WWE version ECW Retrospective

[Goodear]

So hey, I got me the Hulu plus because I wanted to watch me some NXT and you are not my real dad and I will spend my money however I want.  You are not my real dad!  Daddy fought in the great war and died fighting Hitler!  Screw you Steve!  

 

Ahem.

 

Know what else is on Hulu plus?  The WWE version of ECW that I remember so fondly for awesome stuff like WWE Television Champion Christian and Big Daddy V and Tony Atlas laughing and Zack Ryder actually being good at something!  So how about a retrospective?  Because I have nothing better to do than slog through this stuff in neat little bite size nummies.

 

We begin with episode 84 because that is where an uninterrupted string begins until the very last episode.  I'm watching matches and ignoring promos for the most part because I am nothing if not LAZY AS SHIT.  Matches are rated on Yes or No in terms of whether anyone would ever want to watch this stuff.

 

Season 3, Episode 84 "Chavo's Last Dance"

 

Triple P: Promo Plot Point.  ECW Champion CM Punk gets beat up by Chavo Guerrero Jr. and Edge and shoved into the ring post a bunch.  Punk still has hair, Chavo still has a bald spot and Edge still has a neck.  You know, for context.

 

WWE Tag Team Champions Miz and John Morrison vs. The Highlanders 

 

The Highlanders are immortal.  They have inside them blood of kings.  YEAH.  They have no rival.  No man can be their equal.  Miz and Morrison come out separately because ... no reason.  Miz as a fedora wearing douche is something I still look back on fondly.  This match is a bit on speed as Duncan becomes immortal in peril very quickly when Miz pushed him off the middle rope in a nice spot.  Duncan gets to Conner pretty quickly though and he is all on fire very briefly with a powerslam before getting caught with Miz's knee lift-neck breaker combination for three. 

 

Yep or Nope:  NOPE

 

Kofi Kingston introduction vignette.  It's shockingly awesome.  He debuts NXT week.

 

Dancing Womens!

 

Kane vs. Colin Delaney

 

The whole Colin thing has been going on for three weeks at this point.  And by thing I mean he gets pummeled.  This is short enough that its not boring per say but it isn't rough enough for Colin to get the full Mulkey treatment.  I imagine the Mark Henry and Big Daddy V matches were more fun.

 

Yep or Nope:  NOPE

 

Shelton Benjamin vs. Nunzio

 

Oh Shelton, remember when everyone thought he was going to be the next big thing?  Oh Team Angle, we hardly knew ya.  I think the issue here is that Shelton is trying to be physical here when he should have been aiming for smooth or athletic.  He's just not going to stand out roughing people up when Mark Henry is on the same show.  I mean Nunz can make a mutha look good and he did his best bumping off a high crotch throw and a exploder throw but this isn't what Shelton should have been doing.  Should a 240 pound guy be really doing the grab the guy by the throat counter to a sunset flip?  Turnbuckle bomb counter to a Sicilian Slice is a nice move but the complete shot finisher looked like shit from a dog's bum.  He hits another Little Jimmy Gold Standard Play of the Day thing because he's a jerk.

 

Yep or Nope:  NOOOOOOPE.

 

ECW Champeen CM Punk vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.  - Non title 

 

I don't generally enjoy Chavo and thought he was miscast as an ECW main event player when the brand needed legitimacy.  Edge is out to join commentary because at some point he is going to do something.  Punk does a pretty decent job keeping his shoulder selling going by basing his stuff on kicks.  But Chavo gets a arm bar pretty quickly and goes to work on the arm.  Arn Anderson he is not as we seem to focus on Edge more than what is going on in the ring.

 

Time for commercials!

 

Back to the show and we are back to square one as the announcers microphones are off.  Back to the arm goes Chavo and its dull.  Painfully dull.  Chavo's problem was always that he couldn't kick things up a gear or draw significant heat.  Punk's trying to sell his way to some reaction but Chavo is not compelling in any way working him over.  I mean he is there mechanically and all but man am I bored.  And I love me some limb work.  Love it.  But this is making me sleepy.  I am (of course) shocked that Edge gets involved and hits Punk with the Smackdown title and gets him counted out.

