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Akim and Rezar are huge and scary and cannot form a coherent sentence. Paul Ellering is a thousand years old and cannot cross the seal on the floor. Such is the price of immortality. Drake is hilarious to see with them becuase he's teeny tiny. Also he can put them over until the day they eventually rip in him two like the T-Rexes in whichever Jurassic Park that was.

Alicia Fox is blonde now? Time to push her to the moon.

The man keeps a pencil tucked behind his ear while using a laminated play sheet... maybe we shouldn't expect much.

Cheers, @Nice Guy Eddie.

Oh my goodness...

Is he supposed to be miming karate or "GET THESE TARANTULAS OFF MEEEE"?

I love how roughly every other year they have Mick cut a promo on the HIAC go home show, and he always does more in four minutes to get over the match than the entire multi-week build combined. Even as a shell of his former self on the stick, he's still better than literally everyone on RAW. Fuck, the best promos the last three weeks have been Triple H, HBK, Taker and Foley. That's not ideal.

It's such a massive difference watching Mick Foley cut a promo about being a referee versus pretty much everyone else on the roster. Like you can just picture some writer giving Foley a promo and him going "Yeah, I'll put my own spin on it" and throwing it away. It's like an actor from 'Breaking Bad' accidentally wandering away from the set, and delivering a monologue in the middle of 'Last Man Standing'.

Outside of the coaching warning, what exactly did the umpire do to be a dick? By the letter of the law, the coaching warning was correct, although bullshitty, since it is almost never called. Serena smashed her racqust for violation #2. Serena repeatly verbally abused the official, who finally had enough and gave her the third violation. I feel horrible for Osaka. She was winning that match, playing the match of her life, and her accomplishment will forever be overshadowed by Serena screaming at an umpire. I also feel bad for the official. He did his job, gave Serena a tremendous amount of leeway before issuing violation number three, and yet he has people who know nothing about tennis raking him over the coals.

Braun and Ziggler kind of remind me of these two

"I get older, they stay the same age...."

Those statements by the WTA and USTA are embarrassing.

It's funny. The few times Renee has done RAW I've barely noticed her, and yet, it's been a fucking massive improvement over Coach. He's still the worst

Meanwhile, I was just wondering why he put "tonic" before "gin"

Then he’d have half the eyes that you do.

Since someone will ask - these are from Dino Bravo/Dominic Denucci vs. Tank Patton/Golden Terror

Jonathan Coachman: "This might be an advantage for Ronda Rousey. It's allowing Ronda Rousey to get a little bit of a rest." as Nia Jax had Ronda Rousey in a bear hug at WWE Money in the Bank 2018. Fucking hell. Even Michael Cole and Corey Graves called Coach out on that. Coach sucks.

Nobody disrespects Terry Funk on #TerryTuesday, least of all Tommy Young

Nails it. Sad to see.

It's not whether or not I care more about what they have to say, it's that they are saying it better and with more passion than anyone on the current roster approaches. Possibly because they aren't heavily scripted. If WWE is going to insist on scripting they should really add actual acting classes to the Performance Center program. Not promo classes they won't be allowed to apply on main roster promos, but flat out college acting classes.

Dreamer always looked like a guy that came in asking for directions and was forced into wrestling a match somehow.

or why Drew and Braun want to hang out with fucking Dolph Ziggler

I missed the first hour being at the hospital with my grandmother. She was released, I got her prescriptions, and she's back home. I like how The Shield can come back when they're not in the swat gear. Roman's personalized swat gear is ok. That's the ultimate WWE logic. "Ok, The Shield are being kicked out of the arena and threatened to be arrested. How can we have them come back later in the show?" "Ummmm...they just come back wearing their WWE.shop.com merch?" "That's brilliant!" I was hoping Foley was going to ask Elias to see his guitar, then give him the El Kabong. Chad Gable needs his own Glorious robe. We know Roode is turning at some point, but I hope it's not rushed. I like Gable being overly enthusiastic about impressing Roode and getting the job done. I want vignettes with Lio Rush hyping up Lashley as he does everyday, mundane things: taking out the garbage, getting the mail, dropping off dry cleaning, picking up the kids from school, etc.

