| WELCOME TO DEATH VALLEY DRIVER VIDEO REVIEW #116! |
Hiya! This is quite the mixed bag- as we stay skeletal this time around as we anticipate the fabulous ALL LUCHA DVDVR in #117. Pete and Ray go back to the future with the WWF and the 91 All/ New Japan while Me and Phil say the FUTURE IS NOW- like a couple of grappling-addled George Allens- by showcasing the huge gaping swankness of BattlARTS and DDT.
Love it....
#$#$#$#$# DRAMATIC DREAM
TEAM 11/25/1999- handheld
(DEAN RASMUSSEN)
I'm KING of the motherfucking freaks
and quite proud to be so. I realized this when I noticed that I am
developing a grasp of spotting DDT and IWA Japan undercard wrestlers and
am now able to identify them with hardly any help. This is the THIRD
of the endless DDT reviews that will pepper this much-maligned and truly
beloved video review until the end of time- as DDT is becoming a
frontrunning promotion in the burgeoning Japanese Indie scene. Between
the DDT Proper cards, the total DDT permeation of any and all Onita Pro
cards, the recent forays into BattlARTS not to mention the presence in
the amazingly sleazy IWA Japan, It's easy to notice and be exposed to the
fact that DDT is the cusp of high-end Indie wrestling and most anything
with a large concentration of DDT regulars is a tape worth seeking out.
As for this particular DDT Proper Card, I was gonna write this last night
but I forgot that my wife's bookclub was chatting with an author, so I
just watched the DDT tape again and took some notes- which I never recommend
because you get all up into the "List Of Moves" style of review and analysis
which will putcha ta sleep PDQ, usually. These will be the basis
of what I write BUT YOU CAN GO RIGHT TO THE SOURCE
NOTES since I have a scanner and you can get closer to the bone and
we can creat a CYBER-BOND through the NEW TECHNOLOGY. I want TO TOUCH YOUR
PERFECT BODY WITH MY MIND. Yeah sure...
Diasaku/ Yasaku vs Tsunehito Naito/ Phantom Funakoshi: The hot ref is reffing and she will be Ray Duffy's childbride if there is a kind and loving God. Maybe it's the ponytail or the basketball jersey. She could use a couple sammiches for my taste, but the boys like her and think she is the bee's knees- so who am I to argue with someone's honest-to-God Joshi-styled Whitehead moment.:) Naito- who I was down on pretty much last time we all gathered around the warm glow of the wrestling video screen- is starting to stick out on these tapes because he has the cool technical way of doing Pro Style matwork- very stylized and expressive- as if he was trained by the Bros Malenko or their student Yuki Ishikawa. The budding grace is something worth keeping an eye, I'd say. I think the fact that he sold pretty well in this match is bringing him closer and closer to the tender embrace of my wrestling fandom heart. I think the problem last time is that he was trying to fight his true essence of Malenkodom but trying to acquire the Fighting Spirit of Manabu Nakanishi and that ain't helping nobody, friend. Express the true you, Young Tsunehito, and you will become the next Alexander Otsuka or Tetsuhiro Kuroda. Stay on the false course and you are wrestling Benkie and Osamu Tachihikari on the WAR Reunion show. Phantom looks less Ohtani-like this week but doesn't fear the ass-beating awaiting him- as Diasaku brings the Japanese Wrestling Stiffness in his spinning kicks right to the motherfucking face and Phantom leans into most of it like a motherfucking champ. Motherfuck! To make it even worse for the suddenly man-sized Phantom Funkoshi, Naito- who is a big, thick, lummoxy bastard- dropkicks Diasaku to keep Yasaku from breaking up the Figure Four Finisher of Phantom's and actaully lands right on poor Phantom's noggin. Phantom tries to figure out which seedy Japanese ring in which seedy Japanese promotion he is in and stumbles to his feet to try to take match this home before the hard facts of gravity take their toll on his crushed skull. Diasaku opts against the merciful quick pin for Phantom and decides to go all DRAMATIC~! on Phantom's ass and kicks out of a few pinning combinations until Phantom finally says, "Allright, Lou Thesz lay the fuck down already...." Phantom and Naito's theme song is that "Hey Little Lover" song that drives me insane for three after hearing it because I'll be at my computer at work- trying to save fibre optic cables and 8" high-pressure gas mains from being cut in two- and I'll start singing softly to myself, "Heeeey, little luvahh, heey, little luvah..." and I feel like a cretin, lose my concentration, phones lines are cut in two, air traffic control is rendered useless, thousands meet a fiery fate.... Ahh, who can fight it? Heeeey Little Luvah, Heeey Little Luvah....
(Sounds like) MAMOOOO ROSEEE vs (I'm thinking this would be a normally dressed) Teniechi Kacho: Kacho is the guy from last week who wears the Casual Friday garb and wrestles in a tie. Mamooo is lanky teenager with boxing gloves. There you go.
