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FUCK YOU - TV & Movie Edition.


J.T.

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Fuck you, Disney.  I think that one of the hardest things I have ever had to do as a father was explain to my six year old daughter why Bambi couldn't find his mother's body after she'd been killed by a hunter.

 

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Natural let hate into his heart with Shia Lebeouf. Now it's slowly spreading. Soon he'll stop responding to people with "Cheers!" and positive messages of agreement. Instead he'll only shout people down with phrases like "Suck it" or "Your mom!" 

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Natural let hate into his heart with Shia Lebeouf. Now it's slowly spreading. Soon he'll stop responding to people with "Cheers!" and positive messages of agreement. Instead he'll only shout people down with phrases like "Suck it" or "Your mom!" 

 

I, for one, will welcome our "Cheers to your mom s***ing it!" overlord.

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Natural let hate into his heart with Shia Lebeouf. Now it's slowly spreading. Soon he'll stop responding to people with "Cheers!" and positive messages of agreement. Instead he'll only shout people down with phrases like "Suck it" or "Your mom!" 

 

So Victator is some sort of time traveling future version of The Natural?  Awesome.  Just kidding Vic, much love brah.

 

Fuck You season six of Lost.  You took so much that was good and ruined it forever.  Ruiner.

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FUCK MTV. It's not about the videos. I want to see concert specials and MTV News with Kurt Loder, you fucks.

  No Tabitha Soren, no peace. Choose or Lose, Motherfuckers!
Is she still married to Moneyball Michael Lewis?
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Fuck You season six of Lost.  You took so much that was good and ruined it forever.  Ruiner.

 

 

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"But it makes total sense that I'm suddenly here with a whole fortress full of people you've never seen or heard from or about before and I'm sure you care deeply about what happens to me

 

...also Sayid is, like, a Zombie now maybe?"

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FUCK YOU LOVE AND HIP-HOP ATLANTA.  YOU'RE SETTING US BACK 50 YEARS WITH YOUR BULLSHIT.

Mama Dee doesn't approve of this post.

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VH1: Making Black People Look Buffoonish Since 2006

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Fuck you Netflix for losing Father Ted on streaming (though I guess you're making up for it with Peep Show).

Fuck you $150/month cable bill.

Fuck you Jim Jarmusch, and fuck the ending to Broken Flowers.  Pretentious hipster bullshit.

Fuck you Fox, just because.

Fuck you Tyler Perry, again, just because.

Fuck you, Jamie Kennedy.  You're the least likeable person in standup comedy, a field teeming with the likes of Carlos Mencia, Daniel Tosh, and Russell Brand.

Fuck you, my 12th grade history teacher, for making us watch Pearl Harbor.  I still haven't forgiven you.

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But it makes total sense that I'm suddenly here with a whole fortress full of people you've never seen or heard from or about before and I'm sure you care deeply about what happens to me

 

 

That's how I felt about Desmond at the start of season 2!  Hey we made up this new character, get ready for some fireworks!

 

Also: fuck you to my lack of free time preventing me from watching this apparently fantastic third episode of Orange Is The New Black.

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Desmond proved to be awesome. Doogan...not so much.

EDIT: Also the hatch was a big part of the end of season 1. The Temple was something that, IIRC, got mentioned once in a throwaway line at the end of season...3, I think. Whichever season ended with them getting the walkie talkie and waiting for rescue.

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Desmond, though, was part of a mystery that had been previously set up.  He was, in a sense, "what was in the hatch" (along with some other stuff, yeah).  I mean, anyone being in there was going to be new.  Hell, we met Desmond before we met Ben!

 

The new people in season six came out of thin air...not just the people, but the place and the function.

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Desmond, though, was part of a mystery that had been previously set up.  He was, in a sense, "what was in the hatch" (along with some other stuff, yeah).  I mean, anyone being in there was going to be new.  Hell, we met Desmond before we met Ben!

 

The new people in season six came out of thin air...not just the people, but the place and the function.

That was Lost in a nutshell though. No-one had a fucking clue what they were doing, Lindelhof has destroyed pretty much everything he's got his twisted bald headed claws into since as well.

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I'll give a big FUCK YOU to the cliffhanger of the first season of Wilfred, arguably one of the better mindfuck finishes I'd ever seen which was resolved by a big season 2 opener of "yeah, we don't know how to follow that up either, so, uh, never mind." Which was made worse since the season 2 opener aired on a random night other than the premiere and I had to literally track it down to see what happened.  And then wished I hadn't.

 

And FUCK YOU to any future episodes of Homeland that end up at "The Cabin."  As incredibly implausible as it will be, it'll happen.

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I've always maintained a firm "come for the characters, but mind the plot" approach to Lost.

Fuck... uh... today I watched Branagh's Much Ado About Nothing and The Big Bird Cage, both of which were very good (although the latter was more than a little bewildering), so I actually don't have anything to complain about for once. Carry on.

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That was Lost in a nutshell though. No-one had a fucking clue what they were doing, Lindelhof has destroyed pretty much everything he's got his twisted bald headed claws into since as well.

 

Wait, his claws are bald-headed?

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That was Lost in a nutshell though. No-one had a fucking clue what they were doing, Lindelhof has destroyed pretty much everything he's got his twisted bald headed claws into since as well.

 

Wait, his claws are bald-headed?

 

No he's bald headed, and his claws are a part of him. I had to specify his baldness because I'm fairly certain it's why he's such a shit writer.

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That was Lost in a nutshell though. No-one had a fucking clue what they were doing, Lindelhof has destroyed pretty much everything he's got his twisted bald headed claws into since as well.

 

Wait, his claws are bald-headed?

 

No he's bald headed, and his claws are a part of him. I had to specify his baldness because I'm fairly certain it's why he's such a shit writer.

 

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