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JAN 2014 WRESTLING DISCUSSION REBOOT THREAD


RIPPA

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With Hogan out of doing anything physical at Mania, and Cena teaming with Hogan was a rumored plan for Cena at Mania, what does Cena do at the big show now? Could this be the year we finally get Cena/Taker?

I wonder what the "no physical activity" thing actually means. If he can come out and throw a few punches to rescue Cena from a beat down then he should be fine. I don't see the physical harm in that.

Maybe he's just in Cena's corner to even the odds if they go through with the rumored match against Bray Wyatt.

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I thought Hogan was so broke? Maybe that photo is for an upcoming eBay listing.

I think Hulk said that he's doing ok now.  He had enough endorsements and projects like American Gladiators to help out.  Not to mention all the TNA money.  Also, I'm sure he gets money anytime WWE does anything with his likeness.

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What the fuck is wrong with wrestling fans that makes them so different than other fans of other things? No one wants to see Jim McMahon carted back onto Soldier Field because they don't like Jay Culter. Or pay Ali to throw one more punch for the hell of it. But when it comes to wrestling, regardless of how immobile the guy is, fans still want to see them do something that no non-wrestler their age would even dare to fucking do.

 

 

Guess it is something I will never understand.

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The only promos after a while I couldn't sit through were the nWo stuff and a lot of the chant-a-long stuff in the WWE. That stuff was just such a snoooooooze after a while. I think the absolute worst stuff of that era might be Konan's nonsense. That dude sucked so much and was given like 15 minutes to ramble on before his boring match.

But I love some bad promos. I've spent hours of my life watching Scott Steiner's WCW steroid-era chain mail hat stuff with Buff Bagwell in his dumb hat while his freak crawls around like some weird bodybuilder's slave. I can't find my favorite promo of his. It's one where he talks about contract law because he supposedly owns Kimberly Paige for 30 days. "Diamond Dallas Page or should I call you Diamond Dallas Trash!" Whenever he mispronounces phenomenon is also amazing.

 

The greatest juxtaposition in promos though were the New Breed in 1987 NWA. That's my favorite gimmick of all-time. Some of those promos are great, with Chris Champion talking about the healing crystals on their space lab. But then Sean Royal will start by telling some momma jokes about Jim Cornette. The pairing of the great wrestling camp angle of time travelers combined with some lunkhead jock stumbling through the most generic wrestling promo nonsense is so great.

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What the fuck is wrong with wrestling fans that makes them so different than other fans of other things? No one wants to see Jim McMahon carted back onto Soldier Field because they don't like Jay Culter. Or pay Ali to throw one more punch for the hell of it. But when it comes to wrestling, regardless of how immobile the guy is, fans still want to see them do something that no non-wrestler their age would even dare to fucking do.

 

 

Guess it is something I will never understand.

This is a case where pro wrestling and sports analogies aren't really on par, because it's different to put Jim McMahon into a game where he might get killed by a blitzing linebacker, then trotting out Hogan in a completely controlled environment where he's in little to no physical danger.  A better analogy would be with the world of entertainment, like "No one wants to see Sean Connery back to help Indiana Jones one last time because they don't like Shia LaBouef" and in that sense it's completely wrong.  It's a nostalgia moment, nothing more, nothing less.  And when you're trying to convince a crowd full of twenty-somethings that two guys in spandex are really hitting each other, there's no better way than to trot out childhood heroes who remind them of when they used to watch it when they were little.

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What the fuck is wrong with wrestling fans that makes them so different than other fans of other things? No one wants to see Jim McMahon carted back onto Soldier Field because they don't like Jay Culter. Or pay Ali to throw one more punch for the hell of it. But when it comes to wrestling, regardless of how immobile the guy is, fans still want to see them do something that no non-wrestler their age would even dare to fucking do.

 

 

Guess it is something I will never understand.

 

Football fans tune in every Sunday and see at least 20-25 QB's better than Jim McMahon. Wrestling fans want to see a Hulk Hogan come back and give them something that they don't feel they are getting with today's wrestlers.

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I'm watching some Big Bad Booty Daddy stuff right now. He's surrounded by women in so many of these. What are their backstories?

Backstories? You're watching WCW.

 

 

I meant real life backstories. Like how many dubious life choices do you have to make before you end up clapping in a wrestling ring as Scott Steiner mush mouths a bunch of words that essentially refer to you as trash?

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I'm watching some Big Bad Booty Daddy stuff right now. He's surrounded by women in so many of these. What are their backstories?

Backstories? You're watching WCW.

 

I meant real life backstories. Like how many dubious life choices do you have to make before you end up clapping in a wrestling ring as Scott Steiner mush mouths a bunch of words that essentially refer to you as trash?

I'm guessing they came from the same places as the Godfather's hos....so, strip clubs, I presume.

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