Nise Onita makes his prerequisite appearance on every Indie show that is held on the entire Asain Rim by showing up here and yelling at takagi. I hear Nise Onita has cancer and my have to retire. I hope I'm wrong. If I'm right, definately pray for the little freak.
ONRYO vs Kyohei Mikami: Mikami is really fucking awesome and Onryo is actually more than the Next Spectaculr Shoulder Separation Waiting To Happen- don't get me wrong, ONRYO has the nasty bump highlight reel that beats out Tony Rivera's Rookie Highlight Reel Of Botched Spots Of Sheer Death and is gathering ground on Psicosis's Career Highlight Reel Planned Spots Of Sheer Death. The difference is that ONRYO is really starting to develop other facets of his wrestling game, as he has been making the time between disfiguring face first plunges to the concrete much more interesting. Either way, Mikami proves that sometimes simplicity beats Elaborate Death as he shows up ONRYO's Springboard Plancha to the floor by getting Grody Phat Ass Air under a Piscada that was absolutely breath-taking in it's athletic grandeur and row-clearing force of impact. After this bone-crushing beginning that take it straight to Puerto Rico stylistically, working out of a standing armbar and working back down to the mat without ever hinting at Puroresu shootstyle or anything. Mikami gets it off the mat with his smooth as silk in-ring high-flying that ONRYO rudos like an undead Mister Condor- making the standing rana rock and sprucing up the already swanky deadly dropkicks of the hard-charging Mikami. they work this into a multi-layered array of totally swanky roll-ups as it all gets weird- the bell rings- as this goes BROADWAY~! after nine minutes tops. DDT can be baffling sometimes. This was still pretty cool. ONRYO is an up-and-comer and should acquit himself well at his ritual suicide at the Super-J Cup. And sooner or later TAKA vs Mikami is gonna happen and I will be suitably TORQUED!
Poison Sawada/ Naoshi Sano vs Shigeo Kato/ Mitsunobu Kikuzawa: Poison has the great Thin Lizzy/Humble Pie tribute band entrance music, so tonight there's gonna be a jailbreak. Somewhere in this town. Poison Sawada has a great American red.white and blue singlet to match his lingering Essence of Sam Houston that intermingles with his own trailertrash aura and makes for a real kookie vibe. Sano is the Sano of KNOCK OUT ME/GIRLFRIEND IS MONSTER T-SHirt fame and is pretty good in an actual ring- as good as he is on the tumbling mats, working for the kneebar on Manhole Man. Kikuzawa is the Shadow WXcito who is a good little slimy indie worker who brings his a-game for the challenge of grappling the lanky texan they call Poison- and he also has an inspired sequence with the similarly garbed Sano. Kato and Kikuzawa are in the Moebius nWoish invasion faction, so the go the route of the Southern Tag Formula with Sawada being an even-more mullet-enhanced Ricky Morton. After the prerequisite HEAT SEGMENT! and HOT TAG!, Sano and Poison are Twin Houses Afire and make with the stunning flourish of fan-and-rules-loving offense, all of which is polished off by duelling WAR Specials with Matching Bridges. I AM CHICKEN, indeed. Kato has a swanky brain-buster that he showed last time but he doesn't whip it out here- as this is pretty truncated by Miss Mongol doing a run-in to cut short the valiant efforts of the Occidental Dynamic dudes as she gets to Michinoku Driving Poison to set up Sano getting Powerbombed straight to hell by Kikuzawa. As the epic battle closes out, the Nagano Nightmares take out the Kawasaki Cruel Connection and we- as fans of the Pro Wrestling- are just simply midcardedly delighted. Everybody then hops on the STICK~! in very fast motion.