 

Yep or Nope:  NOPE

 

Crap what was I thinking?

[greenbat]

I just remember being so disappointed well after week because I thought MAYBE it would be something like ecw. The day Lashley squashed Balls, Sandman and life 2 other ecw originals like it was nothing I just gave up andi think that's the last time I watched wrestling for 6 or 7 years.

Recently my friends was watching old ppv and they had Kane vs Chavo for the title. It fuckin sucked.

[Web Conn]

I remember the last year and a half of ECW was really fun it hit a stride with The Abraham Washington Show, Monster Heel Mark Henry, Tommy Dreamer-Christian BBF's but not really, Shaemus vs Finlay, Yoshi Tatsu, William Regal, Tourettes Goldust and Ezekiel Jackson. It was just a lot of fun. Somebody on the old board summed it up the best saying "ECW is an hour of wrestling on television just for the sake of an hour of wrestling on television" and that was when it was at its best.

[Goodear]

Season 3, Episode 85 "Royal Rumble Countdown"

 

Last week I was bored by Chavo Guerrero!  Rematch this week! 

 

Over the top rope challenge which is in no way a Battle Royal

 

Kane, Miz, John Morrison's Abs, Tommy Dreamer and Shelton Benjamin are your competitors.  Tommy shows some pretty good fire here but runs into Kane's choke before getting dumped to the floor.  The heels triple team Kane (who is a ... face? now) and Shelton gets the inverted bulldog play of the gold standard whats up shot before the tag team champs turn on him.  This gives Kane the chance to sit up and go on a Libertarian rampage.  He eliminates Miz and Morrison but Shelton skins the cat and pulls Kane out with his legs.  There ain't no stopping him trying to get his catch phrase over.

 

Yep or Nope: NOPE

 

ECW Best body contest sets us back 14 years as a people!  I don't even know who the one woman is.

 

Kofi Kingston vs. David Owen

 

Debut here for Kofi and they fuck up a leg sweep a few moments in before Owen takes over with brawls.  They fuck up a monkey flip moments later and then fuck up another thing and Kofi's job must be flashing before his eyes at this point.  Boom drop sets up the TINP ends this thing.  Argh.

 

Yep or Nope: NOPE NOPE NOPE

 

Great Khali vs. Collin Delaney

 

Tazz just comes off as a complete cock bag in these prematch promos.  Collin does a good deer in the headlights as he stares into the nipples of fear.  Brain Chop and Tree Slam and Head Crush and we are done.   This was a delight to watch as everything Khali does looks like pure murder as Delaney totally rags out.  Ladies and Gentlemen, the first thing I give a Yep to involves The Great Khali.

 

Yep or Nope:  YEP!

 

ECW Title: CM Punk vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.

 

Edge is back because he is!  This match is no disqualification... would it have killed them to say Extreme Rulz?  Every time Joey refers to Vicky Guerrero as Edge's lover, I want to die inside just because Joey saying it is so icky.  Punk's shoulder is fine again so don't you worry about that as a plot point.  Punk clubbers away and these strikes are not so good.  Punk proves me wrong with a high round kick that knocks Chavo off the apron that catches him behind the ear.  Suicide dive follow up and Punk made a good decision not throwing chops later in his career.  Just saying.  Chavo reverses a suplex on the outside and drops Punk on the ring steps.  Chavo works Punk over and does a nice baseball slide into the ribs.  Abdominal stretch is applied and somewhere Mike Rotundo smiles.  It doesn't last long.  These guys do not have great chemistry as things seem a step off as they move about the ring.  Chavo hits the three amigos and goes for the frog splash but Punk is out in time.  Punk hits the Go to Sleep but Edge is in to interfere with the spear* so Chavo can get the pin and the title.

