cool arrow Posted May 1, 2014 Share Posted May 1, 2014 I hate all the commercials for Windows phones and tablets and whatnot, solely because the music makes no sense. "Honestly I want to see you be brave." What the fuck does that even mean, and what does it have to do with Microsoft? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Koch Posted May 1, 2014 Share Posted May 1, 2014 I want to know who the fuck made those Geico Talking Pictures commercials. Also because they're all over the fucking place online before YouTube videos and flash games and shit. Insurance commericals as a whole can fuck the right off, especially because every other commercial seems to be schilling shitty products in the most annoying fashion possible. Of course, Flo and the Geico gecko have a special level of hate (chessesteak shuffle, ugh). The State Farm ones really annoy me. Like just signing their jingle will make them act like a genie and magically make them give you money. Especially the one where the guy's harpy mom "six cawlahs ahead of us Jimmy" - as if you call State Farm and they don't have any wait times. I used to work in a call center so I feel bad for the people that work at the State Farm one. I'm sure these commercials give your average idiot unreasonable expectations so they probably have to deal with all sorts of douchebaggery "what do you mean I have to wait for my check? You commercials show people getting money rained on them." Ugh. After my time on phones, I have a new level of hatred for marketing/ad "geniuses". The other one that gets me is the Allstate one where President Palmer booms "Jenny is on a budget, a ramen noodles every night kind of budget". Basically the commercial is saying - hey, you can't eat, but you should still buy insurance. Fuck off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RandomAct Posted May 1, 2014 Share Posted May 1, 2014 I hate all the commercials for Windows phones and tablets and whatnot, solely because the music makes no sense. "Honestly I want to see you be brave." What does the fuck does that even mean, and what does it have to do with Microsoft? There is something incredibly smug and annoying about the business owner chick. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
muhammedboehm Posted May 1, 2014 Share Posted May 1, 2014 I hate all the commercials for Windows phones and tablets and whatnot, solely because the music makes no sense. "Honestly I want to see you be brave." What does the fuck does that even mean, and what does it have to do with Microsoft?There is something incredibly smug and annoying about the business owner chick. You mean the way she says 'that's me' when the delivery guy asks for the boss? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SovietShooter Posted May 2, 2014 Share Posted May 2, 2014 It is also unrealistic. Delivery guys do not give one single fuck who signs. They just want to get to the next stop. They sure as hell ain't waiting around for "the boss". 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RandomAct Posted May 2, 2014 Share Posted May 2, 2014 Exactly. It's not like it's the fucking armoured cash truck. "I'm the boss". Get fucked lady. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
piranesi Posted May 16, 2014 Author Share Posted May 16, 2014 I hate this cutesy kind of music more than maybe any other form of music. And we're going on like eight years of it being in commercials. Like, the same song, the same chords and rhythms...and now they don't even write lyrics for it anymore so it can be applied to every product everywhere forever. It's just "Oh, oh oh oh oh....La La la la la...Na na na na na Oh OH OH OH." FUCKNG RAGE Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cool arrow Posted May 17, 2014 Share Posted May 17, 2014 I have a problem with every Starburst commercial. For decades now, they've been allowed to claim that their product is "juicy." No. No, it's not. That's your fucking SALIVA. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J.T. Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 Okay, I really hated the Sprint Framily commercials until this one came out. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BltL8vKpXD0 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RIPPA Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 Someone might have mentioned this already but those DirecTV no strings commercials need to die in a fire Especially the one with the wife doing the strip tease 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrianS81177 Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 ALL satellite commercials can die in a fire. If someone bludgeoned every member of the "Hoppah" family I would buy them a big juicy steak. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RandomAct Posted May 24, 2014 Share Posted May 24, 2014 Someone might have mentioned this already but those DirecTV no strings commercials need to die in a fire Especially the one with the wife doing the strip tease I have so many questions that I probably don't want to have answered that comes from the DirectTV commercials. I mean.....they have a kid...