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10 hours ago, Craig H said:

Welp. I have COVID. Or at least my wife does. My rapid test came back negative despite feeling like shit yesterday and today. I'm almost totally sure I'm positive. I don't see how I couldn't be.

 

Hang in there, Craig and family of Craig!

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Day 1 was coughing and having to clear my throat like I was going to have a chest cold, day 2 added on my body feeling sore, but that could also be due to me getting very little sleep going into yesterday and lifting a bunch of heavy stuff in my garage. Day 3, today, is more of the same, except now I have a headache and a 100.2 temp. Oh, and chills yesterday and today, which is annoying.

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31 minutes ago, Craig H said:

Day 1 was coughing and having to clear my throat like I was going to have a chest cold, day 2 added on my body feeling sore, but that could also be due to me getting very little sleep going into yesterday and lifting a bunch of heavy stuff in my garage. Day 3, today, is more of the same, except now I have a headache and a 100.2 temp. Oh, and chills yesterday and today, which is annoying.

Jesus. Hope you and your family feel better ASAP xxx.

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I lost my dad to cancer 4 years ago 1 week before his 65th birthday. This morning I lost my mom (also 65) to Covid (oh and it was also my nephew's 20th birthday today). 

I can make peace with my dad being gone. Nothing I could do about his cancer. But to think my mom's dead because some asshole somewhere couldn't be bothered to wear a mask, wash their hands, practice social distancing or stay home unless absolutely necessary really burns me up. 

Edited by BrianS81177
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11 hours ago, BrianS81177 said:

I lost my dad to cancer 4 years ago 1 week before his 65th birthday. This morning I lost my mom (also 65) to Covid (oh and it was also my nephew's 20th birthday today). 

I can make peace with my dad being gone. Nothing I could do about his cancer. But to think my mom's dead because some asshole somewhere couldn't be bothered to wear a mask, wash their hands, practice social distancing or stay home unless absolutely necessary really burns me up. 

Oh, shit. So sorry for your loss, @BrianS81177 xxx.

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Canada to get 249,000  Pfizer vaccine doses shipped around end of Dec, around 95% effective rate with no serious side effects.  Will take months however to give everyone who will want the vaccine.

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In light of what everyone else seems to be going through, this not even a problem, just an anecdote, but I'll put it here nonetheless. At work, we are about to get a new foreman. I've established strong rapport with the current one over the past few years, but he'll take over a new position any day now. Lately, I've seen this Pat MacAfee-looking motherfucker talking to HR representitive a couple of times, so I have a feeling I'm about to become his Adam Cole OR Pete Dunne in the near future. Let's see, which one it is?

...Yeah, that's the guy alright. We'll see how this goes?

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On 12/8/2020 at 10:54 AM, The Natural said:

You're welcome, brother. I do. Losing a parent is the worst pain ever. It's my Mum's 60th Birthday today.

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I always dreaded losing my Mum, how young she was makes it harder still. My Mum was only 53. It's not right. I had depression before losing Mum and it's gone way worse since. Fighting your mind every damn day.

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29 minutes ago, The Natural said:

130587732_10157895327798862_413544244303

I always dreaded losing my Mum, how young she was makes it harder still. My Mum was only 53. It's not right. I had depression before losing Mum and it's gone way worse since. Fighting your mind every damn day.

Keep fighting, brother.  You're one of the real bright spots around these parts. 

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@Craig HHope you are doing better, brah.  My family has managed to avoid COVID and knock on wood we'll avoid it and get vaccinated to make sure we don't get it.

@BrianS81177I am sorry for your loss. 😞

Well, my mom, my brother, my sister, and I decided to put my father into hospice care this morning.  He has been combatting Lewy body dementia for a while now and it is gradually wearing him down.  His short term memory is shot as well as his higher motor functions.   He has stopped trying to walk on his own and will barely feed himself unless a health care professional helps him.

He's frail but he's not on death's door, however he definitely needs more supervision that the other patients at his assisted living facility, hence the hospice care.   Thankfully, the additional care doesn't cost extra, so it won't be an additional financial burden on my mom.

As selfish as it might sound, if my dad passes away I hope it doesn't happen until well into the new year.  My mom's parents both passed away around Christmas, so she already hates this time of year with a passion.  I don't want her feelings about the winter holidays further tarnished by her husband dying around this time as Grandma and Grandpa.  There is a reason why we keep Christmas decorations to the bare minimum at Mom's house and don't really go all out to purchase and exchange gifts for each other.