 

Yep or Nope: Nah.  This one never got out of second gear as Chavo didn't have the in with the crowd to make his stuff feel meaningful.  And since he was so not capable in this spot, he brought Punk down to his level instead of coming up to his.  The other thing is that we just had Edge interfere last week and this was so telegraphed that it lost any osrt of impact.

 

* Any resemblance between Edge's spear and any other spear living or dead is purely coincidental.  

[Goodear]

I'm not selling this very well am I?  I'm ready for this to be good now please.

 

Episode 86: CM Punk Crashes Chavo's Championship Fiesta

 

Kane vs. Shelton Benjamin

 

Shelton tries to brawl with Kane and shockingly loses although they make a nice call back to last week's skin the cat spot.  Kane goes up top but Shelton jumps to the top rope to take Kane down with a front facelock.  But by the time the replay is over, Kane has already fired back.  Benjy goes to the wheels instead and seems to get some momentum that way.  Kane does some decent work from his back trying to get Shelton off his leg.  Single leg Boston is on but Kane grabs him by the guzzle and pounds away.  Powerslam gets two and Kane doesn't do a bad sell job here.  They also do a nice suplex reversal spot that goes in a decent direction, Kane goes for the chokeslam but eats the dragon whip kick.  Shelton goes to the top but ends up eating a boot in the short term.  Benjamin takes a hike and gets counted out.  

 

Yep or Nope:  Yep!  Terrible finish that brings it down, but not a bad showing by either guy.  Kane does a good understated leg sell here and does a good job getting Shelton over.

 

Kelly Kelly vs. Victoria

 

Layla and Whatsherface come out while Vic dominates Kelly with some ease.  Vic goes for the spiders web but Kelly counters with a head scissors.  Kelly hits a couple clotheslines and a frankensteiner but walks into the widow's peak and we are done.  Short but not as bad as you might think.  Kelly had a lot more going for her than anyone really thought at the time.  Why there aren't 14 people using the widow's peak right now is a criminal waste.

 

Yep or Nope:  Yep

 

Miz and John Morrison's Abs vs. Collin Delaney 

 

SULLIVAN!  I bring you the HIMALAYYYYYAS, THE YETAAAAAY!  Oh wait no.  Miz forearms the crap out of Collin to start but Colin gets some actual offense this week by falling out of the way of the tag champions.  Miz just yanks Collin under the bottom rope to the floor in a great bump spot.  Tag champs hit a double face smash before hitting the reality check and the moonlight drive for the pin.  They get some post match jollies before Tommy Dreamer runs them off.  Miz looked really good here with his strikes and being a dick head.

 

Yep or Nope:  Yep

 

CM Punk vs. Elijah Burke 

 

Burke looked really good in the early going and was on point with some nice body punches and controlling Punk with a rear chin lock.and a body scissors.  Punk comes back though super fast and catches Elijah in a leap frog and drops him with a G2S out of no where.  I think Burke woke up in TNA thinking he was the Pope of Chili Town.

 

Yep or Nope: Nah there wasn't enough here to make it into the Yep column.  It was well on its way though.

 

Kofi Kingston vs. Rob 'Mark' Ecko 

 

MUCH better showing this week than last as Kofi looks pretty smooth here as Ecko feeds him nicely.

 

Yep or Nope: Yap.

 

There is a fiesta and CM Punk crashes it.  Sure why not.

[Overly Critical Man]

If I'm not mistaken, Rob Ecko is Robbie E, so it's no surprise he was a good jobber.

[Sky Blue Sam]

Season 3, Episode 85 "Royal Rumble Countdown"

Kofi Kingston vs. David Owen

 

Debut here for Kofi and they fuck up a leg sweep a few moments in before Owen takes over with brawls.  They fuck up a monkey flip moments later and then fuck up another thing and Kofi's job must be flashing before his eyes at this point.  Boom drop sets up the TINP ends this thing.  Argh.

