piranesi Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 Guys, I could use a little help here. I feel like I can trust you guys on whether I need to get help. Did I dream amd/or hallucinate that Kane showed up on t.v. for like 20 seconds to chokeslam Jake "The Milkman" Millman, but it wasn't Jake "The Milkman" Millman, but a black guy in his underwear and then they both disappeared and no one noticed and then I had to do my junior year recitation but I was naked and didn't have a face? That didn't happen, right? Like, if they needed to fill 3 1/2 minutes they could have told Dean and Corbin to go a little longer rather than introduce a whole weird guy who is/is not Jake "The Milkman" Millman in a suit and have him strip to crickets and then tell Kane to get in costume and do the pyro and all that, right? And if they did that they would at least ackowledge that it happened rather than using it as some sort of big data test of whether or not we're all still awake? So it didn't "happen" because that would be madness. Yet I have clear memories of it "happening." So, guys, what's happening to me? 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirSmUgly Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 Jake Milliman had a kayfabe son who is apparently as bad at wrestling as dear old pops! If he fought Kane in over a turkey in an empty room, I know home turf advantage would help him win. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HumanChessgame Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 I'd rather see some random jamoke strip to his skivvies every week than Kane being a regular. Holy shit did Ziggler ever burn the hell out of Miz. Shame he's probably going to loose the title match at the ppv. Rhyno eating cheeze wiz in Heath Slater's trailer needs to be a regular thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zev Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 If they ever do a Team Challenge Series for RAW versus SD versus NXT, I think that any son, real or kayfabe of the Milkman would be the odds on favorite to win the end battle royal. Well, at least get to the final 4. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sammo~! Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 AJ Styles wearing Cena's arm band like he's a 1970s tennis star is The. Best. 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
piranesi Posted August 31, 2016 Author Share Posted August 31, 2016 4 minutes ago, HumanChessgame said: I'd rather see some random jamoke strip to his skivvies every week than Kane being a regular. Well you get both, my friend. You get both. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sammo~! Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 Those sure were The Headbangers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hammerva Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 Rhyno being the Kane to Daniel Bryan in 2016 is fine with me. As someone mentioned elsewhere, Renee Young showed her lack of respect for the lower middle class in that interview. Oh sure it is fine when you date Dean Ambrose cause you are mad at daddy but heaven forbid someone wife belches near you. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sammo~! Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 I don't know if you've ever smelled an EZ Cheese burp, but I feel ya Renee. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
piranesi Posted August 31, 2016 Author Share Posted August 31, 2016 By the look of that MRSA on AJ Styles' arm, he may be a lot shorter by Backlash. Maybe Punk has some unused ZPacks? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlie M. Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 The Headbangers managed to injure both Slater and Rhyno in a 2 minute match. I guess we'll never see them again. Thankfully. Following up Miz/Bryan with Ziggler is pretty weak UNLESS it's just to give Miz a win and they're doing a slow burn on this. I thought Orton cut a good promo to counteract Bray's usual nonsense. An AJ/Orton program seems inevitable and it'll probably be damn good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
piranesi Posted August 31, 2016 Author Share Posted August 31, 2016 Guys, we're sleeping on the real question here. Spoiler Who's Roscoe? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
piranesi Posted August 31, 2016 Author Share Posted August 31, 2016 Just now, Charlie M. said: Following up Miz/Bryan with Ziggler is pretty weak UNLESS it's just to give Miz a win and they're doing a slow burn on this. Dolph Ziggler makes everything shooty suddenly seem, like, "extra worked" if that makes sense. That goes for: - feuds - moves - finishes - hair - denim Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evilwaldo Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 13 minutes ago, hammerva said: Rhyno being the Kane to Daniel Bryan in 2016 is fine with me. As someone mentioned elsewhere, Renee Young showed her lack of respect for the lower middle class in that interview. Oh sure it is fine when you date Dean Ambrose cause you are mad at daddy but heaven forbid someone wife belches near you. When does she show up without makeup, ratted hair, chrewing bubblegum, leggings two sizes too small, and a ripped Motley Crue t-shirt? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
