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Dolfan Watches Every Wrestlemania On Lockdown


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16 hours ago, EVA said:

I still maintain the Zombie bit was legitimately funny.

Imagine the Indy run that guy would’ve had if that segment had aired in 2019!  Would’ve had the best selling shirt on PWTees within the week.

If the guy playing the ECW Zombie hadn't died a while back, there is a 100% chance that he would've been booked against Invisible Man on a GCW show.

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17 hours ago, Dolfan in NYC said:

Plus, it's an *ECW* match, and they just do a straight wrestling match.  How do you do an *EXTREME CHAMPIONSHIP WRESTLING* tribute match that's not just a crazy brawl?  

For reasons that remain unclear, they did that match two days later on TV. Also, the New Breed actually went over. This fucking company...

 

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Burke/Pope was just having a nice midcard feud with Eddie Edwards in NWA without having even fought him yet. He's the type of guy who is a really good hand in that he can talk for anyone who needs it and can get in the ring and take an asskicking when the time calls for it.

Of course, in 2020 where managers are underutilized, he's underutilized. 

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Two rich white men have two people of color fighting for their amusement. 

Sigh...

I really should just leave the write up to this match with that one sentence, as it pretty much covers the entire premise, motivation, and execution of this match.  And you know what?  Fuck it.  This is my thread.  I'm not going to upset myself further than I already did by sitting through this piece of shit.  

End of Day 71. 

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4 minutes ago, Dolfan in NYC said:

Two rich white men have two people of color fighting for their amusement. 

Sigh...

I really should just leave the write up to this match with that one sentence, as it pretty much covers the entire premise, motivation, and execution of this match.  And you know what?  Fuck it.  This is my thread.  I'm not going to upset myself further than I already did by sitting through this piece of shit.  

End of Day 71. 

Be glad you don't also have to watch the preceding TV angles, like fake Trump with the fake Rosie O'Donnell!

Also, today I learned while Googling Elijah Burke that he was offered a spot in the Spirit Squad but was smart enough to turn it down, which lead to him stagnating in OVW for a while but probably set him up for a better career!

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2 hours ago, caley said:

Also, today I learned while Googling Elijah Burke that he was offered a spot in the Spirit Squad but was smart enough to turn it down, which lead to him stagnating in OVW for a while but probably set him up for a better career!

You say this, but we can never forget that Ziggler is a multiple time tag, US, IC, & world champion. He also went through both Spirit Squad and being Kerwin White's caddie.

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16 minutes ago, Eivion said:

You say this, but we can never forget that Ziggler is a multiple time tag, US, IC, & world champion. He also went through both Spirit Squad and being Kerwin White's caddie.

Yeah, but Ziggler never worked for Bane:

TDKR-Henchman.jpg

 

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On 8/29/2020 at 1:04 PM, Dolfan in NYC said:

MVP's entrance is one of the more underrated ones in Mania history.  He has about a dozen MVP cheerleaders come out and line the entrance way as he comes out to pyro, in a scene that I know I've seen as a gif as someone on this board's sig. My main thought was, they needed about 2 dozen more girls to line the entire entrance ramp  all the way to the ring (and form a natural barrier for him).  Benoit comes out to a very nice pop.  

 

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10 hours ago, Andy in Kansas said:

For reasons that remain unclear, they did that match two days later on TV. Also, the New Breed actually went over. This fucking company...

My initial thought was they has another match that they wanted to save the hardcore spots for but the only thing like that was Money in the Bank its extra weird

 

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DAY 72

I don't know why. but it does make me smile when women do a lumberjack match and they call it Lumberjill. Especially because even though it sounds fake, it's a real word and what you actually call a female lumber worker.  

