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John E. Dynamite

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Everything posted by John E. Dynamite

  1. I know what you really want. I know what boys like, nyah nyah nyah nyah-nyah. I recently valuated my video game collection (TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS JESUS FUCKING CHRIST) and this little beauty has tripled in price the last three years, probably cause it's a brilliant mashup of the AKI engine and the ability to do awesome/stupid anime bullshit. If there was ever a game built for Kenny-ism, it's this.
  2. deleting this one. don't worry i'll turn it into a good post. u edit button
  3. Cody's theme song is just buttrock "Commando". FIFTH RULE IS: Don't bring your dog with you / SIXTH RULE IS: Go get a neck tattoo
  4. Makes sense. Stardom makes most of their money by charging their fans ¥10000 to breathe on the talent after the show.
  5. If only it were June, we could have the NJPW/CZW Best of the Best of the Super Juniors we've always silently begged for.
  6. JRPG =/= dialogue-light open world action/adventure games based on exploration, real-time combat and puzzle solving with no leveling or stats. Zelda is not a JRPG. It is, however, essential. The other exclusives I'll back up Bayonetta 2 (which I started recently, wow), Golf Story (which is ten times the JRPG Zelda is), Smash Bros Ultimate (really good single-player story mode), Super Mario Odyssey (an A- Mario game, which still smokes 99% of the field), the hilarious West of Loathing and the shockingly good Mario + Rabbids Kingdom Battle, which is super-cheap to pick up now. If anyone who does like JRPGs is reading, Fire Emblem and DQXI:S are wonderful, refined and bursting at the seams with content. Indies I've dug on Switch are Hollow Knight, Celeste, Sonic Mania, and Cave Story +. There's tons of others I'd be playing if I didn't have a huge retro backlog, but I've got my eye on Baba is You and either Dead Cells or Slay the Spire.
  7. Lancer Archer - a 42-year old midcard big man with personality & a newly-discovered knack for working as a base for Ospreay/Ibushi types in singles matches. His upside isn't exactly limitless but I can't imagine a better place for him than 10-minute Dynamite matches.
  8. Fury vs. Joshua, winner fights The Queen, legally obligated to kill her in one punch, Ascends to the Throne, this can't be that much worse than Brexit + will pop a sick buy. Do it or America will buy you in x years.
  9. Fury completely lost me when he let "Crazy" loop around. This isn't Michael Bisping and "Song 2". You have to make your entrance right around two-and-a-half minutes if you're gonna roll with classic cocktail-dress country, this is why you work this shit out in tech week.
  10. I relate to Paul Felder as much as any MMA fan with a degree in Acting (Acting!) is going to relate to him. The money's in broadcasting. Obviously. We've known how this goes since the days of Bas Rutten. He's also a natural 165'er/Moneyweight guy who could absolutely slip in to the BMF-belt chasing ranks of Marketable Action Fighters who Do Good Business (a growing market). I hope he doesn't retire, I hope he fights once a year and fights old guys in fun fights to pop ESPN ratings.
  11. I'm currently looking at my girlfriend (who never cared about wrestling before AEW) wearing her Orange Cassidy shirt, I'm not buying that casuals hate him for a second. Talking to people that don't follow current WWE but checked in to AEW, Orange Cassidy always comes up and it's always positive. I'm not denying or doubting that a casual could have a negative reaction to the gimmick, but speaking big-picture all my evidence is to the contrary.
  12. The great deal of confidence surrounding Orange Cassidy isn't just in the fact that his gimmick is as over as anything else on the show, it's that he was fucking Fire Ant and can work his ass off. It's that he has this enormous in-ring upside (at the very least as a tag team wrestler) and when the time comes to actually push the guy in a serious capacity and thereby pull back on the lazy gimmick, he's going to be zinging around the ring like a top-tier Quackenbush trainee. Which is going to be awesome.
