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Gordlow

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Everything posted by Gordlow

  1. Dang! Almost everything that has been announced so far for this week's Dynamite feels like a showcase for that unique way AEW has of mixing ridiculous horseshit with truly excellent professional wrestling. And doing so in a variety of ways. Kenny and the Bucks are the all time masters and innovators when it comes to mixing ridiculous horseshit with truly excellent professional wrestling! And AEW stands for All ELITE Wrestling. So maybe THAT is the house style. Top Flight & AR Fox are IDEAL dance partners who can match Kenny, Matt, and Nick's creativity and athleticism. This match should be NUTS. Jamie Hayter is the hardest-hitting wrestler in AEW. Maybe third or fourth in the world (the competition being: MiSu, Ishii, WALTER in my opinion) The Bunny is GREAT but she's often primarily shtick in the ring. Will Hayter drag out Bunny's violent side? (We know it's there. She probably will) BUT: It's an Eliminator Match. We cannot completely dismiss the possibility that Bunny will steal a horseshit win so we can get a second (much more violent) match between the two! It's possible! The Acclaimed (C) vs The Gunns for the AEW World Tag Team Championship is LIKELY to lean more toward the horseshit side of things, for storytelling reasons, and the storytelling has been good enough that the outcome is actually in doubt! Plus, these guys can go, they keep improving, and they have developed great chemistry. MJF brings the old school heel horseshit and Konosuke Takeshita brings the athletic, hard-hitting wrestling to their AEW World Championship Eliminator Match. I hope either Soup or Bun Bun wins their Eliminator! I wouldn't mind a repeat of either match. The Garcia-Guevara Gauntlet is ABSOLUTELY gonna be showcase-level horseshit/wrestling mixture! With the first stage mostly the former and the second stage mostly (entirely?) the latter, I am assuming. Rush and Bryan Danielson bring the professional wrestling. TRENCH and Boudreaux bring the horseshit! It's gonna be TOO MUCH FUN!
  2. I am also not an action figure guy, but I have to admit that this new Jamie Hayter one looks AMAZING!
  3. Get well DEAN! Get electricity, John! I marked out for a bunch of non-actual-wrestling stuff today: TONY SAID "STOKED!" and he even emphasised it by pausing for a moment beforehand! DUSTIN ran in for the save, brandishing a TURNBUCKLE! The Mad King/HoB story kind of makes sense now. Corrupting the realest and least corruptible guy! I like it. RENEGADE TWINS!! I AGREE WITH JR! (About Emi vs Hayter). Rush using fat wads of cash to fan himself in picture in picture. Maybe the first time I have marked out more for the extracurriculars than for the in-ring action while watching an AEW show. I'm guessing Rush wouldn't get that reference.
  4. Elite vs Ethan Hardy Isiah. Which will absolutely be entertaining, and probably make me laugh out loud at least a couple of times. Saraya (boo) teaming with Toni Storm (yay) as part of the endlessly fascinating "does this division belong to AEW Originals or ex-WWE newcomers? " storyline that I love so much. Swerve vs Pillman Jr. (rather than Dustin or recovered - from - the - cinderblock - attack Keith Lee). Roooosh vs Christopher Daniels. To warm up Rush before Bryan or something? Rampage seems to be getting more YouTube - ish while Dynamite has been on a run of PPV-level matches. That probably sounds like a complaint, but if you know me at all you'll understand that I'm actually stoked that Rampage is getting weirder and more random. Who can say where our next semi-random totally great Hayter vs Emi type of matchup might come from? Likewise, I am already extraordinary stoked for Rush vs Dragon and Hayter vs Bunny next week on Dynamite. Predictably great is also great. I'm kinda stoked for Ibushi vs Takeshita and Golden Lovers vs Young Bucks even though neither has really even been hinted at yet. I think those matches are close to inevitable this year. Basically, this is me thinking about pro wrestling: t
  5. Blood before the first commercial break! THAT is how you start a big episode of prowrestling TV! YES!!! OUTRUNNERS!!! I ASKED FOR IT, I GOT IT!!! Takeshita to Cage: "I kneed you." Trios Title matches gonna be fun! BRYAN vs THATCHER! Oh baby! Starting out with a JOHNNY VALENTINE reference sets a pretty high bar! (Which they clear). TAKESOUP vs FRIEDMAN! Good heavens. No time to breathe. Is White Umaga's name "Trench"? Did I hear that correctly? Dragon vs Roosh?!?!?! Yowza. "That sounded a bit longer than 'we have a deal.' " Jade is Claudio-level STRONG. What an INSANE main event! WARDLOW! Dynamite today had enough action, and enough variety, for a PPV. GREAT show!
