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MARCH 2016 - WRESTLING DISCUSSION


RIPPA

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I never wrestled with any of my friends, but I had a 4 foot tall stuffed animal Dog (Sandy the Dog) that I would do moves on all the time as a little kid.

 

Would throw all the couch cushions on the ground and perform top rope moves from the arm of the couch on that poor stuffed animal all night long after my Mom went to bed.

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I was in a straight up trampoline fed in jr. high. We were all about work rate...and fucked up high angle suplexes that SHOULD have crippled any one of us because hey....WRESTLING!

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I had this big ass Cookie Monster stuffed animal I would wrestle, and it took great bumps. The only problem was his eyes. He has these giant plastic eyes that would bust your mouth if you landed wrong on a splash or powerbombed him with too much vigor.

My Macho King wrestling buddy (which I still have) was much more cooperative, but was like a third of the size.

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I once won a fight with the Texas Cloverleaf- which I thought was the scorpion back then, but I ended up doing a Cloverleaf instead.

 

I don't remember it, but apparently I tried to do a figure 4 during a barfight, but I couldn't do it.  Maybe I should have borrowed Disco's notes.

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My personal claim to fame is knowing how to make the figure 4 actually hurt (put the crossed leg above the knee cap)

 

When I was about 10, I thought wrestlers were stupid for doing the convoluted figure four when (as I discovered on my younger brother) the Nagata Lock was much easier to apply and yielded a significantly higher tapout rate.

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I had a friend do the "fake handshake and then punch your opponent" thing during a fight. He and a guy got into it at a party and then sort of called a truce. My friend put his hand out and when the other guy went to shake, my buddy clocked him. My friend was kind of an asshole when he drank.

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I powerbombed a three-foot tall stuffed Mickey Mouse onto a collapsible toy activity table in a Disney Store in Knoxville TN.

Its head fell off.

Chants of "Holy shit!" from the customer base could not be confirmed.

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I powerbombed a three-foot tall stuffed Mickey Mouse onto a collapsible toy activity table in a Disney Store in Knoxville TN.

Its head fell off.

Chants of "Holy shit!" from the customer base could not be confirmed.

 

"You fucked up! You fucked up! You fucked up!"

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I've got a friend who runs a record label, and a year or so ago I was at a festival helping him with some stuff backstage. Suddenly, he called me over to help repair a ricketty looking decorating table he'd been using to sell merch on. I'd barely had time to tell him it was just about fixed when he told the drummer from one of his bands to run at him, and gave him a straight-up Arn Anderson spinebuster through the table.

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We had a big couch in the basement were I could shoot myself into the corner where the armrest meets the rest of the couch and do the "Flair flip" spot, where he flips up the turnbuckles and lands on his feet on the apron. My mom saw me do it once and was convinced I was somewhere on "the spectrum" because of how perfectly I could do a lot of spots. Sometimes I'd let my sister pop up and clothesline me from the other side of the couch after I flipped. Also, I've been doing Krav Maga for about 6 yrs. now, and I've ended more than one sparring session with a Texas Cloverleaf. 

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I got into a fight with a kid when I was maybe 12 and tried to DDT him on the sidewalk.  It didn't really work and became a half-ass front facelock takedown.  So I just kept him in the facelock and punched him in the side a bunch of times.  So yeah, the DDT doesn't work if the other guy isn't cooperating.

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I got into a fight with a kid when I was maybe 12 and tried to DDT him on the sidewalk.  It didn't really work and became a half-ass front facelock takedown.  So I just kept him in the facelock and punched him in the side a bunch of times.  So yeah, the DDT doesn't work if the other guy isn't cooperating.

 

Not true, a friend of mine ddt'ed another friend of mine once when we were kids and a lot of tears were spilled that day.

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Changing tack, this WrestleMania is the first time for me where I've realised the name is now the draw and not the matches

They better hope so. Not that it doesn't have the potential to be fun, but this is one of the most underwhelming cards in recent Manias. I'm trying to think if there was weaker one since I got back into WWE a few years ago and I got nothing:

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I've got a friend who runs a record label, and a year or so ago I was at a festival helping him with some stuff backstage. Suddenly, he called me over to help repair a ricketty looking decorating table he'd been using to sell merch on. I'd barely had time to tell him it was just about fixed when he told the drummer from one of his bands to run at him, and gave him a straight-up Arn Anderson spinebuster through the table.

I hope someone caught it on video. The band didn't happen to be Eat the Turnbuckle, did it?

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I got into a fight with a kid when I was maybe 12 and tried to DDT him on the sidewalk.  It didn't really work and became a half-ass front facelock takedown.  So I just kept him in the facelock and punched him in the side a bunch of times.  So yeah, the DDT doesn't work if the other guy isn't cooperating.

 

Not true, a friend of mine ddt'ed another friend of mine once when we were kids and a lot of tears were spilled that day.

 

 

LOL so clearly my one try wasn't an adequate sample and I should have tried DDT'ing dudes a few more times.

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