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SW:RISE OF SKYWALKER Discussion (All the Spoilers Here)


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First hour of it slid right the fuck out of my brain, it's almost like I was watching it during commercials of something else how little I retained.  The rest I enjoyed as fanservice and setpieces.  Wouldn't mind seeing it again as a matinee to say I've really retained it, but I'm nto in a hurry.

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10 minutes ago, Technico Support said:

What skeeves me out is that someone, at some point, fucked Palpatine.

Thought I can totally imagine an Adrian Veight situation where Palp "never gave himself to a woman" and saved up all his emissions, only to have a Death Star cleaning lady steal one.

I think it was probably something more like Anakin's conception and Palpatine used his midachlorans to "create" his child in some poor woman who then gave birth to a kid who then grew up in secrecy, found a wife / husband, and begat Rey.

The thing that bugs me is how his children somehow got past his oversight and weren't fully indoctrinated as Sith.  

Edited by J.T.
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2 minutes ago, J.T. said:

I think it was probably something more like Anakin's conception and Palpatine used his midachlorans to "create" his child in some poor woman who then gave birth to a kid who then mysteriously grew up, found a wife / husband, and begat Rey.

The thing that bugs me is how his children somehow got past his oversight and weren't fully indoctrinated as Sith.  

That's cool.  Any solution that doesn't involve Palpatine's O Face is fine with me.

You know that motherfucker screams UNLIIIIIIIIMITED POWAAAHHHHHHHHH at climax.

Edited by Technico Support
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2 minutes ago, Technico Support said:

That's cool.  Any solution that doesn't involve Palpatine's O Face is fine with me.

I just think that It's funny how the benevolent Force wielders like Luke and Obi-Wan manage to train the greatest Sith warriors while Palpatine's lineage produces one of the strongest Jedi that ever lived. 

The whole Balancers Of the Force prophecy seems to have worked out in a very ironic manner.

Edited by J.T.
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1 hour ago, Technico Support said:

That's cool.  Any solution that doesn't involve Palpatine's O Face is fine with me.

You know that motherfucker screams UNLIIIIIIIIMITED POWAAAHHHHHHHHH at climax.

I mean, dude was a Senator and Supreme Chancellor before his face got melted in the fight with Mace.  It's totally possible he begat a kid at some point before becoming Emperor.  I mean, there is a mathematical equation that it works out (I don't think anyone ever gave Rey's age), so it's possible and the kid just didn't show any force affinity (again, we're asking JJ for consistency and we're gonna find none.)

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7 minutes ago, Raziel said:

I mean, dude was a Senator and Supreme Chancellor before his face got melted in the fight with Mace.  It's totally possible he begat a kid at some point before becoming Emperor.  I mean, there is a mathematical equation that it works out (I don't think anyone ever gave Rey's age), so it's possible and the kid just didn't show any force affinity (again, we're asking JJ for consistency and we're gonna find none.)

That's what I figured. For all the people who are like, "ew gross, who would fuck him" consider that the dude was a secretly evil senator/government official. Look at our own government officials and how many of them had sex with at least one rando on the side, whether that was consensual or not. It's ridiculous to assume that a secretly evil senator obsessed with power NEVER fucked a galactic sex worker or some other woman, consensual or not, and happened to impregnate that person. It's also entirely possible there were multiple Palpatine spawn running around out there.

It's also not automatic that they would be force sensitive. That's another thing that people keep bringing up - why didn't Palpatine just ensure his son or daughter turned to the dark side. For one, I thought it was his son. Secondly, I also thought that son didn't have any powers. You can put two and two together that Palpatine didn't even give a shit about his spawn, but he still kept tabs on them and likely grew very interested when they had a daughter who was force sensitive. 

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1 hour ago, Raziel said:

I mean, dude was a Senator and Supreme Chancellor before his face got melted in the fight with Mace.  It's totally possible he begat a kid at some point before becoming Emperor.  I mean, there is a mathematical equation that it works out (I don't think anyone ever gave Rey's age), so it's possible and the kid just didn't show any force affinity (again, we're asking JJ for consistency and we're gonna find none.)

Maybe the midi-chlorians bolted from Chet Palpatine after he started speaking with a Gungan accent? 

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4 hours ago, Craig H said:

It's also not automatic that they would be force sensitive. 

Everyone is Force sensitive to a certain degree whether it be minor twinges of intuition to outright telepathy. 