  6. Off to work so no time for a full write-up, but Workhorsemen and Magical Girl both on YouTube TWICE in one week feels like pure Gordlow Fan Service and I am VERY HAPPY about that. Also: Takeshita vs Angelico (w/Luther & Serpentico) was SUCH glorious bullshit and a PERFECT YouTube main event. I am off to work full of joy today.
  7. AEW is straight up doing weekly PPV quality cards now. Maybe I need to be grateful for Jeff Jarrett showing up! Weekly PPVs are kind of a Jarrett thing, right? Dragon vs Thatcher is a genuine DREAM MATCH. I am WAY more stoked for this than for Bryan vs MJF. Mox vs Hangman III is FOR SURE a PPV level bout and will be STIFF AS FUCK. Joe vs Darby... Ditto, plus insanity. Jade vs Velvet has been building for a long time. Takeshita vs Cage should be ALL ACTION and also innovative, for people who like that kind of thing. And Acclaimed "in action" (hopefully against Workhorsemen or Outrunners)! I prefer Acclaimed in the ring to Acclaimed doing skits by a WIDE margin, personally. Oh boy am I excited for tomorrow morning (our time).
  8. Starkz throws a very nice suplex! Athena & Diamante as partners who wanna fight should be fun. If I was booking AEW, Workhorsemen vs Dark Order would be main eventing Dynamite. I LIKE THE NEW MATCHING GEAR! The match more than lived up to my VERY high expectations! Roosh just absolutely demolished Pillman! Magical Girl! Hey. Whaddaya know? Athena & Diamante as partners who wanna fight each other WAS entertaining. Sakazaki LAYING IT IN was just great, too. Finish marked me right out! HEYYYYY I'M LIVIN' Top Flight vs Ari & Neece was RIDICULOUSLY nifty. If I am being honest, I enjoyed the goofy LET'S REMEMBER SOME GUYS NBA references on commentary ALMOST as much as I enjoyed the match. The Yuka/Dark Order skit KILLED me. I LOVE The Outrunners. Outrunners vs Workhorsemen and vs Bear Country and vs Gates of Agony please! WHAT A MAIN EVENT! They pulled out all the stops for Elevation #100. I was distracted throughout the show by the guy with the same facial hair as me in the loud shirt apparently mansplaining the entire show to his wife. What a patient woman. I hope he appreciates her.
  9. Happy birthday, Brocktopus, Spocktopus, Indian Death Locktopus... Hope you get a nice pic from Natural. You deserve one! @Octopusy
  10. That was a pretty darned entertaining Sports Entertainment Premium Live Event. I don't watch a ton of WWE, obviously, but that's the most I've enjoyed one of their shows since the Rumble where KANA and Shinsuke both won, whenever that was. A lot of pleasant surprises. Didn't lean too hard on nostalgia, camera work was relatively restrained, commentary was mostly solid... Nothing distracted from the action in the ring (except for the black lights glow in the dark stuff) and the action itself was all really good. Also: I saw the sign, and it opened up my eyes. I saw the sign:
  11. I was LITERALLY thinking, while watching Emi vs Hayter, that there was no way I could vote for anything other than the tribute match this week regardless of how good the Rampage main event turned out to be. At the risk of putting too fine a point on it: I appreciate your understanding that everyone feels the same way, and 100% support your choice to make this a vote for second place.