Tanomusako Toba/Takashi Sasaki/ Nihao vs Yuki Nishino/ asian Cougar/ Super Rider: This match is the BIG reason to get this tape because it basically just righteously kicks ass. Super Rider- who I has been maligned and who I have stigmatized for you- the future or current viewer of the fabulous DDT promotion- FREAKS OUT by making with the zany highspots to kick this motherfucker off, busting out the fearsome Tope that was Ciclon Ramirez-esque in it's wreckless abandon. Nihao is still shootstyley and nifty on the mat. he and Super Rider ground the match at certain points points by working huge batches of stylisticalkly credible UWFi Lite shootstyle- and also kick the holy fuck out of each other and it's quite a spectacle of Indie Vestigal Shootstyle, asll of which is a nice counterpoint to the major passages of Asian Cougar and Sasaki bringing fifteen flavors of superhot death to blow the highend of this motherfucker of the fucking map. Nishino is the guy that looks like Bob Starr of US Indie fame. Nishino is quite a decent worker and he opts to simulate Wahoo McDaniel in this, going all goofy with the knife-edge chops full in the face of flying kicks and the alluring promise of Cross-Arms Broken supplied by the shooty trio of the opposition. U-S-A! U-S-A! Meanwhile, Sasaki says, "Fuck the stylistic Odes To Mid-Atlantic Wrestling and UWFi. YOU DIE DIE DIE motherfucking DIE, ASIAN COUGAR!" and he then whips out his neck crackling powermove arsenal and Asian Cougar gets many, many vertebrae compressed from nasty as all hell Running Northern Lights Bombs and Crushing Jumping Knees Right To The Fucking Face. Asian Cougar says, "Eat it, Facial Hair Boy!" and the continued Legacy Of Asian Cougar's Most Preposterous and Elaborate Legdrop Situations and Combinations progresses at its petty pace- the pinnacle being exercised on the freshly back-broken Tanumusako Toba who is decapitated on the floor as Cougar drops the leg from over the top rope, a spot where Asain Cougar gets fucking HOMICIDAL air underneath the drop. Nihao and Super Rider take it all back to the mat after the airspace over the ring clears out and it all builds up to Nihao hitting a hurtful Capture Suplex that led to lower grade German and Tigers with bridges and other higher impact move- as the Super Rider and Nihao section mirrors the high impact non-shootstyle shenanigans of Cougar and Sasaki. Sasaki goes back to hating and hating and hating Asian Cougar and after busting up Asian a while with more face-hurting kicks and back-bludgeoning suplex VARIATIONS, Asain gets a Transitional Counter in the corner, hitting a cool ass Somersault Plancha off the Turnpost. Asian Cougar goes for Jun Kasai-like Diving Headbutt but MISSES BY A MILE- allowing Sasaki to flail wildly as he gets all expressive and shit while procuring two La Majistral on Asian Cougar to get the win. The reason this is so cool is because it's divided neatly into two stylistic similar rivalries- all of which are put together in such a way as to keep the match seamless despite the highly varying styles being established psychologically, thus the high-flying and high-impact of Cougar and Sasaki kicks in to take you logically off the mat where Nihao and Super Rider have gotten as far as they can with their designated style at that moment. Nihao and Super Rider pick back up after the Cougar and Sasaki sections have met a logical, bone-crushing end. Thus, taking it back to the mat in an interesting way is the perfect way to set up the finish as Cougar and Sasaki complete the attempted homicide. Meanwhile Toba and Nishino attempt to crack the veneer of the psychology of the match by having a striking section that could be sandwhiched between the other two major psychological structures of the match, but Super Rider and Nihoa strike harder, and Sasaki and Cougar sections are SO high impact that by half way through the match both Toba and Nishino settle into support for setting the larger mechanics of the match put forth by the other four. Either way, it's deul prong attack that you usual don't get from an indie match- as it's kinda like you took the stiff submission wrestling of BattlARTS and heightened their recent experiments with high-end high-flying. So you should definately know that THIS MATCH IS THE MOTHERFUCKING SLEAZY INDIE BISCUITS, TENDER COMRADES.
Sanshiro Takagi/ Exciting Yoshida vs Koichiro Kimura/ Masao Orihara: This match pretty much sucked for a lot of reasons, but it did show a glimmer of what could be a cool ass tagteam. If Kimura actually develops ANY kind of Pro Style skill and psychology, he and Orihara would make a GREAT ass-stomping heel tagteam. Orihara as the powerguy in the Tonpahi Machine guns isn't NEARLY as cool as gigantic ass-stomper Koichiro Kimura assuming the position as ass-stomper and it allows Orihara to concentrate on being a little bastard- all of which works amazingly well in the opening minutes of this match as Kimura and Orihara beat the life out of Takagi and Yoshida. After the inital flourish of dickishness, Takagi goes on the offensive attack and Kimura basically sells for a real long time. The problem is that while Takagi shows flashes of inspired power wrestling, Exciting Yoshida isn't really cut out to match anyone in this match in shootstyle or power wrestling, so he is left with weak looking elbow drops on the monstrous kimura and so Kimura looks weird sellling them as much as he does. Orihara should have gone US Pro Style with Yoshida and played up to his strengths, instead exposing the the one-dimensionality of both Kimura and Yoshida by leaving both of them in their together for so long. Either way, Kimura gets either hurt or blown up and Orihara's brother has to run-in to set up large portions of the finish. Takagi blows some basic spots as there is confusion as they try to piece together an improptu finish and thus a proper build-up is non-existent and this match fades out to the finish. Not good.
GEt this for the ONRYO/Mikani and Cougar/Sasaki/Toba/ Naito/Nishino/Super Rider matches. Only the main event was somewhat disappointing.
!@!@!@!@!@ Socha's Best of Japan '91 Vol. 1
As is tradition with this, every now and then, I'm sent something which I am oblivous to the history behind which is bound to piss off as many people as possible when I review it and gloss over something that is well know. The tape is labled as being '91, so if the dates are wrong... blame Dean!
Stan Hansen v. Kenta Kobashi
: Hey, Kenta didn't hear about the all you can eat shrimp
bar at the Tokyo Sizzler yet. This is from Korakuen Hall. Kenta
is young and stupid, so on a rope break, he slaps Stan in the face... which
results in Stan going ape shit and beating the shit out of him with a chair.