He’s also presumably still the 205 Live GM. You’re completely caught up. I am not exaggerating.

Cole doesn't need to be replaced he just needs someone to mute Vince's screaming in his ears. Free-range Cole is quite good.

I've seen maybe half a dozen NXT matches in my life. So, I thought for my next project I would go through all the TV and specials, starting from when it became the official developmental territory (since I have no interest in revisiting the reality show seasons). I'm looking forward to seeing the origins of some of the wrestlers I really love (such as Sasha, Rusev), and maybe getting a new perspective on some that I'm not too fond of (such as Alexa, Finn). And I will suffer through Seth Rollins. I wanna see the genesis of the Wyatt Family, why Paige is in important figure in the women's movement, and just how good the Revival actually are. I hope some of you will read along with me. 6/20/12 So this is the start of the new NXT, and we begin with Jim Ross coming out and introducing Dusty Rhodes as the interim GM. Dusty says it's going to be a great show and then Ross joins William Regal on commentary. Bo Dallas Vs Rick Victor: So, Rick Victor is Victor from The Ascension, right? They talk about him training in the dungeon. This is a Bo Dallas showcase. He gets a big promo package building him up, and then a post-match interview. I don't know who told him it was a good idea to use a spear as a finisher. He's basically a white-meat babyface here, and I can see why that didn't work. Next Damien Sandow comes out for a match with Jason Jordan (!), but deems Jordan unworthy competition. So he basically just cuts a promo and leaves. Young Jordan sighting is already making this project worthwhile. Kid looks jacked, but needs a haircut. The Ascension Vs CJ Parker and Mike Dalton: Alright, this is a treasure trove. First of all, I had no idea there was an Ascension before there was THE Ascension. The gimmick would get tweaked a bit over time. Come to think of it, I don't really know what the Ascension gimmick is. Post-apocalyptic cyber punks? Anyway, I'm all over wiki for this one. So that's Connor (or Konor or whatever), teaming with Kenneth Cameron. Kenneth Cameron was married to Charlotte. Interesting. Kenneth Cameron is from my home county! That's insane. He lives in Chesterfield! I've never known any wrestler to come from Derbyshire before. I love this. Is Mike Dalton Tyler Breeze? Why, yes it is. And CJ Parker is Juice Robinson. Awesome stuff. This is an Ascension squash. What else is going on? There's Bray Wyatt and Seth Rollins hype videos. Something in the back with Johnny Curtis and Derrick Bateman. And now it's main event time. Tyson Kidd Vs Michael McGillicutty: This main event is very Main Event, if you know what I mean. But that's okay, because I love watching Kidd work. This is a good match. They both work hard, and Kidd in particular, working as an exciting babyface, looks really good. Kidd picks up the submission win with the Dungeon Lock. Episode MVP: I have to give the nod to Kidd for his energetic all-action display. 3 star match: Tyson Kidd Vs Michael McGillicutty

Hiya~! Y'all have had your fun and I am starting to have time to think. So things I am going to be cracking down on around here (some of this is new, some of this is everyone just getting lax.) General point to remember - a lot of these are being asked due issues with load time and with error displays on the mobile version due to changes to the way media posts. 1) Stop with the Seinfeld posts. - Clearly this is directed at @Nice Guy Eddie and @PetrolCB the most but it is also short hand for just replying to topics with Youtube videos. (So not specific to just Seinfeld but I think everyone knows what I mean. Think of this like the Allen Houston Rule or maybe the Hiss Act). Once in a blue moon is fine but when I see it done 4 times on a single page, enough. Video that is relevant with a line or two of explanation is ideal. 2) If you feel the need to post more than one photo or GIF in a thread - please use spoiler tags. This will help with loading time. 2a) Tangential to this - whenever there is a picture gallery on another site (usually wwe.com) - a picture or two at max is fine. A link to the gallery can go with it! Not every single damn picture. @The Natural - Love ya but you are the biggest offender here. (A few people are running a close 2nd) 3) TRIM YOUR GOD DAMN QUOTE BOXES!!!! Especially when quoting multiple photos/GIFs) See this terrible example from @Pete Heck visit the GIF thread in general for a lot of bad practices. 4) I am going to do another couple of rounds of signature sweeps so don't be surprised if some or all of your signature vanishes. (Also if I discover broke images - I will delete those too.) 5) When using spoilers - putting a little note outside the box is super helpful so someone can figure out what it is about and then decide whether they should click on it or not 5a) Also - if you use the "View Unread Content" feature. YOU WILL NEED TO CHANGE YOUR SETTINGS TO AVOID SPOILERS!!! Default setting is expanded posts so all the posts are just out their naked as a jaybird. Use Condensed view and also just view topics not posts. 6) Reminder for folks who use the tiniest resolution on your monitors. Just because something looks tiny on your screen doesn't mean it will be tiny for everyone else. I am sure there is more since I am old and cranky but yeah...

