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Tips on tipping?


Jerome Miller

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5 hours ago, tbarrie said:

Where are people finding restaurants where you still don't enter the tip into the machine yourself when paying by credit card? Is it an American thing?

 

Must be. 99% of the time you don't enter the amount into the machine, just fill out a charge slip. 

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  • 2 weeks later...

Since I live 20 minutes outside the nearest town I can never do delivery,even when I have offered a 20 buck tip to the delivery driver. But at my lady's place she can get delivery.So normally we tip a bit under half what the meal cost us.

For buffets I will drop 2 bucks per person at the table. Went to the good Chinese place in town,we have 3,and it was 3 of us so I left 6 bucks for the waiter.

For non-buffets I will tip around 25 to 30 percent depending on the service. For me good service is as long as the waiter/waitress comes around one time during the meal and refills out drink I will do 30%. If they never come around it is gonna be 25%.

Since there is no bars in the county I live in,and I pretty much quit drinking 5 years ago,I have no idea what I would tip now for drinks.

About 5 months ago we had two recliners and a new mattress delivered from town. I use to do home health care for the owner of the place. Gave the two guys that came out 25 each for not only bringing in the new stuff,but also moving the old stuff and putting it in the bed of the truck.

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That is one area I've unintentionally dropped the ball. One of the times I moved I forgot to have cash on me, and when I had my stove delivered I also had no cash. I never have cash so I have to pre-plan it if its a situation where I am not paying by credit card when the delivery is made. I felt bad both times, for the movers I had a couple 12 packs of beer and they happily took those as a tip. Hopefully they waited til they got home to start drinking.

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The chances of me getting a tattoo are zip, but people in that line of work I generally don't. Like I don't tip the handyman that comes to my house, you charged me $60 for an hours worth of work, you're good. I don't tip mechanics. I mean it can go too far, some jobs are based off tips so those people I tip so they don't make less than minimum wage (delivery drivers, waiters, hair cut people), but if I am paying an individual $20+ or more an hour to do a service I don't tip them on top of that unless they gave me a super sweet deal.

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I don't tip any of those guys, either, but i do tip on tattoos.  Because they're not employees; they're essentially working out of a shop and giving the shop 40 - 60% of what your tattoo costs.  If they have no customers that day or someone cancels, they sometimes still have to pay something just to be there.  Plus they're paying for all their own supplies.  If you tip your hair stylist, you should tip your tattoo guy.

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1 hour ago, Technico Support said:

I don't tip any of those guys, either, but i do tip on tattoos.  Because they're not employees; they're essentially working out of a shop and giving the shop 40 - 60% of what your tattoo costs.  If they have no customers that day or someone cancels, they sometimes still have to pay something just to be there.  Plus they're paying for all their own supplies.  If you tip your hair stylist, you should tip your tattoo guy.

I see your point, I guess to me it would just depend on the tattoo artist. If they are renting a booth so to speak then yea, I'd probably tip them.

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10 hours ago, Technico Support said:

I don't tip any of those guys, either, but i do tip on tattoos.  Because they're not employees; they're essentially working out of a shop and giving the shop 40 - 60% of what your tattoo costs.  If they have no customers that day or someone cancels, they sometimes still have to pay something just to be there.  Plus they're paying for all their own supplies.  If you tip your hair stylist, you should tip your tattoo guy.

This. There's a reason your tattoo artist probably doesn't drive a beamer, and it's not cuz they blow all their money on beer, (though they probably do.)

I tipped ten bucks on this tiny one:

9CDN3P6.jpg?1

 

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My general tipping rules are:

Food (full table service): 15-20 percent of post-tax bill, more if I used a gift card. $5 minimum if a gift card paid my entire tab. (The deciding factor on bigger tips is a mix of "How attentive were they on things like drink refills, bringing the check, etc?" and "how broke am I?")

Food (Buffet and delivery): $1.50 or 10% of post-tax, whichever is more. If I cash in a free pizza delivery, I usually tip $4.

Haircut: $2 or 15%, whichever's more

Bartenders and bar waitstaff: $1 per drink for beer or simple mixes like bourbon and Coke, $2 for anything that isn't just "one liquor and one mixer" or a beer.

