~!~
#$#$#$##$#$#$#$#$#Osaka Pro
- Samurai TV (Taped 7/24/99, Aired 8/25/99)
(by PHIL RIPPA)
Osaka Pro is the group that was started
up by Super Delfin after he got fed up with Michinoku Pro- which means
the return of some old favorites in addition to new guys who I had never
seen with some really bizarre outfits.
The tape opens with a bunch of clips, the
highlight being Dick Togo putting Naohiro Hoshikawa through a table with
a big fat senton. We next join Delfin in the ring with all his boys. They
are interrupted by Togo, Black Buffalo, Police Man and Big Dick 296, who
are a heel stable whose name I don't know. Big Dick is the groups
mouth piece and he introduces a clip that shows the fellows participating
in some sort of SATAN WORSHIP! It could have been an elabarate bible study
too but I'm going with SATAN WORSHIP! Basically idea is that there is a
guy in a hood leading the ceremony and they are trying to resurrect the
spirit of someone. Bottom line. IT'S SPORTS ENTERTAINMENT BABY!
Toritos vs. Super Demkin:
The progression of wrestling crustaceans
takes its next step as Toritos is a wrestling LOBSTER, right down claw
hands and a tail. He is a portly creature who is not afraid to do a moonsault
or two. Of course, he yukked it up with the crowd a lot which was probably
an attempt to win over their trust and put down their butter knives. Demkin
did a couple of dropkicks and that was it. Short match that saw the lobster
go over.
Ebsessan vs. Monkey Magic:
Seeing Monky Magic makes me shutter because
I get the feeling that Delfin is going to be calling in a favor and convincing
Yone Genjin to come out of retirement at any moment. Some more unnecessary
comedy, as Monkey Magic humps the ref and hops around the ring ropes because...well...
he is a monkey and all. Meanwhile, Ebsessan is all about the Fu Manchu
mustache and the elephant ears attached to the mask. Some decent lucha
matwork through the beginning of this match. And that was it. About six
minutes in the decide to bring it home as Ebsessan wins with an absurd
rollup that has Monkey sucking his own cock.
Kuishibu Kamen vs. Arkangel:
Kamen is another in the long line of wrestling
clowns, complete with baggy pant and novelty oversized glasses sewn on
his mask. Arkangel merely shrugs at all this and says "I've seen wrestling
clowns all my life son. Let's get to the wrestling." Arkangel plays to
the crowd a lot but he still couldn't manage to win over the kiddie demographic
as lots of babies are heard crying on the tape as Arkangel whips into the
friendly clown. Action was all but there was no story behind. Pretty much,
"I'm going to do this now. Okay, well let me do this to you." Kamen did
bust out a nice little Asai moonsault while Arkangel worked all stiff,
punching the smiling clown right in his oversized lips. Arkangel wins will
a quality Lyger Bomb. Nothing to complain. Could have been better if they
had worked on building to something instead of
passing out candy to the kids.
Naohiro Hoshikawa/Yoshihito
Sugamoto vs. Tsubasa/Oriental:
By the end of the Sekigun/KDX feud, Hoshikawa
had turned into quite the good little wrestler. So I was stoked about seeing
him again for the first time in awhile. And I am happy to report that Hoshikawa
can still bring it, even with the leathery Japanese motorcycle gang look
that he has now. Man those shiny tights and boots look like they came straight
out of the pages of Schneider's International Male catalog. Hey it's Sugamoto,
he's......... Sugamoto. Unfortunately for us- the viewer, the majority
of the match is Sugamoto getting worked over. While fitting in with the
psychological of the match (Tsubasa and Oriental know that Hoshikawa is
a handfull so they will pick on the younger, less talented member), it
means not enough Hoshikawa laying in the kicks. I'm still up in the air
about Tsubasa. He seems like he has some potential and I have heard some
good things about him but he hasn't done anything yet to knock my socks
off. Oriental and Tsubasa are not afraid to break out the supremely Van
Damesque rolling and tumbling, fruity embellished routines. Especially
the really freaky handspring elbow/clothesline combo. Hoshikawa is able
to lay in a couple of brief beatings but it seems that his main purpose
is to constantly bail his partner out of trouble. My problem with the match
is that they start building to this really hot finish that stalls because
Oriental and Tsubasa keep getting all elaborate and the whole momentum
stalls. It almost seemed that they couldn't remember how they were supposed
to end the match. They finally hit a super rana/splash combination to pin
Sugamoto. Nowhere near wretched but could have been better.
Super Delfin/Masato Yakushiji/Masaru
Seno vs. Dick Togo/Black Buffalo/Policeman:
Looky here. It's Delfin and Togo in a
six-man but Yakushiji was never an acceptable replacement for the Great
Sasuke and Seno it certainly not Tiger Mask while Buffalo and Policeman
aren't TAKA and Men's Teioh. With that being said, this is still a very
good match. Especially when you don't try to compare it too the old MPRO
matches of lore. Buffalo and Policeman both seem to be trying to find exactly
what their wrestling niche is going to be. Policeman seems to be striving
for the aerial wrestler who isn't afraid to sell anything. Buffalo seems
quite content to be the straight traditional rudo (headbutts to the groin,
flipping off the crowd, etc..) Both do fairly well especially Policeman
who took some NASTY bumps throughout the match. The general story behind
the match is that the Togo lead team are recruiting young, impressionable
Seno - which baffles me since he is so far and away the worst wrestler
in this match. So after Seno blows a couple of simple moves, his teammates
are questioning his allegiances. The standard six-man formula is followed
as everybody grabs a partner and then the heels dominate for awhile. Yakushiji
is practically jumping for joy that he gets to work with Togo again as
Togo could always sell Yakushiji's outdated Misterio Jr. offense. (On a
side note, who ever told Yakushiji that wearing the wetsuit was a good
idea was horribly mistaken.) It is wonderful to see Togo wrestling again
and he immediately shows he is back in his element as he easily would wrestle
for five in he had too. He must have some residual bitterness from the
WWF days because he was taking it out on poor Yakushiji. Delfin is barely
in the match and when he is it is all on offense. He of course recruits
Policeman in to see if he can see how rubbery the man in the riot gear
mask can be. Answer is a whole lot. Finally the highspot train rolls in
Policeman immediately jumps even higher on my list of wrestlers as he gets
some serious air with a BOSS super quebrada. The faces run into one small
problem though. Yakushiji and Delfin leave Seno alone and Togo swoops in
and damn near kills the portly youngster with a senton for the win.
