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DECEMBER WRESTLING CHIT CHAT


RIPPA

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I posted this on Facebook and thought it might be a good topic starter.

 

Something I just thought about. A huge thing missing from today's wrestling climate is the believability of the characters. For as long as I've been a fan, up until about 12-13 years ago, you always got the feeling that all of those dudes could kick your ass in a real fight. They didn't take any crap. Even lower card heels were presented as dudes that might get their tail kicked by the babyface, but they'd still kick yours.

Thats why it was so important to have managers, they could show that weakness for the guys so everyone looked strong. I'm not just talking about the monster guys like Barbarian, Andre, etc either. Dudes like Bret Hart, Tully, Arn, Haku were all seen as legit tough guys. Right now, there are too many guys that the average fan would look at and think "I could take him", and there is a good chance that they could. Before, if there was a guy that didn't come off like such a tough guy, like Honky Tonk Man or even early HBK, they made sure to go all the way with it, and use that to make you hate him even more.

I guess what I'm saying is that there are too many guys pretending to be bad dudes, instead of actually being one. That is why someone like Brock, Mark Henry, Langston, Reigns, Bully Ray or even James Storm are taken seriously. You know those guys would hand you your ass in a fight.

 

I agree with this. I'm not a big badass or anything but outside of the legit shooter guys on the roster, there aren't too many guys I don't think I'd have a decent chance against in a knock down drag out fight.

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Gee, I really hope this turns into another round of everyone arguing about whether or not Punk and Bryan are believably tough enough to be main eventers.

I hope not, because that's not what I was aiming at.  To be fair, I think Bryan is well trained enough to kick someone's ass.  I was thinking more along the lines of the guys that are presented as badasses or someone we're supposed to find believable, but obviously aren't. 

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I'm sick to death of every goddamn person acting like a "Mark Henry air bill" joke is still clever, original, or even remotely funny now (AH, yeah!  Mark said that once 18 months ago!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!- Fuck, type "Mark Henry Air Bill" in the search engine, you'll probably get an error 404 from the overkill) but goddamn if I wouldn't pay money to see Mark as Alec Baldwin in Glengarry Glen Ross.  Bad ass reference that came out of nowhere.  THAT'S how you make a Mark Henry joke.

Sounds like someone forgot to pay his air bill...

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I'm sick to death of every goddamn person acting like a "Mark Henry air bill" joke is still clever, original, or even remotely funny now (AH, yeah!  Mark said that once 18 months ago!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!- Fuck, type "Mark Henry Air Bill" in the search engine, you'll probably get an error 404 from the overkill) but goddamn if I wouldn't pay money to see Mark as Alec Baldwin in Glengarry Glen Ross.  Bad ass reference that came out of nowhere.  THAT'S how you make a Mark Henry joke.

Sounds like someone forgot to pay his air bill...

 

That's what he does.

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Gee, I really hope this turns into another round of everyone arguing about whether or not Punk and Bryan are believably tough enough to be main eventers.

I hope not, because that's not what I was aiming at.  To be fair, I think Bryan is well trained enough to kick someone's ass.  I was thinking more along the lines of the guys that are presented as badasses or someone we're supposed to find believable, but obviously aren't. 

 

 

Punk looks like a guy who could kick someone's ass in a bar fight. He's not all muscled up or anything but he just looks like a guy who'd bite your nose off or pull some other ridiculously terrible thing to win a fight. He looks scuzzy tough if that makes any sense. And I've met D-Bry and while he's a short guy, he's not super small next to an average person. He's built pretty well.

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Gee, I really hope this turns into another round of everyone arguing about whether or not Punk and Bryan are believably tough enough to be main eventers.

I hope not, because that's not what I was aiming at.  To be fair, I think Bryan is well trained enough to kick someone's ass.  I was thinking more along the lines of the guys that are presented as badasses or someone we're supposed to find believable, but obviously aren't. 

 

 

Punk looks like a guy who could kick someone's ass in a bar fight. He's not all muscled up or anything but he just looks like a guy who'd bite your nose off or pull some other ridiculously terrible thing to win a fight. He looks scuzzy tough if that makes any sense. And I've met D-Bry and while he's a short guy, he's not super small next to an average person. He's built pretty well.

 

CM Punk as Bobby Hill? I accept that.

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Gee, I really hope this turns into another round of everyone arguing about whether or not Punk and Bryan are believably tough enough to be main eventers.

I hope not, because that's not what I was aiming at.  To be fair, I think Bryan is well trained enough to kick someone's ass.  I was thinking more along the lines of the guys that are presented as badasses or someone we're supposed to find believable, but obviously aren't. 