Hotel staff: $2 for anything like delivery of sheets/towels.  For the tip left to maids etc I will usually leave $5 per day if i'm alone, more if i'm with others.

Cab/rideshare drivers: $2 or 10%, whichever is more, provided they don't try to fuck me.  You drive past my place after being told exactly where the median break is (necessitating probably a half mile before you can turn around and come back), you get a dollar no matter how big the fare. You drive through neighborhoods instead of the straight shot down the highway at 11pm, you get nothing unless I open Waze or Google Maps and see an accident.

 

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I've stopped tipping most cabbies in my town as they are becoming progressively scummy with the blatant ripoffs. That, and I've nearly been run down in crosswalks by at least 10 different cabbies here...two of whom threatened to fight me if I didn't immediately get out of the crosswalk that was lit for me to walk in.

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On 11/18/2016 at 7:29 PM, tbarrie said:

Where are people finding restaurants where you still don't enter the tip into the machine yourself when paying by credit card? Is it an American thing?

i don't use my debit or credit card for tipping if I can help it because I want to make sure that I put my cash directly into the hands of my server.

It is pretty well known that some restaurants work on a pool system and give a cut from the tip pool to the kitchen staff so that they give the cooks a salary bump without eating into the payroll.

Some restaurants also deduct the credit card fees from the tip and give the waiter / waitress the balance.  That is very very illegal, but it happens.

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On 11/1/2016 at 9:46 AM, Dog said:

How do servers feel about change in their tips? I tend to calculate the 15% and then round up to the next dollar, since I know I personally wouldn't want to deal with a bunch of coins rattling around after a shift.

Has anyone had servers take out BIGGER tips than what you left? I tend not to use cash much, and just add the tip when paying with my card. One time a check ended up costing $20 more than it should have been, but I didn't notice it in my statement until months later, so there wasn't much I could do. Another time it was just a couple bucks and I didn't feel like fighting about it.

It's made me afraid of undetipping or not tipping, even for the worst service. If this guy's already a jerk, who's to say he won't make me pay either way?

One time as a server I accidentally hit the wrong button on the register when i was putting in all my tips. Added ten bucks to my tip. My manager didn't notice when she checked me out, either. Luckily, the customer was one of my regulars, so all he wanted was his ten bucks. I paid him back later that week. Nice guy. Could've been a lot worse. So it's not ALWAYS intentional...

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  • 3 years later...

I was going to create a thread on tipping but there's already one so might as well just bump.

I'm surprised to see so many people say their standard restaurant tip is 20%. Mine is 15% and I consider that to be close to my top end. Probably 18% would be the highest I would ever go. Am I cheap? Of course, I'm not from NA so have had to get used to this silly system over the years. I don't agree with it but I do always tip regardless (I don't think I've ever had a terrible enough experience to warrant giving nothing)

The reason I've brought this back up is because I'm a little sore over the tip I left last night. It was a special occasion so we went out for a family dinner at an upscale restaurant. There was 5 of us and the total came to $275. Without thinking about it I plugged 15% into the machine to give a $40 tip. The waitress could've been a bit friendlier but otherwise no complaints about the service. However, the $40 was more than any of our individual meals cost (excluding appetizers, drinks, desserts) so I essentially paid for six mains for five people.

My question is why is the tip commensurate with the price of the food? The waitress didn't work any harder than a waitress at, say, a Denny's. In fact, the latter probably works harder given how busy breakfast places can be. Yet one gets a $40 tip and one gets a $15 tip. Do high end restaurants pay their staff less on the understanding that they'll get higher tips?

Edited by Swiftian
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5 hours ago, Swiftian said:

I was going to create a thread on tipping but there's already one so might as well just bump.

I'm surprised to see so many people say their standard restaurant tip is 20%. Mine is 15% and I consider that to be close to my top end. Probably 18% would be the highest I would ever go. Am I cheap? Of course, I'm not from NA so have had to get used to this silly system over the years. I don't agree with it but I do always tip regardless (I don't think I've ever had a terrible enough experience to warrant giving nothing)

The reason I've brought this back up is because I'm a little sore over the tip I left last night. It was a special occasion so we went out for a family dinner at an upscale restaurant. There was 5 of us and the total came to $275. Without thinking about it I plugged 15% into the machine to give a $40 tip. The waitress could've been a bit friendlier but otherwise no complaints about the service. However, the $40 was more than any of our individual meals cost (excluding appetizers, drinks, desserts) so I essentially paid for six mains for five people.