Well, we're at the beginning of the long, terrible stretch of North American women's wrestling where looks are valued over talent. Which leads us to 2005 Divas Search winner Ashley Massaro, recently coming off her Playboy shoot. (Bill Maher's interview at the time seemed so edgy, but his 'respectable Joe Rogan' schtick is wearing thin.)  She's facing Melina, who's just won the Women's championship off Mickie James.  (I'm genuinely impressed by the fake paparazzi guys during her entrance who are basically jogging backwards about 30 yards with very expensive cameras in their hands.)   Cole tries to give the story of Melina being jealous of Ashley for having the Playboy cover, and JBL just laughs and says, that's so stupid, she's the WWE Champion, why should she care... and frankly, that makes perfect sense.

The match itself is absolutely nothing. The LJ gimmick only gets used once as Melina tried to take a breather and gets tossed right back in.  She beats Ashley quickly afterwards off a reversal of a sunset flip.  

This really should have been Mickie/Melina, but whatever. 

Ashley only lasted another year in the company and pretty much the whole industry.  She died about a year ago, which may or may not have been a suicide.   Just a very periodic reminder...

There's always someone there to talk to you, there's always a better way.  

Call 1-800-273-8255 (US), +44 (0) 8457 90 90 90 (UK), 13 11 14 (Australia).    

 

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In 2007, Shawn Michaels is approaching the final chapter of his time as an active competitor.  So, he'd adopted the mantle of making sure he had the match of the night at every WrestleMania he was at.  And much like his friend the year before, HBK was going to just check and see how good this John Cena kid was and take his title if he wasn't worthy.  His challenge for the WWE Championship would have made him a world champ for the first time in almost 5 years (and nearly 10 if you only count the WWE Champ lineage). 

As for John Cena, he's generally doing excellently as WWE Champ.  Well, unless they're 8 or women, the crowd hates his guts. He's had some fab matches with Umaga and Edge during the year.  And in January, he randomly tagged up with Shawn Michaels... and won the tag team championship in the process.  So that's a bit awkward.  Especially when HBK turns on him mid-match a few weeks later.  

So, for the last time, Shawn Michaels is in the final match of the evening.  He interestingly comes out to his D-Generation X music, which actually matches when he did so in 1997, so it's a cute bookend to that.  We cut to a sleek Ford Mustang roaming the streets of Detroit.  I often wonder, with Detroit being as... troubled... as it has been, I wonder if the center of the American auto industry pours ungodly amounts of money into keeping their streets pristine, because this definitely looks like something out of a car commercial.  Anyway, the car drifts its way into Ford Field, making odd choices on places to stop... which makes me think that's where switched from pre-taped footage to Cena driving.  And the car crashes through plate glass, and the trumpets mean it's Cena time. 

Oh boy, the crowd turned on a fucking dime when they actually saw him. lol

So, it's been a while and I honestly did not remember how this match went other than Cena winning. So, the match begins with HBK offering Cena a handshake, but Cena impolitely declining. So Shawn smacks him and gives him a "you should have shook my hand" look.  He takes over on offense, and I've seen enough Mania main events to know that the (nominal) heel usually controls the first third or so of the match, the babyface makes a comeback in the second part, and then they go back and forth to the finish.  What really struck me about the match, aside from it being great,  were a few things.  

First, Michaels controls the match, start to finish.  He's dominant and is out-wrestling Cena at every opportunity. Cena has no answers for a lot of HBK's stuff (though that will come into play later.) Cena's comebacks are strong, but shockingly limited.  John never gets more than a minute or so of offense in before HBK takes back over (or they're both down) for the entire 20 minute length.

Second, Cena is, of course, well aware of the crowd's reactions to him at this point.  So, he takes their feedback and wrestles heel for this match. He blows up Shawn's offense at key points and does not play to the crowd.  He's in business mode, and it is delightful to see. Frankly, the only ones who think he's a face are the announcers. 

