grabs a chair, and pops Stevie with it as Stevie lumbers up from behind…Booker storms away after all that…Good to see this company continue to utilize the over midcarders it still possesses in such an effective way!... Hall and Nash chat about executive matters over the phone…Nash claims that Jarrett spent fifty-seven grand on guitars and they riff in an unfunny manner before Nash asks about the whole Knobbs/TTP deal from a couple of Nitros ago…Nash says “let’s have some fun tonight,” and Hall makes me laugh for the first time all show by quipping, “That’d be different”…It’s funny ‘cuz it’s true!...Nash books Finlay against TTP for the fuck of it…They move on to a discussion about Hulk Hogan being back in the company before we finally cut away… Ric Flair rants at Gene Okerlund backstage…Ric doesn’t think much of Hulk Hogan…Okerlund tries to refocus Ric on Terry Funk…Funk said something about bringing someone to this show who has problems with Ric, remember…Let me guess, is it Dopey Dave?...Ric cuts a crazed promo in which he WOOs a lot…The crowd wants to cheer for him, but dammit, he’s going to try to be a heel!...You know, YAPAPI hasn’t happened yet, either…And Hogan’s in the red-and-yellow when he serves up THE STRAPATION, DUDES…So I guess that mention of Hogan from Ric is probably leading us there, especially considering how little time Hogan has left in this company…Then again, WCW is almost dead, so almost everyone has very little time left in the company... Billy Kidman (w/Torrie Wilson) and Crowbar (w/Daffney) fight because, uh, Crowbar stans the sorry-ass KISS Demon…WCW, everybody!...This match is acceptable…The fight goes outside almost immediately…Crowbar hits a Vader Bomb off the railing and onto a prone Kidman on the mats…Well, that was a cool spot for this nothing television match…Back in the ring, Kidman dropkicks Crowbar on a diving double-axe attempt…A Kidman rebound bulldog gets two…We get a shot of Torrie that causes us to miss Crowbar somehow grabbing Kidman and sticking him with a DDT…This is a taped show!...Do better at editing this nonsense!...Kidman gets two on a Sky High…He tries an Irish Whip, but gets reversed and caught and dumped on a leapover… Crowbar lands a slingshot legdrop for two…A Northern Lights with a bridge doesn’t even get a count because Torrie is talking to the ref on the apron…Crowbar goes for the pipe, but Kidman wrenches it away, pops Crowbar in the ankle with it as Crowbar stands on the top rope, and follows with a Latino Frankensteiner for three…I just miss Rey Misterio Jr., honestly, is all that finish makes me realize…Crowbar bashes himself into the ring stairs in penance for losing…Cmon, Crowbar, if you want to be world champ someday, you should do hundreds of hindu squats every time you fuck up instead…That’s what really builds character… WCW television matches are longer than they were when Russo was around, but not that much longer…Again, there’s a sweet spot for television matches that WCW TV matches often meandered past, but now WCW is rushing these matches even though they’re a minute or three longer than they were… Sid Vicious and Terry Funk hook it up with the Harris Boys (w/Jeff Jarrett)…Sid and Funk’s recent doings on Nitro get recapped during the entrances…I have to say that Crush and Horace Hogan coming to the ring to “Rockhouse” is actually a better use of “Rockhouse” than having the Harris Boys come to the ring while it plays…Jarrett gets on commentary and claims to be the real commissioner…These Harrises are a black hole…Just awful…Safe workers, at least, but awful…Sid is undeniably over, though…Funk ends up piledriving one Harris Boy on concrete…He gets a table and sets it up while the other Harris tangles with Sid on the other side of the ring…Funk goes up to moonsault onto Ra/oD and Jarrett gets up and pops him with his guitar…Sid chases Jarrett to the back…Da/oR pins Funk for three…Then he pulls up his pants and looks like a dork while doing it… Ric Flair yells a stream of nuttiness at a theoretically off-camera The Total Package…He wants to help TTP take Hulk Hogan out on Nitro, but in exchange would appreciate it if Package could break Funk’s arm…I don’t give a shit… SuperBrawl X looks like it will follow Souled Out 2000 in challenging BatB ’99 for the title of “Worst WCW PPV,” or at the very least “Worst