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JAN 2014 WRESTLING DISCUSSION REBOOT THREAD


RIPPA

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Bink, go to reddit for five minutes and get back to me

 

Oh, those people. 

 

But really, on the whole, there seems to be something a bit more positive about the Daniel Bryan thing than there ever was with Punk.  Chanting for Punk was like saying FUCK YOU TO THE MAN, where the YES chants have this vibe that people really just think Bryan should be at the top of the card because they love him.

 

Mind you, I like both Bryan and Punk and avoid most wrestling fan sites like the plague.  I swore them off after WMXX, when I stood there dumbfounded as Benoit won the title in a match I shit all over and enjoyed not one bit because I was so convinced that the great HHH BURIAL!!!!!! was about to occur. 

 

Or at least that's how I remember it happening, it was probably something much less dramatic.

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Scotty Goldman showing up to wrestle Orton for the right to get CM Punk's job back and them re-doing the Rhodes Brothers angle from September-October with the Second City Saints you know would be fun.

Except in this version, Orton RKOs him after five minutes, then puts a CM Punk facemask on him and punts him into obscurity.

 

Also, Ryback eats Punk's contract.

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As long as the poop contract can still be valid I'm on board so far

Two weeks later we get a filmed segment of somebody digging through a septic tank, till Colt emerges, with the contract in hand.

 

As he gets out of the septic tank, he is promptly run over by Ryback in an ATV.

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You know...Bad News Barrett should've been there when Rey came out at #30 to announce Bryan wouldn't be in the Rumble and he should be there on Monday to break the bad news about Punk leaving.

 

At least then, you're putting over a heel that's not Steph or HHH.

 

He can even be the spokesman for the Authority or something. The guy that says stuff like "I have some bad news...Daniel Bryan will not be winning at Elimination Chamber. Enjoy Randy Orton vs Batista at Wrestlemania" to rustle some jimmies.

 

I dunno. Just a thought.

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I look at the difference between Punk and Bryant fandom like this --

Punk is exactly that. He's wrestling's version of The Clash. He has diversity in his styles of wrestling (face/heel/submission/striker/etc.). He's loud and abrasive and wants to be the big deal. His early WWE tenure was the first album -- pretty brilliant, with a string of great hits (White Man In Hammersmith Palais/Happy Birthday to Rey's Daughter). London Calling/The Pipebomb was a call-to-arms. It exploded on the scene and made him a huge deal for a while. The Clash headlined Shea Stadium. Punk had the Chicago PPV.  Punk's post-title run has been his Sandinista -- a bunch of good stuff (Lesnar and Heyman ='s Police On My Back) but a lot of a sprawling mess (Ryback, Curtis Axel, etc.). Now we could be seeing Punk enter his Cut The Crap phase, that's better off forgotten but might have a This Is England moment.

Bryan could be Nirvana. The Aberdeen, Washington comparison is spot-on. Kurt Cobain was a big indie dude before Nirvana blew through the roof. He was really into K Records, which was super twee and featured Beat Happening. Bryan's friends with Kimya Dawson, who has released a lot of stuff on K Records. Both are supportive of very supportable political causes -- environmentalism, for starters. Bryan's just released Nevermind and it's starting to get airplay, but the payola-infested rock stations are still putting Guns'n'Roses and other boring rock star b.s. on the airwaves. (Nevermind was released in September '91. It didn't become number one until January.) There are a lot of people into the groundswell right now. Bryan's YES MOVEMENT is the right angle at the right time and really capturing something broader, just like Cobain really captured what was going on for a lot of alienated kids in the early 90s.

I hope the first part of my comparison comes true, and Bryan breaks out as an undeniable megastar and is the top guy. There are obviously a lot of parts to the Cobain comparison that I really, really, really hope don't happen so just ignore those.

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I had been wondering why I don't bother to express my opinions any more aaaaand there it is.

So let me get this straight... You WON'T be getting the network?

 

 

Honestly don't know if this is sarcastic or not, but:  No, not planning on it.

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So is did anything else come from the KENTA rumblings?

Are you that eager to see KENTA become Smackdown's #1 announcer and get squashed by Rusev on main event, while lusting after Aksana or one of the Total Divas?

 

I just want to see him get a shot somewhere else before NOAH finally bites the dust.  He's done everything he can.  I know exactly what to expect, but I'm hoping they would prove me wrong. 

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There are obviously a lot of parts to the Cobain comparison that I really, really, really hope don't happen so just ignore those.

 

will we get the Bella turning into a drugged-out Courtney Love? if so then i'm in.

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As long as the poop contract can still be valid I'm on board so far

Two weeks later we get a filmed segment of somebody digging through a septic tank, till Colt emerges, with the contract in hand.

As he gets out of the septic tank, he is promptly run over by Ryback in an ATV.

Doo doo is good for me and doo doo is good for you.

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He got a tryout for some reason

I knew that much. I was just wondering if there was an aftermath or follow up story.

Wasn't that like yesterday?

 

I read a dirtsheet thing earlier that said he "might" be working NXT tapings tonight. Which would seem a bit sudden if nothing else.

 

So he'll be in TNA by Thursday?

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