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Smackdown spoilers, 4th October 2013


The Natural

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Out came Big Show, who begged for a little understanding from the crowd. After all, what kinda job options are out there for a giant? Out came Triple H, but not too close. From the ramp, he told Show not to worry about that mortgage anymore cause he paid off Show’s house, and now Hunter holds the mortgage! And, just to make tonight’s main event fair, Randy Orton will join The Shield in a handicap match against Show.Cat calls, howls, and whistles means Lilian Garcia is in the ring to announce:(1) Rob Van Dam beat Fandango via DQ due to interference from Summer Rae. Once RVD recovered, he went hardcore on Fandango. The beat down ended with RVD going coast-to-coast on Fandango in the corner covered by a garbage can.(2) Ryback (w/Paul Heyman and Curtis Axel) beat R-Truth. Apparently Ryback needed a little motivation ‘round mid-match, so Heyman told him R-Truth is a bully.Damien Sandow came out to the announce table to scout the next match...(3) World Hvt. champion Alberto Del Rio beat Dolph Ziggler.(4) Los Matadores beat 3MB.(5) Brie Bella (w/Nikki Bella) beat Aksana. Post-match, A.J. Lee (with Tamina) came out to tell Brie what’s in store for her this Sunday at Battleground. A.J. threw in some references to Brie’s pending nuptials with Bryan. A.J. seemed to think that the doctor delivering any future child of their union will slap her rather than the child because it will be a goat baby.(6) Kofi Kingston quickly beat Big E. Langston.A promo on the Titantron for WrestleMania XXX in New Orleans brought out a “Who Dat” chant. As in “Who dat say gonna beat dem’ Saints?” Apparently not the Dolphins. We hope not the Bears.(7) Main Event: Big Show beat The Shield (w/Orton) via DQ after Shield introduced a chair into the ring. A post-match beat down continued until The Usos came out, followed by Daniel Bryan to a huge pop. Faces cleared the ring to close the show.

 

Credit: pwtorch.com

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Out came Big Show, who begged for a little understanding from the crowd. After all, what kinda job options are out there for a giant? Out came Triple H, but not too close. From the ramp, he told Show not to worry about that mortgage anymore cause he paid off Show’s house, and now Hunter holds the mortgage!

 

Is it too much to ask that, at some point, evil landlord Triple H "relocates" Show's house (ie, moves it off the foundation and tows it away), and Shpw responds by throwing himself onto the roof as the semi drives away?

 

Ok, this probably wouldn't work because (A) Show's house is undoubtedly too large to move that way and Show would probably have to jump off an overpass or something to land on the roof.  But, c'mon, CALLBACKS TO THE BIG SHOW-BIG BOSSMAN FEUD ARE GOOD FOR BUSINESS!

 

("Good for business" should be their new blanket justification for whatever inane angles they want to run:

 

John Cena champion for life?  GOOD FOR BUSINESS

DX squashes 17 guys and puts them in a crate marked "Return to Florida"?  GOOD FOR BUSINESS

Brie Bella has an affair with Mark Henry and gives birth to a foot?  GOOD FOR BUSINESS)

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I would love if the next step in this is if HHH makes Big Show's family homeless. A rebellious Big Show is in the ring and then HHH and Steph show footage of Mrs. Show and his shoeless children waiting in line at a WIC office only to discover it's closed because of government shutdowns.

 

This is similar to the idea someone once had on here that the insane Ric Flair Finance sub-prime mortgage pyramid scheme (yes, that was an actual business that Natich lent his name to with the "Figure Four Loan Processing Program") was actually a ruse to screw with Sting's credit rating.

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According to some other spoiler report I read, Bray Wyatt vs Kofi Kingston and Curtis Axel vs. R-Truth for the IC Title were added to the Battleground PPV at the tapings as well. Full card:

 

Daniel Bryan vs. Randy Orton - WWE Title

Alberto del Rio vs. RVD - World Title

Curtis Axel vs. R-Truth - IC Title

Cody Rhodes/Goldust vs. The Shield - Tag Titles

Brie Bella vs. AJ Lee - Divas Title

CM Punk vs. Ryback

Bray Wyatt vs. Kofi Kingston

Dolph Ziggler vs. Damien Sandow - YOUTUBE PRESHOW

 

What was the last WWE PPV that looked so underwhelming on paper as this one?

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According to some other spoiler report I read, Bray Wyatt vs Kofi Kingston and Curtis Axel vs. R-Truth for the IC Title were added to the Battleground PPV at the tapings as well. Full card:

 

Daniel Bryan vs. Randy Orton - WWE Title

Alberto del Rio vs. RVD - World Title

Curtis Axel vs. R-Truth - IC Title

Cody Rhodes/Goldust vs. The Shield - Tag Titles

Brie Bella vs. AJ Lee - Divas Title

CM Punk vs. Ryback

Bray Wyatt vs. Kofi Kingston

Dolph Ziggler vs. Damien Sandow - YOUTUBE PRESHOW

 

What was the last WWE PPV that looked so underwhelming on paper as this one?

 

When the Divas' match is arguably in the top half of "most interesting matches on a PPV", it's not a very good PPV.

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Wait, this looks weak on paper?1) Bryan/Randy has MOTY potential.

 

2) Rhodes/Shield is going to rule.

 

3) Punk/Ryback could be really good.

 

4) I still think ADR can get a good match out of RVD, especially in a hardcore rules match. RVD's spots make more sense in some wild brawl type thing.

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I would love if the next step in this is if HHH makes Big Show's family homeless. A rebellious Big Show is in the ring and then HHH and Steph show footage of Mrs. Show and his shoeless children waiting in line at a WIC office only to discover it's closed because of government shutdowns.

 

This is similar to the idea someone once had on here that the insane Ric Flair Finance sub-prime mortgage pyramid scheme (yes, that was an actual business that Natich lent his name to with the "Figure Four Loan Processing Program") was actually a ruse to screw with Sting's credit rating.

They should show Big Show living in a box backstage at whatever arena they're at. Send him out into the crowd begging for money using a gigantic hat. Have him in the parking garage cleaning other wrestlers' car windows with newspapers. Ditch his entrance music and have him come out to "Ain't Got No Home" by Clarence "Frogman" Henry.

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I also love the thought of HHH doing all of this in his spare time. Steph already unearthed his failing strip mall investments. I'd imagine they had the same paralegal then check his mortgage records and saw some foreclosure filings. HHH approaches the bank and offers to take it off their hands. They've had this up their sleeve for a while but they needed to wait for an appraisal.

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I also love the thought of HHH doing all of this in his spare time. Steph already unearthed his failing strip mall investments. I'd imagine they had the same paralegal then check his mortgage records and saw some foreclosure filings. HHH approaches the bank and offers to take it off their hands. They've had this up their sleeve for a while but they needed to wait for an appraisal.

 

Don't forget that Stephanie is now close friends with Mrs. Big Show. They're so tight that she would tell Steph about Big Show's performance problems, if you will.  The McMahon-Levesque's are very close with their employees.

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The continuity on Big Show's dong varies. I assume Val has some sorta Toxic Avenger 4 dong, so he has no perspective. As for the rest of the show. Has RVD slowed down to the point, he needs Shane McMahon's garbage can to hit the Van Terminator?

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