Kenta weathers the intial assault and works on Stan's lariat arm.
This is '91 and head dropping moves aren't being sold at bargin basement
prices so Kenta works the arm on the mat for a while. Stan fights
back and works on Kenta's arm a bit before they do a brief brawling bit
that Kenta (obviously)
comes up on the short end of the stick
on. Kenta gets near falls with a bulldog and a DDT off the second
rope. Kenta barely is able to lift him up, but slams Hansen down
and hits the moonsault for another 2. Kenta's frustrated and takes
it to the floor briefly. When he's back in, Stan drops him with a
few elbows. Kenta goes for an sleeper, but Stan drives him into the
buckles. Kenta blocks one lariat attempt with a drop kick, but runs
into another for a pin. By today's
standards, nothing spectacular, but no real flaws.
Akira Hokuto v. Manami
Toyota : Toyota is the All Pacific champ in this (the White
Belt). Both women are all beat up, with Hokuto's arm in a cast that's
up above her elbow as well as her knee taped up and Toyota's knee is all
taped up. I'm sure it's working hurt like this that did wonders for
the longevity of women's wrestling careers. Toyota spends a good
part of the match, ripping the tape and cast off of Hokuto's arm as Lioness
Asaka
calling the action in the booth.
Toyota works over Akira's arm. The ref tries to hold back Toyota
as the seconds (including the short haired Mita) check on Hokuto on the
floor. Hokuto is able to stun Manami and get in a twin spin kicks
off the ropes, but Toyota goes right back to work on the arm. Toyota
gets in a pescado to the floor, but when she goes for a plancha off the
post, she finds nothing but seconds. Hokuto gets in her somersault dive
off the post in. When they return to the ring, Akira works a half
crab
on Toyota's bad leg. Toyota rallies
back with some drop kicks, but gets caught up top. Hokuto slips as
Toyota is taken over on the superplex which could have been real bad.
Toyota recovers first and goes after the arm. Hokuto's partner, Suzuka
Minami, is on the apron with the towel, but Akira makes it to the ropes
on her own. Toyota gets near falls following a moonsault and a Tiger
Suplex. Toyota misses another moonsault and Akira
rallies with a top rope drop kick and
a german suplex for two, but she misses another dive and Toyota put the
armbar again. This time the towel is thrown in. As a display
of guts, it was up there, but the flip side of the coin is that Akira probably
had no business being in the ring that night and I didn't exaclty enjoy
watching this.
Jungle Jack v. Kyoko Inoue/Bull
Nakano : Double Hair match : Hey, the scissors are out, hair
is flyin', people are getting stabbed in the head! Kyoko is even thinner
than Kobashi! Aja and Bull go toe to toe for a bit, Bison comes in
but Bull isn't selling any of her running chops. Kyoko comes in and
is all spunky (the codeword for someone who's going to be pummelled for
their team). Aja and Bison get their heat on Kyoko for a bit.
Bull
gets the hot tag and she in turn chokes
Bison for hurtin her little buddy. Aja gets the tag in and bends her can
on Bull's head. Aja drops Bull after several urakens, but Kyoko breaks
up the pin. Aja tries for another uraken but eats one of her own.
Bull and Aja take turns cutting the other's hair. Aja jabs both Bull and
Kyoko in the head with the scissors. They brawl out on the floor,
when the come back in a pole and a overgrown nunchuku thing are used.
This is gets pretty garbage-riffic as the choke out each others
with chains and do the "walk them around
the building type browling." We get a second helping of double hair
chopping with Bison and Bull. The weird part is the match goes from
total clusterfuck back to almost a regulation tag match realtively easily.
Bull hits a pretty nasty powerbomb on Bison that folds her up pretty nastily.
Bison is able to tag out and Aja runs over Bull with two Aja attacks, but
runs into a lariat on the third. Kyoko coves in a scores near falls
with her run up the ropes elbow and a german suplex before getting run
over. Bison and Bull are tagged in. Bull sells briefly before
Aja and Bison miss and uraken and chop respectively. Bull beats on
Bison with the nunchuku. It seems like Kyoko runs out of steam at
some point in here as she blows her spring back elbow spot once and lands
mostly on the floor when diving off Bull's shoulders to the floor on Bison.
Bull hits the top rope leg drop once but Aja's there for the save.
The Jack try to rebound by whipping Bull and Kyoko into each other, but
Kyoko does her rebound elbow by jumping off Bull into Aja, knocking her
to the floor. Bull drops Bison with an uraken. They set up the top
rope leg drop for a second time and Jungle Jack earns themselves some haircuts.
If there is ever a picture put next to the definition of "Pissed Off",
it's the face of Aja Kong as she sits in the chair getting her head shaved.
This match is great to watch with an non-wrestling fan just to get their
reaction as the shave off all of Bison's long hair. I have seen this
match before as it's on just about everyone's comp tape in one volume somewhere.
