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2021 HORROR MOVIES


J.T.
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Halloween Kills is like 53% at RT but most of the Rotten reviews appear to be written by assholes that do not like horror movies.

So, fuck their reviews.

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So I FINALLY get the OG Fright Night on my television screen again?! YESSSSSSS. 

The first episode of Eli Roth's History of Horror was about sequels and it was alright for its praise of Gremlins 2, Bride of Chucky (which I still haven't seen honestly, though I've seen some of Seed of Chucky) and Psycho 2 (which I haven't seen either but looks great), but they didn't talk about one that they showed exactly one scene from and would have put the show over the top: Texas Chainsaw 2. And thinking about it they could have done Phantasm 2 too. The rest was.... ehhhh. The First Purge?

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Still surprises me that AMC bothers showing cut to shreds packed with commercials movies. "You know I want to watch Halloween 4,but I want 5 minutes of ads every 10 minutes.That way the 1 hour 30 minute movie takes me 3 hours to watch."

 

I will catch the new episodes of History of Horror when they hit Shudder.

 

 

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Okay we're five deep already and this year is going well so far.

1. The McPherson Tape - Found footage alien abduction from 1989. The history behind this is kind of great. Made for 6500 dollars. The distirubtion company had a warehouse fire the originals were thought to be lost. Most people got a hold of this through tape trading, and somewhere during that people started to believe it was legitimate. Which is fucking crazy to me having seen it. I mean they actually see aliens and then go play go fish until the next scare comes. Madness.

But then the director got to remake this movie for UPN. And some people thought that was real. When UPN was like - there's a cast and crew it's not real - the original McPherson Tape collectors came up with a consiracy theory that the remake was created just to discredit the original. Even though both were made by the same driector. Anyway, it's short and it probably the closest progenitor to the found footage genre, bridging the gap from the Mondo movies to Blair Witch. So if you're into that kind of history viewing check it out.

2. Underwater - The Kristen Mcpherson flick. I really enjoyed this. It gets going, doesn't stop and the creature reveals are incredible.

3. Superhost - On Shudder. A couple of Youtube Travel Vloggers pick idyllic B&Bs to rate and review. Their host for the week is crazy. Obviously crazy. But they're so desperate for clicks that they stick it out hoping to exploit her quirky behavior. The actress who plays the nutjob is OVER THE TOP, but I loved it. The couple is rough. Not terrible acting, but just I don't know what to do with them, and they're hard to root for. To the point where I was rooting for Lady McCrazyPants. Also there's a solid cameo by a scream queen that I didn't know was in it, and she does great. Totally worth watching.

4. Jug-Face: I've put this one off because the commercials gave me a vibe that I was just going to be disappointed, and after all these years I finally gave in. I was mostly right. It's okay, but party of me felt like the premise and the tension of it are wasted.

5. DeepStar Six - Another underwater flick. The misogyny in this one for the first half is ridiculous to point of comical. The are three women(Doctors and Engineers) on the ship and almost every conversation with them is a guy being like "Oh my god just shut the fuck up." Even when the first major emergency happens it's like "Don't get your panties in a bunch, hon." Just brutal. But then all those asshole get killed so....retroactively subversive? (j/k it's still bad.) The plus side is Miguel Ferrer goes ALLLLLLLL IN with his part, and you can't really miss that.

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The UPN version of the McPherson Tape did a number on me at 9-years-old. We lived in a remote area not unlike the house in the movie, and I was seeing shit out of the corner of my eye the rest of the time we lived there. 

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1 hour ago, jaedmc said:

Tape collectors came up with a consiracy theory that the remake was created just to discredit the original.

That’s like how Orson Welles did the War of the Worlds hoax to cover up the real invasion of the Lectroids in Grover’s Mill. 

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2 hours ago, (BP) said:

The UPN version of the McPherson Tape did a number on me at 9-years-old. We lived in a remote area not unlike the house in the movie, and I was seeing shit out of the corner of my eye the rest of the time we lived there. 

I'm kinda bummed that I don't remember it at all. I even watched UPN. Well sort of. We had a weird WB/UPN hybrid channel that would play WB's primetime lineup from 7-9 and then play UPN's primetime stuff right after. 

From what I understand the UPN version aired after one of those "Real Vampires" expose show(remember when that was a thing?). So because it came after a "real" doc show, people just assumed it was also legit. 

In New Zealand they added a disclaimer saying "Viewer Advised: the Veracity of this footage is being debated in America." which was a) true and b)obviously unnecessary because it had a cast and crew and credits. ... Oh wait, who ever in charge there added the disclaimer AND purposely cut the credits from the telecast. 

 

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15 hours ago, jaedmc said:

3. Superhost - On Shudder. A couple of Youtube Travel Vloggers pick idyllic B&Bs to rate and review. Their host for the week is crazy. Obviously crazy. But they're so desperate for clicks that they stick it out hoping to exploit her quirky behavior. The actress who plays the nutjob is OVER THE TOP, but I loved it. The couple is rough. Not terrible acting, but just I don't know what to do with them, and they're hard to root for. To the point where I was rooting for Lady McCrazyPants. Also there's a solid cameo by a scream queen that I didn't know was in it, and she does great. Totally worth watching.

If you are interested a podcast I listen too has been raving about Superhost and ended up interviewing the director

 

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Hey, Control!  While it is more of a psychological thriller than it is a horror movie, I found Gaspar Noe's CLIMAX to be really awesome and totally fucking sleazy.

It is a nightmarish vision that nearly broke my brain and it is one of the few Gaspar Noe films that I actually liked.

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History of Horror's new one, Chilling Children, was a real knockout. They gave a whole section to The Brood and kind of built things to a climax with first It's Alive and then Eraserhead. Really it should have been called Chilling Parenting. Them bringing up Who Could Kill A Child? is gonna please many cultists out there. (I still haven't seen it, nor have I seen We Should Talk About Kevin which is pretty crazy.)

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6 hours ago, Curt McGirt said:

(I still haven't seen it, nor have I seen We Should Talk About Kevin which is pretty crazy.)

I am assuming you mean We Need to Talk About Kevin

I have never seen the movie or read the book but I know of it and what transpires and it is "funny" in that I never considered it a Horror movie but I totally can see how it is.

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I thought the first three VHS movies were mediocre at best. They had a decent enough concept but rarely more than one of the stories really piqued my interest. The gimmick and setting of VHS 94 came off as trying to capitalize on the growing wave of 90s nostalgia, but I enjoyed all four stories and would really love to see full length movies of the first and third offerings.

Netflix new offering There's Someone Inside Your House reminded me of a 90s/early 00s teen slasher and was watchable but not mandatory viewing.

A Classic Horror Story was kind of derivative of several other movies (I can't really get into what without spoilers) but all in all pretty good.

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Hey!  Titane appears to be playing in the RVA at the Movieland / Bowtie cinema.  I can catch an afternoon show this weekend and then grab lunch at Burgers & Brews!

I am fortunate to have a modern arthouse theater nearby.  I got to see Possessor Uncut there on limited release.  Unfortunately I missed Shin Godzilla.

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4 minutes ago, Curt McGirt said:

Hmmm, the local theater is showing Lamb. Anyone seen it yet? 

Not yet.   It's also playing at the same theater in the RVA that is showing Titane.

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