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Grand Theft Auto V Talk.


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28 straight sets of Daily Objectives later, $500,000 bonus... $8,000,000 in the bank. Might have to start actually buying some of the heist vehicles now.

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As it turns out, this one wasn't too awfully terrible once I got into it. Everybody started with forced crowbars, but to get to the guns, you had to walk along this narrow sign and make these hard jumps. Everybody had an opportunity to get to them.

Mis - that looks like a normal drive to a mission with Melraz.

I'm in a room right now with a guy named BETER TH4N U. Guess where I'm headed.

I was getting some snacks to gear up for a mission when this happened.

I then get messages asking "u like that" and "are u a girl".

I'm taking this asshole out to sea in a chopper if I can pull it off.

 

Hell Burke, at least I got paid for it.  You're giving it up for free?

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Cap'n Cris' and the Seashark Shooter starring in Weekend At Del Perro Pier.

Story: So, my chat was stuck on everyone because I'd had a 1-on-1 deathmatch with someone who took offense to me and Petrol killing him out of Petrol's Insurgent. (Result: 5-0) We move onto killing other dots, and eventually a bounty shows up near the end of the pier. We're in my Zentorno now, and we head over. The bounty is swimming in the water and I kill it, splitting the $9K with Petrol. It becomes apparent that the bounty and his friend are two loud kids on Everyone chat. The one who thinks he knows what he's doing is trying to tell the other one what to do so they can "go see sharks". (Multiple people attempted to explain to him that sharks aren't in Online.)

The one eventually goes passive, so I get a cop car and start running him over. They bitch a lot about me and Petrol killing them. The one who thinks he knows what he's doing tells the other one to "Enable Possessive Mode". It should be noted that he utterly fails to grasp that passive mode fails when he gets in a vehicle, including a jet ski. He also keeps threatening to kick and/or report me. "I'm reporting you!" "For what?" "For being an idiot!" "Can't argue with that logic."

He goes out to sea, so I get in the jet ski. When I start to approach, he says "Is that you?" (meaning his friend) and I say "Yep!" and shoot him in the head. The murder continues until they leave, at which point I head off for dinner and Extreme Rules.

I should have just gone and read a book instead.

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NEVER! All dots must suffer, especially the kids who complain about getting killed.

 

I once had one kid say he was gonna get these guys charged with a hate crime 'cause they wouldn't leave him alone. So I joined in killing him. That's why I'm in juvy now. Hate crimes. I hate all dots that ain't us.

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I thought it was a bit odd when Extreme Rules was starting, I was looking at my PSN friends list and you and Petrol were still playing GTA. Riot kept messaging me throughout the show. He really wanted to know if Orton and Big Show won.

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Hell Burke, at least I got paid for it. You're giving it up for free?

I'm a dirty whore.

To follow up on my adventures with that dude, I decided to play along and tell him that I was a girl. Why the hell not? Let's see where this goes. Worst mistake ever.

First, he walks into the back room of the store. I follow him to see what he's doing, and he starts humping my ass again. Sends a message that says "you really like this."

I decide to take off while he's drafting more poetry to send. He eventually catches up and starts blowing the horn. I got in and he drives in an alley and sits there, like I'm a standard GTA hooker. He sends another message that says something about going on a date.

I can't take it anymore, so I blow us all up, including his Zentorno, and change sessions.

Then he starts messaging me over Xbox, asking why I did that and why we can't be friends. I finally had to block him.

The next time that happens, I'm going to hop on chat and give them the old Melraz Cat House voice.

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Hey dere i think we both need ta get our lil gals and try to find that there feller again and gettem in a chat there with our party and blow his mind there when we tell him we'll blow his balls off

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Me and one dude right at my level (the host) knew what we were doing, and one guy was cannon fodder. I'd heard about people doing this, but I'd never seen it - the leader had one of those armored Kuromas (the car) and I got in the passenger's seat and we drove into the nest of Lost we were supposed to kill and just ran them over and pistoled them into submission. I lost about half of a bar of armor.

 

We finished that one and lost one of our foursome, and that was that.

 

I have also decided I have no place in bad sport Freemode, between the armored cars and the planes and the tanks. A guy in a plane was lagging all over the place trying to kill me. He finally crashed, respawned and proceeded to snipe me about 4 times in 30 seconds while I screamed "UNCLE! UNCLE!" Every time I've been in Freemode this time, it's been a swift asskicking for me.

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