Matt D Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Next: he tries to romance Goldie Hawn. On the one hand, I found a picture of Goldie Hawn in 2014 that's so monstrous from her plastic surgery that there's a great Sister Abigail joke in there. On the other hand, Reed has been so frigging annoying with his popcorn eating on the Cosby thing lately that I don't want to justify his reference. Why is the internet so hard?
Jenalysis Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Only thing I enjoyed at all tonight was AJ-Bella. I expected a Dungeon of Doom-era WCW show tonight and I got exactly what I expected, minus an evil midget. 1
Overly Critical Man Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 I haven't watched WWE in months, but decided to order the network for the PPV. I just don't see Ambrose as a main event guy. He wasn't even that over in his home state. And his punches are awful. You guts are obsessed with worked punches, but love Ambrose? Have Mercury and Noble been wrestling? That was an awesome surprise. I really think Ambrose's problem is everything is a big fucking deal to him. He got called an asshole, he pulls out his "something got shoved up his asshole" face. Someone said he has pretty eyes, there he goes with his "look how bugged out I can make my eyes look!" face. Someone just coughs because they just have to cough, "uh oh! i'm going to get the flu! EWW! gross germs!!!" Lord help me, do I fucking hate his facial expressions. That pic they used in the banner was fucking goofy. If everything is a big fucking deal, then nothing is a big fucking deal. He is a terrible striker. Smoking cannabis can cause paranoia.
Spritenaut 32 Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Rusev @RusevBUL 5m5 minutes agoI am unbeatable @WWE and my name will be remembered for 1000 years. @LanaWWE #RusevLegacy 1,000 years? I can't wait for Rusev x Futurama. Working for the company for 1000 years is the only way to grab the brass ring if you're not Cena. In 1,000 years, I expect Vince will still be running the company. He'll be a head in a jar, a la Futurama.
Tromatagon Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 The monitor thing is to condition fan behavior. If you unplug WWE, it kills you. Dean will lose his next match by pressing the power switch. Then when he tries to change the channel he'll be even more fucked And the fans will be afraid to ever change the channel away from WWE programming again But the real answer is Sister Abigail is Horace Pinker 2
ebbie Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Next: he tries to romance Goldie Hawn. "She may have no tits, but at least she has a nice ass." (my first born goes to whoever gets that line..)
HumanChessgame Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Harper/Ziggler was fantastic and while I see the need to put on a hot match to have an exciting opener, they almost blew their wad too quickly. As several other people have said, having some type of plunder gimmick in each match, plus them all being no-dq by default, really ups the clusterfuck status. Cena/Rollins was a big offender in this, especially when it was so obvious that the more odds that came out, Cena was just going to overcome them. It took Rollins, a bolus of foreign objects, constant interference by the stooges, and Big Show yet Rollins still can't win? It just brings the same old thing with Cena going over no matter what and Rollins doesn't come off as dangerous or even that strategic, just protected by his faction. I am glad they restarted it instead of went for a 3 way at the Rumble. The rest of the card was pretty forgettable. Harper is still getting better and better though. While I'm not as anti-Reigns as a lot of people are, he definitely has his weaknesses. I was really hoping for a heel turn from him. Imagine him taking out Big Show, then spearing Cena, and just walking away, then being introduced as the next Heyman guy (Reigns needs a mouthpiece and he could do a lot worse). I like that they decided to put Ambrose/Wyatt on last, but it felt pretty anticlimactic. The whole thing is going down because Wyatt wants to turn Ambrose to the dark side and Ambrose destroyed his favorite rocking chair or something like that. The match itself was fine, but downplayed by the whole show having garbage matches. Ambrose should have worn an anti-static wrist strap and maybe he would have walked out of there victorious. 1
Patrick B. Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Next: he tries to romance Goldie Hawn. "She may have no tits, but at least she has a nice ass." (my first born goes to whoever gets that line..) I'd say, but I don't want to go Overboard. 2
Overly Critical Man Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Next: he tries to romance Goldie Hawn. "She may have no tits, but at least she has a nice ass." (my first born goes to whoever gets that line..) Overboard was a great movie. 1
ebbie Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Next: he tries to romance Goldie Hawn. "She may have no tits, but at least she has a nice ass." (my first born goes to whoever gets that line..) I'd say, but I don't want to go Overboard. Boy or girl?
rzombie1988 Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 I've only ever seen two TV's explode in my life...and they were both on WWE pay-per-views. It takes balls to book something that stupid after that NXT show. I lasted about halfway through the stairs match and went upstairs to do absolutely nothing for 2 hours then spent 10 minutes trying to see the finish to the Ambrose match.
victor Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 I didn't think much of it, I had the Dallas game on the TV, and this on the computer. They're just marking time until they got Lesnar and Reigns back. Buyrates don't matter anymore. Looks like they're gonna carry on the Wyatt/Ambrose thing a while longer.
