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The Hardys Not Really Dumpster Fire But Kinda Sad But Kinda Awesome Thread


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4 minutes ago, jstout said:

OK, own up, Piranesi - someone put you in charge of booking TNA. We won't tell anyone your secret.

It'd be the best move TNA ever made. What would really make this feud great is if evertything to do with it got the MST3K/Rifftrax treatment. 

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3 hours ago, joseph2112 said:

The thing about Jeff though is he always had some sort of charisma that I'm not sure can be explained, but the dude was way over and sold a ton of merch. Hence the rumors of WWE wanting him back even though he was on like strike 5 or something.

It's kind of like that song you liked as a kid that was about colours and stuff and then you grow up and realize the guy who wrote it was just high as hell. That's Jeff Hardy.

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44 minutes ago, jstout said:

OK, own up, Piranesi - someone put you in charge of booking TNA. We won't tell anyone your secret.

If Piranesi had the book, the kid from Just One of the Guys would be the the ace right now. 

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46 minutes ago, (BP) said:

If Piranesi had the book, the kid from Just One of the Guys would be the the ace right now. 

 

Are you telling me that you don't mark out when Rick Morehouse stands up and cuts a promo on Greg Tolan's tiny pecker and books a death match for the big dance while shitting on his gimmick?

 

 

It's a Rock-level burial of a heel.

 

 

 

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20 hours ago, RolandTHTG said:

Next TNA PPV you main event with a Hardy Invitational that can be won by any member of the Hardy family, which is basically those two, Reby Sky, Barry Hardy, Shannon Moore. Two guys doing a Laurel and Hardy tribute, and then bam, swerve! The baby somehow wins the title. Who's side is the baby on? Why is he here? Who knows - hasn't said a word since they've been on TV. Attempts by other TNA talent to take the title like candy from a baby (which is also a new storyline, as due to budget restrictions, the title belt is replaced by a chocolate replica) are all stopped by the baby's new bodyguard, Babyloving Snitsky. 

Slowly seeds are planted for the baby's heel turn, as he's barred by the state athletic commission from defending his chocolatey title due to not being old enough to walk, whilst vignettes of fifteen year old Matt and Jeff squash matches are shown in contrast.

To taunt his father, the baby brings in Lita as his new valet. To save on script writers, they basically just do whatever Brad, Ned and Lauren are doing on Neighbours that week.

Baby loses the title on the final episode of Impact after Lita turns on him for her original true love...El Dandy.

The show ends with Bret Hart coming out on the ramp during his victory celebration with a knowing nod. Who were we to doubt El Dandy?

The French judge would have given this a 10 if you could have worked in Lita being slapped in the face by CW Anderson's cock. 

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People don't understand that "professional wrestling" is an art. And much like ANY art, there are endless ways to express it. It can LITERALLY be anything the performeres in the ring or in the Hardy Family Compound want it to be. If two guys want to go out there and use light tubes and light each other on fire, that is their way of expressing their style of wrestling. If they want to go out there and go hold for hold and keep it mat based, then that is their way of expressing their style of wrestling. If two guys want to go out and put each other through grandma's dinner table and toss around a doll that looks like one of the wrestler's babies, then that is their way of expressing their style of wrestling. Although you may not agree or like a certain style does not mean that it isn't wrestling. Did it used to be a certain way?? Yeah. But just like anything it changed, it evolved.

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1 hour ago, piranesi said:

 

Are you telling me that you don't mark out when Rick Morehouse stands up and cuts a promo on Greg Tolan's tiny pecker and books a death match for the big dance while shitting on his gimmick?

 

 

It's a Rock-level burial of a heel.

 

 

 

But the heel was the biggest money drawer in the film!

 

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I could spit on a keyboard and take a picture of it and call it art. It would be art. That's great. It's not very useful for comparative analysis or discussion. 

You could value it more than a Turner painting, but you're probably an asshole if you do.

"Everything is art!" is a shitty jumping on point for discussion.

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Meltzer just made a comment recently that between the Hardys and Trevor Lee - Cameron, NC might be the best wrestling city per capita (I think Cameron might have a pop of 1000)

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29 minutes ago, Marty Sugar said:

People don't understand that "professional wrestling" is an art. And much like ANY art, there are endless ways to express it. It can LITERALLY be anything the performeres in the ring or in the Hardy Family Compound want it to be. If two guys want to go out there and use light tubes and light each other on fire, that is their way of expressing their style of wrestling. If they want to go out there and go hold for hold and keep it mat based, then that is their way of expressing their style of wrestling. If two guys want to go out and put each other through grandma's dinner table and toss around a doll that looks like one of the wrestler's babies, then that is their way of expressing their style of wrestling. Although you may not agree or like a certain style does not mean that it isn't wrestling. Did it used to be a certain way?? Yeah. But just like anything it changed, it evolved.

That's all well and good, and it especially applies to the Ricochet/Osprey match.  But this was an angle to setup a match.  The match itself will likely be fine, maybe more than fine.  But in no way is this something that will add to the "art" of the match.  If anything, it detracts from the interest in the match.  I might have had a passing interest were it not for this, now I just don't care who wins.

How about the videos WCW did with Sting, Vader, and Cheatum?  The ones where they're on a beach and it's so bad it's good.  Did that add to the "art" of the match?  To me, not really.  It was a fun match, but I don't remember a damn thing about it.  All I remember is the video, and same will be said for the Matt/Jeff video.

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