Keep a homie in your thoughts and prayers.

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8 hours ago, The Natural said:

I always dreaded losing my Mum, how young she was makes it harder still. My Mum was only 53. It's not right. I had depression before losing Mum and it's gone way worse since. Fighting your mind every damn day.

Hang in there man.  

I'm learning every single holiday that first year after your Mom dies will completely suck.  I wake up and the first thing that comes to mind is traditions that we used to have, and realizing none of those will every happen again and I'm crying before I'm even out of bed.  Nothing is joyful anymore, just painful memories that I can at least smile at but still hurt deep down to think about.  

I felt like I was starting to feel "back to normal" again for a little while but this whole season has thrown me completely out of whack again.  

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9 minutes ago, CSC said:

I felt like I was starting to feel "back to normal" again for a little while but this whole season has thrown me completely out of whack again.  

I know how you feel.  My mom's parents both passed away around Christmas time and things haven't been the same since.

Like I said before, my mom doesn't really like to decorate her house anymore and we keep the gift exchanges to the bare minimum.  The enforced mandate of cheer associated with Christmas just depresses Mom even more..

Things were a little more celebratory when my daughter was a little kid but with my dad sick and my daughter about to go to college, Mom has gone back to being sullen starting around Thanksgiving and doesn't really lighten up until her birthday on New Year's Day.

I want to say that things will return to normal, but being out of whack may be the new normal.  Just honor her memory as best you can and remember the good times you had with your mom rather than the bad.  That sounds dumb and contrite, but it has helped get me through so far.

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8 minutes ago, J.T. said:

Well, my mom, my brother, my sister, and I decided to put my father into hospice care this morning.  He has been combatting Lewy body dementia for a while now and it is gradually wearing him down.  His short term memory is shot as well as his higher motor functions.   He has stopped trying to walk on his own and will barely feed himself unless a health care professional helps him.

He's frail but he's not on death's door, however he definitely needs more supervision that the other patients at his assisted living facility, hence the hospice care.   Thankfully, the additional care doesn't cost extra, so it won't be an additional financial burden on my mom.

 

Hugs to you from afar, man.  The weekend before moving my mom into a home where we were going through all of her stuff and having to throw most of it away and she was just sitting on the couch confused asking up why we were doing this because she just didn't understand was probably the worst day of my life until she died.  I know it was the right decision and she couldn't take care of herself anymore, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't look at that day with regret and think if things could have been different if we had found a different place for her to be.  

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Unfortunately on that similar topic - this past Friday was came the phone call that I have been waiting on for awhile.

My father-in-law suffers from dementia and it has been rapidly getting worse since the beginning of the year. Friday afternoon, my wife gets a call from what turns out to be the Fairfax police department asking if they know him. He was wandering a Town Center aimlessly, unable to find his car and when questioned by the police, he couldn't even tell them what year it was. They only happened to get in touch my wife because he had a piece of paper in his wallet with her name and number on it. (And God bless the random stranger who recognized the symptoms of someone with dementia and called the police for help.)

The police flat out said he isn't allowed to drive anymore so we have to take him to the DMV so he can be tested (which he has no hope of passing) and have his license taken away. (Oh and he already raged once about it as when my wife told him the police said he couldn't drive, he started shaking his fist in the air screaming THEY CAN'T TAKE THIS AWAY FROM ME!!!!.)

Since he lives alone - we now need to figure out either full time in-live care or putting him in some sort of assisted living community. (My wife brought the idea up for the first time with him at Thanksgiving and that went about as well as expected.) The few family relatives who remain - including my brother-in-law - are all basically useless with kind of a "Well that sucks - have fun dealing with that attitude"

He doesn't remember my name - just that I am married to my wife. He didn't remember my son (his grandson)'s name at Thanksgiving and pointed to the picture of a Japanese child (his other grandson) and asked "Is that you?" Fortunately, he at least listens to me as he gave me his keys with no fuss when I asked for them. This past Sunday he forgot my wife's name.

Right now we are trying to just figure out how to get through the end of the year and go from there. But yeah - I need to do a lot of research fast

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@RIPPACSC & I are here for you, man.  We can do our best to be a support group for you since we've all had similar experiences.