But wait kids, the fun isn't over yet.
The lights go out and a mind-numblingly long ceremony starts as the HOODED
FIGURE comes out and takes/gives blood with Seno. I don't know, it was
all SATANARIFIC. Eventually the heels leave and everyone checks on the
bloody Seno. Seno just waves everyone off and staggers back to the dressing
room but not before shooting a menacing look at Delfin. Hey I thing the
kids call that foreshadowing! Clips are then shown of an eight-man that
includes the hooded figure. Delfin meanwhile has wised up and brought Hoshikawa
to the fight. We are shown the faces getting their mitts on the HOODED
FIGURE. The beat him up and rip off his hood to reveal....... Wait for
it.......... some gagged guy. The camera barely shows who it is but I am
able to determine that it is a friend of Delfin's or something. Suddenly,
another HOODED FIGURE appears. This one takes off his hood to reveal.......
Wait for it..... SENO completely with
face paint and bad perm. Seno runs in
chokeslams Delfin and we are out.
Well, the wrestling was good and the everything else was SPORTS ENTERTAINMENT BABY! Definitely worth a look. If SATAN WORSHIP! isn't your cup of tea, you always have the luxury of the fast forward button.
~+~
@#@#@#@#@#@#FRONTIER MARTIAL-ARTS
WRESTLING- 10TH ANNIVERSARY- MAKING OF NEW LEGEND (11-23-99 Yokohama Arena)
(by PETE STEIN!)
This would be the second of FMW's anniversary
shows in 1999, assuming one counts the May show from Bunka as one as well.
WEW SIX-MAN TAG TITLE- SNATCHING LADDER
MATCH: GEDO/JADO/KOJI NAKAGAWA (w/Kaoruko Arai) vs. RICKY FUJI/CHOCOBALL
MUKAI/FLYING KID ICHIHARA (w/ Sena Wakana):
Someone out there has to explain Jado's
"Extra- Crispy Triple H" gimmick to me. On the other team, Sena comes
out wearing a prim business suit- ***STRIP ALERT!*** ***STRIP ALERT!***
Chocoball's "porn star" gimmick is only a rip-off of Val Venis until you
find out that he's an ACTUAL PORN STAR. You can tell he's a good
guy because he tosses what appears to be condoms to the fans and preaching
safe sex is such a babyface move. =P Super-disturbing entrance
montage aside (never to be described in these pages), he seems to be a
reasonably competent (if not emerald green) wrestler who throws some surprisingly
nasty kicks. Match proper is a heatless clusterfuck until TNR drops
Chocoball and Jado embeds the ladder in his moneymaker with a dropkick.
Much Ladder-Fu ensues until everyone on each side gets a chance at grabbing
the belts and gets stopped. With everyone else staggered Gedo heads up
top, which leads to the big spot of the match- Sena takes the suit off!
GREAT GOOGLY MOOGLY! Gedo is predictably stunned and Fuji takes him
out with a powerbomb, but now it's Shoichi Arai's 17-year-old daughter's
turn to lose her own Sailor Moon school outfit. Ricky goes "Who am
I, Marty Jannetty?" but in the meantime Jado PANTSES Fuji and tosses him
off. Sena tries to stop Jado from climbing the ladder; Jado kicks
her down to some huge heat, but Fuji pushes him off and Sena nuts him on
the way down. Kaoruko takes umbrage with this and before you know
it we've got an underage girl brawling with a porn star in the sleaziest
catfight ever (and BOY does that cover some ground). While this is
going on you've got all six wrestlers literally draped around the ladder,
with Fuji and Gedo on top punching away until Fuji finally drops Gedo and
grabs the belts for the title switch. Match was decent, but I had
to take a shower to cleanse the evil away afterwards.
At this point Shoichi Arai gives the welcome
address, which leads to a really funny bit as Fuyuki comes out dressed
in a tux and mocks Arai with his own welcome speech. They banter
back and forth until Shawn Michaels appears on the FrontierTron and sends
them to their room. FMW IS WMF!
JOSHI SPECIAL TAG HANDICAP MATCH: KAORI
NAKAYAMA/ EMI MOTOKAWA vs. MISS MONGOL /MALIA HOSAKA /JAZZ:
Apparently no one told the American team
that it's CosPlay night in FMW, as Kaori comes out decked up like Sabu
while EMI~! wears a cowgirl outfit. Hosaka cuts the single greatest
Southern Japanese Redneck Nisei promo of all time: "I may have Japanese
blood in my veins, but I'm American-born and American-made and you're fixing
to get an American ass-kicking!" Jazz cuts a far less memorable promo
although this one leads to the one-man "ECW!" chant from some bozo in the
crowd. First half of the match is more or less one long HEAT SEGMENT
on Nakayama until she ducks a chairshot from Mongol and tags in Emi who
goes dropkick-crazy on Mongol and hits a big plancha to the floor on all
three. Nakayama tags back in, uses Tajiri's old "dial cradle" on
Mongol and goes up top to try a tornado DDT, but Mongol turns it into a
Liger bomb. She follows up with the chubbiest rolling bodyblock ever
and tags in Mini-Midnight who hits the Jazz Stinger to no reaction whatsoever.
Jazz slams Kaori and Hosaka goes for a swan dive splash but Kaori moves
and tags Emi back in. Emi slams Hosaka and Kaori hits a moonsault
on her, then goes up top and hits a plancha to the floor on Mongol and
Jazz (who thought she was going to do another moonsault). Back in-ring
Emi slams Hosaka again, and this time she and Kaori do Rolling Thunder
(splash-legdrop combo) off the same turnbuckle onto her. Mongol and
Jazz pull Emi to the floor, but Jazz accidentally slugs Mongol and Kaori
hits a top-rope Diamond Cutter on Hosaka for the pin. OK match, but
the crowd wasn't reacting to anything and they were dying out there by
the end.
