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October Horrordays


Curt McGirt

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I have no idea why that poster is in black and white when all the Corman Poe films are in such vivid Technicolor. 

 

I caught this about 15 minutes in so missed most of "Morella", the first of the three stories. The end is apparently a Corman creation made of reused footage from Fall of the House of Usher (the first Corman Poe film, and one of my first VHS purchases) but it has the same effect: overly dramatic gothic horror with a nasty denouement. 

 

The second in the anthology is "The Black Cat" which is a mashup of the title tale, "The Cask of Amontillado", and "The Tell-Tale Heart" storywise. Peter Lorre is a goddamn force of nature in this one. He plays the village drunk who harasses his unreasonably attractive wife (for him, anyway -- this is a recurring theme) for booze money and ends up having a wine-tasting contest with a gloriously google-eyed, scenery-chewing Vincent Price, who takes him home and begins sleeping with the wife. Peter catches and kills them, puts them behind the wall, and gets caught by the cops because of the cat. Because of Lorre's alcoholism we get a bunch of great Corman hallucination/dream sequences where he sees Komodo dragons, snakes, tarantulas, etc. If you don't crack up watching this one numerous times you just don't have any sense of humor. 

 

"The Facts in the Case of M. Valdemar" brings the seriousness back with a dying Vincent Price being hypnotized by Basil Rathbone, keeping him in a state of suspended animation. Apparently it also gives him the ability to speak to people telepathically as well (!). Eventually Vince gets up from his slumber to choke out an intensely sleazy Rathbone and melts, not quite on the level of the end of The Terror or anything but close. 

 

Overall this is pretty up there with the great horror anthologies due to "The Black Cat" alone, being one of the earliest examples of horror comedy and probably trumping The Raven, which was even earlier. And it's Corman doing Poe so, ya know, you gotta watch it.

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I got through about half of The Seventh Sign a minute ago. Jurgen Prochnow, Michael Biehn, Demi Moore in the nude with a fake pregnancy belly and a lot of Biblical mumbo-jumbo. It was trippy enough, but nothing that Rosemary's Baby didn't already do 1000 times better years before.

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My ratings for movies are going to fall along the lines of the simple Netflix 5 star range (Hate it, Didn't Like It, Like It, Really Like It, Love It). I am not a hardcore film critic, I just want to be entertained.

 

1. Haunting At Silver Falls

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Piranesi was spot on with hit great review of this film. This had been on my radar because these two chicks look like they will split your head open and feast on your brains. Sadly this is not the case, however what is here is an enjoyable thriller with supernatural elements. The flick keeps a good dark mood throughout and has an enjoyable enough ending even if the final third was incredibly quick. Alix Elizabeth Gitter plays a cute leading lady that is likeable. Erick Avari is the perfectly cast as the town psychologist. 4/5

 

2. American Mary

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This was another movie pimped on the board by Curt. My preconceived idea of this movie based on the cover was completely off base. I expected to be grossed out by limbs flying here, there and everywhere but what we have is a well written, well acted story that follows the plot line of I Spit On Your Grave for the first half of the movie before veering off in its own direction. I have fallen in love with Katherine Isabelle, she is a captivating leading lady that is fun to watch, even if she is a bit soulless sometimes. This has some psychological elements as opposed to scares but in reality it is just a fantastic story and well worth a watch on Netflix. Titties and Shrimp!! 5/5

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The Werewolf vs. The Vampire Woman (1971)

 

Things that have never been seen by human beings! The blood flows like vintage wine!

 

First, bad dialogue and even worse acting has been seen by human beings. Multiple times.  Second, there is barely any blood in a film where a vampire and a werewolf clash in some shoddy little castle in the middle of Eastern Europe. If that is how wine flows in your neck of the woods, I'd suggest searching for a better liquor-serving establishment. Pronto.

 

Now before we continue, let me say I *love* bad horror movies. My favorite monster movie is Q, and my all-time favorite horror movie is Death Bed.  Both of them are campy and horrible and ridiculous...but they also pass into the "so bad it's good" realm of cheesy entertainment. This movie does no such thing.  It just sucks.

 

Not to be crass (scratch that: it's my review and I'll be as crass as I want), but the big problem here is nudity. How the Hell is a movie from 1971 about women being stalked by a female vampire and saved by a questionably handsome werewolf NOT simply break down into a softcore pornfest? Anyone? They have at least eight different opportunities to strip naked and save this film, and they take the "high road" every time. This is neither the time or the place for such nonsense.