Nitro-Era WCW PPV” if you disagree with me that GAB ’91 is better than BatB ’99… The Total Package and Liz come to the ring as Tenay questions whether or not Flair was actually rambling at an oddly silent TTP…Package uses the word “unison” incorrectly…I think he meant “union,” as in he and Flair are forming one against Hogan…He does claim that Flair is his protégé, which is pretty funny…After Package is done doing some rambling of his own, Fit Finlay jogs down to fight him…Finlay goes at Package’s left arm in a bit of karma…Liz tries to sneak up on Fit, and he snarls at her as she quickly backs away…Finlay is out here doing the Lord’s work to make this an interesting match, as short as it is…He runs the ropes and Liz tags him in the leg with a baseball bat…Package takes the bat and, though he loses the match by DQ, he gets some rage out by tagging Finlay with the bat and then Pillmanizing his arm…TTP leaves and Knobbs runs down and slams Finlay’s hurt arm against the apron, then cackles… To Excess insist on interviewing with Okerlund in the back…Lenny says NIZ-ZAME…Then he says RIZ-ZATS…I am so bummed about this team… Speaking of being bummed about shitty tag teams that I really wish weren’t on television, here come the Mamalukes (w/Disco Inferno)…To Excess jump them in the aisle…What if, instead of this shit, we simply pushed Three Count?...That would rule…I could be watching Three Count right now instead…Miss Hancock rushes her way to ringside, takes her hair out of a bun, and then slaps a piece of paper on the commentary desk before rushing off again…Commentary can’t tell what the paper says…This match is so void of heat, you’d think it was being held on Pluto…Lodi crashes into Disco while running the ropes and stumbles forward into a Paisan Plunge or whatever the fuck for three…Crowbar and Daffney hide in the aisle, then sneak down and attack Disco with the lead pipe…Daffney picks up the tag belts that Disco was holding and beats a hasty retreat while still in possession of them… Hey, it’s the Cat!...I guess that at some point, the Cat claimed that he would bring James Brown to this show with him…I think the editors at the Network cut his previous interview with Okerlund in which he claimed that he’d bring Brown with him from the last Thunder…He says Brown will definitely be there with him on Nitro…Then, he gets this Thunder into one of my good lists by making Okerlund crack…Okerlund, disbelieving Cat’s claims: “Thank goodness you don’t sell used cars”…The Cat, irritated: “I tell you what, I can sell my foot to your ass”…Okerlund: *snorts, tries to hold it in, cracks up and makes the Cat and the crowd start laughing too*…I love the Cat…That dude is legit hilarious…I cannot wait for him to be the first good commissioner this company has had in the whole Nitro Era… Ric Flair hits the ring to prattle on at Gene Okerlund…He’s angry about being disrespected by the sports media…He does make me chuckle by complaining that ESPN rated Babe Ruth and Michael Jordan over him in a ranking of athletes…Specifically, he makes me chuckle by yelling STUART SCOTT, WAKE UP…R.I.P. to one of the great non-Dan Patrick, non-Keith Olbermann Sportscenter anchors…Stu and Linda Cohn were on that second tier of SportsCenter anchors after those two, IMO…Flair has a WCW Magazine, which he tears up because it ranked Hogan over him in a list of greatest WCW wrestlers… Hey, Dustin Rhodes is still in this company!...I guess the Funker went and collected the guy, who has been off television for weeks since Jeff Jarrett beat him at Starrcade, and now he’s back on television out of nowhere…Dustin lectures Ric for ABANDONING HIS CHILD…ABANDONING HIS BOY…Dustin says that Dopey Dave is more of a man than his pops…Dustin says that he should have kicked Dusty’s ass, but since Dusty's fired and Dustin needs a neglectful father's ass to kick, he’ll kick Ric’s instead…Flair doesn’t respect dudes that weren’t main eventers, and he attacks Dustin and pretty much gets steamrolled…There’s an impromptu match, and shortly after that, there’s a ref bump…Dustin lands a bulldog and counts his own three…He goes after Flair again and gets forearmed in the balls…Dustin blocks a kneedrop, holds onto Flair’s leg, and locks on a Figure Four…Flair uses his Rolex as knucks and punches Dustin in the face with it to get out of the hold; then, he