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Hoffman

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Everything posted by Hoffman

  1. Somewhere out there is an alternate universe where TL Hopper has been renowned for over two decades as the most electrifying man in sports entertainment, and Rocky Maivia was that one guy who came out to the ring with a plunger.
  2. According to Cyndi Lauper's memoir, Captain Chameleon was actually David Wolff, which would explain how those songs made their way to the WWF.
  3. He was the only person capable of uttering these five words: "Here is your winner, Meat!" with complete seriousness and sincerity.
  4. The 1910s were the last decade that the Yankees didn't reach the World Series. It was also the last decade that no New York team won it all. Just in case anyone's rooting for history to be made, or broken, or whatever.
  5. Some in the Crown Jewel image look thrilled to be there, others less so. Brock, on the other hand, seems genuinely mystified by the concept of having his photograph taken.
  6. Since the title can be defended anytime, the face plate should have been a clock, complete with hands moving hilariously fast around it. Either that, or a digital clock repeatedly blinking 12:00.
  7. I did that with my Hasbro figures. I had a nice, long-running feud between Repo Man and Kona Crush versus Demolition Smash and Crush where they swapped the tag team titles multiple times. When Ax would get involved, I'd toss in Ultimate Warrior to even things up in six-man matches.
  8. Those four actually were my Hasbro version of the Four Horsemen. Then Razor and Shawn left the group and aligned themselves with Marty Jannetty and Virgil while they feuded with the revamped Horsemen of Flair, Hennig, Greg Valentine, and Rick Rude. Virgil might stand out there, but his figure was pretty sturdy and he was my World champion on at least one occasion.
  9. This has nothing to do with naming rights, but I spent a week in Chicago this past summer and went to a Cubs-Padres game at Wrigley, a White Sox-Royals game at the Sox park, and three Chicago Dogs minor league games in Rosemont. I must have met as many actual Dogs fans than White Sox fans. Guaranteed Rate Field that afternoon was pretty much a place where a Cardinals fan like me could meet fans of the Cubs, Yankees, Red Sox, Brewers, and even an occasional Royals fan, take in a major league game for cheap, and no matter what our differences were, at least we could say we weren't White Sox fa
  10. It's probably a good thing Vader never got to run over Cactus with a Big Van, then.
  11. The Blues have fired Mike Yeo; assistant coach Craig Berube is now the interim head coach.
  12. Bald, pudgy Dean is that extremely dreaded uncle who would take up residence on your couch on Thanksgiving, and still be there come New Year's Day.
  13. I was amazed to see Steve Travis billed above Andre the Giant at that Brooklyn show. After looking him up, though, it's clear he deserved such prestige.
  14. Hey, the Hawks did what the Blues have yet to do: win a championship representing St. Louis. I like how we have more Super Bowl wins, NBA championships, and American League pennants than Stanley Cup victories.
  15. I think it was the year the Blues won the President's Trophy, then lost in the first round to the Sharks, that I realized the Blues would never win the Stanley Cup in my lifetime. Once that set in, I could learn to appreciate and enjoy the exciting ways they've found to shoot themselves in the foot each year. I'll always love the Blues and they'll never cease to entertain me, but I've got to be realistic here. A crippling final-week Blues defeat to the Blackhawks is just absurdly hilarious.
  16. Ah, there we go. Why wait for the playoffs for the Blues choke job we've come to expect?
  17. No, see, that was a brilliant performance. If the Blues choke during the regular season, they'll get it out of the system by the time the playoffs roll around. Lulling the rest of the division into a false sense of security, then BAM! Postseason success and the Stanley Cup. That's Lex Luthor in Superman II levels of scheming there. Or they just keep blowing games now and miss the playoffs entirely. Either way, it's the Blues. Best not to get my hopes up past the first round.
  18. They should repackage all of the misfit and weirdo wrestlers as Kurt Angle's various children and assorted relatives. The Angle Family can be the new Addams Family. A wild-eyed Kurt could spend the whole of Raw making bizarre announcements while blowing up electric trains. Plus, The Great Khali would make a perfect Lurch.
  19. It's definitely because of growing up in St. Louis watching Wrestling at the Chase, but I can never picture Brody as anything other than King Kong Brody, the rough-and-tumble babyface who loved the fans and went crazy only when he had to do so. Now Dick Murdoch, he was always pure evil. Comic evil, to be sure, but evil nonetheless.
  20. I also remember The Shadows on TV because of their intro: "from Parts Unknown, weight unknown." I thought it was great that they were so secretive about their identities, they refused to be weighed lest someone do the math and possibly figure out who they were.
  21. Rogers Hornsby did mellow later in life, but he was still very much disliked. When Bill Veeck fired him as St. Louis Browns manager in 1952, the Browns players gave Veeck a trophy to thank him.
  22. Trump did claim he would own the New York team in a third major league back in the late 1980s. I'm actually a bit more intrigued about Pia Zadora's then-husband owning the proposed Los Angeles club. http://www.nytimes.com/1989/08/17/sports/trump-says-he-ll-own-team-in-new-league.html
  23. It's precisely because both Dick and Sweetan were already plying their trade in St. Louis that Brody was renamed "King Kong" Brody here.
  24. He may not think much of Heath's kids, but at least Brock gives a shit about the censor's kids to keep food on their table for another week.
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