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Raw 12-8-14 - Slammys 2014


MGFanJay

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You guys are all forgetting the biggest markout moment of the night:

 

LIVE, Via Archival FOootage

 

BATISTA!  Once again he appeared magically out of nowhere, from that one time he showed up wearing



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this exact outfit from Anne Taylor Loft

If you think I'm kidding:


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and, once again he does that thing no one does quite like him!


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loses the big one to a guy people like better...



and just as we were adjusting ourselves to a world once again warm and snuggly with Dave...he was gone again...

but not before

stopping at Coldwater Creek to pick up this middle-aged-junior-high-school-art-teacher sweater dress

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I don't know why he chose not to wear the bottlecap necklace that comes with it, but THAT'S WHY I'M NOT THE MOST BEAUTIFUL MAN IN THE WORLD!!!"



Goddammit, we miss you so damn much, Dave!!!!
 

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It would have looked better if Ambrose showed up in a 1982 Datsun 210 with a tri-color paint job.  With one of the colors being rust.

He should have showed up on the bike he stole from an elementary school.

222814_ts.jpg

 

Dean would have a shiv hidden in the pink styrofoam pad.

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Great to see Charlotte on Raw and liked what little we got of her vs Nattie.

It was like the crowd never saw NXT and was like 'WTF is this' and when does she beat up the entire women's roster in one night.

 

 

Maybe if more of those cheapskates subscribed to the Network, this problem wouldn't exist.

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It would have looked better if Ambrose showed up in a 1982 Datsun 210 with a tri-color paint job.  With one of the colors being rust.

He should have showed up on the bike he stole from an elementary school.

222814_ts.jpg

 

 

 

I have a brother who got a DUI and almost got put on the sex offender list because he rode one of those things at 3 in the morning.

 

Does that mean my brother is more Dean Ambrose than Dean Ambrose?

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Three things I did like:

Seeing Charlotte on Raw. Even though he match with Nattie was like a Cliff Notes version of the great one they had on NXT,

 

AJ name dropping all the NXT girls and even throwing Paige in there. I'm kind of a Nikki mark because I think she's sorta underrated but I'm a total NXT fanboy who can't wait for the next generation of Divas who can work and have interesting characters to get up to the main roster.

 

Finding out Tyson Kidd evidently subscribes to LootCrate. (LootCrate is a monthly subscription service that sends you a box of nerdy kitsch objects every month. Two months ago they sent us a shirt with a bunch of Kittens laying in the shape of a skull - the shirt he wore today).

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For anyone who thinks it weird that ambulance was apparently carrying a ladder, a table, and Dean's dry ice sculpture of Castle GraySkull, you need to remember the already canonical trouble Dean has remembering what different vehicles are for.

Sadly this means that whenever he is injured or frightened, he immediately crawls into the back of the first UHaul he sees and starts yelling "WHY AREN'T WE MOVING??? DINESH DSOUZA WAS RIGHT OHMAMACARE IS KILLING ME!!!!  DAMN YOU MAMA!!!!!"

"Um...sir, this is a UHaul."

"DUH!  and UUUUUUUU  NEED TO HAAAAAAAAUUUUUL ME to the Free Fruit Cup store!"

"You mean the Hospital?"

"YOU SAY TOMATO, I SAY FAT BLOOD SLUG!!!"

"I'm just going to lock you in here until the police come."

"I don't need to go to the airport!"

"Well, I'D RATHER BE MEETING RODDY PIPER...I'm sorry, sir.  It's just, you tire me."
 

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It would have looked better if Ambrose showed up in a 1982 Datsun 210 with a tri-color paint job.  With one of the colors being rust.

He should have showed up on the bike he stole from an elementary school.

222814_ts.jpg

 

 

 

I have a brother who got a DUI and almost got put on the sex offender list because he rode one of those things at 3 in the morning.

 

Does that mean my brother is more Dean Ambrose than Dean Ambrose?

 

Was your brother Jimmy Del Ray?

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Finding out Tyson Kidd evidently subscribes to LootCrate. (LootCrate is a monthly subscription service that sends you a box of nerdy kitsch objects every month. Two months ago they sent us a shirt with a bunch of Kittens laying in the shape of a skull - the shirt he wore today).

 

Now we just need to figure out which "LC unboxing video!!!!" account is his on Youtube.

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It would have looked better if Ambrose showed up in a 1982 Datsun 210 with a tri-color paint job.  With one of the colors being rust.

He should have showed up on the bike he stole from an elementary school.

222814_ts.jpg

 

 

 

I have a brother who got a DUI and almost got put on the sex offender list because he rode one of those things at 3 in the morning.

 

Does that mean my brother is more Dean Ambrose than Dean Ambrose?

 

Was your brother Jimmy Del Ray?

 

 

Nah. The asshole doesn't have that much ambition to be that sleazy.

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Finding out Tyson Kidd evidently subscribes to LootCrate. (LootCrate is a monthly subscription service that sends you a box of nerdy kitsch objects every month. Two months ago they sent us a shirt with a bunch of Kittens laying in the shape of a skull - the shirt he wore today).

 

Now we just need to figure out which "LC unboxing video!!!!" account is his on Youtube.

 

 

The one with all the cats playing with the packing materials.

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I enjoyed the show for what it was but some odd choices for noms and winners. I really felt Wyatts and The Shield from EC should have been on the MOTY list too.

This was cool:

jVooxRA.gif

 

 

I feel like I don't get this.

 

 

I get hokey wrestling, but this Dean Ambrose shit is too over the top for me. Maybe because they are trying to past it off as super duper serious business.

 

 

Obviously all the meth Ambrose is smoking in that ambulance cured his injury.

RVD was doing bong hits in the front while Ambrose was cooking meth in the back. Afterwards, they were going to race against Sabu in his dilapidated winnebago.

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Seriously, what was up with that ambulance? Was there any attempt to explain why Dean was arriving from the set of a Sisters of Mercy video?

That was hilarious. Even in the longshot, you could see the inside was completely smoke-filled.

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