My question is why is the tip commensurate with the price of the food? The waitress didn't work any harder than a waitress at, say, a Denny's. In fact, the latter probably works harder given how busy breakfast places can be. Yet one gets a $40 tip and one gets a $15 tip. Do high end restaurants pay their staff less on the understanding that they'll get higher tips?

Let me answer this as best as I can without being totally a jerk. I fully understand that you are not from NA and the tipping thing is unusual to you; that said, when in Rome... $40 on a near $300 tab isn't just bad, it's fucking insulting. No, high end restaurants don't pay less based on thinking that the servers get bigger tips, the general thought is that if you can afford to drop $300 on dinner for five, you certainly can afford to treat your server well unless they were out and out rude or incompetent. 

I'm not saying it's right, but a Denny's counts on quick turnover of tables, their idea is for you to get in, eat and get the fuck out. An upscale restaurant (as you said) is going to count on drinks, wine with dinner, dessert, after dinner drinks or coffee, etc. Different business model, one wants you in and out, the latter wants you to make an evening of it at their establishment. A server at Denny's probably handles three or four parties to one at the upscale place. Obviously, your upscale server is going to be counting on a much bigger tip. Making it commensurate with the food bill is pretty commonplace.  

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John has, of course, explained why tip is commensurate with price of meal rather than 'work'; I can't imagine going to a French restaurant that will maybe turn over tables once per night, or a teppan grill, and acting like it's the same as a steakhouse that expects you to leave after 90m.

 

3 years after I posted in this thread, I'm making significantly more money and so tip better.  Still a buck a drink at bars, but I tend to set a $5 floor for rideshare (unless I can see that they've fucked me on mileage by taking a long route when there's no traffic), haircuts and food delivery because I'm a lot more aware of how hosed those workers generally are.  Buffet waitstaff get $3, sit-down waitstaff I generally figure what 18% is and round up to make the bill an even dollar value.  I'm still sensitive about people trying to take advantage of my disability, or getting cold pizza 3 hrs after I ordered, but my baseline is a lot higher and I'm a lot more aware of what servers and drivers have to go thru.

 

Takeout isn't really an issue for me; since I don't drive, the only things I'm likely to order carryout are the Sonic and Taco Bell in walking distance.

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You failed at not coming across as a jerk, OSJ.

I still don't understand why the tip is based on the price of the food and there wasn't a satisfactory explanation in there. Why does someone get paid more depending on what I decide to fill my belly with? If I eat just a $20 salad, then a 20% tip would be $4. However, at the same restaurant, if I eat just the $80 lobster, then the waitress should expect, at minimum, according to you guys, a $16 tip. Literally the same actions... taking my order, relaying it to the back, bringing my one plate of food to the table and then bringing me the bill at the end, checking in on me in the middle. One waitress should get 4 times more money from me depending on how hungry I was? That's ridiculous, and some of you guys in this thread have just bought into it without giving it much thought. 

(I was incorrect in describing the restaurant as upscale in my earlier post. We only eat out a handful of times a year, so not totally familiar with descriptors. Their website says it's a "refined, traditional steakhouse experience")

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4 hours ago, Swiftian said:

You failed at not coming across as a jerk, OSJ.

I still don't understand why the tip is based on the price of the food and there wasn't a satisfactory explanation in there. Why does someone get paid more depending on what I decide to fill my belly with? If I eat just a $20 salad, then a 20% tip would be $4. However, at the same restaurant, if I eat just the $80 lobster, then the waitress should expect, at minimum, according to you guys, a $16 tip. Literally the same actions... taking my order, relaying it to the back, bringing my one plate of food to the table and then bringing me the bill at the end, checking in on me in the middle. One waitress should get 4 times more money from me depending on how hungry I was? That's ridiculous, and some of you guys in this thread have just bought into it without giving it much thought. 