Toshiaki Kawada v. Akira
Taue : Perhaps the biggest laugh out loud moment of all this...
spotting Taue's giant hair. They go right at each other on the floor,
in the ring briefly and then back out to the floor with Taue hitting the
lumpy tope. They brawl out on the floor a bunch more, with Kawada
busting Taue open with some rams into the rail and flattening his hair
with some chairshots. Taue works on on of Kawada's legs, ramming
it into the rail once and then going after some leg bars in the ring.
Taue gives Kawada a knee breaker on the time keepers table (seemingly a
favorite of the Jumbo faction). Taue works a figure four in ring,
then rams Kawada's leg into the post and goes after his leg some more with
a chair. Kawada fights him off and works on his head with elbows
and knees, before Taue takes him down and goes to an inside toe hold.
Kawada fights back and goes for the powerbomb, but Taue is able to fight
him off, hit his sumo thrusts and a DDT while standing on the first rope.
Taue tries to press his luck by going up top, but Kawada catches him, but
can't hold him up when he goes for a slam. Taue's size also helps
him when Kawada goes to powerbomb him, but Taue just lands on top of him
for a near fall. Kawada catches Taue with a small package for a near
fall. Taue tries to take out Kawada with headbutts, but Kawada weathers
them and nails a enzulariato to score a flash
pin. Finish was just sort of out
of nowhere. Weird to see a blade job in All Japan... and Taue with
giant hair. Post match, Taue gives Kawada a going away stomp.
Misawa/Kobashi/Kikuchi v. Tsuruta/Fuchi/Mighty Inoue : The fans chant "Tsu-ru-ta! *OH!*" when Jumbo comes out. This jumps into the action with Fuchi and Kobashi. Fuchi sells a few Kobashi chops to the face by staggering back to the corner. He deposits Kobashi to the outside and Jumbo gives him the earlier mentioned kneebreaker on the table. This spot is repeated by Fuchi as Inoue whacks Kikuchi with a chair when he tries to make the save for Kobashi. Grumpy old guys take turns working on Kobashi's leg and bending him in crabs and assorted toe holds. Kenta teases getting a tag when he reverses a Fuchi gutwrench suplex attempt with one of his own, but Fuchi holds onto him. Kikuchi saves Kobashi from another boston crab, allowing Kobashi to make the hot tag to Misawa who beats on Fuchi a bit, before Jumbo tags in giving the fans the hot match up. Jumbo eats some elbows, but reverses a Misawa flying headbutt out of the corner into a mat slam. Kikuchi saves Misawa from the pin attempt. Kobashi misses a top rope drop kick at Jumbo and Jumbo removes him from the picture. Kikuchi gets the hot tag and he flails away on Jumbo, getting him on the ropes and all. Kikuchi is spunky! And Jumbo HATES spunky... and thusly kicks him with a boot to the face and a lariat. Kikuchi gets handed off to Mighty Inoue. Inoue gets caught in a fisherman suplex, but kicks out. Kikuchi misses his diving headbutt and almost gets pinned following two rolling sentons. They have guys switching in and out with each teasing near falls with their partners making the save. Kobashi and Fuchi both play partner in peril, but eventually, Fuchi is stuck in the ring as Kikuchi and Misawa cut off Inoue and Jumbo and gets pinned by a moonsault. Fun match. Fun match.
Mr. Pogo/The Gladiator v. Sambo Asako/Atsushi Onita : Handheld : Hey, this is a best of '91 tape.... if Sambo, Onita and Pogo aren't blowing each other up... I don't feel the need to watch it at normal speed. I did watch this at normal speed enough to notice that Pogo came to the ring in cowboy boots, took them off to beat Onita in the head with and then wrestled the rest of the match barefoot. I guess this may have some importance because Goto saves Onita and Sambo from a beatdown at the end, but it's still Goto... so... hey, what's this button marked "FF" do....
Big Van Vader v. Tatsumi
Fujinami : Vader comes out in his old armor, that's mic'ed
so you can hear him grunting and yelling "VADER! BLARGH! VADER!"
during his ring entrance. That armor thing ruled. Vader comes
out wearing the CWA title belt, and this is for Fujinami's IWGP title.
Vader whips off his mask to show "he means bidness" before we get underway.
Vader controls early pummelling Fujinami with some punches, forcing him
to roll out to the floor to get a breather. Fujinami comes back in
and drops Vader
with the punches of his own and gets
in a backdrop suplex which pops the crowd. I think the parallel between
Aja and Vader that makes them great monsters is that they can get away
with no selling from time to time because they're not afraid to bump and
sell for you through out the course of the match, so even when they are
getting beat, they've powerful enough to make you believe that they are
truly badass when they go back on offense. Vader controls for a lot
of this with his usual punches, forearms, headbutts,
Vader attackes, itdc. Fujinami
rallies at one point with some flying forearms and a jumping kick that
doesn't look like it hits, but Vader sells anyway. Vader bleeds following
a post shot and Fujinami ramming him into some chairs in the crowd.