 

 

Punk looks like a guy who could kick someone's ass in a bar fight. He's not all muscled up or anything but he just looks like a guy who'd bite your nose off or pull some other ridiculously terrible thing to win a fight. He looks scuzzy tough if that makes any sense. And I've met D-Bry and while he's a short guy, he's not super small next to an average person. He's built pretty well.

 

CM Punk as Bobby Hill? I accept that.

 

 

I see Punk as a Gribble type. Pocket sand!

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Gee, I really hope this turns into another round of everyone arguing about whether or not Punk and Bryan are believably tough enough to be main eventers.

I hope not, because that's not what I was aiming at.  To be fair, I think Bryan is well trained enough to kick someone's ass.  I was thinking more along the lines of the guys that are presented as badasses or someone we're supposed to find believable, but obviously aren't. 

 

 

Punk looks like a guy who could kick someone's ass in a bar fight. He's not all muscled up or anything but he just looks like a guy who'd bite your nose off or pull some other ridiculously terrible thing to win a fight. He looks scuzzy tough if that makes any sense. And I've met D-Bry and while he's a short guy, he's not super small next to an average person. He's built pretty well.

 

CM Punk as Bobby Hill? I accept that.

 

 

I see Punk as a Gribble type. Pocket sand!

 

I always felt like this is exactly how Corey Graves should be booked.

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I hate to break it to you guys, but most of the WWE roster could take the average person in a fight, just on cardio alone.

 

Except Miz.

 

Most fights are over in like 30 seconds so cardio doesn't mean anything.

 

 

Maybe those bar fights where people just wrestle each other to the ground. but I've seen plenty of fights that have gone over 30 seconds.

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Gee, I really hope this turns into another round of everyone arguing about whether or not Punk and Bryan are believably tough enough to be main eventers.

I hope not, because that's not what I was aiming at.  To be fair, I think Bryan is well trained enough to kick someone's ass.  I was thinking more along the lines of the guys that are presented as badasses or someone we're supposed to find believable, but obviously aren't. 

 

 

Punk looks like a guy who could kick someone's ass in a bar fight. He's not all muscled up or anything but he just looks like a guy who'd bite your nose off or pull some other ridiculously terrible thing to win a fight. He looks scuzzy tough if that makes any sense. And I've met D-Bry and while he's a short guy, he's not super small next to an average person. He's built pretty well.

 

Being good at bar fights is a skill that is wasted on CM Punk.

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I hate to break it to you guys, but most of the WWE roster could take the average person in a fight, just on cardio alone.

 

Except Miz.

 

Most fights are over in like 30 seconds so cardio doesn't mean anything.

 

 

Maybe those bar fights where people just wrestle each other to the ground. but I've seen plenty of fights that have gone over 30 seconds.

 

 Perhaps but I highly doubt cardio is the deciding factor in most fights unless you're in a controlled environment.

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I hate to break it to you guys, but most of the WWE roster could take the average person in a fight, just on cardio alone.

Except Miz.

Most fights are over in like 30 seconds so cardio doesn't mean anything.

Maybe those bar fights where people just wrestle each other to the ground. but I've seen plenty of fights that have gone over 30 seconds.

Perhaps but I highly doubt cardio is the deciding factor in most fights unless you're in a controlled environment.

I dunno, I was attacked by a guy who was floridly psychotic, but in such shape that a couple of whiff punches had him winded and incapable of carrying on.

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I hate to break it to you guys, but most of the WWE roster could take the average person in a fight, just on cardio alone.

Except Miz.

Most fights are over in like 30 seconds so cardio doesn't mean anything.

Maybe those bar fights where people just wrestle each other to the ground. but I've seen plenty of fights that have gone over 30 seconds.

Perhaps but I highly doubt cardio is the deciding factor in most fights unless you're in a controlled environment.

I dunno, I was attacked by a guy who was floridly psychotic, but in such shape that a couple of whiff punches had him winded and incapable of carrying on.

 

 

And this is what I'm talking about. In fights most people just try and punch you as hard as they possibly can, exerting tons of energy on punches they may or may not land. Tires someone out fast.

 

Anyway, any guesses on who Batista's first program is with?

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I usually challenge the other guy to throw a baseball at my chest.  And then I talk at him and get inside his head and he starts to get nervous cause everyone has gathered around to watch.  He usually misses and then we get to know each other and work it out.

 

And then we take turns with Max Patkin banging Susan Sarandon.

 

It's worked for me like three times.  By the way, Susan Sarandon is pretty slutty it turns out.

 

 

 

 

 

And Max Patkin is a goddamn stallion.

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