JUDO JACKET MATCH: HIDO vs. WILLIE WILLIAMS:
Let's move on, shall we?
WRESTLING DENSHO SPECIAL TAG MATCH:
YOSHINORI SASAKI/ NAOHIRO YAMAZAKI vs. TERRY FUNK/ DORY FUNK JR.:
The Funks come out with some young kid
(Crash Funk? =P) carrying Bruiser Brody's gear, as they dedicate the match
to Brody and say they're not going to lose tonight because of him.
Jeez, like the outcome was in doubt to begin with? This whole match
is deeply on the nostalgia tip as the Funks work all their old 70s spots
(double punch off the ropes, European uppercuts, etc) on the frisky yet
hopelessly outclassed rugrats. Dory works stiff on both guys with
the uppercuts, but it's more than a little sad watching them have to move
right into position to take bumps for Dory like he's fricking Tinieblas
Sr. Funks win at the 15-minute mark with stereo spinning toeholds...
one more thing. Dory really needs to take a hint from Terry and invest
in some long tights. "Ma, Grampa's wrestling in his trunks again
and the neighbors are complaining!"
WEW HARDCORE TITLE MATCH: KINTARO
KANEMURA vs. BALLS MAHONEY:
The FMW goofiness officially kicks into
high gear as Kanemura comes out and does the TNR dance with three old guys
dressed as cheerleaders for the Yakuza. They do some schtick in-ring
for a couple of minutes before Balls comes out and the Japanese Three Stooges
scatter. They soon brawl up the ramp, where Balls whips Kanemura
into some beams resulting in a cheesy explosion and hits a DDT. The
sad thing is that the explosion's bigger than the one they had at the Funk-Cactus
KOTDM final in '95. To the backstage we go, where a TV gets
sledge-hammered and Kanemura gets hiptossed onto the hood of a car.
Kanemura comes back by smashing out the car's windshield with the sledgehammer,
tossing Balls into the car, reaching through the remains of the windshield
and grinding Balls' face into the glass in a neat if highly contrived spot.
Balls comes back after squeezing his fat ass out of the car ("BEEEEEEEEEP!")
by slamming the door on Kanemura's arm, smashing the front window in the
process. They battle on top of the car and Balls powerbombs Kanemura
on the roof for a near-fall, and now both J Taro and the play-by-play man
are losing it, gasping "falls count anywhere!" Balls strolls over
and sets up two tables near the car, giving Kanemura plenty of time to
recover and backdrop Balls into them when he goes for another powerbomb
off the car. They brawl back to the entranceway where Kanemura grabs
a table and a chain; Balls comes back with a fork, but Moe-san gives Balls
a couple of chairshots and Kanemura hits a backdrop on the ramp.
Balls comes back with a backdrop of his own and tries to superkick Kanemura,
but Kanemura moves and Balls kicks the other set of beams. "Ladies
and Gentlemen- SURVIVOR!" Kanemura then chokes out Balls with the
chain, ties him to the table with Moe-san's help, climbs to the top of
the stage and hits the PHAT-ASS SENTON!!! onto Balls from like 20 feet
for the pin to win the title. Balls dragged this one down quite a
bit, although the finish was something else.
At this point they run a video for Ohya
and Kuroda rolling some guy on a city street somewhere, capped off with
Ohya giving the guy the cobra twist. The crowd absolutely eats this
shit up, but fer the love of Mike someone has GOT to explain these
things to me. =) Anyhoo, this leads into:
WEW TAG-TEAM TITLE MATCH: "PSYCHO"
TETSUHIRO KURODA/ HISAKATSU OHYA vs. TOMMY DREAMER/RAVEN:
Kuroda comes down to the ring flanked
by two guys on Harleys, but immediately gets smoked by Ohya's entrance.
It's a beaut, too: Ohya strolls down to ringside pulling a rickshaw
as his manager, singer Tomomi Tanimoto sits inside singing his theme song!
A million billion stars. Raven and Dreamer come out afterwards and
they all rassle or something.
Since this is the live feed, they run something
like 10-15 minutes of Tanaka-Fuyuki history while the cage gets set
up. Man, the footage of Arai getting peed on and sobbing in the bathroom
afterwards is too creepy for words...
WEW HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE/15,000 VOLT CAGE
THUNDERBOLT DEATH MATCH: MASATO TANAKA vs. KODO FUYUKI:
The Thunderbolt cage is a nifty thing
that looks like something out of a mad scientist's labratory, right down
to the electricity coursing up through the "conductors" in each corner;
the FMW roadies helpfully illustrate this point by dimming the house lights
before the thing gets powered up. Still, the cage is set a couple
of feet away from the ring and the ropes are still in place so it's basically
a regular match until someone gets thrown onto the apron. Fuyuki
soon gets tossed onto the apron and Tanaka hits the running elbow; Fuyuki
stays on the ropes after that, but Tanaka climbs up top and hits a legdrop
on Fuyuki who springs backwards into the cage for the first (teeny-weeny!)
explosion. Tanaka hits another elbow as Fuyuki staggers against the
ropes, but as he goes for a third Fuyuki backdrops him into the cage (!)