  12. 1) I think I'm gonna start calling her Emi SAKURABA. Good Lord. 2) "Those are heavy hands, ladies and gentlemen, take it from me..." - Good Ole Uh. How does JR have first-hand knowledge of how hard Emi Sakuraba hits? Oh geez. I thought about it for a minute and it took me to a dark place. Maybe don't think about it.
  13. There was some excellent camera work during the opener, particularly when Yuta came flying into the frame on that dive. In my opinion an avalanche Death Valley driver might be better used as a match-ender than a mid-match highspot, but I am old. Maybe that's also why I'd prefer not to lump Eddie Kingston in with HOB? Although possibly I'd still hate that if I was young. I enjoyed the classic ukulele based prowrestling psychology BECAUSE I am old. So it's not all downside. I also had a very nice pee during that match. And I was done in time to enjoy a bit of Satnam's shtick and Jericho's commentary. And that dumb, shitty finish! His name is Mudd! I enjoy a good squash. Swerve vs Dustin! Oh, baby! YES! THE QUEEN GETS THE MAIN EVENT! As is only right. Isn't it nice to have extremely high expectations for a match and then to have those expectations met? (It really is).
  14. I briefly panicked when I saw the DAZN announcement, thinking it was for all of Europe and Asia. But in fact it's for: Albania, Alderney, Armenia, Azerbaijan, Belarus, Bosnia Herzegovina, Bulgaria, Croatia, Cyprus, Czech Republic, Denmark, Estonia, Faroe Islands, Finland, Georgia, Gibraltar, Greece, Guernsey, Hungary, Iceland, Jan Mayen Islands, Jersey, Kazakhstan, Kyrgyzstan, Latvia, Lithuania, Malta, Montenegro, North Macedonia, Norway, Poland, Portugal, Republic of Moldova, Romania, Serbia, Slovakia, Slovenia, Svalbard, Sweden, Tajikistan, Turkey, Turkmenistan, Ukraine, Uzbekistan. That came as a relief. FITE's a way better deal for me at the moment. DAZN doesn't appear to be offering an AEW-only option like FITE does, and a DAZN subscription costs three times what a FITE AEW plus subscription does. Nice that my erstwhile American Football buddies in the Czech Republic will be able to watch AEW now. Most of them still watch the NFL, so most of them already subscribe to the service. I am curious how many people on here this affects. Sharty, certainly. Maybe Running From America? I think there's a connection to Bulgaria or maybe Hungary there?
  15. I will! Howzabout THIS to start?
  16. Actually, Tony Khan backward is Nahk ynot. Nah. K. Y not? Or... No. OK. Why not? Which is EXACTLY what a con man (Khan man!) would say to a rube before ripping him off! Coincidence? Yes. It's a coincidence.
  17. That was perfect. Hug somebody. Get well, DEAN!
  18. Hey Sammo~! I gave you the WRONG Jaguar vs Galactica match. Not that there is any such thing as a bad Jaguar match, as far as I can tell... but the one I gave you has absolutely AWFUL English-language commentary dubbed over it (though that might actually make it more interesting to write up, in some ways). Also it's not an apuestas match which makes my "Is this Joshi or Lucha?" "joke" (even) less funny. So, after I finish this write-up, I will also post a different, mask vs hair, no shitty English commentary Jaguar vs Galactica match. Feel free to choose. Kellett vs Czeslaw is one of my absolute favourite matches of all time. It's either The Greatest or Second Greatest Comedy Match of All Time (in my opinion) with Ebessan vs Kuishinbou Kamen 2 out of 3 falls the only real competition. It's almost certainly the greatest European comedy match ever. Ebessu vs Kuishin is the best from Japan. Maybe the Don't Spill Your Beer match or maybe Marella & Emma vs Summer & Fandango for North America? Anyway. It's a match I can watch again and again and find enjoyable every time. Even more so this time, as it's all on one file and the sound quality is much improved so I can get a few of the verbal jokes I missed the first dozen or so times I watched this. The main thing, though, is the superb timing of the physical comedy. Kellett is pro wrestling Buster Keaton. And Czeslaw is damn