Fujinami punches away on the bloody Vader, who fights his way up once before
Fujinami drops him with more punches. Doctors try to check on Vader,
but Vader kicks him down when he gets in the ring and Fujinami jumps right
back on Vader. Fujinami gets Vader in the octopus
hold, but has to give it up. Vader
meets him with punches coming back in and crushes Fujinami when he attempts
a sunset flip by sitting on him and then hitting a splash. Fujinami
gets a 2 on a small package. Vader gets up first, Fujinami blocks
on lariat but Vader immediately hits him with one from his other arm and
follows it up with a running lariat to score the pin and win the IWPG title.
Jumbo Tsuruta v. Stan Hansen
: Stan attacks right at the bell with brawling and has control
for a few minutes from Jumbo stops him with a jumping knee. They work a
side headlock sport for a while as Dan Spivey, now available for fashion
shoots, looks on. After several failed attempts, Jumbo counters the
headlock and works a shoulder armbreaker on Stan's lariat arm before working
on the arm and taking it to the mat with some pin attempts while holding
Stan's arm in a hammerlock. Stan and Jumbo exchanges chops and elbows.
Stan fights his way up once, but Jumbo chops him down. Stan eventually
brawls out of the armbar and uses
some roughhousing to gain control. He takes it to the floor, elbows
Jumbo on the apron and hits him with a chair. Stan hits a backdrop suplex
for a 2. Stan drops some big elbows, including 2 off the bottom rope
for 2 counts. Stan goes for another backdrop, but Jumbo kicks off
the top rope and both guys are down. Jumbo gets up first and catches
Stan with a thesz press for 2 and a neckbreaker for another two. Jumbo
slams stan and hits a diving jumping knee for another near fall.
Jumbo hits a lariat, but Stan absorbs
it and lariats Jumbo, mostly in the face, which Jumbo foot saves at 2.
They have a small package reversal spot with each getting a near fall.
Jumbo dodges a Stan lariat attempt into a sort of pinning move that looked
weird. Jumbo goes for a lariat but Stan stops him with a DDT for
a two count. A shoulder breaker gets stan another near fall.
Jumbo reverses a whip, but Stan hits him with a shoulder tackle
to take him down. Stan goes for
a lariat, but Jumbo ducks it and hits a jumping neckbreaker drop for the
win. Kind of weird to see a match end with that move after years
of seeing death moves. It's not really a move I associate with Jumbo,
then again, I haven't exactly seen a lot of him. Post match Stan
gives Jumbo a go away beating and takes off.
Thus ends Vol. 1. I was into the
All Japan stuff that I saw. Early '90's stuff is new to me.
Jumbo's a lot of fun to watch given his stiffness and his selling, plus
it's fun watching him in with Kikuchi like the crazy little kid who's determined
to take out the big bully even though he's totally out gunned. I
watched the other 4 Volumes of the '91 stuff, so I'll go into those when
I get to them.
~!~
$%$%$%$%$%% Battle Arts
Taped 12-25-99
(PHIL SCHNEIDER)
Takeshi Ono vs. Ryuji Hijikata: Surprisingly great match, as Ono has been adrift as part of the incredibly cool, but kind of crappy, Tonapachi Machine Guns. Ono’s hair is now dyed blond and along with his normally gaunt appearance he really looks like he is banging junk. Ono has moved fully into freaked out tricky ways to twist someone’s arms and knees off. My personal favorite was when he countered Hijikata’s Fishermans buster attempt, but rolling through with an inside cradle kneebar. Hijikata hits some decent power stuff, but he is still a little New Japan Heavywieghtish for my taste. The end is pretty choice with Ono hitting a Falcon Arrow and a Rings of Saturnish thing for the tap out.
Minoru Tanaka vs. Tsubo Genjin: Yikes it’s superworker Minoru Tanaka in a comedy match with a wrestler who has a genitalia based offense. If you always wanted to see a caveman bite Minoru Tanaka in the store (I am looking at you Tony Gancarski) pick this match up, if you haven’t, don’t.
Alexander Otsuka/Katsumi Usuda vs. Masaaki
Mochizuki/SAITO: Weird stylistic clash in this match, as SAITO who is the
most lucha of the Ultimo Dragon students gets thrown in with the very shooty
Usuda and Mochizuki. SAITO has a bunch of submissions but the lineage is
much more Dos Caras the Yoshikara Fujiwara. Otsuka fearlessly steps
in and takes it to
the mat with the young luchadore, as
Otsuka tries to see how many times he can kip up in one match. Mochizuki
and Usuda seem content to beat the crap out of each other, as they spend
most of their sections kicking and punching each other right in the visage.
The match was more fun then good, but Otsuka did a decent job approximating
Blue Panther and Usuda and Maasaki kicked and punched with appropriate
force.