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cool arrow Posted May 24, 2014 Share Posted May 24, 2014 Yeesh. The word splinters just popped into my head... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Koch Posted May 24, 2014 Share Posted May 24, 2014 ALL satellite commercials can die in a fire. If someone bludgeoned every member of the "Hoppah" family I would buy them a big juicy steak. I think they finally got rid of those morons, the last couple of Dish commercials I've seen use a cartoon kangaroo to advertise the hopper. And yeah those marionette commercials are fucking creepy, like something out of a Takeshi Miike movie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J.T. Posted May 24, 2014 Share Posted May 24, 2014 Oh, my God. Whomever came up with the not all wires are bad marketing thing for Direct TV needs to jump into a swimming pool full of radioactive pirannah. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
piranesi Posted May 24, 2014 Author Share Posted May 24, 2014 They will payoff when it is revealed that the "normal" dude is a maladjusted puppeteer who stumbled onto a book of black magic and has enslaved the people around him into his "family" and no one is doing anything because they are afraid they will be next. Did you never see DOLLS? In the end they will merely be fed to Wendy's Lady's army of hipster office drones in one of the filler PPV's until they can build up a real challenger for her. If they need to fill another month, they can feud with Hopper guys first. But we know we're all really waiting for the big push for Jake from State Farm who's been midcarding forever now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J.T. Posted May 24, 2014 Share Posted May 24, 2014 They will payoff when it is revealed that the "normal" dude is a maladjusted puppeteer who stumbled onto a book of black magic and has enslaved the people around him into his "family" and no one is doing anything because they are afraid they will be next. Did you never see DOLLS? Mannequins and puppets are not to be trusted. This short from USA Saturday Nightmares fucked me up when I was a kid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J.T. Posted May 24, 2014 Share Posted May 24, 2014 Speaking of creepy commercials, I sure am glad the people at Sony apparently fucking fired everyone in their marketing department. The current Sharing is Caring campaign for PS4 is not nearly as disturbing as some of their PS3 weird shit. What the fuck were you smoking back then, guys? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cool arrow Posted May 24, 2014 Share Posted May 24, 2014 Anyone old enough to remember the movie "Magic" with Anthony Hopkins? Just the TV commercial for it scared the shit out of me. Granted I was only 8 years old, but it's still fucking creepy. Witness. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J.T. Posted May 24, 2014 Share Posted May 24, 2014 Jesus, are we going to have to re-create the TRAUMATIZING MOVIE TRAILERS thread from three boards ago. I think I still have the trailer for It's Alive saved somewhere on CD. How the fuck did kids sleep back then with trailers like that and toy commercials like this on television? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ryan Posted May 24, 2014 Share Posted May 24, 2014 Thanks a lot, now I'm hiding in my closet with a bat. Edit: I wonder how terrifying the ad for this one would be... "1969 Baby Sister Grow-A-Tooth" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
piranesi Posted May 24, 2014 Author Share Posted May 24, 2014 Thanks a lot, now I'm hiding in my closet with a bat. You know they understand fire and self-sacrifice, right? Closet is no refuge. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J.T. Posted May 24, 2014 Share Posted May 24, 2014 There was a brilliant commercial for the Resident Evil 4 game that featured a naked mother breast feeding a baby (nudity wasn't gratuitous, but it wasn't exactly safe for work either) and the mom turned out to be a zombie. That advert was scary for all of the right reasons. Most of the creepy commercials I've seen on television usually get the response of, "What the fuck were you thinking?" from me rather than "Holy shit, that's awesome!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J.T. Posted May 24, 2014 Share Posted May 24, 2014 Speaking of creepy commercials, I sure am glad the people at Sony apparently fucking fired everyone in their marketing department. The current Sharing is Caring campaign for PS4 is not nearly as disturbing as some of their PS3 weird shit. My shoulder surfing co-worker just made a joke about not knowing that Natalie Dormer did Sony commercials. I may have to buy him dinner at The Tilted Kilt this afternoon. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J.T. Posted May 24, 2014 Share Posted May 24, 2014 WHO COMES UP WITH THIS DISTURBO SHIT~? Ice cream will never cheer me up ever again. If there is ever an unsettling Krispy Kreme commercial, I am just going to slowly walk into the ocean. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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