 

The ending is ridiculous. The final showdown is weak, and the "big twist" at the end is lame.  The film screams nothing more than "81 minutes of my life that I'll never get back." What a horrible start to this project.  

 

GRADE: F

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The Werewolf vs. The Vampire Woman (1971)

 

Things that have never been seen by human beings! The blood flows like vintage wine!

 

First, bad dialogue and even worse acting has been seen by human beings. Multiple times.  Second, there is barely any blood in a film where a vampire and a werewolf clash in some shoddy little castle in the middle of Eastern Europe. If that is how wine flows in your neck of the woods, I'd suggest searching for a better liquor-serving establishment. Pronto.

 

Now before we continue, let me say I *love* bad horror movies. My favorite monster movie is Q, and my all-time favorite horror movie is Death Bed.  Both of them are campy and horrible and ridiculous...but they also pass into the "so bad it's good" realm of cheesy entertainment. This movie does no such thing.  It just sucks.

 

Not to be crass (scratch that: it's my review and I'll be as crass as I want), but the big problem here is nudity. How the Hell is a movie from 1971 about women being stalked by a female vampire and saved by a questionably handsome werewolf NOT simply break down into a softcore pornfest? Anyone? They have at least eight different opportunities to strip naked and save this film, and they take the "high road" every time. This is neither the time or the place for such nonsense.

 

The ending is ridiculous. The final showdown is weak, and the "big twist" at the end is lame.  The film screams nothing more than "81 minutes of my life that I'll never get back." What a horrible start to this project.  

 

GRADE: F

Marty, were you watching one of the Public Domain copies of the film?

This review describes the Anchor Bay version released under the title Werewolf Shadow that is uncut.

I have an old PD disc of this myself, as I'm a Naschy fan.

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I dug around in the stacks and found my copy of Werewolf Shadow that was one of the Best Buy double-feature Naschy re-releases. Is this the same copy as that uncut boot? If so I'll watch it and review... if not I'm throwing it back and watching Night of the Werewolf for my Naschy fix this year, or the truly awesome Vengeance of the Zombies. And while we're on the topic, if anyone has a copy of The Hunchback of the Morgue I'll throw them a couple bucks for a DVDR.

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DAY 1 of 31 [REC]3 - GENESIS

I didn't know what I was going to get here, but I really enjoyed this. It's a pretty big departure from what people expect from the series at this point and I think that's a good thing. It's not just the switch from found footage to a normal cinematic style, it's a tonal shift that if you think about it isn't totally unexpected. The horror genre is, to one extent or another, a sad disfigured cousin of dark comedy. And most director's of the genre get a certain amount of glee from scaring their audience that often translates into film. Peter Jackson and Sam Raimi come to mind, and I think this movie owes quite a bit to them, with the chainsaw bits and the creative use of a hand blender.

 

You also get a very cool female protagonist, who is very determined and not just a weeping willow waiting for her white knight to save her. She's proactive about her situation and the actress pulls off this cool balance of delicate pitbull rather well.

 

I can see why a lot of people would complain, expecting more of the same and getting something else entirely, but I love it. The directors have created this sandbox and they want to play in it, and tell different stories and different ways, and I'm excited for what comes next.

 

DAY 2 of 31 THE LORDS OF SALEM

I'm going to be a little brief here because I'm going to do a little longer write up for my blog, looking at some shot compositions and themes later today. But I can tell you this is pretty enjoyable. I'd probably put it in the area of Devil's Rejects and Halloween II. I have zero problem with Sherri Moon. I actually quite like her. I thought she was good in Halloween II, and she's pretty solid here. She's no Meryl Streep, but Rob Zombie doesn't need Meryl Streep. He needs some crazy looking WomanGirl that looks like she might love you and hold you one moment or stab your fucking eyes the next. 

 

Zombie works from a couple of cool influences, like Polanski(Repulsion and Rosemary's Baby are both represented here) and Stanley Kubrick with obvious Shining references and a 2001 Phantasmagoria sequence to cap off the film(with some Eyes Wide Shut dashed in for good measure). Another director Zombie seems to call to mind is Dario Argento, not just in certain visual elements in the film, but because both put plot secondary to mood and feeling. Visually it's an interesting one to watch, and it does capture some of that New England Autumn Gray Death feeling that I love and associate with Halloween. Not everything in the movie clicks, but what does work works pretty well.