near his equal here. And the ref is every bit as crucial here as Matsui was in the Ebessan match. They make it look effortless. It's all funny, particularly the interactions with the ref, Kellett hiding behind the ring like a little boy trying to hide from trouble, Kellett and Czeslaw getting knotted up at the end of the first round and the seconds being unable to pry them apart before the start of the second... They "rake gag" a few jokes (Czeslaw's knee, Kellett almost vomiting...) to great comic effect. But it's also a really good European professional wrestling match. They don't do anything, in my opinion, that would violate the accepted laws of that Universe. It's an astonishing display of the Art of Wrestling. In a Desert Island scenario, this would undoubtedly be one of the ten matches I bring with me. Let's see: Kellett vs Czeslaw Ebessan vs Kuishinbo 6/9/95 Canadian Stampede Main Event Hokuto & Kandori vs Bull & Aja Tenta & Vader vs Albright & Yamazaki Andre & St. Claire vs Hoshino & Sekiguchi? Andre & Franz van Buyten &Ali Bey vs Rusher Kimura & Thunder Sugiyama & Isamu "The Carpenter" Teranishi? Maybe Kenny vs Ospreay? Bryan vs Hangman? Bryan vs MiSu! MiSu vs Ishii... It's VERY hard to just pick ten. But 100% Kellett vs Czeslaw. 100% that one. EDIT: Also: Thanks to EVERYONE who picked a match for me! I enjoyed every pick, a whole bunch. Great choices, every time.
  19. It's almost certainly a reference to Maeda shoot kicking Choshu in the face. About 3:20 into the video. Totally agree that it's the most interesting angle New Japan has run in ages (maybe ever?) and I also completely bought that things were out of control until the dropkick and suplex. Great stuff!
  20. 1) My life sure does not suck. 2) If your life sucks: Sorry! I am not trying to rub it in that my life aggressively does NOT suck. My intention is to share the joy. 3) 30 Rock taught us to never go to a second location with a hippie. Allow me to suggest that you should ALWAYS go to a second location with a Japanese professional wrestler. Hang on. I gotta switch browsers to post pictures. I'll spoiler them. Edit: A certain 8-tentacled poster did a nice thing and lightened up the pic of Dotonbori Pro wrestler Captain Amemura (who, rumour has it, really likes Takoyaki).
  21. Sammo~! In my opinion, this match is DEFINITELY one of those things. I'll leave it up to you to guess which one!
  22. Cage vs Mack and Action vs Garcia were both exciting matches of the gogogogo go go type style, with clean finishes. Hopefully some wrestling grandpas were upset that big men were working like little athletic guys. That's always fun, to read about. Schadenfreude, baybay! Darby vs Buddy and Brian vs Bryan are both matches I look forward to. JR kind of seemed to me, today, to be more like a guy doing a parody of a "grumpy out of touch rambling JR" but maybe that was just me. I'm going drinking with my wrestling buddies in Osaka tonight for the first time in a while. Hopefully I'll have some fun pictures to post later.
  23. Whoa! After Brian Cage and Willie Mack had an extra-fun Big Meaty Men Getting Their Shit In match on Dynamite, I asked for a Cage vs Mack Best of Seven... AND WE ARE GETTING A REMATCH ON RAMPAGE! YESSS! Those two big men match up very well, in my opinion. We are also getting: A Jade & Leila squash match! It's Jade's 50th match, I believe. Will Red Velvet show up? Action Andretti vs Daniel Garcia where if Garcia wins he takes Sammy's place tagging with Jericho so I am assuming Andretti wins because that's the more interesting story. I like that Andretti beat Jericho FIRST and now he's working his way through the JAS. It's a nice little twist on the usual way of doing things. And Jungle Boy vs All Ego. Will the mostly-on-YouTube and quite entertaining Ethan/Hardy Party story be continued here? I hope so! Also we'll get a Mad King promo or interview. I want him and Monkey to stay friends! I don't think they will, though. Him and Monkey fighting could be really good. So there's that.
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