for an explosion. Fuyuki hits Banana Panic, a NASTY fishermanbuster
and a powerbomb for 2 counts... I'll give Fuyuki his due, he does seem
to work his keister off when it comes to the big shows. Match goes
back-and-forth until Tanaka hits the Diamond Dust for 2. Fuyuki comes
back with a RIPPER of a German Suplex but Tanaka no-sells it and hits a
running elbow for 2. He heads up top but Fuyuki intercepts him, places
him in position for that weird Yone Genjin hold and drops him into a cool
brainbuster for 2. Tanaka gets KO'd by this, which allows Fuyuki
to unscrew all the ropes in one corner in between glomming Tanaka with
the wrench he uses to unscrew them with. Fuyuki chokes Tanaka out
with one of the ropes but only gets a 2-count. Finally Fuyuki goes
to whip Tanaka into the cage; Tanaka reverses and elbows Fuyuki onto the
apron, then gives him a second elbow directly into the transformer for
the explosion. Fuyuki staggers into the ring, where Tanaka hits a
powerbomb for 2. Tanaka goes for the Ro(ar/ll)ing Elbow; Fuyuki blocks
it, hits an uraken and goes for Banana Panic, but Tanaka ducks and hits
the Elbow for 2. They both slap away at each other until they send
each other into the cage at the same time so we get the FMW-mandatory "Everyone
sells the explosion including the ref" death match bump. Fuyuki falls
on top for 2, then both take a 9-count. Fuyuki gets up and goes for
Banana Panic one last time, but Tanaka blocks it and hits the Elbow for
the pin at around 15 minutes to win the WEW title. Postmatch is cool
as Tanaka pretends to be one of Yokohama's Strongest, loading an unconscious
Fuyuki into a conveniently-located garbage truck and driving off merrily
into the night. Really good match, although they probably could've
sold the damage from the cage more than they did. Tanaka does get
brownie points from me for honking the horn as he drives off, because I'm
a goof.
COUNTDOWN MILLENNIUM: H vs. HAYABUSA:
More clips setting up *their* (much cooler
IMO) history, including their super-dorky rookie days. Dying his
hair and putting on the cool pants was easily the best thing Gannosuke
ever did, because I don't think he could've headlined for EAGLE with his
old look. ;) H gets this great "HE'S A WIZARD!!!" entrance,
levitating over the stage entrance and then disappearing into a cloud of
steam (so they don't blow the visual by forcing him to remove the harness).
Of course, Michaels is the "Showstopper" so he actually makes his entrance
AFTER H and Hayabusa make theirs; Hayabusa shows his displeasure
at this by NUTTING Michaels while getting checked out. And we're
off! Hayabusa controls the early stages, taking over after a hot
start by H and controlling him with a headscissors that Michaels actually
makes fairly dramatic by checking H's arm and doing the "arm drops twice"
bit. Hayabusa soon makes the mistake of taking too many liberties
with Michaels, who finally loses it and *toasts* Hayabusa with the superkick.
He then tries to unmask Hayabusa, and H actually has to restrain him from
heading out after Hayabusa. Gannosuke finally says "The hell with
it," unmasks and tosses Michaels the Hayabusa hood. They start to
brawl on the floor (Michaels: "4! 5!" Gannosuke:
"No count!" Michaels: "6!" Crowd: "LOL!") until H lays
him out with a double-underhook powerbomb. He tries to do it again
on the apron, but this time Gannosuke reverses it and gives H a backwards
Fire Thunder to the floor! H sells for a long time while Gannosuke
and Michaels resume their banter from before. Gannosuke controls
the next several minutes until H no-sells a throw-out German suplex and
crushes him with a spin kick. H hits the Falcon Arrow for a near-fall
but Gannosuke comes right back with two straight Gannosuke Clutches.
He follows with a backdrop and goes for a German, but H blocks it with
an Inferno Kick. He hits the Firebird and follows with H Thunder
(rock bottom), both for 2. Gannosuke comes back with a lariat and
a Tiger suplex, then PLANTS H with Fire Thunder for 2. He follows
with the Shinzaki powerbomb and heads up top, but H drops him with a kick
to the head and hits a top-rope Frankenstein. Gannosuke comes back
and charges H, who hits a Dragon suplex; Gannosuke pops right back up but
H pops him with a shotay (huge pop) and hits H Thunder again for 2.
H slams Gannosuke, heads back up top and damn near kills Gannoskue with
the Phoenix Splash, knees-first across Gannosuke's face for the pin at
18-minutesish. Postmatch Micahels gets them to shake hands, puts
them and FMW over on THE STICK, and his music inexplicably plays for good
measure. Michaels takes off, at which point H and Gannosuke make
up for good and the two young wrestlers bask in the afterglow. Good
match, but the crowd was really dead for most of it.
Overall this was a decent show, but Yokohama Arena was probably the wrong place to run it. Or would running it at Bunka have defeated the purpose?
~@~
@#@#@#@#@# DRAMATIC DREAM
TEAM- SECOND ANNUAL JUNIOR TOURNAMENT- 4/27/1999 - HANDHELD
(by DEAN RASMUSSEN)
DDT is quite the Hot Pocket (without all
the cheddar and ham and stuff) of dynamic and versatile Junior Heavyweights,
this is the first pure showcase of these youngsters to hit the shores of
the US, and it's really good. Schneider and Doron both commented
on the relative brevity of the matches making this a less than stellar
showcase- as they are all in the ten minute and under range, but if you
consider that Lucha Tournaments have matches of this length and this style
can be traced directly to all kinds of lucha, I have no problem making
the transition to non-US matches being Nitro-length. The thing I
would have to make as a point of contention is that ALL of these
matches are good, some are REALLY good, but none are MOTYC calibre- which
is about what can be expected from such youngsters UNLESS you think about
the fact that the TORYUMON punks have had longer matches with better results.
But, to be fair to the Dramatic Dream Team, these are really young punks
without the brilliant tutelage of Ultimo Dragon so this is about as fun
as this sleazy indie tourney can get, so I was all over it.
Takashi Sasaki vs. Akinori
Tsukioka:
HEY! HEY! Akinori Tsukioka is one of my
personal faves and he is quite the young good lil worker who is also creating
quite the Highflying Stupid Bumps highlight reel that is becoming quite
formidable in it's scope of chair-smashing and latitude of degree of shoulder-separation.
