The Green Meanie Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 WWE Backlash: Oww My Balls or WWE Backlash: No Title Changes For You Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rows Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 I can watch Braun run over KO every week. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Man Known as Dan Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 Cut off the last 3 minutes of Miz//Rollins and it was one of my favorite matches of the year. The Superplex spot and a 2nd finisher kickout was too much, though the actual finish was good. The rest of the show was booked by idiots. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
piranesi Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 This show was quite a month-long slow-motion kick to the nuts. The first two matches had me excited and into it. Alexa is so fantastic. Miz is so fantastic. They both deserve so much better. Then the One-Two punch of Randy Orton being like a treadmill workout to watch and Carmella being some kind of Kroll Show version of a wrestler staggered me...hard. Even though I left the room for Orton, the sheer power of his boringness seeped into the wifi and contaminated my bones. And watching Charlotte Flair have to play fight with a strange defective blonde child and lose was bewildering and embarassing like a skit at a family picnic where the family has a prodigious child that likes to put on skits and we all have to watch them. But then Elias splashed some water on my face and told me I could do it. And you know what? I think I can! Thanks, Elias! You are so great! Please do more. Then Big Cass put me in a sleeper hold and I tried and tried to keep going because I knew Daniel Bryan would save me. And then he did! He ended it, pretty quickly and told me now we could be together. But then a PA announcement decreed that Big Cass was going to never ever ever stop being there and ruining Daniel Bryan and I wept openly because I knew I was in the Clockwork Orange world and everything is just going to be like this and never make sense always. And then AJ Styles and Nakamura wrestled for, something like 7 hours and for nothing. For nothing. They wrestled for 3 days without food or sleep and then on the third day they just said "That's that we're leaving now." And the people said "But why did you even? Why did we even?" And they said "We just like cardio bye." And why can't they just FUCKING DO SOMETHING????? And I lay down and closed my eyes and tried to stop breathing. Then they reminded me there were still TWO matches left and my soul left my body. And then there was a Three Stooges short, which was nice, except it was a little weird because Moe was fat and Canadian and Larry was Syrian and they had all the best punch lines. I think it was a Joe Dorita, because the third guy wasn't funny and he was black and it was weird because it was like the only one where Vernon Dent wins and beats the shit out of the stooges and was a giant hillbilly. I may have been having a death mirage at that point. Then they introduced Roman Reigns and turned down the crowd noise so much and so suddenly that my Roku stuttered and told me to check my audio settings. And when I went into settings to check them, my Roku spoke to me and said "Look, we're out right now. We're out and they don't know it. We don't have to go back, you know. We can just not go back. You know nothing good is going on in there." But I knew I had to go back. I did and Mchael Cole quickly told me someone "has absolutely no absence of malice" and I knew I wanted to live if only that I meet Michael Cole some day and punch him in the mouth. So I guess I have to give this show a thumb up. I can't right now because my brain has shut down to the point that I cannot send the "up" signal to either thumb. But I will pencil it in to do alter since despite literally killing my soul and squatting down and squat-peeing into my grave hole for hours and hours, in the end it renewed my desire to live, even if the only reason I have to wake up and locomote my beaten and dessicated body out into the world in the morning is the small chance I might get to punch Michael Cole in the mouth some day. Some day.... I'm writing all of this during the main event, which is so boring that this is what I'm doing while it's on. This and literally looking at review of the tactical LED flashlight that you deep fry and then feed to an alligator and then roll over the alligator with a truck wheel and then when the dying alligator poops out the tactical LED flashlight, it will still melt the retinas of any intruder when you focus down the beam to a tiny dot. The reviews are pretty good. Let this chronicle be a warning to any and all who might stumble into this show. It is not your friend. It is poison. Oh, Roman Reigns won. Okay. Cool. My grave hole is getting warmer. Nice. Oh my god, now two dummies are going to describe all of this for money on a thing I'm paying them for and I'm going to watch it because I am a fucking brain dead slug. All in all, this was a great experience, guys! 10 4 10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Niners Fan in CT Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 I'm confused. Roman passed out and the ref didn't call the match? Man there were some horrible finishes tonight. That seems to be the case for every event lately. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Niners Fan in CT Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 Also, yeeeeeaaahhh.... not good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rehabilitated Rick Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 show peaked at Miz/Seth, picked up again at Bobby Roode twerking then it died a sorry death Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rows Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 They need to quit having Roman main event. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dolfan in NYC Posted May 7, 2018 Author Share Posted May 7, 2018 3 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
