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[MOVIE] MARCH 2016 DISCUSSION

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TODAY! will be the day I finally watch Mad Max.... maybe

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Looks like Dark Tower is officially on. Idris Elba, Matthew McCounaghey and Stephen King have all tweeted teasers

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That's going to be a disaster. Kinda reminds me of the development process on THE LONE RANGER, where it took forever because everybody, in their heart of hearts, knew they really shouldn't be making it, but the scent of fresh IP was just too much for them to give up.

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Well Lone Ranger was doomed no matter what.

 

I mean Depp insisting on being Tonto ruined the version that we saw. But even before that - they had had changed Tonto to be the Lone Ranger's love interest.

 

And that isn't even touching on the supposed werewolves rumor.

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And then he was going to fight the giant mechanical spi... Oh, wrong movie.

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And then he was going to fight the giant mechanical spi... Oh, wrong movie.

Not too far off though, with regards to shittiness.

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Yeah, I didn't read the series, but my understanding is that there comes a big spider of some significance.

Jon Peters would approve.

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I actually liked 'The Lone Ranger'.  I was basically hoping for 'Pirates of the Caribbean' in the old west, which is essentially what I got.

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I actually liked 'The Lone Ranger'.  I was basically hoping for 'Pirates of the Caribbean' in the old west, which is essentially what I got.

 

I never saw it, but there were quite a few apologist "in defense of" op-eds about it at the end of the year.

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Even if you can ignore the racism, the lots and lots of racism, it was just too damn long. There is a fun hour and a half western action movie in there, unfortunately it is *2 and a half* hours long. There was not nearly enough material or weight to justify that shit. If that movie actually had fans, someone could probably do a decent fan edit of it.

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Lone Ranger was okay.

 

Look, I have a problem. Girlfriend wants to see Dirty Grandpa. I'm thinking it may scar me for life. Has anybody here seen it and lived to tell the tale?

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Lone Ranger was okay.

 

Look, I have a problem. Girlfriend wants to see Dirty Grandpa. I'm thinking it may scar me for life. Has anybody here seen it and lived to tell the tale?

Haven't seen it but the only reasonably compelling reason I could fathom for myself seeing it is based off of Glenn Kenny's review for RogerEbert.com (He wasn't even able to give it half a star, just a thumbs down):

 

Weirdly enough, the final scene with Plaza and De Niro in the latter character’s apartment does contain some rather good one-liners, which I have to assume were concocted by Plaza in an improv situation, as their verbal wit is so manifestly superior to any other spoken joke in the movie that the contrast is, again, embarrassing.

http://www.rogerebert.com/reviews/dirty-grandpa-2016

So it sounds like that scene might not be...bad?

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Last night I finally caught True Grit, and I'm kicking myself for taking six damn years to see it. It's fantastic. Could've won any of the nominations it had for the Oscars and didn't which is a crime. Above all Hailee Steinfeld and the brilliant dialogue stand out. Certainly in the top five of Coen films, maybe in the top three.

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This is the End: Yeah, I tend to fluctuate between thinking Rogen/Franco are a great comedy duo...and thinking it's mostly just that they tell us they're a great comedy duo.

 

A lot of their interaction falls flat...but then you get the odd, rare glimpses of genius.

 

The Interview was quite similar.  

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Last night I finally caught True Grit, and I'm kicking myself for taking six damn years to see it. It's fantastic. Could've won any of the nominations it had for the Oscars and didn't which is a crime. Above all Hailee Steinfeld and the brilliant dialogue stand out. Certainly in the top five of Coen films, maybe in the top three.

 

The best child performance in a film ever?

 

It's down to her and the kid from The Babadook, anyway.

 

I mean, this isn't "The innocent eyes of a child show us the world!" Spielberg-type cheesiness.

 

There's something genuinely a bit off and weird, but still sympathetic, about them.  

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The best child performance in a film ever?

 

 

Whoa whoa hyperbole.  She's a contender for like best this decade, but Room and Beasts of the Southern Wild come to mind too.  Maybe the oldest boy in The Witch as a fringe pick.

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The boy in Beasts of No Nation was really good as well. Keep in mind, a majority of that movie is viewed through his POV.

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Anna Paquin, the girl in Whale Rider, shirley temple, ...

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Danielle Harris in Halloween IV as Jamie Lloyd.

And I really and honestly mean that. It's a spectacular performance.

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shirley temple, ...

 

Really? Isn't she the go-to performance when we think of phony, obnoxious, annoying child acting?

 

You know they originally wanted to put her in The Wizard of Oz.

 

And there's a reason we're all grateful they didn't. 

 

(Judy Garland was, like, 17 or 18 when she did that film, so I never considered that a child performance. But, yes, otherwise, she's amazingly good.)

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I accidentally watched Universal Soldier: Regeneration and A Good Day to Die Hard back to back. If you've got an 80s/ 90s action franchise that's flagging, don't set the next one in Russia and have the climax at Chernobyl. Because although that might sound like a good idea, it clearly isn't one, because both of these movies were rubbish.

 

Andrei Arlovski is slightly less uncharismatic on camera than Jai Courtney. Although he's basically playing an automata. Courtney is supposed to come across like a young version of Bruce Willis, and he just doesn't. At all. It seems all of his Spartacus charisma was in his hair. But basically, two bad movies and I don't know why I watched either, let alone both.

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I thought the girl in Tommorrowland was fantastic, even if not quite on the level we are talking about.  Hailee Steinfeld was fourteen, so for all purposes, Judy Garland at 16 for Wizard of Oz is bit older,  but the academy still gave her a juvenile oscar for that and Babes in Arms(yes I had to look it up). Still I think the all time one has to be Jodie Foster is Taxi Driver right? 

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Christina Ricci in the Addams Family Values (no clue of her age at the time) was impressive too. 

 

Everything she did in that film was comedic gold. Literally, everything.

 

*Pugsely semi-accidentally shoots and murders an American bald eagle during casual archery practice*

 

Horrified adult: "It's an American bald eagle!" 

 

Horrified adult #2: "But aren't they extinct?!?"

 

Smirking Wednesday: "Well, they are now." 

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Christina Ricci in the Addams Family Values (no clue of her age at the time) was impressive too. 

 

Everything she did in that film was comedic gold. Literally, everything.

 

*Pugsely semi-accidentally shoots and murders an American bald eagle during casual archery practice*

 

Horrified adult: "It's an American bald eagle!" 

 

Horrified adult #2: "But aren't they extinct?!?"

 

Smirking Wednesday: "Well, they are now." 

That play scene is tremendous, with the smile as she lights the match. And the creepy fake one when she's released from that house in the woods after watching the sound of music and Disney movies. . . 

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