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I haven't done my own crate work in ages, simply because it stinks out loud. But I'll help friends. One I always hated (not as much as the Post Op drop offs), was where you've gotta land a Cuban (?) on this narrow strip of land in the valley, while getting shot at. 

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...what do you think? 

He had actually called me from the in-game phone prior to that. I was in a one-sided sniper battle from my camping spot. I thought maybe it was by accident. Then I got that text. 

I had forgotten about the phone until then. I used to use it against people in jets to distract them when they're doing an strafe or being annoying. That and during ground combat. It works. 

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I was actually going to do the phone thing to a jet griefer, but he wrecked before I could. Seems like a really good idea, though.

Think I'm putting car chasing on the backburner in favor of Freemode hijinx. Can't describe how tired I am of those marksman, do-not-miss NPCs. I took Roast's advice and tried to kill them all before delivering the car. Used about 5 body armors and still died 4 times. Delivered the car fine, but that was a lot of aggravation.

And those way-off car stealings where you're lucky to come in with under $20,000 on damage can get bent, too.

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Freeroam is where it's at. I kind of took off the past couple of weeks to focus on car stuff. However this past week has turned me into a psychopath again, rekindling my love for murder and pissing people off. 

Nothing better than beating people up, seeing all of them chirping on the mic, and switching from party to in-game chat to listen to them rage. Destroying cargo, cars, luring them to Petrol Point at the construction site next to Maze.

Such a lovely game. 

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There's a lot more opportunities for entertainment - if I don't feel like getting into scraps with people, I can see if a Level 3 wants to drive the rocket car, or I can get into a car with a mysterious honking stranger, or - and I don't know why I've found this entertaining before - I can call in a tank, go into passive and ride around high-traffic battle zones while 200 cops trail behind me. "It's a tank. And he's in passive. WHY IS THE GUY IN A TANK IN PASSIVE?"

And that's without even getting the headset out and seeing if someone's asking for it in game chat.

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Iffin my ass can stay awake imma try to get on later tonight. Been to long. Last time I was on it was me and stout. Went into freemode and lost party chat. 

Oh and on a side note I pre-ordered that andromeda game the other day. Hopefully i can remember to pick the dalm thing up. 

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It said my party had started another session, and would I like to join? I thought "OK, Melraz is in this party again and wants to do something else," so I joined.

This sent me into a never-ending spinning wheel, and it was 4 in the morning, so I said "fuck this" and left. Hope you didn't think I was abandoning you in a scrappy room.

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Managed to get on for a while last night before little man melted down.  Didn't see anybody else online, so I decided to ruin a few rooms by myself.  Last one was funny.  Got in and saw a CEO org of two in the middle of downtown just ruining everybody.  Headed towards them, but picked up a bounty on the way, so I decided to see who would come for me instead.  Sure enough one of the two that were killing everybody came up, and got shot down for his troubles.  He came back and we got simultaneous kills on each other.  Then he went back and they resumed killing folks.  That's when I got curious and looked em up.  The one that got me was a 22, the other was a 48.  I caught up with the level 22 again and killed him about half a dozen times in a row, till his buddy set a bounty on me.  That turned into me fighting half a dozen dots.  One guy came after me while carrying CEO cargo.  That went poorly for him.  One dot finally got me somehow, and then the group dispersed.

Folks must've heard the mayor was coming to town, and mistaken me for him.  I got random friendly texts, friend requests, and crew invites the whole time I was on, plus the usual CEO and MC club invites.  Got a text from one guy saying "can I help me?".  Not sure he could.

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I think I missed Robert by just a bit. I got on and got into a room of about 8 and decided just to putter around for a bit and see what happened. I ended up trying to participate in Penned In (no takers, of course) and stole a Simeon car while I was there. By the time I got the Simeon car to the pay and spray near the docks, there was just me and one guy (a Level 202, I think) left in the room.

I took the car to the docks and noticed the dot was following me. Really? One other dude in the room and he wants to go? OK. I sell the car and go to sticky bomb up a random car when I notice the dot's too close. I crouch behind a car with a gun in my hand, waiting to see what happened next. He must have, for some reason, thought I was AFK, cause he hopped over a barrier, came up to me and kicked me to the ground. This earned him a shotgunning for his trouble.