My mom has already done a lot of legwork, so I can always go to her if you have any general questions.  One thing I can say without a doubt is that as expensive as it may be, getting your father-in-law into assisted living or having live-in care there for him as soon as possible will be the best thing for him. 

As ready as we thought we were, my mom, my sister, and I found out quickly that we were not mentally or profesionally equipped to handle what my dad was going through.  He needed around the clock PROFESSIONAL care and I fear that will eventually be the case for your father-in-law as well.

The only advice I have right now is to mind the finances.   Assisted living is extremely expensive and if it weren't for my father's retirement, he'd probably be living at home and my mom would be at her wit's end.  Get the best care you can for your father-in-law that is within your means.   Catastrophic medical issues top the list of circumstances that cause people to file bankruptcy, so be mindful of your budget when you are making these key decisions.

Since your father-in-law is at the stage where he is very possessive of his belongings and has no clue what is going on in his head (my dad tried to have me thrown in jail for not giving him his car keys), live in care might not be a bad thing, since that will still allow him to be in somewhat familiar surroundings.  If he is like my dad, he will become VERY combative if he thinks that you are trying to restrict his freedom. 

You know you can always catch up with me here or by msging me on Xbox Live.   I'll be able to live chat soon as I think my brother and sister are getting me a Series X compatible headset for Christmas.

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Sorry for your loss @BrianS81177and best wishes to @Craig H, @J.T., @RIPPAand others going through various issues.

The year fucking sucks and while there's times where I can find some Christmas spirit it's just been hard to this year.  At this point I just want the new year to start though when midnight hits I don't know if I'll be ecstatic or busy crying my eyes out that it's over.  I know Christmas will be really hard for my wife who was bummed since her dad passed six years ago.  Toss in her mom passing due to rehab center incompetence and now her uncle passing away two ago and it just makes it even harder.  I've been trying to help her cope with it but no matter what I know that holidays are going to be brutal for quite some time.

So for Christmas we made a rule that sad Christmas song/shows/movies will be instant channel changers and we're just going to focus on fun things that take the piss out of it all.  Even the super corny shit will be a fine distraction.  It's alsonice knowing that our nephews are going to get a Switch from us and their parents so we're looking forward to them losing their minds over that.  The poor guys keep wanting to play it when we bring it over so it will be cool to bond with them further over that.  But hopefully once the new year hits things will be a bit better (especially later that month for reasons not to be discussed here)

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Since I'm still posting on here I figured that's a spoiler enough that I haven't died from covid. Neither has my wife. At this point I can tell something is...off? It's hard to explain. I'm a night owl and not a morning person by any means, but I'm just very tired in the morning. That passes and I become more awake until a couple hours go by and I need to take a nap again. I take a nap, wake up, and then have a headache that isn't quite a migraine, but it sucks to have anyway. I want to tough this headache out because it's probably not good to take Excedrine Migraine and Ibuprofen every day. Couple hours goes by and I'm really tired again and just need to lie down. It's either go take a nap in bed or probably fall asleep at my desk. So I take a nap for an hour or so, get up, rinse, repeat.

Throughout all of this there's other weird shit. Like, yesterday and today my right elbow is sore. Yesterday it was my right elbow and my right shoulder. I haven't done any woodworking or lifting or anything in two weeks so it's not from any of that. I pretty much exclusively sleep on my back so it's not that. It's just weirdly sore without doing anything to it. In my head all I can think is that it's from covid. Other days my hips or my back or upper body have hurt. It makes me think that I turned 40 and started to just fall apart, but it can't be that. It has to be covid because it's not a normal type of body ache or pain.

Other than that this is like a weird combination of having a cold or flu or even mono. I cough like I have a cold, but I don't cough all day. I basically cough when I'm ready to produce mucous. There's no sneezing or anything like that. I never lost my sense of smell or taste, but my wife thinks she lost her sense of taste.

We're lucky in that we didn't have more severe symptoms, but this still sucks because it's just not normal. You go through life having countless numbers of colds and everyone is sensitive to those in varying ways, but this is just different. At least with a cold you know from past experience what to expect. You don't really know what to expect with covid. It makes you second guess every feeling or ache or sense you have if you're not dealing with more severe symptoms. All you can do is say this is how I'm feeling today, hopefully tomorrow is better. Then tomorrow comes, and you may not have a headache that's been lingering for 6 days, but now you have weird body aches. Oh, and you're still very tired. It's like your body is in a constant state of confusion and the main thing you can do and the thing you can do best is just sleep and sleep and sleep and do nothing and eat and sleep.