Meanwhile, Sasaki is part of the DDT GODHEAD of Asian Cougar, Kyohei
Mikami and Takashi Sasaki (Phil Schneider gives mad phat props to Kurokage
also, but we can't just name the entire roster as the Best Of DDT. Kurokage
is very fine also, though.) This match was kinda truncated and Nitro-like,
in that there was a little matwork in the beginning, but it was mostly
Tsukioka getting in his spots before the foray into nearfalls. It
was deeper than the Nitro label in that Akinori is on the offense the entire
time, hitting his bigger and bigger power arsenal- as Sasaki counters out
with cool roll-ups. So they jam a lot of match into a short period
of time. Okinori keeps it focused and driven as he eschews the fabulous
highspots he's not afraid to bring to the table and instead they build
to a finish really well with a Falcon Arrow into a NASTY-landing SkyTwister
(whacking Sasaki right in the face with his knee) to a Tiger driver for
nearfalls, with Sasaki selling it all well enough that the FLASH! counter
roll-up for the three count was actually surprising. It's a good
little match, but was quite the first match on the card. I would
have liked to have seen Tsukioka in the tournament again later, in a match
that would have allowed him to die for my pleasure more. Good little
match though between two good workers.
Kyohei Mikami vs. Tanomusako
Toba:
Toba is the fun-loving, Boxing-glove Bedecked
guy with the Muy Thai Kickboxer gimmick and Mikami is the best worker in
the promotion. Mikami is pretty tiny but makes up for it spunk, skill and
tenacity. Mikami first caught my eye as a graceful highflyer on an
Onita Pro match and, here, he goes all shootstyle on Toba and it's really
good for a few minutes there as they really punch each other really hard
and build the match around Toba trying to land a knockout punch and Mikami
eating him alive on the mat. Toba gets in some big punches early-
but the gloves ruin it. I mean I and everybody watching will have
seen Yuki Ishikawa dole the same level of ass-kicking without gloves, so
the gloves look pansy-assed in the Pro Style Setting. Either way,
Mikami punches him in the ribs a lot on the ground, so I adored this, needless
to say. Toba does other cool things like flipping over and punching
out of a Cross-Armbreaker that Makami had flown into like a testosterone-drenched
Reiko Amano or something. After almost punching out of the second
Cross-Armbreaker, Makami turns it into a Triangle Hold to make the scrawny
little bastard TAP!- which was pretty neato. Toba is more fun in
other matches I've seen him in as he sort of grew into his Scrawny Little
Bastard roll really well by the time the other DDT HH comes along- but
that's for next weeks SECOND MUCH BIGGER DOSE OF DDT to hit in DVDVR #115.
At a CyberNewstand NEAR YOU! Next ot all that PORN!
Asian Cougar vs. Super Cacao:
Cougar is king-sized for Indie scum- he's
got the cool assed yellow, frayed pants and the totally styling Black/Yellow
with decorative Canji mask- and he's got the crazy highspots onto chairs
and cool ass legdrop variations and THAT COATING of pseudo-Lucha Puroresu
indie that makes him underground and caustic and beyond cool. People who
are down with Asian Cougar are hip and those who aren't are wrestle SQUARES,
DADDY! The rubes haven't co-opted him yet (though he isn't as cool as the
unco-optable Akinori and Yamakawa, who is there for YOU the Fellow Pathetic
Puroresu Indie Freak and YOU alone.) Super Cacao is all over
that CMLL Japan we're reviewing in DVDVR #115 and this match is all about
the Lucha as they do lotsa midgrade armdrags and elaborate lucha spots,
as the unmasked Cacao is quite proficient if not overly graceful with his
highflying and basic lucha trappings. The trappings I speak of- the
armdrags and headscissors- demand more grace and precision than Cacao can
bring to make them spectacular and transcendent (for the Spectactular Example,
SEE: Early Angel Azteca, Valodor, and Rencor Latino). The great ones take
it BEYOND the scope of being the "first part of the match leading up to
the highspots and the finish" and make it beautiful and elegant and spine-tingling.
They make it the ART of Lucha Libre. Either way, after a slight foray into
lucha, Asian Cougar does a legdrop off the apron and then they go to the
finish. This was quite the Worldwide 1998 match- which isn't good
enough for tapes travelling across the ocean to my VCR and it isn't enough
for me to be excited about and isn't good enough to be a match to include
Asian Cougar. Cacao busts out the UD/WAR Springboard second-rope
plancha after a moment of hesitation for his big highspot. Not very
long at all. The major saving grace is that this match is the beginning
of the matches where the Hottest Ref In The World starts reffing.
Ponytails are SOOOOOO sexy...WOO-HOO! She does need a sammich though.
Onryo vs. Mitsunobu Kikuzawa:
Onryo is DEAD! HE is the LIVING DEAD!
Onryo is the pinnacle of indie-idiot highflying as he fearlessly doesn't
hit a single highspot without landing in some impossible, neck-crushing
position. Kikuzawa is the Best Johnny Grunge Ever- a big chubbed-out
seeedy youngster with a nice dropkick and nice twisting moonsault
senton. I'm starting to dig Onryo for a couple of reasons beyond
the fact that he is DEAD! He wrestles Lucha Muta- all deliberate
but with a tricked-out armdrag here, a comically self-detroying plancha
there. I dig the way that his Muta-aping slows down the usual Japanese
Junior match to the point that they work an armbar section that works into
an armdrag exchange where the armbar section builds up the sudden
pop of the Armdrag section for a big cool FOCUS on the spot- sort
of like working up to a highspot, thus it infuses a non-Lucha psychology
into a rote Lucha spot. Actually, this match is pretty inventively
derivative (if that phrase makes any sense. Think all post-modern
and shit)- as Onryo works on the knee of Kikuzawa as if to somewhere down
the line slap on the figure-four and the Indian Deathlock With A Bridge.
Kikuzawa acquits himself well as he gets the offensive Transition with
a SWANK DiBiase Powerslam into a Falcon Arrow, then makes with the Aforementioned
Twisting Senton Moonsault. After getting on the semi-offense with
a FOULE!!! Onryo takes a Jackhammer and rolls through a roll-up for the
FLASH! pin. This was good. Maybe Onryo at the J-Cup won't be
as preposterous as it seems. Kikuzawa has a future also. Kikuzawa
pays homage to his US Indie brethren by throwing in a really shitty People's
Elbow just like in a match RIGHT NOW! in some high school gym somewhere
in the heartland of America- as American Sycho (one half of the Quad
City WildSide) will eventually beat Bret Ice Cold Nash with a Diamond Cutter
at 25:34.
