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Co-oping Toward Hatred


Big Fresh

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Like I said on YouTube, not selling DOA X3 in the states was a very good business decision.  When I worked at Gamestop, I recall that the first title really didn't sell all that well.  Seriously, who the fuck regularly plays volleyball games anyway? 

 

MGFanJay?

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Oh, Dear God, no.   We had the first version of the game on a display machine at GameStop in spite of policy and the staff was all "We've sunk to a new low..." 

 

It really is just a creepy spin-off and one of the tamest Rated M games around.  The girls wear skimpy swimsuits and occasionally they fall into a swimming pool.  Big friggin' whoop. 

 

Now GTA: Lost and the Damned.  There is a game that earned its M rating legit and I wish to God that I could unsee some of the things I saw in that game..

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We played Battletoads. We have no "too low".

 

Battletoads is infuriating because it is difficult for the sake of being difficult.  It may drive you to heroin use, but it won't taint your soul.

 

DOA Extreme Volleyball is for pervs with relationship issues that refuse to admit to themselves that the only way they will see a semi-clothed woman is to play that game.   

 

You can almost feel the shame welling up in your heart and the slime coating your eyes as you look at the game box. 

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Like I said on YouTube, not selling DOA X3 in the states was a very good business decision.  When I worked at Gamestop, I recall that the first title really didn't sell all that well.  Seriously, who the fuck regularly plays volleyball games anyway? 

 

It is a game about tits and everyone knows it.  Furthermore, it is the game where you can ogle your favorite DOA virtual girl without the hassle of displaying your shitty fighting game stylings in a real DOA game and being unable to unlock new outfits to dress your favorite DOA virtual girl in, because your combo skills suck and you repeatedly get your ass beat.

 

No need to waste precious marketing dollars or press new copies for shipping to the US for a title that will only satisfy a niche of the population when word of mouth and import channels will suffice.

 

If it is an ogling of virtual boobies point of contention, there are far better (or worse) places on the internet where a creepy, lonely jackanape with a laptop and relationship issues can do that sort of thing for absolutely free so no need to import this dumb game.

 

Gamers be whinin'.

 

Here is the list of the 3 original Xbox games I played more then 50 hours on Xbox 360

 

Knights of the Old Republic

Knights of the Old Republic 2

Outlaw Volleyball.

 

I love me some Volleyball games.

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*shrug* The mechanics in teh game are pretty good, and it plays pretty damn well. The extra stuff is eye rolling, but it plays well as a Volleyball game.

 

The GameStop crew extensively played what passed for volleyball in the first two games and it sucked.  Tracking the ball to set up bump set spike routines and setting up winning shots is nigh impossible with the wonky camera. 

 

The camera is there for ogling; not for helping your team of scantily clad beach warriors win volleyball games.

 

The tournaments and dumb mini games are there for the sole purpose of unlocking the barely there swimsuits.  No more, no less.

 

There are far easier and more rewarding ways for a grognard to his jolly on for virtual boobies and it ain't DOA Extreme Volleyball.

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Look, I just want a god damned decent Volleyball game that isn't on the original Xbox.

 

Volleyball is the club footed. hunchbacked, cleft palate having mutant of sports titles that is locked in a basement somewhere, bro.

 

You will have an easier time finding a curling or cricket game on current gen than you will a volleyball game.

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Or you could just play Volleyball, ignore the stupid shit, and have a good time.

 

The stupid shit is the centerpiece of the franchise and the gameplay mechanics are worthless and prevent you from having a good time just playing volleyball.

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I'm very pissed this discussion did not take place in my comments section.

 

All of the best shit ends up on your Facebook.  Some of the people you quote on your GGW vids are fucking lunatics.

 

You can always quote us in a follow-up show.

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I'm very pissed this discussion did not take place in my comments section.

All of the best shit ends up on your Facebook. Some of the people you quote on your GGW vids are fucking lunatics.

You can always quote us in a follow-up show.

Dong psychics.

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So what are the odds JT actually likes DOA Volleyball games, but he knows his Wife reads the board when he's not looking?

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So what are the odds JT actually likes DOA Volleyball games, but he knows his Wife reads the board when he's not looking?

 

My wife is the kind of woman who would put on one of those skimpy bikinis for me so why the fuck would I need a virtual placebo?

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