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The Awesome/Annoying TV COMMERCIAL Thread


piranesi
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Posted (edited)

Wondering about this weird thing and maybe someone can explain it. I was at Walmart today because I'm a GODDAMMNED GOOD AMERICAN!

and so now they have this fake radio station with a fake DJ talking on the sound system instead of just background music. Which is fine, I kind of dug the idea. But I quickly noticed that he would do DJ chatter for awhile and then play a song, but they would only play 15-30 seconds of the song before switching to another song. They did this over and over and never played a whole song or even half a song.

I'm wondering is this:

1) some kind of copyright dodge? Like playing 15 seconds of a song on Tik Tok or something?

2) Some Psyop where they experimented on people and determined that if you keep switching songs rapidly people will somehow buy more?

3) they mixed styles up frequently, like every other song was a different style, so maybe their focus group coprorate mega brain was like "If we change the music style ever few seconds everyone will be happy because a style they like will filter around every few minutes?

 

Anyway I hate it. Whatever the reason it's just another little dystopian detail of late capitalism here everything is a simulacrum of a real thing but not really a real thing.  I would prefer going back to Mantovani than this nightmare.

Edited by piranesi
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The music is from a satellite feed, and there are multiple channels with different genres that are chosen for individual stores based on local demographics. Sometimes they glitch (usually because of bad weather) and go into scan mode. When I had a retail job it would be a nice break from hearing every Bruce Hornsby single all day every day for years. 

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On 4/22/2022 at 10:03 PM, piranesi said:

Whatever it was I was hearing can be found in some form here.

https://www.listennotes.com/fi/podcasts/walmart-radio/no-format-friday-I0JxYlpDSqb/#1

 

apparently "Walmart Radio" has pre-recorded shows that they release as "podcasts" and they play those in my store.

 

On 4/22/2022 at 10:19 PM, (BP) said:

Oh, no, that’s some Verhoeven shit for sure. Very “we’re all normal here” energy. 

LOOOOL I recently started doing my regular grocery shopping there.  I don't like the company or its practices but fuck it, when I'm trying to save money and pay off debt, spending 40-80 per week less on groceries is not a hard choice.  I shop there on Friday mornings and "Wal Mart Radio" weirded me the fuck out from the get go.  I'm especially mystified by the alleged employees calling in and giving shout outs to other employees.  "This is Mikey from store number 3472 in Ontario California!  I want to thank the overnight crew and the dudes who build the bicycles!"  WTF.  This is some real dystopian shit.  I'm glad I'm not suffering alone and my DVDVR e-bros are in it with me 😛

I often wonder about the demographics of the music selection whenever I hear whitebread-ass pop country music singing about how fun being poor is while I'm shopping with mostly black and latino folks in the far-flung DC suburbs.

Edited by Technico Support
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OH and speaking of commercials, do you guys get the Army advertisements during Dynamite?  The ones that show Army dudes, under cover of night, blowing up some door and infiltrating a building?  And the text on the screen is like "you could do this in real life!"  Fuck.  Could they target the COD-playing incels harder?  Not to mention that for every sign-up that actually gets to play out his video game fantasy, a few hundred will be on janitorial duty and things of that nature.

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44 minutes ago, Technico Support said:

I often wonder about the demographics of the music selection whenever I hear whitebread-ass pop country music singing about how fun being poor is while I'm shopping with mostly black and latino folks in the far-flung DC suburbs.

This is why they need statehood, Walmart radio representation. 

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1 hour ago, Technico Support said:

OH and speaking of commercials, do you guys get the Army advertisements during Dynamite?  The ones that show Army dudes, under cover of night, blowing up some door and infiltrating a building?  And the text on the screen is like "you could do this in real life!"  Fuck.  Could they target the COD-playing incels harder?  Not to mention that for every sign-up that actually gets to play out his video game fantasy, a few hundred will be on janitorial duty and things of that nature.

Eh.  Army knows what they are doing.  There is a shortage of killers in Big Green right now as no one willingly signs up for Infantry.

New crop of millennial volunteers are smart and go into either Logistics or Signal so that they can find jobs in the real world after they leave the service and collect their GI Bill college money.  They would cheerfully choose "sanitation engineer" over getting shot at any day of the week.  It takes a special kind of crazy to go into one of the MOS's that requires you to fire a weapon in anger and kill somebody.

Gone are the days of DC Comics' SGT Rock and the career trigger pulling donk.

Edited by J.T.
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48 minutes ago, Technico Support said:

OH and speaking of commercials, do you guys get the Army advertisements during Dynamite?  The ones that show Army dudes, under cover of night, blowing up some door and infiltrating a building?  And the text on the screen is like "you could do this in real life!"  Fuck.  Could they target the COD-playing incels harder?  Not to mention that for every sign-up that actually gets to play out his video game fantasy, a few hundred will be on janitorial duty and things of that nature.

This type of Armed Forces sales tactic doesn't bother me as much as the stealth tactics they use in the USAA Car Insurance and Navy Federal Credit Union spots.

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5 hours ago, Technico Support said:

I often wonder about the demographics of the music selection whenever I hear whitebread-ass pop country music singing about how fun being poor is while I'm shopping with mostly black and latino folks in the far-flung DC suburbs.

It's even harder working with a black 20-someodd guy that has a bad speech impediment, who likely got picked on relentlessly in school by people that liked pop country, loving the exact same music and trying to be friendly and get you into it. I've told this kid a thousand times "I don't like that shit, I like old country" but he won't relent. It's like Stockholm Syndrome... which is apparently what Walmart Radio's people have.

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  • 4 weeks later...

Currently in Ireland and was in the UK last week, both of these commercials gave me holy shit reactions.

Why Dame Judi Dench why?
 

Never a huge Oasis fan(more of a Blur guy) but ouch, did the brothers really need the money?

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Watching Dynamite last night, there was some ridiculous commercial where puppets or some nonsense were getting Drumstick ice cream tattoos. I don’t know but is was like some weird mind trip.

Looks like they’ve been uploaded to the Drumstick YouTube page too (which I didn’t even know was a thing).
 

https://youtube.com/c/Drumstick

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