piranesi Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 Just now, Dolfan in NYC said: THEN WHY DID U ALMOST CORPSE< RUSEV DAY????? WHY DID YOU ALMOST CORPs!!!!????? 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Niners Fan in CT Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 Oh and let me get this straight. Charlotte ends Asuka's big winning streak at WrestleMania because.... well, I guess it'd make sense if she was going on a streak of her own and heading towards Ronda. But fast-forward a month and Carmella cashes in and then beats Charlotte CLEAN... Yeah, she tweaked her leg, whatever. It's clean. And lost in all of this... Asuka isn't even on the fucking PPV. Now, I remember some people saying they didn't have a problem with Charlotte winning at WM. Have you changed your mind now? 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maciej Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 Loved the opener but damn, all the match structure decisions on the rest of that show, it's like they're trying to make it easier to stop watching when they bring back Hogan. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Green Meanie Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 2 minutes ago, Niners Fan in CT said: Also, yeeeeeaaahhh.... not good. I laughed out loud so much once the bell rang and they cut to the crowd rushing for the exits. Kevin Dunn, were you not paying attention? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nofuture Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 Does every match have to have an extended heel chin lock? The way they book him, Roman is just poison out there. The more they try, the worse it get. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maciej Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 That main event teasing us with the very fun opening too, god damn. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Niners Fan in CT Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 Rusev Day. CM Punk. THIS IS BORING. Etc.. That never happened with Cena. Say what you want about Cena, half the crowd hated him but they were at least INVESTED. It's to the point now where nobody gives a shit at all about anything Roman is doing. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sydneybrown Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 I LOVED THAT Miz-Rollins match. And that's even with the Davey Richards spot. Which I hated. But that was still a great match. Fuck that last hour. Owens, Sami, Joe. They are apparently fucking useless. WWE somehow thinks Bobby Lashley...IN 2018...Is the one guy worth protecting... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamal Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 I’m not sure who’s supposed to be the worst friend between Bayley and Sasha anymore. Lol The IIconics are perfectly annoying. Loved Booker’s “what the Hell was that” when they invaded during the pre-show. Cool to see Carmella retain. Sucks that they had her losing so much, with the briefcase, that winning hurts Charlotte more than it actually elevates her. Always strange to see Bliss dominating Nia. And I cringed at Nia being booed while giving her anti-bullying promo. I knew those Moment of Bliss promos would turn the crowd. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian Fowler Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 The Miz is basically the best thing in the company right now 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
piranesi Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 I've seen Jerry Lewis telethons that didn't 1) Last as long as this show 2) End with as much of a big dumb guy no one really likes pretending that we're all there for him 3) have as much Schticky comedy and bizarre musical acts at odd hours 4) Make me miss Buddy Hackett/Bobby Heenan and wish he was hosting instead 5 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matt D Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 I think Dusty is booking these shows. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Web Conn Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 I think it's time Trips and Steph organize a co and get the board to vote Vince out. They need to go in another direction. the crowd isn't going to turn around on Roman. Get Triple H in there as Chairmen bring Borash in and get Dunn out and lets turn this ship around. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Green Meanie Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 3 minutes ago, Jamal said: And I cringed at Nia being booed while giving her anti-bullying promo. I knew those Moment of Bliss promos would turn the crowd. It didn't help they made Nia mention Be A Star, it make the speech sound even more scripted then it already was. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rehabilitated Rick Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 Miz tearing down Rosenberg was worth staying up to nearly 5am Just realized Miz could potentially win the MITB and cash in on a newly crowned D Brine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Niners Fan in CT Posted May 7, 2018 Share Posted May 7, 2018 They have two perfectly fine choices for Universal Champion right now. They could go with Braun which is super obvious or they could go with babyface Rollins which I know some here wouldn't like but I think it would also work. So Braun or Rollins. But instead we gonna continue to force Roman or what? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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