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Raw Is Selfies (16 Dec 2013)


Dolfan in NYC

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JBL bringing up Paul Wall and Mystikal kinda blew my mind. That hoss match was fucking great, though Swaggs should've yelled out "BOOMER SOONER!" before trying to bum-rush Henry only to get killed. The main was FIRE even with the DQ finish. Divas match was nothing, but damn did that Bella eat that kick.

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I liked JBL enthusiastically making a Harry Potter reference and then trying to cover when the other guys didn't get it:

He looks like Hagrid.

Who?

Um...you know,...um...that witchcraft show.

Sure, dude, sure.  That "witchcraft show"...not the collector's edition hardcover book series you have sitting on your bookshelf with a mini-spot on it.

 

I almost felt bad for him.  He wants to talk about it soooooo hard...but he can't take the risk of bringing it up.  Then he loses himself for a second and puts himself out there...and he gets slapped down hard.

 

 

I think Cole just doesn't watch movies. I remember him making fun of Josh Matthews for knowing who Black Widow is. A character in the third highest grossing film of all time.

 

or Vince doesn't

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I gotta work, so I can't watch it live, but I hope Santa brings me some good pictures of AJ dressed as an elf next week. I gotta feeling that's gonna be awesome.

 

The Wrestling Observer recap says Abigail was revealed to be the rocking chair. They should give it a backstory, like it's possessing the soul of the Wyatts' mother or grandmother, or something, or used to belong to one of them and that was her name, etc.

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Agreed on the praise for Orton/Bryan, might've been my favorite match of theirs yet.. definitely felt it was better than all of their PPV matches on first view at least. Didn't expect it to get so much time and wasn't hurt much by the finish. Interesting tag-heavy show tonight, Langston/Henry vs Real Americans getting 15 minutes was a nice surprise and a good tag. Tamina's kick on Nikki looked killer for sure. Opening tag was fun too. The commentary selfie was hilariously random.

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Nikki ate the kick. And posted a pic of a blood-stained towel on twitter.

You knew it was bad when she didn't take her hand off her mouth after the Shining Wizard and during the pin. It was nasty.

758592da66ce11e3b9690ebf72abb9ed_8.jpg

Tho I did like the set up to the kick..

"Don't be gross ... don't be gross ... don't be gross ..."

/internal monologue

(Resistance is painful.)

 

 

Daniel Bryan celebrates another month of not being a father.

 

THANK YOU!!!

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Nikki ate the kick. And posted a pic of a blood-stained towel on twitter.

You knew it was bad when she didn't take her hand off her mouth after the Shining Wizard and during the pin. It was nasty.

758592da66ce11e3b9690ebf72abb9ed_8.jpg

Tho I did like the set up to the kick..

"Don't be gross ... don't be gross ... don't be gross ..."

/internal monologue

(Resistance is painful.)

 

 

Daniel Bryan celebrates another month of not being a father.

 

THANK YOU!!!

 

 

Close, but...  Wrong Bella.

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Shawn Michaels is pretty awesome. He saved that Punk segment from being tiresome. 

 

I think the Mark Henry/Big E tag team should have the backstory of Big E being Mizzark's long-lost son. I want vignettes where they play catch together and have contests to see how far they can throw Smart Cars and break the bells on the strength games at various county fairs to make up for lost time. 

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I think the Mark Henry/Big E tag team should have the backstory of Big E being Mizzark's long-lost son. I want vignettes where they play catch together and have contests to see how far they can throw Smart Cars and break the bells at various county fairs to make up for lost time.

And then Mark Henry introduces Big E to his half-brother?

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I merged the two threads.

 

I sadly was amused when I saw someone on Twitter suggest that Show/Mysterio should be called "Fat Man and Little Boy"

 

I think we agreed that if Dean watched the WWE - Langston/Henry vs. The Real Americans would be his favorite match of all time.

 

Like MadCap mentioned - Swagger legit being the "weakest" person in that tag match is kinda crazy to think about.

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I'm fully aware that WWE fandom is an abusive relationship and the occasional Daniel Bryan push is the proverbial bouquet of flowers and "I'm Sorry" note.

 

That being said, if they wanted Bryan completely out of the title picture, Orton would have just beaten him clean last night.

 

Sliver of hope.  Hell of a match, too.

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Randy Orton is not my favorite worker, but the chicken shit douchebag offense really works for me.  There is no better way to make Bryan's moves look like a million dollars than using cheap tactics like hair pulling, eye gouges, and biting to provide escapes. 

 

It just screams, "This guy is too good for me to fuck around with." It is a heel's best way to show respect without actually being respectful.  Orton finally gets his role.

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