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Because of time constraints, I'm gonna skip putting a summary of the films because I think the majority of hardcore horror fans have seen these films.

 

Edge of the Axe [1988] - This is a little seen, brilliant, late 80s slasher.  While it's a Spanish production, it has a very Americana feel and I love horror films set in small towns.  The premise is quite simple, a deranged knife yielding killer in an incredibly creepy mask goes on a killing spree.  Unlike a lot of slashers, I thought that this had a lot of likable characters as well as some dispicable ones.  I really enjoyed the twist at the end.  Also instant chat from the late 80s!!!!  Just so much fun watching this.

 

Night of the Living Dead [1968] - This is a rewatch as it's mandatory to watch in October.  Still holds up and is my favorite Romero zombie film.  Martin is my favorite Romero film.

 

From Beyond [1986] - I love H.P. Lovecraft adaptations so I can't believe I hadn't seen this before until yesterday.  One of my favorite "goopy" films.  Lots of great gore and ooze.  There's also some great S&M undertones to this which I think would make a great double with Hellraiser.

 

Tourist Trap [1979] - My favorite of the bunch and this is so up my alley that I really can't believe I haven't seen this before either.  It relies so much on atmosphere and incredibly creepy imagery instead of a ton of gore.  Mannequins creep me out so this really worked for me.  Admittedly, this at times downright creeped me out.  I also watched this in the complete dark in the middle of the night last night with only jack-o-laterns and glowing gimmick skulls to give ambient light.  So, so good.  This will rank right up there with my favorite horror films ever.

 

I was originally thinking of coming up with a Top 100 Favorite Horror Films list but I'm not sure I'll do that but I will work on my Top 31 Favorite Underrated Horror films list.

 

Also to avoid burnout, I'm gonna watch a bunch of different Halloween TV specials or episodes.  Stuff like Tales from the Crypt, Simpsons' Treehouse of Horror, King of the Hill, etc.  As well watch some wrestling such as Halloween Havoc PPVs and Undertaker matches.

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The Werewolf vs. The Vampire Woman (1971)

 

blah-blah-blah...

Marty, were you watching one of the Public Domain copies of the film?

This review describes the Anchor Bay version released under the title Werewolf Shadow that is uncut.

I have an old PD disc of this myself, as I'm a Naschy fan.

 

Wait, there's an uncut version? Hmmm...

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The Hills Have Eyes (1977)

 

Wes Craven brings us a family stranded in the Nevada desert, where they are stalked by a family of cannibalistic freaks.  Like any good horror movie, we don't even get a glimpse of these crazies until the film is almost half over...and then all Hell breaks loose as we get to meet each and every one of the nuts that inhabit this little family from Hell.  Madness ensues.

 

There's so much great stuff going on in this movie, and it's so frantic and violent and outright INSANE that there's no wonder it's a cult classic. Everyone is so over the top with their reactions to the crap happening to them (or the crap they are causing), that you can't help but be entertained. The ending does kinda get corny in spots, with some really wretched dialogue, but the manic energy is kept throughout. And of course, our heroes are pushed to the brink and end up behaving like monsters in the end, too: in that regard, the ending was abrupt, but powerful. Fun stuff.  

 

GRADE: B+

 

 

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The Werewolf vs. The Vampire Woman (1971)

 

Things that have never been seen by human beings! The blood flows like vintage wine!

 

First, bad dialogue and even worse acting has been seen by human beings. Multiple times.  Second, there is barely any blood in a film where a vampire and a werewolf clash in some shoddy little castle in the middle of Eastern Europe. If that is how wine flows in your neck of the woods, I'd suggest searching for a better liquor-serving establishment. Pronto.

 

Now before we continue, let me say I *love* bad horror movies. My favorite monster movie is Q, and my all-time favorite horror movie is Death Bed.  Both of them are campy and horrible and ridiculous...but they also pass into the "so bad it's good" realm of cheesy entertainment. This movie does no such thing.  It just sucks.

