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RIPPA

2018 HORROR MOVIE THREAD

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14 hours ago, J.T. said:

That is dumb.  The urban myth that there is a longer edit of Suspiria was debunked long ago.  Why make a version of Suspria that is unbearably longer than the first?

I was already concerned enough that some Claudio Fuccifiknowli guy (who I never heard of) was the director.

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8 hours ago, FluffSnackwell said:

I was already concerned enough that some Claudio Fuccifiknowli guy (who I never heard of) was the director.

This will become a thing in the Horror Thread now.

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On 7/31/2018 at 7:53 AM, RIPPA said:

The Suspiria remake will run a hour longer than the original (152 minutes as compared to 92)

At least we know it's not a shot for shot remake.

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I was watching the (in my opinion underrated) Friday the 13th remake last night, and I discovered that the preppy antagonist character who owns the lake house is also the same character that’s  Shia LaBeouf’s bully in Transformers. Michael Bay gets a lot of deserved criticism, but good on him for putting Transformers and Jason in the same cinematic universe. 

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I'm watching The Descent right now. I'm also entirely certain this movie could be nothing but crawling through tight spaces and still be considered horror. 

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4 hours ago, Contentious C said:

I'm watching The Descent right now. I'm also entirely certain this movie could be nothing but crawling through tight spaces and still be considered horror. 

It really really could. It's terrifying even before it gets terrifying.

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Well I finally got this framed, time to hang it up in the Movie/gaming room!

zg4S1ja.jpg

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Nice! I woke up the other morning and The Evil of Frankenstein was on one of the Starz channels. Had shit to do or else I would have stuck around to see the box-head monster in that one. 

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I watched "The Neighbor" last night. Basically the team behind "The Collector" stripped the torture elements from that construct, kept the kidnapping for ransom primary plot and cast one of the Blue Collar Comedy rednecks as the main villain. Naturally Stan from True Detective Season Bolo Tie is one of the redneck's sons. The thief guy that appears in both The Collector & The Collection is even the unlucky neighbor whose girlfriend sees too much. I'd have rather those fucksticks just went ahead and made "The Collected" instead. Bill Engvall was alright. I bet "Tater Salad" Ron White could play one hell of a dirtbag.

I watched "Let Me Make You A Martyr" too. So many assholes from Sons of Anarchy were in it that I think they just filmed this during down time between shooting the series. It was neck deep in a bunch of the same old tired white trash pleasantries while also wanting to be an allegory.

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On ‎8‎/‎3‎/‎2018 at 11:21 PM, Contentious C said:

I'm watching The Descent right now. I'm also entirely certain this movie could be nothing but crawling through tight spaces and still be considered horror. 

On ‎8‎/‎4‎/‎2018 at 4:19 AM, Brian Fowler said:

It really really could. It's terrifying even before it gets terrifying.

It didn't even need to have blind, man-eating humanoids or claustrophobic caverns for it to be a horror movie to me.

I was done when the British chick broke her leg.

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Oh, and unless you avoided USA Network all weekend, you saw this trailer being played every hour on the hour.

For a second during the opening scene, I thought it was a sequel to *31 until THE PURGE suddenly appears on my screen.

I was kinda hoping that the female figure swinging the bat around was:

 

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Watched "The Babysitter" on Netflix the other night, and damn did they ever nail that perfect self-aware slasher sweet spot. Great character, lots of genuinely clever bits (The blood spray running gag is great) and a bunch of quality actors scene chewing as the villains (though Robbie Amell comes close to stealing the movie). Check it out if you have 90 minutes to kill.

 

Also finally watching the No End House season of Channel Zero. I love that episode 4 feels like it could have been an ending and I'm expecting the last two to get pretty wild. I liked what I've seen of Candle Cove (half finished it and now need to rewatch the first half to finish the second, wife hates rewatching so it's down to me watching on my own to get back to where we were at to finish it) but No End House hits a lot harder a lot faster and has some pretty great surprises as it goes. The only problem is that

I never trusted Seth for a second. Dude 100% looked and felt like someone who would turn out to be a secret villain.

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Season 3 of Channel Zero is great for reasons far different than the previous two.

There is still the ever present theme of dysfunctional family going on, but Butcher's Block is far more visceral when it comes to imagery..

Poor Slender Man movie.  Only 13% on RT. 

One of the reviews is kinda bullshit since his main reason for not liking the movie is a "Too Soon After Tragic Stabbing Attack" rationale which is really dumb. 

Other reviews cite the usual formulaic stuff that makes most horror movies feel generic ala jump scares and the like.  Those criticisms are probably legit.  

Quite a few of the reviews say that there is a good horror movie in there somewhere and it was probably left on the editing room floor in the effort to make this thing come in with a PG-13 rating.  Maybe I will wait to see if this thing comes out on Netflix or On Demand in an Unrated version before I check it out.