Big Fresh Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Next: he tries to romance Goldie Hawn. "She may have no tits, but at least she has a nice ass." (my first born goes to whoever gets that line..) Somebody please answer! We gotta save that kid! 1
Cobra Commander Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 so Ambrose loses at the Rumble after he unplugs the Titantron and it explodes on him?
ebbie Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Next: he tries to romance Goldie Hawn. "She may have no tits, but at least she has a nice ass." (my first born goes to whoever gets that line..) Somebody please answer! We gotta save that kid! Hey, I didn't even watch the show. I choose See No Evil, Hear No Evil and Mouse Hunt on Netflix.
Matt D Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Yeah, you guys all failed the internet. Great job. Way to let the bad guys win. Pavlov is smiling in his grave. Also, the PPV was perfectly fine, quite good at points, but gurgled a bit under the weight of hoss battles and gimmick spots. It was better than what people are saying and way better than people's expectations. 7
piranesi Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 I'd like to think Dean was imagining this: I'd also like to watch that movie right now. 1
Big Fresh Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 You're a handsome devil. What's your name? 2
Greggulator Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Harper/Ziggler was awesome. Great opening match. They should have had that as the main event. The ladder match gimmick works because there's a chase to it -- there's something both guys are going to. That makes all the violence and ladders and garbage have a point. Climb towards that and go. There's a natural anticipation to someone grabbing a title/briefcase/custody papers. If that match went last, on top of it being in Ziggler's hometown, you have a subtle natural build the whole night. A Ziggler promo at some point would add a lot of energy. It's not too hard to make it a main event match, either -- another "Can Ziggler do it again?" moment. I get why Bray/Ambrose went on last -- that's a blood feud with two lunatics. But I'd rather this match go on last.The chairs match gimmick is so dumb. I'm so in favor of guys not hitting each other in the heads with chairs anymore. That's what they should do. A chairshot to the ribs and back in a sneak attack or whatever is really acceptable violence. But if you have a match with a chair and don't hit someone in the head with it... that's a really lame gimmick. Just get rid of a chair match stipulation. And the match didn't even end with Ryback doing the Shellshock through or on any chairs. Just a dumb stipulation.Rusev/Swagger was great. Rusev's really good at these hard-hitting sprints. He's so, so, so good. Great psychology throughout and he sells wonderfully. I'm really mad Lana didn't get to do her promo about oil prices. As someone who has written professionally about the energy industry for a few years, and wrote his master's thesis on Russia using its natural resources as a political weapon in Ukraine, I was about to see many of my worlds collide.That was my problem with Rowan and Show. The match itself was fine. Those two dudes beat each other up with steps. Rowan looked insane just tossing Show onto those steps. But you have The Largest Athlete In The World and the new up-and-coming giant. There are the strongest men alive. Every single punch/chokeslam/forearm smash/move with a step should kill whoever is hit with it. Just make it a 3-minute match where these dudes just beat each other up with steps, sell for like two seconds, and get right back into it. The Cena/Rollins match was decent. Tables matches are also a pretty dumb gimmick match. The main event was a great garbage match. I thought the ending to it was fine. How is an exploding television monitor any more ridiculous than a man rebounding off of ring ropes? My only problem with the main event was where it was placed. If you put that match as the only hardcore match at any other PPV, everyone would be going crazy for it. (WIth or without the ending.)
piranesi Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Come on, boy! Grab it! Grab itNOOOooooo HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!! Next month, maybe! 5
Patrick B. Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Next: he tries to romance Goldie Hawn. "She may have no tits, but at least she has a nice ass." (my first born goes to whoever gets that line..) I'd say, but I don't want to go Overboard. Boy or girl? I overfed my dad's fish one time. Entrusting me with children seems like a bad idea. 1
rzombie1988 Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Oh and some of those spots in that ladder match were so dumb. They looked awful and they legit hurt both wrestlers! That's the exact opposite thing you want to do.
Big Fresh Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Next: he tries to romance Goldie Hawn. "She may have no tits, but at least she has a nice ass." (my first born goes to whoever gets that line..) I'd say, but I don't want to go Overboard. Boy or girl? I overfed my dad's fish one time. Entrusting me with children seems like a bad idea. Plus, isn't that court ordered injuction still in effect?
Patrick B. Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Come on, boy! Grab it! Grab itNOOOooooo HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!! Next month, maybe! Ooh...almost got it...
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