  13. Hold off on the Arn turn until The Revival show up, pair them up immediately. The feud w/ The Elite is built-in. AEW's Big Guy roster is, well, bigger than people are giving credit. Hager, Luchasaurus, Wardlow, The Butcher, the quietly 6'6" Dustin, potentially more Jeff Cobb and the upcoming debuts of Brodie Lee and Brian Cage = a lot of proverbial and literal meat on the bone. Do you stick Brodie with a faction? I could see him rolling with the nebulously defined Darby & Mox alliance. The only heels that need that kind of muscle are Dark Order. He could join up after the big reveal happens, but it might play a little to close to his Wyatts shtick. Speaking of which, I have no clue what you do with Matt as I'm not a fan of the Exalted One buzz, I think it would run too close to the Broken stuff and make the whole angle the wrong kind of corny. The "Shawn Spears needs a tag partner" thing? Mentor of Madness for a Janela or Havoc? Maybe he could stand in opposition to the Dark Order as he's the only one who's loopy enough to match their mind games and could be a veteran presence to lead the jobbers they've targeted. You could mix Broken stuff with Mattitude-era guru skits.
  14. What is the lineage of The Flippiest Guy? Not "best flipper". Not "Wrestling Observer 'Best High Flyer' Winner". Specifically "flippiest guy". I've been trying to figure it out but the early days are disputable and the modern lineage of the "title" moves so fast... ??? -> Mando Guerrero invents the moonsault -> ??? -> Liger/Yamada invents the SSP -> 2 Cold Scorpio does the 450 a lot -> Did Rey Mysterio really flip enough??? -> I download clips of Dragon Kid's Dragonrana on realplayer -> Jack Evans does a double moonsault off a cage -> Yoshitsune happens for a week -> ??? -> Maybe we're just gonna stop at Ricochet I know I don't have the right pieces in the right order but I think right order is out there.
  15. There's also the fact that the WWE wouldn't let him call it the Bloody Sunday anymore. Always assumed 1916 was a compromise.
  16. It's a pretty misunderstood term, but "heavy" isn't in reference to the size of the villain, it's in reference to the size of the script. The big scary muscle isn't usually the baddest bad guy, it's the person hiding behind them who has way more lines than anyone else in the play. Most heavies aren't heavy. Go to the most recent run of AFI's Top Villains in the history of cinema and it's Hannibal Lecter, Norman Bates, the Wicked Witch, Mr. Potter, HAL, Linda Friggin' Blair. The only mentions in the Top 25 that are significantly larger than your average human are the shark from Jaws, the alien from Alien, and Arnold Schwarzenegger. I love monster heels. I love that pro wrestling is this larger-than-life thing where regular sized people have to get beat up / beat up gigantic people. But to think that gigantic = best isn't held up by the best examples within real life or fiction.
  17. This isn't the first Brain Stew ripoff. Bad music <3s good wrestling. Dustin's theme is knockoff Papa Roach, everybody
  18. The consensus greatest heavyweight boxer of all time had an ideal fighting weight of around 210-215. Prime Tyson would be able to enter Best of the Super Juniors. The majority of MMA all-time great heavyweights could have (or did) cut to 205. Really big guy = superior athlete is a myth.
  19. What blows me away about Riho is how she gets herself over in every match. The first three minutes of a Riho match usually involve the crowd not knowing how to react to a sub-100-lber's offense. The last three minutes tend to be the loudest reactions of the night. It's some of the most meaningful Underdog Pro Wrestling to happen on modern national stage.
  20. I'm going to state an uncomfortable truth here. Adam Page is not a drinker. He sips his beers like a polite high school girlfriend who is hanging out with your "field party" crew for the first time and is quite frankly concerned that you would associate with them.
  21. I think it's because Kong was supposed to go over as a (potentially transitional) heel champion awhile ago. And I think that was the plan at least up to the Riho/Statlander match that should have been great but wasn't.
  22. also Jeff Cobb in AEW = Dario Cueto is the Exalted One do it do it do iiiiiittt
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