Asian Cougar vs. Takashi
Sasaki:
DDT GODHEAD MEETS DDT GODHEAD! For
4:56! One big over-the-toprope legdrop and 35 nearpinfalls and we
call it a match. THIS IS A SEMI-FINAL? Not that it wasn't an action-packed
4:56. Asian Cougar becomes Asian Violencia bumping like a motherfucking
freak as Sasaki- the overly-intense, cycling-pants bedecked true Junior
with the SWANK~! power arsenal- drop kicks Cougar off of the top turnbuckle
and does an over-the-toprope dropkick through the chairs. Sasaki hits the
ugliest-landing Brainbuster I've seen in a while, which he follows up with
a beautiful Spinning Northern Lights Bomb. Cougar fights out of Superplex
attempt with assorted elbows and Sasaki is in perfect position for the
funtabulously elaborate Guillotine off the ringpost throught the top rope
to the floor. Three legdrop variations, a batch of cool roll-ups
and prepopsterous Rings Of Saturn Variation submission hold and they call
it a match. 15 minutes and I think you would have a really good match.
Sasaki is really good and so is Asian Cougar. They should have had
more confidence in them to go longer. I dunno.
Onryo vs Kiyohei Mikami:
Ah! this is more like it. if the
final wasn't so balls out, THIS would be the best match on the card.
Onryo and Mikami bring the fricxkin' PAIN in this baby- as Onryo further
show evidence that he can- more than likely- look really good dying a horrible,
crumpled death at the Super J in April as a representative of Wrestle Dream
and the INdie Walking Dead. I was talking to fellow Death Valley
Knucklehead- Phil Schneider and we were pondering Onryo's amazingly suicidal
tendencies and Phil seemed to think that Onryo was of the same mindset
as Psicosis in those Tijuana matches where he would seem to try break his
own spinal column. I'm of a much more severe school of Onryo Analysis.
I think he is a MARK! to his own GIMMICK! and he REALLY wants to die in
a match and attempt to resurrect himself three days later. As evidence,
I offer up THIS: after Mikami does the Plancha to nowhere- surely a goofy
and dangerous bump by itself- ONRYO decides that he CANNOT LIVE ANYMORE-
and does a FRICKIN' Springboard Somersault Plancha TO MOTHERFUCKING NOWHERE!
Right on his powdery, uncombed head! In two matches, in front of
120 people at a DDT show, Onryo bumps like Jeff Hardy on heavy depressants-
including landing DIRECTLY ON HIS SHOULDER WRONG and LANDING DIRECTLY ON
HIS HEAD WRONG- in as many consecutive matches. Think of it
this way: the Super J Cup will be REALLY high profile, while this
HH only saw the light of day because Doron has some weird inside connections;
The J-Cup will be on GAORA and will have a Commercial tape and everything.
I see Onryo sawing off own arms in mid-air right before setting off the
nailbomb strapped around his waist as he jobs to Sasuke the Great in the
first round. Mikami does his part to cripple himself in front of
the DDT faithful- as he does a diving headbutt right into Onryo's uplifted
feet and Mikami takes it right across the throat, mangling his scrawny
neck in the process. Onryo shows that his offense is more than just a personal
living car-crash reenactment as he busts out the lucha roll-ups and assorted
mid-grade powerbombs and powerbombs for hot nearfalls. Mikami hits
a bunch of Urican/Enzuguiri combos that set up the roll-up for the the
big win and we are set for the big final. WOO-HOO!
Takagi/ Exciting Yoshida/Kurokage
vs. Yasaku/Daisaku/Kengo Takai:
Exciting Yoshida isn't very good- NOOO
not at all. Kurokage doesn't do much in this, though his Kanemoto-via-Sayama
stuff is pretty fun-loving. I figure I'll need to use up my "Phone
- Calls - To - Schneider - As - Actual - Content - And - Analysis" quota
next week. Let's just say that this was better than your usual WAR or IWA
Japan Heavyweight time-killer. Takagi is fun as Japan Indie Scum
Stone Cold Steve Austin. The other three are anyone's guess.
Asian Cougar vs Kiyohei
Mikami:
This was the Tournament final and this
was pretty great- as they held back all their big spots for this- but it
STILL under ten minutes which is INSANITY. Mikami is fucking GREAT
on the mat and makes with the beautiful mutated Minoru Tanaka-esque Luchashootaresu
Mat bastardizations- including the SUPERfreaked out roll-up for the pin.
Cougar is king-sized with the big Guillotines he was saving, including
the one over the toprope off the the apron to the floor and really nasty
one in combination with a dropkick that looked hurty as all hell.
Mikami hits the cool Face-buster on the apron straight into the Hurricanrana
on the floor. Asian Cougar counters with a Reverse Springboard Rolling
Senton to the floor. Mikami goes with the wacky roll-ups and gets
the pin and I'm wondering if this was brilliantly edited by crack 1980s
AJW TV post-production geniuses because your FINAL should be longer than
the match before it that was there to kill time.
Either way, this is pretty cool. I wish the matches were longer, but it is a batch of good wrestling by a very super-promising crew of youngsters, so you should get this. Yes. Get this. I wish the matches were longer.
~#~
~!~
!@!@!@!@!@GAEA G! Panic!
(by REV RAY DUFFY)
We join Meiko Satomura in the studio,
everyone's celebrating, so I think this is probably the first show after
GAEA was won back the promotion following Double Destiny.
Etsuko Mita /Mima Shimoda
/Lioness Aska /Sonoko Kato vs. Meiko Satomura /KAORU /Toshiyo Yamada /Chigusa
Nagoya:
This starts with Mita and Chigusa working
the mic. We jump into the match and it's the Crush Gals going at
it. Lioness gets control and locks in the Scorpion Deathlock. Chigusa
rope saves and Kato is tagged in. Kato gets in a few moves on Chigusa.