It being Simeon's docks, I had tons of cover, and he kept making the mistake of getting right up in my face and getting shot for his trouble. I also started trying to really pay attention to my armor/snacks status, and I think that got me a couple of kills where I simply outsurvived him. He wasn't bad - it was 14-7 me when he took off in a car. I'm like "dude, where are you going?" - maybe he wanted away from the docks. I followed, but he got about halfway to that right-hand pay-and-spray and left. Cleared the room.

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Played some of this yesterday. In a session where there was this one group of three people who wouldn't start anything, but if you killed one, they'd fall on you like piranha. 

There's one dude trying to sell cars. I see him go in his garage, I wait outside, and when he comes out, I shoot him and take the car to the police station for an easy 5k.

I go off and do other shit, and later the same guy tries to sell a car. I fly over there in a Buzzard, and on the way, I lock onto one of that trio and kill him.

I land near the garage, but as I'm waiting, dude I just killed is coming up on me. I kill him again when he gets close, but here come the other two in a buzzard. At this point, the guy comes out of his garage, and I shoot him again, but the Buzzard blows up the car before I can get near it. I blow up the buzzard, call my car and haul ass outta there. The three beat on that guy for a bit. 

I message him "Dunno why those guys are so cranky." and he sends back "I kno rite? Jus tryna make some $$$ here. So lame".

That session empties out, so I join a race, Zebra. One dude and I trade paint in a tube, and he goes aggro and spins us both into the water. We both respawn and I thank him for that by putting him back in there, this time by himself. 

Unfortunately I miss that one jump with the narrow ramps on the first try, so I fall behind. I catch up to him in the tubes up, and on the last one, he tries to show me up the wall. 

I hold my line, and he comes out of the tube wrong and ends up going off the platform. 

After the race, dude has zero chill, gets his mic on and starts cussing up a storm, about 90% of it about me liking dicks (not true. I don't like this guy at all) and demanding I put a mic on. When this fails, he vows to knock me off the course in the next race. 

The next race is High Flier, and after about twenty or thirty seconds I spend the whole race in first, with no one near me. The race after that is Vespucci. It's going the same way, but I miss a jump and fall back from first to 5th.

So I just drop back to fuck with the dude. I end up knocking him into the water twice, spinning him out twice, and on the last turn, bump him into the pillars.

When the next race comes up, I go to freemode. He follows. I immediately go ghost, shoot him, and put a proxy on his car. He blows up my car, then goes to his car. Boom. I call a Buzzard and he steals a car and drives over to the construction site near the helipad, going up the ramps in his car for some reason. I blow him up again, land and message him "u so mad lol" at which point he leaves. 

Not the best punchline, but satisfying. 

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Busy night... 

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Must have killed this guy 30-some times. 

Joined a new lobby after Cristobal and I went full Wyatt's on some folks. Everybody is chirping and it's quite active...great. Set up my usual proxies in center city LSC, proceed to Petrol Point. I should mention I got a lot of kills with the proxies, but that's par the course and isn't mentionable. There's these two kids, dumbfounded on how the game works. Concentrating on hiding in the iron sculpture glitch by the beach, for no reason. These kids should've been asleep for school, but whatever. 

Well, you have to get calloused up somehow. So I beat them up, intermittently flying back to camp. Muggers, mercs, only because I can hear their reaction. Lobby dwindles from 30 to 20 to 10. Eventually it's down to the kid who is afk and the dipshit from the above photos. 

He was so geared on getting to me. It was like clockwork. He'd get nearby, I'd kill him. Spawn. Kill. Spawn, drive to Maze and get on the roof to parachute. Rinse and repeat for about a half hour. I'd keep texting him "LOL", but he was relentless, bah gawd.

I would've left sooner, but this guy was just asking for it. It became a stalemate of sorts. I wanted to see him quit. 

Anyways, new lobby was the same, albeit shorter in length, as I had some English muffins to attend to. 

Good times. 

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Jeezis, I kept saying "I got nothing for this guy." "I got no answer for this guy."

It was like a revolving carousel of guys beating the living shit out of me. I never got really down because there seemed to be a few pesky flies swarming around to shoot, several folks who were nuisances at best, to keep me distracted from the big problems. I kept killing this one guy who was terrible, and he kept spawning near me, so I had to kill him again, come on. Meanwhile, the Battle for Benny Hill is going on above me and I'm like "uh, sorry, fellas, busy. That's it, busy."

