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The WWE Total Divas Thread

rzombie1988

By rzombie1988
in WWE PROGRAMMING

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Jiji

Jiji

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I think Cena just likes his life as it is. I did find myself sympathizing with Nikki when she correctly pointed out she was making all the sacrifices and he wasn't making any. 

 

We can call Nikki annoying and over-bearing, but it's pretty obvious who's calling the shots in this relationship.

Vince McMahon?

 

vince-mcmahon-triple-h-gorilla-position-

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Reed

Reed

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He got her picture frames and candles and stuff though.

 

Also, Nikki is dating Cena and starring in an E! reality show.  She's freaking set now.  She may be making "sacrifices" but it's exploded her career.

 

Yeah, but look at Mickie James' predicament of how dating Cena is a double-edged sword. He decides one day he doesn't want to be with her, and maybe it's too awkward to have her around, she's screwed.

 

That's basically why Chyna was driven out too. She did want more cash and made wacky demands, but it essentially boiled down to Triple H and Stephanie not wanting her around.

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Reed

Reed

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I also loved how Eva Marie's family showed more charisma and personality in four or five minutes than Eva Marie has in her whole WWE run.

 

The dad, in particular, is fantastic. He was like the anti-Daniel Bryan: "No! No! Nooooooooooo!"

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piranesi

piranesi

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I also loved how Eva Marie's family showed more charisma and personality in four or five minutes than Eva Marie has in her whole WWE run.

 

The dad, in particular, is fantastic. He was like the anti-Daniel Bryan: "No! No! Nooooooooooo!"

 

 

The mom was crazy.  All quiet and then goer the farthest with like super insane ultimatums and mood swings:

 

"If you get a divorce you can never set foot in this house again

Oh, PLEASE DON'T LEAVE

YOU'RE DEAD TO ME

I miss you so much"

 

Also, just about any dude looks like shit compared to Bryan.  Goddamn, he knows how to play that schmaltzy romance game with a straight face.  It's almost like he's....into it!?  Dude was like a cribbing from hallmark cards tucked in his cuffs or something.

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Reed

Reed

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Bryan's speech and Brie's reaction would have been lovely, romantic and sweet if, you know, there hadn't been an entire frigging camera crew there.

 

How I keep imagining it went:

 

Daniel: Brie, you're my life. You complete me. I never knew happiness till I met you. I love you...

 

Director: CUT! Sorry, lighting is all wrong. Where the fuck is the lighting guy?

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piranesi

piranesi

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I think Eva Marie's family kinda turned her face alittle. At the very least it made her sympathetic.

 

 

They did seem to suckle off of the opportunity to be outraged.  Like it's their favorite family activity.  It was like an emotional feeding frenzy once they all decided as a pack that they were going to be the victims.  Anyone's going to pick up some bad habits from growing up in that.

 

Bottom line: Run, slightly-larger-Dom-Irrera, Run!

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piranesi

piranesi

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From the fiance's website:

 

"He has one goal and one goal only, to forever destroy the current concept of what it is to be fit."

 

 

I hate to tell him, but I'm almost certain I've already done that.

 

"and one goal only" always sounds like such a stupid turn of phrase.  Like he's defiantly unwilling to achieve two things.  Because that first thing is so important, like, to the protein shake industry.  He wants to make sure you know he'll never be distracted by a second goal in life. 

 

Like, if Brie ever asks him "So, what do you want to do for Christmas?  We could try ice skating or>>>>BABE, WHAT PART OF AND ONE GOAL ONLY DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND..GOD! IT'S LIKE EVERYONE IS WORKING WITH THE NORDITRAC EMPIRE TO DESTROY ME!!!!! AUGH ENERGY-BAR ME, BABE!!!!"

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piranesi

piranesi

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The cynical part of me says that at least some of Eva Marie's supposedly huge backstage heat is because she's not interested in dating anyone in the company due to being with this guy.

 

Whenever he's around he's probably a pretty big pest:

 

"Mega-shake?  Anyone? ANYONE WANT A HIT ON THIS MEGA-SHAKE???? Fine...more for me.  It'll help me with that one goal I have.

 

Hey, Orton...ORTON!!! Hey, have you ever considered that maybe your problem right now is that you have too many goals?  Have you ever even asked yourself how many is right number?  Would you be surprised to know that it's one and one only?"

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TheVileOne

TheVileOne

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He got her picture frames and candles and stuff though.

 

Also, Nikki is dating Cena and starring in an E! reality show.  She's freaking set now.  She may be making "sacrifices" but it's exploded her career.

 

Yeah, but look at Mickie James' predicament of how dating Cena is a double-edged sword. He decides one day he doesn't want to be with her, and maybe it's too awkward to have her around, she's screwed.

 

That's basically why Chyna was driven out too. She did want more cash and made wacky demands, but it essentially boiled down to Triple H and Stephanie not wanting her around.

 

 

Yeah but I mean, they already cut the Bellas and they are back.  Mickie was also with another guy when she had an affair with John right?  Nikki at least is living with him and despite and she can ride out this Total Divas gravy train until whenever E! says it's run its course.  By that time she can probably retire from pro wrestling and then make bank on appearances at conventions or Wizard World or whatever.

 

Also Eva Marie's fiancee did come off like a major douche for meeting his future bride's parents in a hoodie with no shirt.  You don't have to wear a suit, but put a shirt on dude.  Also you have to ask for the blessing before you propose.  So don't ask for a blessing at that point, just announce it.

 

Now playing devil's advocate, producers probably set a lot of that up.

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Reggie20x6

Reggie20x6

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Gosh you guys don't understand the Crossfit life, you do things just because you can! (see kipping pullups).

 

9jqi2x.gif

 

 

 

I love the fact that one of Nikki's friends, who has probably never met Cena, quickly figures out that he is very much a politician in every answer he gives. It was the polite way of saying "this guy is a f*cking robot."

 

It's also why he's the absolute face of the company - the man cannot be flustered, even with ten angry ex-Hooters waitresses grilling him.

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Big Fresh

Big Fresh

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Cena was great in that scene. But allow me to defend his robot-ness for a moment. I'm also a guy who doesn't want kids. And when you make that known, you get asked "Why?" at least once a day. I imagine it's a hell of a lot more for Cena even. So he's had plenty of chances to perfect his answer.

Eva Marie's Mom saying, "If you get a divorce, you'll never step foot in this house again" was worse than anything her Dad or brothers said. Actually, I can't imagine a much worse thing a parent could say. Fuck her.

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