 

Yep or Nope: NOPE NOPE NOPE

 

Just had to check this on YouTube to see how bad it was and yeah, the mistakes are pretty glaring. Kingston also gave the generic jobber a bit too much offence. Another goof is on the electronic screen they have below the Titantron, where they show the MVP animation under the Kofi video

[ebbie]

I've always felt like the best thing to come out of WWECW was the fact that someone realized how great Layla looks with straight hair.

[supremebve]

I've always felt like the best thing to come out of WWECW was the fact that someone realized how great Layla looks with straight hair.

How dare you.  Curly Layla is clearly the superior Layla.  Curly Layla is probably my #1 diva ever, straight Layla barely makes the top three.

[Phantom Lord]

ECW on SyFy would have made a decently good 11PM Saturday Night rasslin program. You were at least going to get one good match on the show. Why they threw it on Tuesday nights so they could air it at first live and then only like a one or two hour tape delay always puzzled me. You get a lead in like the Syfy Saturday Night movies and WWECW would have done pretty well.

 

But the whole purpose of WWECW was for Vince just to do some stuff that he never got to do with WCW. Like you just know Vince would have pinned Flair for the WCW Title back in 2001 if he could have. I'm just sad we never got Vince vs. The Sandman. But hey, Bobby "Brock Lesnar Lite" Lashley seemed to be a good idea at the time.

[Skeeball Wizard]

My favorite part of WWECW was probably the Yoshi Tatsu push. He was great there, and probably the most protected guy in the company at that point. Christian putting on solid matches with everyone from Swagger to Ryder to Dreamer was another highlight.

[Parties]

The show had some good matches/workers. They had Finlay being Finlay for a while. Matt Hardy and Mark Henry had a good feud. And Christian vs. Swagger 2/10/09 is so good that Phil in his review asked if it was the best match ever produced under the name ECW.

 

Lashley beating Balls Mahoney and three other dudes is the kind of thing that Heyman would have done (and did do) in the mid-90s. I would guess it was his idea. He's always about the next big thing, always willing to beat "his" guys to build new stars. Rhino, Awesome, Credible... they beat everyone. He's gotten great mileage out of guys who were over the hill (the Funks, Bigelow, Dusty, Tommy Rich), but those were huge stars worth preserving.

[cwoy2j]

ECW on SyFy would have made a decently good 11PM Saturday Night rasslin program. You were at least going to get one good match on the show. Why they threw it on Tuesday nights so they could air it at first live and then only like a one or two hour tape delay always puzzled me. You get a lead in like the Syfy Saturday Night movies and WWECW would have done pretty well.

 

But the whole purpose of WWECW was for Vince just to do some stuff that he never got to do with WCW. Like you just know Vince would have pinned Flair for the WCW Title back in 2001 if he could have. I'm just sad we never got Vince vs. The Sandman. But hey, Bobby "Brock Lesnar Lite" Lashley seemed to be a good idea at the time.

 

Oh god, Vince vs. Sandman would've been epic. I remember reading that Vince was a big fan of Sandman. I remember him getting a mini-push at one point when he moved over to RAW. He was the last guy eliminated in a battle royal to determine the GM of RAW (Regal ended up winning after shenanigans). Sandman as GM would've been pretty good fun.

[Jingus]

I'm glad I'm not the only one who enjoyed Colin Delaney, that kid was a great Nise Mikey Whipwreck.  

 

Am I the only one who kinda enjoyed the original 2006 run of ECW?  It wasn't great (I called up Joel Gertner after the very first broadcast and the pain was evident in his voice when he said "Well... it was EXTREME~!, I'll give them that much...") but it gave us a lot of fun train-wreck shit and a hell of a lot of I Never Thought I'd See This Guy Wrestle That Guy dream mismatches.  I even liked what Paul E was clearly trying to do with the storyline, casting himself as a corporate sellout and playing up the ECW Orginal squad of Sandman/Sabu/RVD/Dreamer attempting to beat the hardcore back into their sanitized company.  

