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Most Ridiculous Horseshit on TV

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I nominate the Travel Channel, (which for years has had nothing to do with travel). My wife and younger sister-in-law are currently watching some nonsense about looking for bigfoot, which consists of some very poor actors rolling their eyes and trying to look scared. Look asshole, you are surrounded by a camera crew and production staff, there is no way in hell that even if there were a bigfoot it would come anywhere near your sideshow. 

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Does TLC still stand for "The Learning Channel?"

Because if it does, there's your winner.

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4 minutes ago, Gonzo said:

Does TLC still stand for "The Learning Channel?"

Because if it does, there's your winner.

Yeah, that's up there as is "The History Channel", which we refer to as "The Torture Channel", as they seem obsessed with the theme as pertains to ancient Rome. I swear that they did like a two-hour special on what mixes of flammable substances were used to burn people to death re-enacting the death of Hercules. Talk about some ghoulish shit, what are these people doing, bath salts?

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It's TLC. Giant and deformed humans and Dr. Pimple Popper and Untold Stories of the ER. Because people like my parents just HAVE to watch some shit where there is a person with a meathook embedded in their skull or a giant tumor that has to be removed. Fuck, I'd rather watch a cannibal flick, you might as well call that The Mondo Channel. 

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Posted (edited)
On 1/1/2020 at 6:04 PM, Curt McGirt said:

It's TLC. Giant and deformed humans and Dr. Pimple Popper and Untold Stories of the ER. Because people like my parents just HAVE to watch some shit where there is a person with a meathook embedded in their skull or a giant tumor that has to be removed. Fuck, I'd rather watch a cannibal flick, you might as well call that The Mondo Channel. 

I love both of those shows. The new season of Dr. Pimple Popper premiers tomorrow.

The worst thing I can recall from Untold Stories of the ER was when a girl was doing tricks on a bike when she fell on the bike rack with the top part of the rack piercing through her neck. This bike rack didn't have rounded ends like you usually see.

Edited by Nice Guy Eddie
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7 hours ago, Gonzo said:

Does TLC still stand for "The Learning Channel?"

Because if it does, there's your winner.

History Channel has to give them a run for their money when it comes to channels and names that don’t match the content 90% of the time.

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17 hours ago, OSJ said:

I nominate the Travel Channel, (which for years has had nothing to do with travel).

Oh, you bite your tongue!  There is absolutely nothing wrong with The Cryptozoology Channel.  It is one of my favorite things..

My vote goes to TruTV which should probably be renamed to the Men Like Stupid Things Channel.

 

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It is amusing that the network that was originally Court TV is now a "comedy based reality show" network

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6 minutes ago, RIPPA said:

It is amusing that the network that was originally Court TV is now a "comedy based reality show" network

Yeah.  It started off as The Menendez Brothers Channel and then turned into OJ TV.

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5 minutes ago, J.T. said:

Yeah.  It started off as The Menendez Brothers Channel and then turned into OJ TV.

Well as per usual - Humans are the real monsters

Impractical Jokers did huge numbers when it first hit and that is what prompted them to completely flip. And has been the lamented throughout cable - "reality" TV is far cheaper to produce than actual TV shows.

Just like how when Tim Tebow was mentioned 24/7 by ESPN and they were like "They are our highest segments/read stories by far. When you fuckers stop, we will move on"

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CourtTV relaunched last year as a streaming service (maybe a digital subchannel too?) with the original court direction.

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11 hours ago, Casey said:

History Channel has to give them a run for their money when it comes to channels and names that don’t match the content 90% of the time.

 

10 hours ago, Niners Fan in CT said:

Nothing beats  "Music Television"  uh where? 

A & E still stands for Arts & Entertainment. 

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Bravo began as a Broadway/Opera channel.

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AMC was nothing but movies from the 50s when it started.  Now it's the occasional Better Call Saul oasis in a desert of The Walking Dead.

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So with all this talk, what's caused the downfall/dumbing down of TLC, History, National Geographic et al over the years away from the things they used to be? Desperation for viewers? 

I miss the days I could switch on the History Channel and watch a random documentary about Napoleon rather than, y'know, an Ancient Aliens marathon.

*Disclaimer: I do still watch Mountain Men. Tom Oar is a personal hero

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15 minutes ago, Bustronaut said:

Bravo began as a Broadway/Opera channel.