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On ‎8‎/‎9‎/‎2018 at 5:23 PM, The Unholy Dragon said:

I liked what I've seen of Candle Cove (half finished it and now need to rewatch the first half to finish the second, wife hates rewatching so it's down to me watching on my own to get back to where we were at to finish it) but No End House hits a lot harder a lot faster and has some pretty great surprises as it goes. 

If you need help with catching up and making heads or tails of weird shit, I highly recommend hitting up the Human Echoes channel on YouTube and checking out the re-cap / analysis videos for the previous seasons of Channel Zero.

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NSFW screencap (a hatchet in a head, big deal) 

Spoiler

 

Severin has put out some crazy shit but this might be the nadir. A Grim Reaper plushie that you can pull the guts out of?!

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Searching

Starring: John Cho, Debra Messing, Joseph Lee. Michelle La

Directed by Aneesh Chaganty

This movie looks like it will do the Unfriended laptop set piece much better than Unfriended did.

Being a divorced dad with a teen daughter, this premise of this movie absolutely terrifies me.

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Halloween

Starring:  Jamie Lee Curtis, Judy Greer, Andi Matichak, Will Patton, 

with Nick Castleand James Jude Courtne as Michael Myers / The Shape

Directed by David Gordon Green

Executive Producer: JOHN CARPENTER

I think I may actually go and see this.  We may finally get the H2O we deserve.

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And without further adieu, my 15 year old daughter's review of Slender Man.

Quote

My dad took me to see this last night.  I could tell he wanted to see Cowboy Bebop instead, but it was my turn to pick.  I should have picked The Meg, but mom wanted me home before nine.

This movie was not as bad as the reviews said, but it was not as good as I wanted it to be.  I think its funny that some of the critics said bad things about this movie because of the acting in Marble Hornets, Everyman Hybrid and Tribe Twelve didn't exactly win Oscars. 

Well, the guy that was HABIT in Everyman Hybrid was pretty good.

I think the main problem with this movie is that it is not Slendery enough.  They only used the pictures from the internet I have seen a billion times when you weren't checking my phone to connect this to the Slender Man.  There wasn't much else from the YouTube games or anything to make Slender Man seem different from any other boogeyman. 

They didn't even make one of the girls a proxy or mess up the video or the sound or make someone get sick to let you know he's nearby.

You could've put Bloody Mary as the monster and not changed anything else and the movie would still feel the same..

Also, the way they tried to make Slender Man scary was kinda dumb.  Instead of making things creepy like Marble Hornets did and have you be able to notice Slender Man just out of sight and always watching in the background when the actors don't see him, they just went for jump scares and stuff.  That's not the way Slender Man works and that's not what makes him frightening.

Oh, and what the girl's little sister said at the end of the movie was also dumb.  I couldn't tell if she was talking about Slender Man being bad or if she was trying to say that the way Creepypastas work is bad.  If it was the second part, I don't agree.  Creepypastas are fun! 

If you are tricked into thinking that Jeff the Killer or the Rake are real things, then it worked and you should probably improve your Google skills and be better at researching hoaxes.

I think this movie could've been really good if it had been more Slendery.  I could make a better Slender movie and I am just a kid.

I was surprised that she knew what a proxy was in the context of the Slender Man mythology. 

I am indeed going to have to check her phone more often.

And I agree with my kid. 

The writers really missed the boat when it came to incorporating the things from the ARGs that made Slender Man so menacing.  Not even a classic Marble Hornets style shot where the girls jabbered on about boys or something, unaware that Slender Man is watching on ominously in the background.

This movie probably would've been 10000% better if they'd embraced more Slender man gimmicks like announcing his presence to the audience via lens tearing and audio distortion while leaving the characters clueless to his whereabouts or making one of the characters in the movie an antagonist by turning them a proxy.

There was one instance where one of the girls has some weird dream sequence similar to one of Milo's Tribe Twelve blackouts, but the imagery was generic nightmare fuel.

As my daughter so eloquently put it, this movie is not as Slendery as it should be.  This isn't so much a bad movie as it is a very disappointing one.

You will have to keep getting your Slender Man fixes from Mike Diva's short, Proxy, the Big 3 ARGs, and the fan-made Slender Man movie directed by AJ Meadows.

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The Russian horror movie, Rusalka, that came out this past July will be retitled Mermaid:  Lake of the Dead when or if it ever sees the light of day in the US.

Most likely we won't see a theater release.  It will end up on Netflix or something.

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Down a Dark Hall with Uma Thurman should sneak into theaters this Friday (August 17th).

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The Little Stranger (Domhnall Gleeson, Oliver Zetterström, Ruth Wilson, Will Poulter, Charlotte Rampling) based on Sarah Walters's neo-gothic 2008 novel should be out by August 31st.

That is a pretty impressive cast.

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Unfriended:  Dark Web seems to have left theaters as quietly as it entered them.

I will have to Redbox the damn thing once it is out on DVD.

I will continue to remain deliberately oblivious to the plot as it is my understanding that it is better to go into this thing not knowing what it's really about.

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