Even without having severe symptoms and not being in any danger (that we're aware of), this is still not something I want to have. It's not something you want to get. I mean, no one WANTS to get a cold, but you just get one and you deal with it and move on. It feels like there's no moving on from this.

Yesterday was my first day back at work and I probably took 3 naps throughout the day still. So stupid. I also had to lead three different conference calls. On one of them one of my business partners was like, "what are you doing here, aren't you on FTO?" And so I explained that I didn't feel like being super dramatic by putting in my out of office notice that I'm out on covid time off so I just said I'm on paid time off. Another woman on the call revealed that's why she missed a few of our weekly meetings about a month ago because her, her husband, and her kids all had it. They're all fine, but her symptoms are consistent with mine, it's been about six weeks since having it, and she's still tired every day and needs to take naps every day. She also has my mindset in that sleep is dumb and when you're sleeping you're not doing something productive. Her husband is feeling better than her, but her husband had more severe symptoms early on including getting a kidney stone and having pneumonia. That all told me to basically expect this state of being for weeks to come and to last for a long time.

None of this even covers the constant fear I have that this did damage to my heart or brain or reproductive system or nerves or whatever. I'm always worrying about dying and this gives me a weird fear that years from now I'm going to get diagnosed with some form of cancer that was caused by covid. That's not likely, but it's just this stupid fear of the unknown.

Anyway, I'm rambling, but I wanted to give you all some insight into what an average covid experience is like. It's pretty fucking lame. Missing out on Christmas or Thanksgiving or gatherings or parties or whatever is all lame, but you have to do it unless you're all living in a bubble. You need to wear a mask and know that even if you're wearing a mask, you might still get it, but you're less likely to get it if you're wearing the mask. We're all intelligent people and understand this, but some people need some extra persuasion. Feel free to use me as an example and say this dude I know got it and he got it from his wife who is a nurse - his experience was mild, but look at all of this annoying shit he goes through on a daily basis - is that what you want? 

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16 hours ago, J.T. said:

@Craig HHope you are doing better, brah.  My family has managed to avoid COVID and knock on wood we'll avoid it and get vaccinated to make sure we don't get it.

@BrianS81177I am sorry for your loss. 😞

Well, my mom, my brother, my sister, and I decided to put my father into hospice care this morning.  He has been combatting Lewy body dementia for a while now and it is gradually wearing him down.  His short term memory is shot as well as his higher motor functions.   He has stopped trying to walk on his own and will barely feed himself unless a health care professional helps him.

He's frail but he's not on death's door, however he definitely needs more supervision that the other patients at his assisted living facility, hence the hospice care.   Thankfully, the additional care doesn't cost extra, so it won't be an additional financial burden on my mom.

As selfish as it might sound, if my dad passes away I hope it doesn't happen until well into the new year.  My mom's parents both passed away around Christmas, so she already hates this time of year with a passion.  I don't want her feelings about the winter holidays further tarnished by her husband dying around this time as Grandma and Grandpa.  There is a reason why we keep Christmas decorations to the bare minimum at Mom's house and don't really go all out to purchase and exchange gifts for each other.

Keep a homie in your thoughts and prayers.

Seems like the right thing to do, stay strong, we're all there with you in one way or another.

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Dementia of any type and things that can happen when stuff does happen (my grandma's brain went to shit after a stroke she survived that put her in a home, but it wasn't dementia, just brain damage I assume) are a bitch to see. As I've probably mentioned, I saw so many people with dementia in her nursing home/whatever you want to call it who were just GONE and they never had visitors or anything. It was depressing, but I'm glad we visited her as much as we did because it kept her alive another five years until she had another stroke.

My parents were the ones that found her in the first place and I can't imagine what that did to my father to see her like that(they were going there to pick her up and spend time with her because that's what they took turns doing). My other grandmother had dementia and depression after grandpa died, but had great in-home care because they were able to afford it for her, so that was that least. Hearing about her sons setting up the damn bed in her home for hospice care is something I'll never understand. I just can't be that kind of person unless I had no choice.

Anyone dealing with family going through that has my deepest understanding.

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