Becky and Samoa Joe are national treasures.

He's quoting Billy Joel's Piano Man.

Apologies if these are too big. This guy is great.

Par for the course for Raw.

Thirding the VC Rotunda/o love. He was such a great jock dick head.

That reminds me exactly of that Bam Bam quote in the mediocre thread.

Owens also got to draw hardway(ish) blood by headbutting Vince, which should have been a huge deal, so the wheel-spinning is additionally frustrating.

I find it funny there was a very special Home Improvement planned about drunk driving that got scrapped when Tim Allen got arrested for drunk driving.

Please people, none of us want to imagine Dolph's mounting face. (My guess is probably that he takes a bump upon orgasm, though)

I am totally down with this month's thread focusing on Showa nastiness.

Whoever made the joke last week about Dolph sounding like a teenager on the Simpsons in comparison to Braun and Drew Mac was spot-on, btw. Turned the mute off just to make sure haha

Well, you see, there's a good explanation for that, which is WHO CARES DAMMIT! HAH HAH PAL! I LOVE HORNSWAGGLE MANAGING THE AOP! But yes, if you're looking for a reason for, well, anything, you're not going to find it. It's WWE. They can only aspire to be 5% as good as any storylines from BTE.

Phil Parent is porting his Fire Pro anthology over to PS4 but he seems to be working on lesser known names.

The first version of “Just Close Your Eyes” was awesome too.

So Chris Masters is coming to the Okanagan this weekend. I'm concerned because he was a total douchebag to me at the end of June...for no reason, as far as I can tell. I was down in Cloverdale at an All-Star show and introduced myself; I wasn't working the show but came down to support Tim Flowers (who was getting a HOF induction) and see my then-girlfriend, but I gave the standard info you give...where I'm from, that I'm a promoter in Kelowna, etc. He was polite enough AT the venue...however, there were rumblings that the Main Event had to be changed because he refused to work Tom Lawlor, one-on-one. Take that FWIW, as I wasn't eavesdropping on the booking side of things as it wasn't my show. Regardless, we got to the after-party venue. I showed up very late, because despite not being booked I stayed until the very end to make sure the ring was packed, venue tidy, etc. Not bragging, it's just what needs to be done. When I got to the after-party, I was tired...and then Masters shouldered by me at one point, like your stereotypical meathead at any bar. To make matters worse, outside where the workers were smoking weed, he shook hands with everyone before he left...EXCEPT me. Like, WTF? Anyway, here's a promo where I jokingly got my frustration out. I'll keep you posted if he's a cock this weekend...

So. Over the summer my 10 year old son requested that I take him to see SLENDER MAN. He doesn's like horror films and gets real squeemish. I'm pretty much alone when it comes to horror films at my house. But for some reason he wanted to see this one, probably because he's into all those horror kids games like Five Nights at Freddys. I didn't really care to see it, but I couldn't pass up this opportunity to take my son to his first scary movie. I was ecstatic to go as a father. We went, and it was...not absolute horrible. He also handled it well, and didn't get really scared. School started this week in Chicago, and on the first day of school he and another kid were talking about seeing the movie. Another kid jumped in and was like NO WAY THAT MOVIE IS TOO SCARY AND IT'S RATED R. My kid shut him down and was like it's PG13 and also not that scary. I was so goddamn happy when I heard this, you guys. He got to be the kid who did the older kid thing that the other kids were too scared to do and I facilitated that. Maybe the best moment in my parenting career. And I'm putting it here for all my fellow horror aficionados to celebrate.