FluffSnackwell

Heard about The Burning Moon; I'm sure it's even been posted on YouTube a few times. My only exposure to Shittenbach was the awful Premutos: Lord of the Living Dead, which I blind bought based on its boast of over 100 kills, including a running onscreen meter. Seeing that one made me dubious of Shittenbach being able to make anything watchable. One of these days I'm sure I'll get drunk and bored enough with everything else to give The Burning Moon a go.

Ryback squashed a lot of people there for a spell too until he actually started going up against name competitors. Admittedly I still have to go back and watch the first 20 or so episodes of the show but I remember all the guys Pentagon was wrecking being on the par of Famous B or lower. You can do a copout badass build for anybody as long as you just feed them nothing but jobbers for three or four months. Sure, he broke Mil Muertes' arm but then what? What were Pentagon's signature wins during the show's entire run outside of beating Spampiro and winning the match for the title shot against Matanza? Meanwhile, a vanilla guy like Fenix beat Mil Muertes how many times, including his first defeat and a title win? It's not just strictly wins and losses either as Muertes has dropped plenty of falls but still remained a focal point and retained his aura throughout all three seasons. Besides losing, it seems like Pentagon has been underused on the show overall after the first season. Looking back, I'd almost rather Pentagon not been a part of the show at all so I would've had nothing major to be disappointed about because I've mostly liked the show otherwise. If other political dalliances weren't at play, then these guys clearly not understanding who their most popular interesting character was is strange. The idea of playing the long game or slow build with Pentagon doesn't work if he gets lapped by lesser acts while he's waiting his turn. Mundo's title reign itself wasn't the problem but rather it was preceded by Matanza's long reign ending with such a whimper when Pentagon going over at Ultima Lucha Dos would've been such a better payoff. Also the whole woman conquers all story is lame and hackneyed; furthermore, it was clearly done for nothing more than clickbait considering the worker and the abruptness of her title win and reign. They clearly just wanted to something to leak from the tapings to build buzz for Season 3. If they wanted to do something interesting, they would've found a female worker that actually looked like she could beat the shit out of guys. I don't know who fits that bill currently on the indies or in Lucha but that would've been cool. A woman (being given a cheap random title win) that works the same style as everybody else on the show, just unfathomably shitty at it, isn't interesting or groundbreaking.

I just wanted to blame the author of Chariots of the Gods somehow for LU's pending doom. The writers are the main deciding vote for who wins and loses or gets the belt next? I always figured Ian Hodgkinson being the master was some kind of inside joke and he was actually the head booker. Explains a lot. Hard to book consistently when you're intoxicated from McRib glaze. Probably some Smackdown retread scrub is the man, right? Some hack who learned never listen to the fans and always stick to whatever arbitrary pecking order they jotted down on their sanitary taint wipe.

Fuck showrunner Erik Von Danniken and his precious slavish devotion to seeing through his little creations through their character arcs while putting Pentagon on the backburner when they weren't busy outright embarrassing him. He could've been their Stone Cold, he should've at the very least been their Taz, instead he was their Eric Cartman; "he's a dick and he always get his because he had it coming; what a cool twist that piece of shit characters who barely even appear on the show suddenly show up just to beat Pentagon or get their payback." Nothing against Johnny Mundo and his epic run as chickenshit heel champ but the belt also became just another prop once Matanza lost to a random flippy move in the middle of Aztec Warfare III, after all that build.

Thursday, October 12 Carolina Sunday, October 15 New England Atlanta Baltimore Houston Green Bay New Orleans Washington Tampa Bay Jacksonville Kansas City Oakland Denver Monday, October 16 Indianapolis Tiebreaker #1: Winning margin in NYG/Den-10 Tiebreaker #2: Kevin Hogan passing yards-144 Tiebreaker #3: Miami Dolphin turnovers-4

It's been a long time since I've seen Tokyo Gore Police but I remember it being way too over the top to be shaken by its violence. Most if not all the kills in the Hatchet franchise are presented in the same way. I mean the kills in Tokyo Gore Police were more graphic than the ones in Hatchet but I don't remember any of the violence looking remotely plausible or realistic enough to make me wince. Like I said, it's been a while though. The only kill that stuck in my head is the one where the lady that's a crocodile below the waist eats men.

Oh yeah, without a doubt. I actually figured it went back much further than that.

For as much as The Hills Have Eyes is a brutal offspring of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and all of its baser more primal instincts, it’s Tourist Trap that is the spiritual descendant/sibling of the original TCM in terms of capturing that whole surreal “kids stumbling into a nightmarish pocket of hell on Earth in the middle of nowhere” vibe. The look of Davey even brings to mind Leatherface. Beyond that, I like to think that the setting of Slausen’s Lost Desert Oasis and Davey’s vaudevillainous antics inspired Hooper to pay it forward with Funhouse and then eventually the overall design and feel of ‘Namland in TCM 2. Slausen’s Oasis was certainly its own death trap, what with Old West displays perfectly capable of dispatching victims. Last but not least, there is a definite similarity between the endings.

Fucking Weedman. The owners might as well just drop a bowling ball from a cliff (or their skybox) down onto Kaepernick's outstretched throwing arm.

The Bucs must have offended the patron saint of kickers, Morten Andersen. Hell, 57-year old Morten Andersen could probably kick better than this.

Thursday, October 5 New England Sunday, October 8 NY Jets Cincinnati Detroit Indianapolis Miami LA Chargers Philadelphia Pittsburgh Seattle Baltimore Dallas Houston Monday, October 9 Chicago Tiebreaker #1: 44 Tiebreaker #2: 277 Tiebreaker #3: 5

Seamus's vulnerability to the sun makes it so he can't get enough of its vital rays essential for brain function.

I was hoping Enzo's show-ending Douche-A-Rama would be paid off with the debut of Asuka or even Pentagon Jr., coming from the crowd to "break" Enzo's arm and give him an excuse not to wrestle for another six weeks. I know the last one is an utter impossibility as Pentagon is locked in some ironclad contract that will see him jobbing to a collective of really bad ass 9-year old ghost girls whenever Lucha Underground season 4 rolls around some time in winter 2019. Braun should just powerslam all members of The Shield until their souls leave their bodies and the Undertaker's hand pops up through the ring to drag their bloodied, beaten, broken carcasses to hell.

Mike "Humanoid" Glennon? At least he's not Ryan Mallett. I mean that's the nicest thing we can say about him, right? As far as gawky stork looking motherfuckers that play that position go. Wait, I think Mallett beat the Steelers too. But he still didn't manage to fleece any sucker team out of 4 million per start.