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DIRTSHEETZ~! THREAD


RIPPA

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Well if anything good has come out of Dusty'S passing, it's that we learned Dave Meltzer'S son' best friend is named after Dusty.

 

And that Dave's son is indirectly named after Cody, per the Naylor show yesterday.

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  • 2 weeks later...

 

 

  • Stephanie McMahon was in Arlington, TX today, working the stadium officials in preparing for next year's WrestleMania.

 

I know that's just a standard Dave Typo, but I can just imagine Stephanie in a conference room with Jerry Jones and lying through her teeth, treating Jerry like an indy show money mark.

 

Jerry Jones: Ultimate Warrior, he's gonna be there, right.

 

Stephanie: You bet, we're gonna have him and Hulk Hogan fight each other in a steel cage Match.

 

Jerry Jones: How about them Von Erichs?  Any of them still wrasslin'?

 

Stephanie: Oh yeah, we've booked Kerry & Dave in a Badstreet Match against Terry Gordy & Gino Hernandez.  Gary Hart and Kamala are going to do a run-in.

 

Jerry Jones: Awesome.  I loved Gary Hart.  He was that Arab fella who wore the towel on his head, right?

 

Stephanie: Yep.

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  • 4 weeks later...

Deadspin's shitty wrestling column brought in a shitty guest contributor this week....

 

.... Scott Keith

 

You can't make this stuff up

 

How many people will quit over that decision?

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I think he has a column with the Sporting news actually. . . .

 

Yeah I just found this out myself...I dunno, as much as we've mocked him here over the years, it's been like 15 years since I read anything by him...and as obnoxious as he was, maybe it's time to admit that jumping into the IWC in it's formative years doing TV recaps and somehow conning his way into being a "wrestling expert" with multiple books published is pretty fuckin' carny...

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The article also had one of the regular jackasses say Sasha is the best woman wrestler in the company "not related to Ric Flair" at which point I nearly burst a blood vessel.

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The article also had one of the regular jackasses say Sasha is the best woman wrestler in the company "not related to Ric Flair" at which point I nearly burst a blood vessel.

Charlotte is okay, but am I the only one who finds her to be stiff and unnatural in the ring?  Sasha looks like she was born in a wrestling ring, I remember her growing pains in NXT so I know she isn't a natural, but she currently looks like she's been wrestling for years.  Sasha gets it, she is a wrestler.  Charlotte isn't quite there, still looks like she's trying to be a wrestler.  Watching Charlotte is like watching a good Pee-Wee league player trying to do all the things he sees his favorite players do on TV.  He's the best player on the team, but you can see the seams of how he's trying to put together all of his skills.  Sasha is essentially a 5* recruit who is playing at a level that no one else on the team, league or maybe even the state is capable of playing.  Who knows who will be the best when all is said and done, but Sasha is at a much higher level right now.

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The article also had one of the regular jackasses say Sasha is the best woman wrestler in the company "not related to Ric Flair" at which point I nearly burst a blood vessel.

That's absurd. Nearly all of them might be related to Naitch. He's a Petri dish in alligator shoes.
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The article also had one of the regular jackasses say Sasha is the best woman wrestler in the company "not related to Ric Flair" at which point I nearly burst a blood vessel.

Charlotte is okay, but am I the only one who finds her to be stiff and unnatural in the ring?

No, you're not. Sometimes I think it is because she is so yall, she seems a little awkward, like when she chops people.

Other times, like the Nattie match, she does things like forget how to sell a figure four.

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What the hell is wrong with the guy doing the Raw recap for the Observer/F4W? His name's Jeff Hamlin, and he's doing the impossible: making me long for the hallowed days when Todd Martin was the Raw recapper. Hamlin's the type of reviewer who spends most of his writeup whining about how the show is doing nothing right and how nobody's over.

But, worst of all: what the fuck is the deal with his obsessive/compulsive gimmick of rating EVERYONE ON THE SHOW in terms of how big/what kind of a star they are? Whenever anyone is mentioned for the first time, Hamlin puts in a little note (in parentheses) describing when or how he thinks they got over. Some of this is mystifying code talk; the annotation "50/50" appears over and over. I assume that's a reference to the even-steven booking in the midcard, but it would be nice if the writing itself ever gave any clue as to what the hell it's supposed to mean. Ditto with classifying several performers as "Cena Program", which includes people that Cena hasn't wrestled in over a year.

He also gushes about how great the Taker/Lesnar segment was, then spends the rest of the recap bitching and moaning about the company not pushing or creating new stars, never seeing the logical disconnect of himself praising the work of the old guys harder than all these young rookies he supposedly wants to see on top. The whole writeup is just one long mess that's trying to look inside-baseball but comes off as whiny, pessimistic, nitpicky, humorless, and is generally everything that grumpy old wrestlers are thinking about when they bitch about internet marks not knowing anything about the business.

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