Kato gets into trouble and Lioness drops Chigusa. The battle transfers
to the Protoge Crush Gal melt down as Kato and Satomura mix it up for a
bit. Mita tries for her off the second rope electric chair suplex,
but Satomura counters it with the cross armbreaker. We get some of
the usual LCO chair play. The big story of this match is the continuing
cracks in the Super Star Unit. It becomes clear that Mita and Shimoda
have not made this match a high priority to them and it shows when Lioness
is being pinned or going for a pin, only Kato is running in to cut off
the GAEA squad. This results in the funny site of Kato holding Yamada,
Satomura and Nagoya in the corner by herself as Lioness hits the Towerhacker
Bomb on KAORU only to have the pin broken up when the GAEA team tosses
Kato off into the pile. Kato tries her best to take out Satomura
with the version of the Lioness spin kick, the Dragon suplex and Crown's
Gate, but eventually, she gets caught in the DVB by Satomura and it's over
as the GAEA team cuts off Lioness and the LCO just sort of stand there.
Post match, Mita and Shimoda have nasty things to say about Lioness on
the microphone. And the Super Star Unit is reduced to 2. Mita
and Shimoda put an exclaimation point on this by stomping Lioness's custom
indestructable table. Then... to rub salt into the wound, Nostrodomus
come out to talk shit and Lioness AND the GAEA team.
It appears as though the longhair commentator
has a Val Venis t-shirt on in this episode.
Mayumi Ozaki/Akira Hokuto
vs. Meiko Satomura/Chigusa Nagoya:
Nostrodomus attacks at the bell and this
goes to the floor. Hokuta does assorted chokes and hair pulls early
on Meiko. There's a neat bit where Meiko's crawling to make the tag
to Chigusa and Ozaki cuts it off by stepping on her hand and making fun
of Nagoya. It appears that since Hokuto has lost a step since giving
birth to Satan's spawn, so she's resulting to heel heat/psychology rather
than her former dynamic moves. There's a weird segment in this where
it looks like Satomura clearly makes a tag, but it's waved off for some
reason. Chigusa finally makes the tag, but ends up in a 4 way stomp
down as Sugar and Chikago run in. Chigusa gets on the scorpion on
Ozaki, Akira tries to break it up, but Meiko attacks her and puts her into
the Boston crab. Sugar and Chikayo run in and Uematsu and Hirota
cut them off and put them in boston crabs as well before Tommy Ran makes
everyone break up the holds. Both Chigusa and Satomura get sent to
the floor. Hokuto hits a dive off the post. Both Chigusa and
Satomura gets chairs broken on their heads and do a double blade job following
some posting action. This is followed by Hokuto working over the
wound on Chigusa's head in ring. Chigusa makes the tag to a bloody
Meiko who takes some minor stuff before knocking down Hokuta and hitting
a slingshot double stomp. She works the cross armbreaker and then
goes kick crazy on Hokuto, but she makes a mistake and gets hit with a
near dangerous back drop by Hokuto. She's on the receiving end of
some double teams by Oz and Akira. Oz goes up top, Meiko tries to
get in cross arm breaker off the ropes, but Oz hands on until Chigusa kicks
her off the ropes. Ozaki gets to play super ball as Chigusa and Meiko
give up forearm uppercuts and kicks leading to a Meiko DVB. They
do fight over finishers back and forth with Meiko and Oz as Akira holds
of Chigusa on the floor. Ozaki gets hit with the backflip kick and
a DVB, but the Ozettes make the save. They hold up Meiko for Oz to
hit about 50 urakens and then she falls victim to the Tequila Sunrise.
It was a very sports entertainment type ending. The ending sucked
with all the run ins. Akira seems to be more about psychology more
than spots, so if you're longing for the old high workrate Akira, you might
want to wait awhile to see if she gets back into her old form.
Our next egments is clips of Chikayo Nagashima
v. Chigusa Nagoya. The clips are pretty much of Nagashima getting
destroyed by Chigusa including having some chairs broken on her head.
Chigusa sets up a chair over her body and takes a seat, daring the other
Ozettes to try to retreive their falled companion. As the ring announcer
comes out to announce the next match, Chigusa drags her victim out to the
floor as Lioness Aska and Sonoko Kato come out for their match with Ozaki
and Hokuto. This leads to a goofy segment with Chigusa holding up
Chikayo against the rail as Chigusa mimes in a Wisconsin accent "Oh gee
golly, look at this fine beauty I bagged me here. She's gonna look great
mounted over my fireplace in the den." Lioness looks on with a smirk
as Chigusa claps along to Lioness' theme music. Of course Ozaki and
Hokuto look less than pleased at what has happened to Nagashima and immediately
charge Chigusa, only to be jumped by Kato/Aska. Aska beats on Ozaki
early. Kato brings a table into the ring only to have Akira drop
kick it so she falls under it, then to have Aska laid out on the table
and for Ozaki to double stop Aska. Nostrodomus beats up on Kato some
and she blades and plays Ricky Morton as Oz and Akira bite, punch, claw,
kick and stomp her in the head. Kato finally makes the tag after
Aska kicks Akira in the back of the head. Akira tries to fight out
of the giant swing, but Aska holds her down for Kato to drop the top rope
leg dro p and then hits the swing. Akira gets put under the table
and stomped. Lioness softens up Akira with some powerbomb and tags
to Kato. Kato goes for the Dragon suplex, but when Akira won't go
over, Aska runs in and accidentally drops Kato with a lariat. Ozaki
crushes Kato with a powerbomb but pulls her up at two, then does it again
after Akira spikes a second bomb. Aska runs in with her chain, but
gets hit first and drops it, leading to Ozaki knocking her out of the ring
with a few chain assisted urakens. Hokuto then hits Aska with the
somersault dive off the post. Nostrodomos bust up Lioness with the
chain on the floor. When Chigusa tries to save her ex partner, she
gets attacked by the Ozettes and a brawl breaks out between the GAEA crew
and the Oz Academy. Lioness are chained to the ringpost as Kato is
on the receiving end of several dangerous backdrops, a powerbomb before
falling to the Northern Lights Bomb. Post match, Nostrodomos talk
shit on the mic as both their enemies are left laying. Akira also
questions Tommy Ran on some of her counts.