 

Not to be crass (scratch that: it's my review and I'll be as crass as I want), but the big problem here is nudity. How the Hell is a movie from 1971 about women being stalked by a female vampire and saved by a questionably handsome werewolf NOT simply break down into a softcore pornfest? Anyone? They have at least eight different opportunities to strip naked and save this film, and they take the "high road" every time. This is neither the time or the place for such nonsense.

 

The ending is ridiculous. The final showdown is weak, and the "big twist" at the end is lame.  The film screams nothing more than "81 minutes of my life that I'll never get back." What a horrible start to this project.  

 

GRADE: F

 

Is this a Naschy? No wonder it sucked. I only saw one of his werewolf movies (Curse of the Devil?) and it was also coma-inducing levels of boring even with tits included. Of course, I actually liked a non-werewolf movie of his "The Hunchback at The Morgue" as vintage Eurotrash B-movie sleaze. Yes, Naschy plays the titular hunchback and yes the hunchback gets some and we get to see it.

 

I'm still compelled to getting around to seeing Wolfman vs. The Yeti. http://www.grindhousedatabase.com/index.php/The_Night_of_the_Howling_Beast

That just sounds too random and thrown together to totally foul up.

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DAY 2 of 31 THE LORDS OF SALEM

I'm going to be a little brief here because I'm going to do a little longer write up for my blog, looking at some shot compositions and themes later today. But I can tell you this is pretty enjoyable. I'd probably put it in the area of Devil's Rejects and Halloween II. I have zero problem with Sherri Moon. I actually quite like her. I thought she was good in Halloween II, and she's pretty solid here. She's no Meryl Streep, but Rob Zombie doesn't need Meryl Streep. He needs some crazy looking WomanGirl that looks like she might love you and hold you one moment or stab your fucking eyes the next. 

 

Zombie works from a couple of cool influences, like Polanski(Repulsion and Rosemary's Baby are both represented here) and Stanley Kubrick with obvious Shining references and a 2001 Phantasmagoria sequence to cap off the film(with some Eyes Wide Shut dashed in for good measure). Another director Zombie seems to call to mind is Dario Argento, not just in certain visual elements in the film, but because both put plot secondary to mood and feeling. Visually it's an interesting one to watch, and it does capture some of that New England Autumn Gray Death feeling that I love and associate with Halloween. Not everything in the movie clicks, but what does work works pretty well.

 

I thought The Lords Of Salem crossed the line from self indulgence into full blown self flagellation. This story didn't need 100 minutes to be told and I didn't feel all the random visuals thrown at the viewer ever amounted to very much. I didn't even think the visuals presented in the ending worked as even a bad Zombie music video. And I like most of Zombie's music videos.....

 

 

Now if the ending had blown me away I could somewhat forgive the bloated run time because it would've actually all led to something. Certain visuals in the ending seemed more juvenile or crass than unnerving....you know exactly what I'm referring to. But yep overall too much wannabe Artsy Fartistry (for the sake of it) for my tastes not to mention that just because this was a plodding movie doesn't mean every reference and touch thrown in worked with the deft nuance of a Polanski or Kubrick. Argento though? Sure. I mean you know you're throwing every POS cult reference at the wall when guys walking goats on leashes show up wearing the stone Zardoz godhead.

 

As for influences I'll throw another one out there..... the final denouement sort of came across as an inversion of The Sentinel (1977.)

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I didn't really feel the length, so that wasn't a problem for me.

 

But I will agree with you that some of the visuals did not work at all. The big climax for example looked pretty awful when the animation came in. Just because he was influenced by these people DOES NOT mean he does it half as well. I think the movie works best in the quieter segments, because the mood works. When it's time to pay off the anticipation with some type of action that's when he falters. For example when Heidi goes into the room to have sex with Satan. The lead up to that was great. And then when it was time for the action - it became comical and juvenile. This actually happened quite a bit with his more jumpy scares. Like when Satan clomps into her bedroom with that music punctuating each flap of his feet. 

 

I think Rob Zombie has some great ideas, and this movie has more cool ones than a lot of his others. But he's not particularly graceful when it comes to getting across his big ideas. DICKS IN YOU FACE! 

 

What I do like about him is that he pretty much goes for it. Whatever the hell is on his mind he puts it out there, or tries to anyway. He has a unique voice that sometimes doesn't say anything interesting or says it too loud, but it's refreshing to have around.

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