piranesi

This thread is giving me a cruel craving for October. Football starts this Sunday and so does Futbol. So, we're like weeks away from the unofficial start of horror movie season. FUCKFUCKFUCK OHYEAH

Hey, you. Stop that right now. Don't you remember when FSW tweeted this:

Guys, Everybody go watch HALLOWEEN 5: THE REVENGE OF MICHAEL MEYERS right now so you can come back and post about how Fowler is the worst and Tina is the best, okay!!!?????

From the 25 Years of Terror doc. Wendy Kaplan horsing around with Danielle Harris during filming. It gives one of those "embedding not allowed things" but click through and tell me, does Fowler have a heart?: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f5w1ddLmhAY And is there anything more fun than young actors and filmmakers making a horror movie? Of all thei things I never did in my life, that's one of the ones I kind of feel wistful about. The enthusiasm and creativity of first-time directors and starry-eyed actors getting their first big role seems to be a driving force in a lot of my favorite all time horror movies...from TCM to FRIGHT NIGHT to HALLOWEEN and EVIL DEAD and GINGER SNAPS and on and on. It also helps that the low-quality footage looks like the opening scene in a found-footage horror movie on its own. I think this might have been posted on the old board just before it went down. A similar effect given how much Joss has blown up lately: I don't think there is anything I love more than behind the scenes footage from horror films. "Everyone has a heart...except for some people."

Please tell me you can tell me if they were ever in anything together. Their combined IMDB listings comrpise like 1,000 credits.

All that may be true, but it doesn't prevent her from being one of the very few characters in a horror film I have ever actively rooted for the death of. Holy fuck is she annoying. She is adorable and you are heartless: Evidence. Adorable, vulnerable and awesome Heartless, pitiless, and vulgar

Snuffy!!!!!! Not this guy: Note: Googling Snuffy Smith and then seeing Snuffy Smith made me suddenly smell my grandparents old house in East St. Louis. Yes...smell it...like musty and grandparenty. One of the things that always freaked me out is that they had a weird newspaper there with all the worst comics and none of the ones from the regular Post Dispatch. It was like Bizarro comics page...all the really old ones like Heathcliff instead of Garfield and Frank & Earnest and Gasoline Alley...FUCKING GASOLINE ALLEY!!!!! I'd read the comics there, and I'd have to be like, "Mom, what are war bonds and where do we get them? Belvedere says we need to buy them to stop the Huns!" And she'd be like "Don't read the newspaper when we're over here. Here, play with these hair nets. Pretend they're space amoebas or something."

Best parts: Bossman still manages to punch him in the kidney. That's presence of mind. Zach Galifinakis' brother and Edie McClurg are sitting next to each other in the second row, and are incensed.

Alex Riley: "Man, when I turn on Miz, I'm going to become a huge star!" "....oh..."

I love how his right boot is the last part to give up.

"Can you even believe someone thinks this is a "fail?"" "I know, right" - conversation between two Facial MRSA's

Every time I watch it I root for Wendy Kaplan (Tina) so much. She was given such a ridiculous job to do, having to carry most of the movie, in some scenes literally acting against a silent person...basically acting against a broomstick in her scenes with Michael, and against a mute child in her scenes with Danielle Harris, and against an inchoherent madman in her scenes with Pleasence. And she to somehow be both the sloppy, hapless, clueless dimwit and the (accidental) heroine who is the only one who can protect the girl...and she has to fail, like her character is written to fail, but somenow keep us invested in any of what is happening. That's a lot to put on a 20-year-old acting in like her third role. Give her a break, man!

The two best scenes he's ever directed were the two scenes in HALLOWEEN 2 where Daniell Harris, Brad Dourif, and Scout Taylor-Compton were just sitting around the kitchen table trying to be sort of normal, despite the fact that they are all basically wounded survivors of a horrible crime. It reminded me of those great domestic scenes Spielberg used to direct in, like JAWS, and the openig scenes of E.T., where you have this voyeuristic sense of seeing real people behave normally while having some dread hanging over them. Danielle Harris does such a great job in those scenes of projecting a kind of denial, pretending to be fine while we can see that she is clearly essentially a shut-in now afraid to leave her house. It's too bad the rest of the movie blows bubonic penis.

Indie musicians and standup comics seem to agree on its quality. If you trust the likes of such hippie scum...and Brian Poshen, I assume based on his shape.

Ihop?

This is the least Kung Fu thing ever written on this board. I can't reconcile those two posts one after another. I can only deal with them as a conversation between two different crazy old men.

This is the most Kung Fu thing ever written on this board. Something this guy would say: Before making you balance six wine jugs on your back while he goes back to study his gravy formula.

No. For some reason when I see sausage and gravy dispensers I feel like this is a good thing. I need one of those dispensers for my house. Just to be clear on this. This is a setup for a joke about your lacking a proper, functioning dispenser for the sausage gravy that you love and crave. People, I implore you.

Damn, I never imagined Andy being older than like 23. Like, Scott Pilgrim-aged, but American and therefore beefier and sort-of-rural and therefore droopier, like posture-wise. Maybe a few years older, like almost Gideon-aged where if he tried to mack on Ramona it would be way wrong, but Kim might still give him a whirl just to raise eyebrows. But, yeah. That raises some questions about Anne.

Bless you, SirFozzie. You can't believe the bizarre non-real hallucinations I've been having. There were hippies and poors and non-traditionals everywhere. And they were winning! Can you imagine such thing? Well I can. I've seen it in my Imagination brain. Imagination, man. It's a queer thing.

I still have exactly that same STAR WARS lunchbox that's just above his mac and in the Comicon pic. It's sitting in a box of junk my parents just sent me from my old room. PM me, Bautista, Brah! We're Box Bros!!! (None of the rest of you. I don't care what Vintage Boxes you bring to the table. This is between me and my Box Bro Big Dave!)

Fun, yes. Scary, no.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FC60L6DFMCM What IN THE HOLIEST OF FUCKS is this creature supposed to be? Man? Caveman? cyborg-Hipster-prototype? Treehugger? Tech Startup CEO? Tomorrow-person? Homeless Insane Cult Leader? Let's take stock: He is wearing a hoodie inside a sportcoat (with a pocket square that appears to double as a bandana). Over a dress shirt and tie, but the tie is both overly wide and comically short and also hanging loose around his neck. He is also wearing suspenders but they are HANGING DOWN AT HIS WAIST!!!!! And he insists on answering questions asked of him by bystanders SPEAKING ENGLISH by addressing them in rudimentary phrases of whatever-the-fuck language he decides they rightfully belong to based on skin color or eye shape. So he's super racist too, even though he seems to live on a street that might best be called "Little pan-asiatic-Mediterrania." He is, it seems, an amalgam of Ted Kascynski, Will Ferrell playing Ted Kascynski, Harpo Marx, Goa Gil, That guy who banged your girlfriend when she took that creative writing class at community college, a cirque du soleil unicyclist, Jesus, A guy playing Jesus in JESUS CHRIST SUPERSTAR, a dude they pulled right off the set from a Geico Caveman commercial, John Walker Lindh doing and impression of Brian Wilson (either the pitcher or the musician), any random guy working on the set of CADDYSHACK, That dude from Fleet Foxes, Lao-Tzu, Charles Manson as portrayed by Eric Stoltz, and Bill Hader. I mean, fuck.

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