quickly covers for three… This aftermath of the segment/match is a pointless mess…Flair KOs Charles Robinson with no remorse, like Robinson didn’t used to be his trusty VP…Funk runs down and attacks Flair…TTP runs down and attacks Funk…None of this is remotely of interest to me… Nash orders Japanese food and then settles back to watch this main event… Jeff Jarrett (w/Harris Boys) faces Scott Hall for number one contendership to the WCW World Heavyweight Championship at SuperBrawl…Hall dominates early, crotch chops the Harris Boys, and goes back to beating up Jarrett…He sets up for a Razor’s Edge in a nonsensical area of the ring just so he can get backdropped to the floor…The Harrises cheat liberally to support Jarrett…I guess this moral and physical support of Jarrett is what got them jobs in TNA both on camera and in production for years…Jarrett locks on a sleeper…This spot goes on for a bit, but Hall gets out of it with a back suplex…There’s a standing ten count, but Jarrett crawls over to Hall at the count of seven and gets two on a cover…Jarrett tries to out-punch Hall and loses…He tries to run the ropes and leaps into a fallaway slam…Hall looks for another Razor’s Edge and Mickey Jay walks right up to Jarrett’s boot so he can take a ref bump…*sigh*…Why would a seasoned referee ever walk himself that close to the wrestlers during a Razor's Edge attempt?…This finish gets dumber by the second, as Jarrett jumps Hall and hits a Stroke…Slick Johnson runs down and counts a quick three…Mickey Jay gets back up and restarts the match for some reason…Jarrett gets a microphone and hits Hall with it…That only gets 2.7…He and Ra/oD try to team up on a move, but Hall ducks out of the way…Da/oR gives the U.S. title to Jarrett, but Jarrett whiffs on a belt shot…Hall gets the title and clocks Jarrett with it for one, two, and Slick Johnson pulls Mickey Jay out of the ring…Hall hits Slick with a Razor’s Edge while Sid storms down and powerbombs Jarrett…The bell rings wildly as this match ends in an apparent no contest… Welp, I think I know where Jeff Jarrett got all these insanely stupid ideas for overbooking every main event he could in TNA…Other than Ernest Miller getting Gene Okerlund to corpse among another couple of amusing moments, this show was once again a chore to watch, even if I at least derived joy from writing about the inept booking…OWWWWW… 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zendragon Posted September 24 Share Posted September 24 Remember when people said Russo to WCW was a Vince hit job? he's getting for too much blame. Its shows like these that have me wondering who thought any of this would be good and why? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirSmUgly Posted September 24 Author Share Posted September 24 8 hours ago, zendragon said: Remember when people said Russo to WCW was a Vince hit job? he's getting for too much blame. Kevin Nash must be extremely charming because he just floats on by without getting a quarter of the criticism Russo does for all of the same reasons that people criticize Russo. I had to cut off Bischoff's hyperventilating over Starrcade '99 and his admonitions about Russo's lowest common denominator television scaring off advertisers because, um, what does he think he was doing in the months before Russo even showed up letting Dennis Rodman and Randy Savage put on the type of feud that Russo would have loved (as one example). 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BobbyWhioux Posted September 24 Share Posted September 24 17 hours ago, SirSmUgly said: Welp, I think I know where Jeff Jarrett got all these insanely stupid ideas for overbooking every main event he could in TNA…Other than Ernest Miller getting Gene Okerlund to corpse among another couple of amusing moments, this show was once again a chore to watch, even if I at least derived joy from writing about the inept booking…OWWWWW… Ernest Miller was definitely a beacon in the gloam of WCW's terminal illness period. I remember Daffney, too, feeling like a highlight at the time. Mental image of her running around and screaming and randomly hitting 'ranas on people remains pretty strong. And bittersweet now like with so many others. We're still a couple months away from Lance Storm turning up, iirc? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now