Mitsuya Nagai/Mohammed Yone vs. Daisuke
Ikeda/Mach Junji: Nagai is a RINGS expatriate who decided to move into
the big leagues and compete in BattlArts. Not being familiar with his work
before this, I was expecting someone to perform some deliberate mat wrestling
and kill the pace of a standard BattlArts match. Instead Nagai comes out
pro-style like a
mofo, with a butterfly suplex, a tombstone
piledriver and even an eye rake, its like he had been toiling in RINGS
not wanting to be Rickson Gracie but desperately wanting to be Dick Slater.
This match was hit and miss, Yone wasn’t afraid to suck ass, as he is turning
into quite the 1997 Jinsei Shinzaki, as he moves from wildly inconsistent
highs and lows. Ikeda was Ikeda, but most of the match was a HEAT
SEGMENT on Mach Junji. Junji dropped the pink hair and was sporting a poofy
brown perm, which made him look like a shootstyle Leif Garrett. Mach is
about 37 pounds and is sort of a Puroresu Spike Dudley, in as much was
he will take a horrific beating, but his offense is comical. He does get
beaten into my heart at the end, as he leans forward into a hellacious
Nagai spin kick, which got the multiple rewinding and slow mow treatment
from both me and Dean (The effect was amplified by
the teen idol hair flying back and forth.)
Nagai and Ikeda didn’t hook up much, but the little sections were all stiff
and brawly and got me juiced for their singles match. The whole show
didn’t have a singularly great match, but there were plenty of little things
that made it worth watching.
Once again, Def Jeff Lynch (here's the plug- [email protected]) comes through with this 1981 WWF highlight reel. This is basically the Sgt. Slaughter Show, which I have no problems with since Sarge was King Of All He Surveyed back in this phase of his career.
$5,000 COBRA CLUTCH CHALLENGE:
SGT. SLAUGHTER vs. RICK MCGRAW: This is actually REALLY good as Sarge
stirs the crowd into a froth before finally clamping the hold on McGraw,
then they basically have the equivalent of that one RVD-Taz match where
RVD fought for like 5 minutes before finally tapping out to the Tazmission.
Here Rick
bounces Sarge all over the ring before
finally passing out, at which point Sarge CUTS A PROMO on Pat Patterson.
This gets good later.
WWF TITLE: BOB BACKLUND vs. SGT. SLAUGHTER (Philadelphia): Here Sarge earns his pay by bumping all over the ring and making Bob's carny offense look super-deadly. And you KNOW you're a great heel when you're in South Philly and the fans are booing you and cheering the babyface. =) Sarge eventually juices Backlund after posting him twice, and the sight of him hopping up and down in glee after seeing the blood is worth the proce of admission alone. Backlund hits an A-1 gusher here, but he reverses a whip and Sarge takes that crazy bump of his over the ringpost to the floor. Backlund follows him out, shoots him into the railing and sends him back into the ring, but in doing so Sarge beats the count and Backlund loses by COR. WWF Booking 101... champ loses the first house show match via screwjob du jour to set up the returns.
SGT. SLAUGHTER puts up an extra $5,000 for Patterson to take the Cobra Clutch challenge. This gets good later.
TONY ATLAS interview: You can see Vince McMahon get all goo-goo-eyed as he invites Tony to strike a few poses, but here comes Freddie Blassie and his new charge to ruin Vince's fun. Hulk Hogan comes out in the RAINBOW cape, and you can tell he just got out of Memphis since he gets all ethnic on Tony's ass ("boy," "brown clown," "shine my shoes"). Brief impromptu follows until Hogan crotches Tony on the top rope and poses. Hogan was quite the decent worker back then so this is OK while it lasts, but people who say Sid has the worst punches ever needs to see more of Tony's matches. OK, maybe they don't...
SGT. SLAUGHTER-PAT PATTERSON INTERVIEW,
take 3: Game On! Patterson finally takes the challenge after
Sarge slaps him, and is just about to break the hold when Sarge knees him
in the gut and juices him with a chairshot. Sarge reapplies the hold
and HERE COMES THE CAVALRY! Tony Garea, Rick Martel, Dominic Denucci...
"no, we need the cavalry
here! Who called you clowns in?"
Denucci lays in some dainty chair-shots and Gorilla Monsoon finally hustles
Sarge to the back. I should note that Sarge has the Grand Wizard
as his manager (wearing the SWANK "soul brother" disco hat as opposed to
the turban), which I can't really understand since he doesn't interfere
in anything and Sarge
does all of his own talking. This
gets good later.
SGT. SLAUGHTER vs. ANDRE THE GIANT (MSG):
I know, I know... you see "Slaughter vs. Andre" and you start licking your
chops envisioning the bumpage to follow. Once again Sarge mortgages
his future by becoming a human pinball for his opponent... at one point
he drops Andre and heads up to do the Slaughter Cannon, but Andre press-slams
him off the
top and Sarge gets so much hang-time
that I was afraid he was gonna get wrapped up in the Red Holzman pennant
hanging from the ceiling. The ref gets bumped after Sarge pulls
him into Andre's path and Sarge gets DQ'ed at 7:58.