piranesi Posted August 31, 2016 Author Share Posted August 31, 2016 Over on twitter I think between the DVDVR account and myself we have worked out a treatment for the WWE Films reboot of RAISING ARIZONA: Heath Slater and Beulah kidnap Hornswoggle causing VInce McMahon to realize how much he actually loves the little bastard. Vince hires grotesque bounty hunter Braun Strowman to get him back. Meanwhile Heath's buddy Rhino, staying at Heath's trailer, realizes what happened and next thing you know Rhino and The Sandman grab little Swoggle and drive off into the hills of West Virginia. This leads to an odyssey of self discovery for Heath as he heads out to do battle with all of them while still trying to get a goddamn job since he was fired from his last one after trying to get his general manager and his wife, Brie, to swing with Heath and DotBeulah. 10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Green Meanie Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 Once again, Slater is the MVP of the entire company. I knew where they were going with the whole "Slater living in a trailer" bit but was surprised they didn't make his wife uglier. Bummed we didn't get to see any of the kids or the ABOVE GROUND POOL. Who is Roscoe? Is the pool okay?! We demand answers! I was happy to see The Headbangers back, even if it was just to lose to Heath/Rhyno. That was not their intro music. Did they get signed just for the match or a contract? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Green Meanie Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 Also, way to cut the legs out from under Miz already. They could have done so much with this angle, but instead pretty much just used it as another "LOOK AT ME, I'M A GOOD GUY" for Ziggler. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
piranesi Posted August 31, 2016 Author Share Posted August 31, 2016 The funny thing is that the basic lifestyle implied in that sketch is identical to the one Matt and Jeff Hardy live but they just do it in and around a nonsensically palatial estate. HEATH KEEPS IS REAL! HE CAN HEAT THAT WHOLE DAMN THING WITH ONE COOLER FIRE! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nice Guy Eddie Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 28 minutes ago, Sammo~! said: I don't know if you've ever smelled an EZ Cheese burp, but I feel ya Renee. I'm sure she's smelled worse dating Dean Ambrose. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beech27 Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 So, I've never actually seen the Headbangers before. My only takeaway is this: Why the name, and "heavy metal" catch phrase, when their look and dancing borrow from the hardcore--not metal--scene? I'm just positive lots of people have been worrying about this for ages, but now I'm stuck. Other things: Styles made Crews look really good, in not much time. Ambrose really couldn't do the same with Corbin. I really admire how committed to #beatingupjohncenasgirlfriend Carmella is. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
piranesi Posted August 31, 2016 Author Share Posted August 31, 2016 Just now, Nice Guy Eddie said: I'm sure she's smelled worse dating Dean Ambrose. Most of Dean's "gatherings" are in open air structures, like open boxcars or tents made out of leaves and string, or just hanging out under a delivery truck. Ventilation is not among the problems that arise. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wyld Samurai Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 1 minute ago, Beech27 said: So, I've never actually seen the Headbangers before. My only takeaway is this: Why the name, and "heavy metal" catch phrase, when their look and dancing borrow from the hardcore--not metal--scene? I'm just positive lots of people have been worrying about this for ages, but now I'm stuck. Other things: Styles made Crews look really good, in not much time. Ambrose really couldn't do the same with Corbin. I really admire how committed to #beatingupjohncenasgirlfriend Carmella is. The Headbangers were not your classic metal heads. Theif gimmick came from the nu-goth metal that was Manson where it became a androgynous. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Burgundy LaRue Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 I'm now imagining Ambrose siphoning gas for a 1974 school bus that he drives for the local alternative school, using his mouth as the siphon pump--and eating the mint from the cafeteria lady BEFORE the deed. In other words, Dean Ambrose = WWE's Otto. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
piranesi Posted August 31, 2016 Author Share Posted August 31, 2016 Countdown to Nicki Bella turning on Becky: ....C:/COMMAND/INITIATE Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zev Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 Slater's above ground pool is just a dilapidated boat turned upside down? 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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