(I was incorrect in describing the restaurant as upscale in my earlier post. We only eat out a handful of times a year, so not totally familiar with descriptors. Their website says it's a "refined, traditional steakhouse experience")

While maybe not related to your question I did look up why we tip in the first place.  A quick search pointed to this article which explains the in their word troubling history of tipping.  https://time.com/5404475/history-tipping-american-restaurants-civil-war/

But to your point I found a possible answer online:

Quote

There are two reasons tipping at restaurants is percentage based:

It is generally assumed the higher the total amount of the check, the more service was required to deliver the goods for which that amount paid. Since the server was working harder, they should earn more. In this case, basing the tip on a percentage rewards the server appropriately for the amount of service rendered.

For high-end restaurants, tips are still percentage-based because servers at high-end restaurants are usually better trained and they also have to split the tip with more people. So just like you are paying more for the food because (one would hope) it is better or at least the atmosphere warrants it, you pay more for the service because it too is better.

I personally would prefer servers get a flat rate instead of relying on tips.  There was a restaurant that did that I think in Seattle and it made the news like it was a novel concept.  But to me a flat rate makes sense.  That said I generally tip 20% but it could be more or less depending on how good/bad the service was.  I used to tip nothing for piss-poor service but have been guilted over the years into tipping at least something.

Edited by NikoBaltimore
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On 12/29/2019 at 12:15 PM, Swiftian said:

I was going to create a thread on tipping but there's already one so might as well just bump.

I'm surprised to see so many people say their standard restaurant tip is 20%. Mine is 15% and I consider that to be close to my top end. Probably 18% would be the highest I would ever go. Am I cheap? Of course, I'm not from NA so have had to get used to this silly system over the years. I don't agree with it but I do always tip regardless (I don't think I've ever had a terrible enough experience to warrant giving nothing)

The reason I've brought this back up is because I'm a little sore over the tip I left last night. It was a special occasion so we went out for a family dinner at an upscale restaurant. There was 5 of us and the total came to $275. Without thinking about it I plugged 15% into the machine to give a $40 tip. The waitress could've been a bit friendlier but otherwise no complaints about the service. However, the $40 was more than any of our individual meals cost (excluding appetizers, drinks, desserts) so I essentially paid for six mains for five people.

My question is why is the tip commensurate with the price of the food? The waitress didn't work any harder than a waitress at, say, a Denny's. In fact, the latter probably works harder given how busy breakfast places can be. Yet one gets a $40 tip and one gets a $15 tip. Do high end restaurants pay their staff less on the understanding that they'll get higher tips?

@NikoBaltimore covered most of this with the quoted reasoning, but I thought I'd go a step further in that vein.  Let's use your Denny's example.  If you're eating a Denny's, are you ordering an appetizer before your meal?  Dessert?  It's certainly possible and available, but I think for most in a fast casual type establishment like that you're ordering a Grand Slam breakfast or a sandwich and fries and that's it.  You're also ordering a cup of coffee or a Coke or something of that ilk, things the server will refill on their own.  How many trips to your table is the server at Denny's making?  Initial greeting and drink order, bring the drinks take your food order, deliver food, check on food/refill drink, drop off check.  That's five trips on average, give or take a trip or two if you're a regular/in hurry or you're talking after finishing your meal and having an extra cup of coffee, etc.  In the upscale restaurant(and yes, the "refined steakhouse experience" is going to qualify as upscale, it's not top tier or anything but a clear step up from Outback and Texas Roadhouse I'd be willing to bet) example you've ordered appetizers and desserts, and if drinks means mixed drinks or beer and anyone had more than one we're talking multiple trips to table, POS system, bar, and back to the table for each round, plus extra trips is anyone had coffee with their dessert/after dinner(or maybe a second cup?).  You've easily doubled the number of trips your server is making to the table and in most restaurants of that level the server is at minimum tipping out a bartender but quite possibly also a bar back and a busser(or multiples of each of those positions, though the rate would probably be a bit lower then).  A server at Denny's isn't tipping anyone out most likely, what they get goes in their pocket...unless they are required to report some or all of their tips as income and get taxed on them, but that's another issue.  So even if the quality of the service was equal at Denny's and the steakhouse,  your server at the steakhouse probably made twice as many trips to your table and had to tip out a bartender and possibly more people, so they do deserve more of a tip to begin with.  The percentage based system might not be perfect but it's easy to figure and be consistent with.  The only other thing I'd say is that having a range of just 15% to 18% doesn't allow much room for above average or better service.  Even on a $300 tab, a 3% increase in tip is only $9 so if a server goes above and beyond and delivers excellent service you're not allowing yourself much wiggle room if you're sticking to that range.