[Web Conn]

The WWECW gave us Sabu vs Kurt Angle.

[Hollywood Cibernetico]

I enjoyed WWECW. Tons of awesome matches, etc. I'm enjoying the reviews here. With this thread and the IYH thread, I think I might start my own little project.

[PetrolCB]

ECW on SyFy would have made a decently good 11PM Saturday Night rasslin program. You were at least going to get one good match on the show. Why they threw it on Tuesday nights so they could air it at first live and then only like a one or two hour tape delay always puzzled me. You get a lead in like the Syfy Saturday Night movies and WWECW would have done pretty well.

But the whole purpose of WWECW was for Vince just to do some stuff that he never got to do with WCW. Like you just know Vince would have pinned Flair for the WCW Title back in 2001 if he could have. I'm just sad we never got Vince vs. The Sandman. But hey, Bobby "Brock Lesnar Lite" Lashley seemed to be a good idea at the time.

Oh god, Vince vs. Sandman would've been epic. I remember reading that Vince was a big fan of Sandman. I remember him getting a mini-push at one point when he moved over to RAW. He was the last guy eliminated in a battle royal to determine the GM of RAW (Regal ended up winning after shenanigans). Sandman as GM would've been pretty good fun.

re: Vince liking Sandman

Wasn't he also one of the close possibilities for the Mr. McMahon illegitimate son storyline payoff? There's some interview where Sandman (while narrating the clip) was talking about being super concussed and forgetting some cues as Vince was trying to wrap up that segment.

[Hagan]

The fact that Cena vs Sabu happened justified anything else with ECW coming back. 

 

I really liked Dreamer winning the belt 

[Patrick B.]

The other Extreme Expose chick(that wasn't Kelly or Layla) would have been Brooke Adams/Tessmacher.

[Big Fresh]

I still woulda liked to see Sabu vs. Undertaker somewhere in there.

[Goodear]

Season 3, Episode 87  Guerrero Faces Punk in Gulf of Mexico Match

 

We open with CM Punk talking about crashing a Fiesta and cultural sensitivity abounds.  He is interrupted by Chavo and Armando Estrada who make match tonight where someone is going to get thrown into the Gulf of Mexico.  I don't do play-by-play of these promos because I can't type out Hispanic pronunciations properly.

 

Layla and Victoria w/ Lena Somethingsomething vs. Kelly Kelly Kelly & Michelle McTaker

 

Another decent outing from the ladies as Kelly uses her athletic talents fairly effectively once she gets a really ugly cartwheel elbow out of her system in the opening moments.  McCool and Victoria take the 'bulk' of the match (which went maybe two minutes) and there ain't nothing wrong with that as Michelle pulls out an interesting step up frankensteiner and a kick to Vic's face from her knees.  Kelly comes in and gets tripped from the outside before getting crushed with the Widow's Peak.

 

Yep o Nope:  Nope, too short to actually go anywhere and had some awkwardness in there that dropped it off this super important ranking system.

 

Tommy Dreamer w/ Colin Delaney vs. John Morrison w/ The Miz

 

Tommy moves about twice as quickly as Konan which is to say... not fast.  Joey tries to get Tommy over as being into pain but that doesn't fit with his performances.  John seems to be moving at three-quarters speed so Tommy can keep up and its really just not working at this point.  Everything is just moving at a ginger pace and never gets out of second gear.  Miz and Delaney get involved and Dreamer 'takes the eye off the ball' long enough for Morrison to get the neckbreaker for the win.  Just sort of there.

 

Yep o Nope:  NOOOOPE

 

Stevie Richards will be back next week and hopefully he won't get hurt again.   I can't keep things strait mentally so I have no idea which comeback this was.

 

Kofi Kingston vs. James Curtis

 

Very much a old school Tom Zenk-esque NWA baby face squash with arm drags and stuff like that there.  Curtis is no Wild Bill Irwin and this thing just dies on the vine.  Kofi gives way too much to these guys and lets them lead the matches and really only Ecko was any good at that.