TONY ATLAS vs. HULK HOGAN (MSG): Quickie last match of the MSG show to send the crowd home happy as Atlas does the poses, absorbs some punishment, comes back with the "angry Brotha house o'fire" schtick and pins Hogan after straddling him on the ropes. MSG 201. Postmatch Hogan slams Dick Kroll and gives him the LEG DROP OF DOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMM back when it was basically the setup for the lariat or the bearhug.
WWF TAG-TEAM TITLE: MOONDOGS REX
& KING vs. RICK MARTEL/TONY GAREA: Funny to see Martel and Garea
get the big-ass girlie pop as they hit the ring, but they're getting booed
out of the building by the guys in Allentown or Hamburg or wherever this
was taped. Moondogs work over Martel for a long time before Garea
gets the hot tag (doesn't
that just *sound* pathetic?), but the
ref gets bumped, King hits Garea with the bone and makes the cover.
New champs! Other than the spectacle of seeing titles switch on the
syndie show, not much else going here.
HULK HOGAN vs. ANDRE THE GIANT (Philadelphia):
Anyone want to tell me who used to announce the WWF Philly shows for PRISM
so I know who to choke next time I'm in town? This match is great
because the ref is the ORIGINAL Extreme Official, Dick Woehrle (as Rev
Ray once told me, "You know the ref's a bad-ass when *he* wears wrestling
boots..."),
and he literally does nothing but sit
on the ropes in the all-black Joe Higuchi ensemble while bull moose Hogan
and Andre whale away on each other. Hogan actually slams Andre at
one point and, even more incredibly, HE SELLS THE EFFORT! Later on
with both guys on the mat, Andre gives Hogan this MASSIVE smack to the
face that had me actually feeling sorry for Hogan for about a half-second.
Andre eventually pulls off Hogan's elbowpad and juices him with a huge
clothesline- Announcer: "It's LEGALIZED MURDER!" Yes!
Open season on crappy announcers! Where do I get my license?
Hogan comes back with a desperation kick, but he can't pick up Andre for
the second slam and gets smothered by Andre's bulk for the pin at 12:51.
Fun stuff... I have no problems with Hogan during this timeframe since
he was still prone to actually working reasonably hard during a match.
More WWF in DVDVR 118 once we get past
the luchathon next ish...
| $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
THEME OF THE WEEK: BAD WRESTLER(S), GOOD MATCH MASCARA CONTRA MASCARA: RAYO DE
JALISCO JR. vs. CIEN CARAS (9/21/90, Arena Mexico)- (PETE
STEIN): No, I haven't lost my mind. These are
two of the worst wrestlers ever to get a sizable push and yet I'll be damned
if they didn't go out here and work a hell of a match, perhaps the most
important mask match in the history of Mexico. This has my personal
favorite match opening ever as Rayo isn't even through the ropes yet when
Cien absolutely
Rey Mysterio Jr. v. Misterioso
– Mask v. Mask 5/16/97- (PHIL SCHNEIDER): Misterioso
may have been a good luchadore at one time , he seems to have some faded
athleticism and some concept of what to do in the ring. However inertia
and narcotic abuse had led him to be a shell of whatever potential he might
have had. The mask has such an iconic role in Lucha history that even the
most half assed luchadore will step it up when he is dropping the hood
(as Pogo Pete mentioned earlier, I still need to see it to believe it.)
Also, Rey Mysterio Jr. did not want to take his uncle’s mask in a bad match,
so both guys had their working boots laced. Misterioso unmothballed
a tope to start and him and Junior did some ring side brawling, with Rey
taking a nice ring post bump. Rey took the first fall rather quickly with
a springboard leg drop. Misterioso controlled the second fall, doing some
nice mat based submission work on Rey’s knee and gets a submission with
Lucha hold #7286. Because this is Tijuana they brawl into the crowd, a
section which was highlighted by Rey doing a balcony dive. They take into
the ring and have a nice nearfall section highlighted by a Misterioso superplex
, Junior top rope rana and a pair of really nice Nodowa’s by the rudo (getting
nice height and power because Rey is so small.) Rey finally gets the duke
|
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
NEXT WEEK: CMLL
JAPAN! EMLL! FULL! AAA! UWA! LUCHA MEXICO! LUCHA PUERTO RICO! LUCHA PANAMA!
LUCHA! LUCHA! LUCHA! THE GIGANTIC ALL LUCHA DEATH VALLEY DRIVER #117! WE'RE
CLEANING HOUSE. WHIP ASS!
************************************************************
THE DEATH VALLEY PLAYBOYS.
six fists in the face
of wrestling
*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^
You moved me with a kiss
And now I'm drinking until
you don't exist
I can't be someone without
you
I'm just crazy about you
-Adena, the Smoking Popes.
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
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