But it was, as usual, a solid team effort. Good execution and heart on the part of our guys out there.

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10 minutes ago, jstout said:

But it was, as usual, a solid team effort. Good execution and heart on the part of our guys out there.

I appreciate y'all handling acid reflux, or whatever his name was, freeing me up to deal with general big and that other guy.

That said, next time y'all want to fight a bunch of guys that can go out in the hills, y'all are on your own.  The repeating sniper makes that the opposite of fun.

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Hey, the mayor gave the assignments. We were merely executing Coach Melraz's game plan.

My favorite thing in this game is sniping. I'm no good at it, but it's still fun. At least it was fun. If someone's good with that fast sniper, I simply can't hang. I kept trying and kept trying and kept trying to snipe General Big, and he just kept putting me down. I should've quit even bothering to try to snipe him, but I kept trying and failing.

 

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Sometimes things work right in this game.  

Got on for a few minutes last night.  I'm just minding my own business standing on the pedestrian bridge west of Richards Majestic apartments when some dot rolls up on me and stops.  I decide to just hang out and see what he does.  Sure enough, he goes into cover behind the car he was driving, so I'm not surprised at all when he started shooting.  One quick Mary Lou/RPG combo and he and his car are gone.  He respawns and I give chase.  He hightails it, and before I can catch him he's been run over by one of those armored Winnebago CEO vehicles, over by the westside Ammunation.

Winnebago comes after me next and eats an RPG.  Winnebago driver's name is elsachipapa.  He doesn't know it yet, but his GTA experience for the night has just taken a turn for the worst.  For now though, I go back to work on the original dot, and on a third that turns up for some reason.  Get them a couple times each before I get run over by a Kuruma.  Elsa is apparently bringing out all his toys.  I learn he is up 2-1 on me after that.  He was 1-0 up on me from who knows how many weeks ago.  I respawn, and he has another go.  This time it doesn't go well for him, and he eats another rocket.  Bye bye Kuruma.  Its now 3 on 1, but they're outnumbered.  I kill all 3 of em a few times before the other 2 leave Elsa to his fate over by the cemetery.  Elsa manages one kill, but eats an allah akbar in return.

Half a dozen kills later, Elsa spawns on the north end of the beach.  This is unfortunate for him.  I run to that multistory parking garage across the street from the north end of the beach.  There's another dot in there already, but he turns out to be one floor below me, and never really affects things.  I snipe Elsa about a dozen times before the cops kill me.  I spawn on the beach, climb up on the balcony of one of those beach houses, and go back to work on Elsa.  He gets sniped a few more times before he finally gets smart and shoots an RPG into the wall behind me.  That's as positive as it's gonna get for Elsa tonight.  It's now 19-4.

I spawn back on the cliffside and go back to sniping him another half dozen times or so, till he winds up on the other side of the pier.  I run down to the pier and find Elsa hiding behind a tree on the south side.  He gets sniped again and winds up behind the mask shop.  Another dot rolls up on me and gets shot a couple times.  After the second kill on the new guy, I see what I think is his respawn right behind me.  Mary Lou/combat MG combo reveals I was wrong.  Elsa is back for more.  He spawns on the beach north of the pier.  He gets sniped at least a dozen times more before he finally gets away for good. 

Total time - maybe 30 minutes.  Total kills - probably about 60, including at least 40 on Elsa.  Total deaths - 4 (3 from Elsa, one from the dot that I started on).  This is the way GTA is supposed to be.

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1 hour ago, Dolfan in NYC said:

LOL.  Great story, btw, the name elsalchipapa is a food.  El Salchipapa.   Peruvian dish that's literally just mixed hot dogs and fries.  

And much like these, you ate him up for lunch. 

I wish I had known that.  The text practically write themselves.  I kinda had it in the back of my head that it was El something, but I've never heard of that dish before.

12 minutes ago, jstout said:

I could probably eat about a bucket of that, with various sawses.

Where was this guy when we needed him the other night? Did you Friend him so we can catch up to him in the future, see how he's doing, say hi?

 

To be fair, if we had run into him the night before, all you and I would've seen were a bunch of "melraz killed" messages on the left side of our screens.

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