 

Yep o Nope:  Nope

 

CM Punk vs. ECW Champion Chavo Guerrero Jr. in Gulf of Mexico Match *Non Title*

 

Luke warm crowd brawling punctuated by an awkward 30 seconds looking at the entrance Chavo and CM went through does not an exciting contest make.  Things pick up as they go outside proper and Chavo throws Punk into the windshield of a moving car. The momentum is totally killed though as they go to commercial.  Now, I understand why commercials are a part of our lives and all but this just cut a match off at the ankles just as it starting to escalate.

 

We are back Punk has recovered from the car incident to backdrop Chavo into a van.  The selling here is subpar as neither guy really put over stuff that should be put over more heavily.  They are also totally scaring away the fish.  Chavo goes to suplex Punk off the pier but it gets reversed into a G2S which bumps him into the water.

 

Sigh.  Just a soulless brawl.  Bleh.

 

Yep o Nope:  NOPE 

[Goodear]

Season 3: Episode 88 Finding the Way into No Way Out

 

Promo Promo Promo: Chavo Guerrero and Armando Estrada set up a match between CM Punk and Mark Henry tonight.  Chavo would fight Punk instead but he has a sinus infection.

 

Stevie Richards vs. Rory Cox

 

Okay squash for Stevie which is totally unremarkable.  SteVieT ends this.

 

Y-0-N:  Nah.

 

Kelly Kelly Kelly Kelly vs. Layla w/ Lena Yadda

 

Other than a pretty good head scissors segment from Layla, this is a nothing divas match which followed an okay template but lacked in execution.  Kelly is at her best using her gymnastic stuff and instead this was focused on Layla working her arm.  Kelly rallies and hits the rocker dropper for the finish.

 

Y-0-N: Nope

 

Kofi Kingston vs. Mike Knox

 

Knox is at not yet at his shaggy peak but still does a decent job of reigning Kofi in and making with the clubber.  Knox doesn't make the match up about him but does enough to not look like a complete job guy.  He does a pretty good job of putting himself in position for Kofi's stuff.

 

Y-0-N:  If you enjoy World Wide style matches sure.

 

John Morrison w/ The Miz vs. Tommy Dreamer w/ Colin Delaney

 

Again?  This time Dreamer gets the DDT and the pin but the heart of this thing just isn't there.  Tommy is so lifeless at this point that the upset win doesn't get the reaction that it should.  Miz and Morrison double up on Colin post match which totally kills any buzz that the win may have generated.  

 

Y-0-N: Naaaaaaaaaaope

 

The Trial of Mark Henry for the Murder of CM Punk

 

Chavo comes out to make me actively care less.  Punk kicks Mark in the leg and Henry smiles at him because god damn I love Mark Henry.  Punk lays into Mark with some nice strikes including a spinning back fist that he should have kept on the regular before walking into a Vader barge.  Punk rallies with the high knee in the corner but gets shrugged off when he goes for the bulldog.  Mark just lends this credibility to everything in that he plays immovable object to even basic things.  This is what people are talking about when they talk about making an opponent 'earn everything'.  Even simple things like bending Punk over the ropes looks like death and ... it gets Henry DQed.  Well that was not great.  Chavo gets in the ring and dropped with the G2S again.

 

Y-0-N: Nope.  Sure its decent but this wasn't given really enough time to develop the way it could have. It was overall a disappointment.

[mco543]

I haven't rewatched it but at the time I really liked the Kelly/Layla feud because they looked like they hadn't grasped that pro wrestling is a work and were actually beating the shit out of each other.

[Goodear]

It doesn't help that Kelly has arms like toothpicks that look like they could snap at any moment.

[Domino_Not_Deuce]

Man, I love that Gulf of Mexico match since they get a lot of the little details right with the brawling through the crowd. Sucks that you don't like this stuff because I think it was a great little wrestling show as early as late 2007.