Last... well, this plays into the ending. Shawn's trying everything he can think of to end this match.  After a ref bump, Shawn does a piledriver on the steel steps(!) on Cena and drags his lifeless body back in for 2. This begins a series of finisher and finisher reversals.  See, Cena may not have been able to out-wrestle Shawn, but he damned sure can out-bomb him. And the thing is, Shawn had Cena beat at a couple of points, but couldn't drag himself over to pin him in time, because he'd just been FU'ed or put into the STFU. Cena is trying to end it himself, and goes up for a Super F U, but Shawn knocks him down.  Shawn then gets too cute by half, and tries a flying body press that Cena just out-muscles him on and rolls through to another FU.  Shawn kicks out but he's in serious trouble at this point. 

Shawn's lack of  a second finisher becomes a glaring weakness as it's clear Cena knows how to deal with the Sweet Chin Music and Shawn doesn't have any other guns to shoot. The finish comes as Cena goes for a final FU, Shawn counters and goes for one last SWC, Cena counters THAT into an STFU in the middle of the ring.   And there's no escape this time.  Michaels taps and Cena retains the WWE Championship.  

Oh Kevin Dunn sticks his nose in here and is looking for positive crowd reactions, because the music is blaring so loud, they are all drowned out. But whenever he actually finds someone cheering, it's belied by the fact that you can see a ton of people headed towards the exits. This happens in about 3 straight cuts, so they just go back to Cena in the ring.  

Oh, and NOW he wants to shake Shawn's hand.  Shawn tells him to go fuck himself and leaves.  (He'd officially turn on Cena for good the following night on Raw as they'd lose the tag team straps.) 

---

So, WrestleMania 23 is in the books.   The two title matches delivered in spades.  The rest... not so much.  My own personal feelings aside, the Battle of the Billionaires was supposed to make two new stars in Umaga and Bobby Lashley and only ended up getting over Stone Cold, Vince, Shane, and Donald Trump (in that order).  The women's division is gone from the heights it had a few years back.  Even the MitB was kind of, eh.   Thank goodness Batista, Taker, Shawn, and Cena were there though.  

Alright, that's enough of that.  Let's go to the most magical place on earth... Orlando, Florida?  

End of Day 72. 

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Wrestlemania 23 is the last one I have as a DVD. I remember HBK coming out to the DX-theme, and thought it made him seem like more of a main eventer and also thought,  "well, we know he means business now, if he's using his heel theme! "

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I haven't seen either since they happened, but isn't their (Cena/HBK) rematch generally regarded as being the better of the two? I think it went something like, 45+ mins with no (maybe one) commercial break.

Also, what was the original plan for the main event? Because wasn't this the yeat Triple H tore his quad again. 

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On 8/30/2020 at 4:23 PM, Andy in Kansas said:

For reasons that remain unclear, they did that match two days later on TV. Also, the New Breed actually went over. This fucking company...

 

I believe its because they didn't get enough time. I was enjoying the New Breed I was a fan of each of them except Thorn. 

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On 8/30/2020 at 3:47 AM, Dolfan in NYC said:

  How do you do an *EXTREME CHAMPIONSHIP WRESTLING* tribute match that's not just a crazy brawl?  

Possibly, POSSIBLY they were under the impression that by having the host of Celebrity Apprentice on the show, that meant that there would be a whole ton of fresh eyeballs on the show, and they stepped away from having any hardcore violent action on there in the hope of not running the new viewers off.

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2 hours ago, PetrolCB said:

I haven't seen either since they happened, but isn't their (Cena/HBK) rematch generally regarded as being the better of the two? I think it went something like, 45+ mins with no (maybe one) commercial break.

Also, what was the original plan for the main event? Because wasn't this the yeat Triple H tore his quad again. 

the original plan was Cena/HHH II before HHH's injury. 

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1 hour ago, DreamBroken said:

the original plan was Cena/HHH II before HHH's injury. 

Ewww

I just wish we got Cena v Taker at a time that mattered. Crazy that Vince never put that together when the Streak and Cena were both molten hot.

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Day 73

WRESTLEMANIA XXIV 

So it's 2008.  Top guys are now Randy Orton, HHH, John Cena, Undertaker, and Edge. The latter with help from Vickie Guerrero, Eddie's widow, who is now in charge at Smackdown, relegating popular Teddy Long to Assistant GM status. WIlliam Regal is ruling the roost on Raw. Also, the ECW experiment isn't really working out, especially after... well... yeah.  The WWE is very, very desperate to put on a good show to hopefully make everyone forget about what happened last June.  