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6 hours ago, Swiftian said:

You failed at not coming across as a jerk, OSJ.

I still don't understand why the tip is based on the price of the food and there wasn't a satisfactory explanation in there. Why does someone get paid more depending on what I decide to fill my belly with? If I eat just a $20 salad, then a 20% tip would be $4. However, at the same restaurant, if I eat just the $80 lobster, then the waitress should expect, at minimum, according to you guys, a $16 tip. Literally the same actions... taking my order, relaying it to the back, bringing my one plate of food to the table and then bringing me the bill at the end, checking in on me in the middle. One waitress should get 4 times more money from me depending on how hungry I was? That's ridiculous, and some of you guys in this thread have just bought into it without giving it much thought. 

(I was incorrect in describing the restaurant as upscale in my earlier post. We only eat out a handful of times a year, so not totally familiar with descriptors. Their website says it's a "refined, traditional steakhouse experience")

*sighs* Let me try again... Chances are pretty good that any place with a $20 salad has $60-$100 entrees. Maybe you aren't hungry and only want the salad, okay, fine that makes sense. However, you are still taking up the most valuable thing that a restaurant has to offer which is seating space and the time and trouble of the kitchen and waitstaff. If you can't at laest toss a $5 bill in there you are being a cheap bastard and will likely get some "extras" in your food should you visit the place again.

BTW:: For the $80 lobster dinner I'm rounding the bill up to $100

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One last shot at this and then I tap out... I fully understand that the tipping thing is primarily a North American institution and seems weird to those not from here. I totally get that. On the other hand, I was raised by the adage of "when in Rome, do as the Romans do!" Yes, there's lots about tipping that doesn't make sense, I tip the guy that mows my lawn yet I would never think of tipping my dentist (he makes a shit-ton more money than I do anyway). Yeah, it doesn't make a great deal of sense, but as long as restaurant employees in the front of the house are paid as THOUGH THEY GET TIPS, it seems only appropriate to play ball. 

FWIW: (And granted we're in a small town, where people are recognized), when we go out we get seated right away, whether it's our turn or not, and get treated pretty much like local royalty. Why? Not only have I made it a point to get to know waitstaff by name and the owners of the places we go, I tip well. If there's a problem, I'm gracious about it and never a prick. I've had pretty much every job that there is to have in the restaurant industry when I was younger and being nice and tipping well goes a long way to ensure that your dining experience will be a pleasant one. Treat others the way that you would like to be treated if the situation was reversed. 

Here's a quick list of things NOT to do when dining out:

1. Unless you actually speak French, do not try and impress anyone by ordering in French, you will sound like a moron and let everyone working there know that you are a goof who should not be taken seriously. I once heard this yo-yo call the waiter "Gargoyle!" I'm sure he meant "garcon" as there wasn't anything particularly grotesque about the waiter, but I suspect that the idiot probably got some "extras" with his dinner.

2. Snapping your fingers or waving your arms around like a demented windmill is pretty much frowned upon unless you are at a ballgame.

3. If your server introduces his/herself by name it's because they expect you to address them by name. "Hey you!" is just about as bad as the finger snapping bit. 

4. If you're going to be a cheap bastard like Swiftian, may I suggest that Taco Bell has a delightful carryout service.

5. Quietly raising a finger and a soft "Excuse me!"" Will go a long way to ensure that you get taken care of properly. A good waitstaff is trained to watch and listen for such cues, I can hear a customer whisper in a crowded bar, it goes with the training. I'm also (to this day) pretty adept at spotting when someone's drink is half-empty. 