People with a high enough midichlorean count can become Force wielders.  It's training and indoctrination that makes you a Jedi or a Sith.

Edited by J.T.
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Just now, J.T. said:

midichlorean count

Stop with this. The mere introduction of midichloreans was one of the worst things to even happen to this franchise and it was essentially retconned out with the new movies.

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4 minutes ago, Craig H said:

Stop with this. The mere introduction of midichloreans was one of the worst things to even happen to this franchise and it was essentially retconned out with the new movies.

Uh, I can't stop since sadly it is the measure of what makes a Force wielder a Force wielder from Lucas himself.

It wasn't my choice to demystify the Force.  it was his.

It wasn't retconned.  It was just never mentioned aloud.  Plugging your fingers in your ears and singing the La La La song doesn't make it go away.

Salad bar canon leads to straw man arguments, so take the bad with the good and keep things uniform.

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The prequels made it clear that the Jedi are supposed to be a chaste order, banned from marrying or having children (or even romantic relationships). But Luke was totally cool with training Leia to be a Jedi, then her marrying Han and having a child.

I mean, he wasn't a Jedi purist or anything. But arguably when you look at Ben Solo's life, he did more harm than good overall. Maybe the Galaxy would have been a better place had he never been born. Maybe the Jedi teachings had a bit of a point.

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17 minutes ago, AxB said:

The prequels made it clear that the Jedi are supposed to be a chaste order, banned from marrying or having children (or even romantic relationships). But Luke was totally cool with training Leia to be a Jedi, then her marrying Han and having a child.

I mean, he wasn't a Jedi purist or anything. But arguably when you look at Ben Solo's life, he did more harm than good overall. Maybe the Galaxy would have been a better place had he never been born. Maybe the Jedi teachings had a bit of a point.

ACKCHYUALLY!....

 

Part of the reason that Anakin was able to be turned by Palpatine was because the Jedi's "no significant others" rule is what kept him from sharing his visions with Obi-Wan and Yoda, which lead to Palp using that to manipulate him (The Tragedy of Darth Plageus" and having the power to save Padme and all that).  Had Yoda and Obi-Wan not danced around it with Anakin, he might not've turned.  

 

There's a neat bit in the Episode III novelization where in the middle of the Yoda/Sideous fight, Yoda realizes that he already lost the fight 200 years before it happened because he kept the dogma and went conserative with how the Order delt with outside relationships and tried to make illogical beings be emotionless.  

 

One of the things I liked about TLJ was exploring that thread and that part of Yoda being cool with nuking the tree and all the texts Rey *didn't* take was so that she would start things over without the 6 thousand years of dogmatic crap that eventually destroyed the order allowed Palpatine's rise.  But, yeah.

 

*If* you accept that the Palpatine Skywalker Saga was ultimately about the Force rebalancing itself after millennia of the pendulum swinging back and forth between Jedi and Sith (depending on how much pre-Prequel Expanded Universe stuff still counts), then Ben was going to be born by will of the Force because he was ultimately needed to get to the final destruction of the Sith and the final death of the old Jedi in favor of whatever Rey does going forward. (I guarantee you I just put WAAAAY more thought that stuff than Kennedy or JJ did, so yeah.) 

Edited by Raziel
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7 hours ago, Technico Support said:

That's cool.  Any solution that doesn't involve Palpatine's O Face is fine with me.

You know that motherfucker screams UNLIIIIIIIIMITED POWAAAHHHHHHHHH at climax.

You also have to figure some lightning is involved, and that could go over really well for a lady with the right kink.  So, not really all that unbelievable.

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Just now, Contentious C said:

You also have to figure some lightning is involved, and that could go over really well for a lady with the right kink.  So, not really all that unbelievable.

Considering how bad fully Dark Side Corrupted look in SWToR and they still can get down, it's not impossible.

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15 hours ago, AxB said:

The prequels made it clear that the Jedi are supposed to be a chaste order, banned from marrying or having children (or even romantic relationships). But Luke was totally cool with training Leia to be a Jedi, then her marrying Han and having a child.

Even if he wasn't cool with it, what was he really going to do?   He had to spread the teaching so the wisdom wouldn't die with him, but he's only one person. 

There was no Jedi council there to enforce all of that dogma of the Order and Leia was not that woman to step to and be told what to do.

 

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