They've brought in some interesting star power in Floyd "Money" Mayweather and are hoping to get some positive vibes going here.  

Well, we are in the Citrus Bowl in Orlando.  I'm pretty sure it's right around now that FCW is becoming the new unofficial/official training grounds, and if not, I'm going to guess the thought definitely popped into Vince or Hunter's head that would eventually become the PC and NXT.  

And it doesn't need any more hype, but god damn, did the WWE set designers do an *excellent* job this year.  

Alright, let's get to the action.  

We actually get a video set up for the first match that focuses on (spoiler alert!) future Raw GM, Hornswoggle.  Hornswoggle, is the mini that does a leprechaun gimmick, and is generally a pain in the ass whenever Finlay is around.  He's actually a decent little worker, taking a ton of bumps and doing generally whatever they ask.  

Now, they'd been doing a "Who is Mr. McMahon's illegitimate child?" angle, which if memory serves was supposed to be Mr. Kennedy as part of his final push up the card, but he got injured (again), so they turned to Hornswoggle, because fuck it, why not.  Eventually JBL beats the fuck out of Hornswoggle, because even though the little guy claimed to be Vince's son, JBL said he had proof that he was Finlay's.  

This is a Belfast Brawl, and Lillian Garcia instantly gets on my nerves by announcing Finlay as being from Belfast, Ireland.  I mean, the Irish re-unification is high on my list of things I'd like to see in my life, but. . . oh there's Hornswoggle to get his big Mania entrance too.  Cute.  

Now this is essentially a garbage brawl between two of the toughest guys on the roster, and I mean that in a good way.  JBL is nothing if not proficient with weaponry at ringside. Finlay's obviously no slouch in that department either.  They're definitely wailing on each other but doing so with the weapons that just sound really loud, but are about as thick as a couple of sheets of aluminum foil.  So, good for them for not wanting concussions this late in their career.  

Also, a spot that actually made me bust out laughing.  Hornswoggle is at ringside looking worried as Finlay is getting beaten up on.  JBL takes a moment out of that to just chuck a garbage can full force at Horny.  Delightful. 

JBL eventually gets a kendo stick to Finlay's knee and that's enough to get him to drop his guard.  Clothesline from Hell and Finlay's out.    

Good little brawl and a good start to the ride. 

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1 hour ago, Dolfan in NYC said:

And it doesn't need any more hype, but god damn, did the WWE set designers do an *excellent* job this year.  

Because of this, the thought came into my head, "Does Vince ever watch back his shows to think about what to do going forward?"

He probably doesn't now, but maybe he used to? Anybody hear anything like that?

EDIT: Also, I hope Layfield asked Finlay which knee to swing at beforehand...

Edited by Curt McGirt
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12 hours ago, PetrolCB said:

I haven't seen either since they happened, but isn't their (Cena/HBK) rematch generally regarded as being the better of the two? I think it went something like, 45+ mins with no (maybe one) commercial break.

The rematch is the more well regarded match though I haven't seen either in so damn long. I kind of want to rewatch both back to back now because while I enjoyed the Wrestlemania match I have very little memory of it outside of piledriver. Meanwhile Dolfan's description here makes it sound almost opposite the rematch which I recall Cena controlling a large portion of. Sounds like it actually played off of the Wrestlemania match a bit.

Edited by Eivion
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On 9/3/2020 at 10:40 PM, Curt McGirt said:

Because of this, the thought came into my head, "Does Vince ever watch back his shows to think about what to do going forward?"

He probably doesn't now, but maybe he used to? Anybody hear anything like that?

EDIT: Also, I hope Layfield asked Finlay which knee to swing at beforehand...

Apparently he used to book long term WM to WM, which is insane to think about considering all the last minute rewrites we have currently

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