6. If there's a wine list, peruse it. If you don't know shit about wine, ask the waiter what he suggests to go with your order, ask for a couple or three recs and choose the one in the middle price-wise. If you don't drink (which we don't ) ask what they have by way of non-alcoholic wines. This will show that you have a palate and are not a cheap bastard. 

7. If you can't afford to tip in accordance with the price of the meal (at the very least) stay the fuck home. 

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Guest Stefanie Without Stefanie
3 hours ago, gatling said:

@NikoBaltimore covered most of this with the quoted reasoning, but I thought I'd go a step further in that vein.  Let's use your Denny's example.  If you're eating a Denny's, are you ordering an appetizer before your meal?  Dessert?  It's certainly possible and available, but I think for most in a fast casual type establishment like that you're ordering a Grand Slam breakfast or a sandwich and fries and that's it.  You're also ordering a cup of coffee or a Coke or something of that ilk, things the server will refill on their own.  How many trips to your table is the server at Denny's making?  Initial greeting and drink order, bring the drinks take your food order, deliver food, check on food/refill drink, drop off check.  That's five trips on average, give or take a trip or two if you're a regular/in hurry or you're talking after finishing your meal and having an extra cup of coffee, etc.  In the upscale restaurant(and yes, the "refined steakhouse experience" is going to qualify as upscale, it's not top tier or anything but a clear step up from Outback and Texas Roadhouse I'd be willing to bet) example you've ordered appetizers and desserts, and if drinks means mixed drinks or beer and anyone had more than one we're talking multiple trips to table, POS system, bar, and back to the table for each round, plus extra trips is anyone had coffee with their dessert/after dinner(or maybe a second cup?).  You've easily doubled the number of trips your server is making to the table and in most restaurants of that level the server is at minimum tipping out a bartender but quite possibly also a bar back and a busser(or multiples of each of those positions, though the rate would probably be a bit lower then).  A server at Denny's isn't tipping anyone out most likely, what they get goes in their pocket...unless they are required to report some or all of their tips as income and get taxed on them, but that's another issue.  So even if the quality of the service was equal at Denny's and the steakhouse,  your server at the steakhouse probably made twice as many trips to your table and had to tip out a bartender and possibly more people, so they do deserve more of a tip to begin with.  The percentage based system might not be perfect but it's easy to figure and be consistent with.  The only other thing I'd say is that having a range of just 15% to 18% doesn't allow much room for above average or better service.  Even on a $300 tab, a 3% increase in tip is only $9 so if a server goes above and beyond and delivers excellent service you're not allowing yourself much wiggle room if you're sticking to that range.

Higher-end restaurants also don't give larger sections as well, specifically because of the care you mentioned. I waited tables in my early-20s at an upscale seafood restaurant where I only had a section larger than three tables if someone called out sick, because of the amount of care and attention needed to be provided to each table. I also waited tables at a pizza restaurant where my section was usually eight to ten tables.

If I had full sections every night, I made more money at the pizza place. Problem is, I only would get full sections on the weekends there, so overall I made more money at the seafood restaurant. I always had full sections at the seafood restaurant because the sections were so small and the restaurant was always booked up.

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1 hour ago, Stefanie the Human said:

Higher-end restaurants also don't give larger sections as well, specifically because of the care you mentioned. I waited tables in my early-20s at an upscale seafood restaurant where I only had a section larger than three tables if someone called out sick, because of the amount of care and attention needed to be provided to each table. I also waited tables at a pizza restaurant where my section was usually eight to ten tables.

If I had full sections every night, I made more money at the pizza place. Problem is, I only would get full sections on the weekends there, so overall I made more money at the seafood restaurant. I always had full sections at the seafood restaurant because the sections were so small and the restaurant was always booked up.

Another salient point is that customers at the seafood place knew that they were going to a nice place and prepared to spend accordingly. Folks going to the pizza place were looking to grab some grub on the way home.  When I tended bar in a neighborhood joint I did more in tips (by far) than I earned hourly. When I tended bar in a college joint, despite it being packed most evenings the tips sucked and I had to split with the waitstaff and bussers. College kids are the fucking worst, demanding and cheap bastards on top of that. Like I said, if you can't afford to take care of your server, stay the fuck home. Your very presence is costing your server money.

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