God - I would watch the hell out of that channel if I had it now

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It's a sad commentary when you think about how highbrow these stations started out and what they had to dumb down to in order to maintain viewers. The wife and I would be delighted to watch the occasional opera instead of "Bigfoot Lives Under My Bed" or whatever happy horseshit they are showing. I'll admit that I find the cryptozoology stuff hilarious. Oh yes, there's a sixty-foot shark living in the ocean 300,000,000 years after it went extinct because of reasons. I might actually buy the idea of Wooly Mammoths in Siberia as that makes a certain amount of sense. But Megdalon? I rather think not.

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1 hour ago, Bustronaut said:

CourtTV relaunched last year as a streaming service (maybe a digital subchannel too?) with the original court direction.

It's on the Pluto TV app, too. Found it on our Vizio Smart TV while I was flipping through the channel guide a couple of weeks ago.

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I'd buy the possibility of Bigfoot living in a remote stretch of the Rockies over either. Not that I do, mind you, I find it all laughable bullshit, but if I had to place a chip on a roulette wheel of possibilities, including the above and  aliens visiting us, I think Big foot would be most likely.  A professor at ISU actually does Bigfoot talks from time to time, sigh.  As for operas and the like, your best bet is Great Performances on PBS. They have all sorts of good shit on that program, though I rarely watch.

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When I still had AHC(American Heroes Channel) I remember it started out interesting with WW2 in color and other documentaries but eventually devolved in to the “Hitler Channel” with endless documentaries about him being shown. 

I remember Destination America having a show where these hillbillies would go out in to the woods looking for some fictional creature no one had ever heard of and it always wound up with the guys unloading their weapons in the direction of some random noise in the woods or the high drama of someone tripping over a branch and spraining their ankle leaving them vulnerable to the beast, it was hilariously bad. They also use to show UFO shows from the early 90’s with nothing but super blurry footage that you’d seen a thousand times already. 

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1 hour ago, Bustronaut said:

Bravo began as a Broadway/Opera channel.

Toll Brothers Live at the MET used to come on Bravo. 

Now it comes on PBS..... the home of real culture on cable television.

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Posted (edited)
13 hours ago, RIPPA said:

God - I would watch the hell out of that channel if I had it now

On Optimum, we get Classic Arts Showcase. One day, I'm going to get lucky and flip it on to see Pavarotti singing Pagliacci.

I liked Bravo when it would air the 100 Scariest Movie Moments. I wish it had been released on dvd because I would have bought that and watch it every Halloween.

Edited by Nice Guy Eddie

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12 hours ago, Zartan said:

When I still had AHC(American Heroes Channel) I remember it started out interesting with WW2 in color and other documentaries but eventually devolved in to the “Hitler Channel” with endless documentaries about him being shown. 

I remember Destination America having a show where these hillbillies would go out in to the woods looking for some fictional creature no one had ever heard of and it always wound up with the guys unloading their weapons in the direction of some random noise in the woods or the high drama of someone tripping over a branch and spraining their ankle leaving them vulnerable to the beast, it was hilariously bad. They also use to show UFO shows from the early 90’s with nothing but super blurry footage that you’d seen a thousand times already. 

I vaguely recall the hillbillies wandering around in the woods looking for whatever the hell it was. Lots of eye-rolling and shushing IIRC; never mind the fact that you have a whole camera crew and production unit traipsing around after you making a racket...  Odd that they never caught sight of the whatsit... The AHC started out very promising until they realized that they could reuse stock footage over and over again with slightly different narration. Sort of turned into the television version of TIME-Life books would be the best analogy that I can come up with. Too bad because both Kathy & I would really enjoy a solid history channel (as opposed to the Torture Channel). 

I hadn't realized that Court TV was still going, I'm not sure if we still get it or not. I used to enjoy Judge Joe Brown scolding people and Judge Alex was always amusing. Judge Greg Mathis with his hipper-than-thou routine was entertaining for all the wrong reasons.;-) I should check and see if we still get the channel... Oh yeah, and Judge Marilyn Millian (I think is the last name) was always cool to watch. I recall this one episode where the plaintiff went on this long disjointed rant about Cuban immigrants until he finally wound down and Judge Marilyn casually pointed out that she was 2nd gen Cuban immigrant... Hilarity ensued. 

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