Highlights from the High
Spurt 600 tournament are shown.
Kaori Nakayama vs. Meiko
Satomura :
Satomura does a neat move where she uses
a missed high roundhouse kick to set up a crossarm breaker. Kaori
scores a near fall by hitting a captured suplex as a counter to a kick.
There's a bunch of counters and flying and stuff, but Kaori gets caught
in a cross armbreaker and taps.
Toshiyo Yamada vs. Sugar
Sato:
Yamada puts this one away quick as Sugar
counters one kick with a dragon screw, but eats a spinning hook kick and
a reverse gory special bomb to win in 26 seconds.
Chikayo Nagashima vs. KAORU
:
This was kind of neat as it looks like
Chikayo is turning into a German suplexing machine in this match.
KAORU gets in an Argentine Backbreaker, but Chikayo counters it into a
cross arm breaker, Which KAORU eventual powers out of. This was clippified
and went 9 minutes, with KAORU winning with two running Excaliburs.
Satomura vs. Yamada :
This is majorly clippified. Satomura
wins in 4'44" after 3 consecutive DVB's.
Mayumi Ozaki vs. Yoshie Uematsu
:
Again with the clipification. Toshie
bleeds following some knuckles tot he head by Ozaki. This is back
and forth, but Oz puts it out in 4 minutes with the running Lyger Bomb.
RIE vs. Sonoko Kato :
Clips. RIE fights out of a top rope
Kamakazi attempt to hit a diving knee. RIE fights out of two Crown's
Gate attempts but gets caught with a dragon suplex allowing Kato to advance.
Sakura Hirota vs. Akira Hokuto
:
Sakura comes out dressed as Hokuto with
a baby carriage and all. She does some impersonations of Akira which
Akira doesn't take kindly to. Akira wins in about 1'26" with the
strangle hold gamma and then whacks Hirota with her fake baby.
Mayumi Ozaki vs. Sonoko Kato
:
Kato blocks Ozaki's uraken attempt, hits
the Lioness spin kick and Crown's Gate for two and then a top rope leg
drop for two. Oz gets in control and its a fisherman buster,
but Lioness runs in and mists Ozaki, allowing Kato to hit the Dragon Suplex
for the win.
Akira Hokuto vs. Chigusa
Nagoya :
Ozettes set up Chigusa on the floor for
a plancha, then out of the blue, RIE runs in and plancha's Chigusa, turning
on the GAEA squad. Akira hits a top rope drop kick which Chigusa
no sells and then hits two Death Valley Bombs. They trade some near
falls until Chigusa catches Akira in a Straggle Hold Gamma set up into
an arm lock for the win.
The show raps up with a recap of the final 4 for the High Spurt Tournament which are Satomura, KAORU, Kato and Nagoya. The show ends with the run down of the upcoming events and the GAEA all purpose neck clip.
Overall, it was a bit too much on the clipification for me on some of the matches. There was a lot of angles done in the show too, which took away from some the wrestling.
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
NEW THEME: INTERPROMOTIONAL
WARS OF HATE!!!
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
ATSUSHI ONITA/TARZAN GOTO
vs. GENICHIRO TENRYU/ASHURA HARA- WRESTLE AND ROMANCE-3/2/94, Tokyo Sumo
Hall)- (PETE STEIN):
The brief FMW-WAR, well, war, kicked off
with this INSANELY hot tag match highlighted by the "first confrontation"
between Onita and Tenryu. Match starts off with Goto trying to pull
something good out of the worthless Hara, but Goto immediately realizes
that it's a lost cause and deposits Hara on the floor where all four briefly
go at it. Tenryu tags in but Goto drops him with a Kunze Armbar mutation
and Tenryu tags Hara back in. Onita tags in for the first time and
Hara tags in Tenryu- POP!!! Tenryu and Hara start to go nuts on Onita,
who blades about a zillion times off Hara's headbutts and a post job, and
Tenryu joins the fun by giving the cut some dick kicks while Onita lies
on the apron. It's funny because Tenryu's working heel in his own
group against the INDY SCUM from FMW... it gets even funnier as Onita slaps
a figure-four on Tenryu only for Hara to work the cut over some more to
NUCLEAR heat. Onita finally ducks a corner charge from Hara and tags
Goto who chops Hara's chest raw. Onita tags back in and hits a FUCKING
MISSILE DROPKICK on Hara- I don't think he'd hit one of those in at least
10 years. Tenryu tags back in and he and Hara hit a sandwich
lariat on Onita. Tenryu follows with the powerbomb, but Goto breaks
up the pin and Tenryu replies by destroying him on the floor. He
starts to climb back in, but Onita's recovered and plants him with a DDT
as he steps through the ropes. Hara tags back in, but while he and
Onita go at it Goto sneaks around and CRUSHES Tenryu with a chairshot.
Goto heads back in and trades lariats with Hara, then tags Onita in who
hits a backdrop on Hara. Goto follows with a splash off the top,
Onita adds a top-rope headbutt to Hara's ribcage and Hara starts to sell
the ribs like crazy. Tenryu isn't gonna be much help, as he's juicing
off the Goto chairshot and out on his feet. Onita hits a second backdrop,
but Hara finally makes the tag to Tenryu and heads to the floor to have
his ribs taped up. Tenryu hits the enzuigiri and the top-rope elbow,
but Goto saves Onita. Tenryu gives Goto some "IHATEYOU IHATEYOU IHATEYOU!"
punches, but Goto tosses him out, clears the announcers' table and gives
Tenryu a face-first piledriver on the table. Goto tosses him back
inside, where Onita hits a DDT and follows with the TFPB. Tenryu
kicks out and Hara tries to save him, but he gets tossed back out and both
Onita and Goto ram him ribs-first into the post. Tenryu tries to
come back with a pair of enzuigiris, but Onita no-sells the second one
and sets Tenryu up for another top-rope splash from Goto. Tenryu
comes back with a lariat and charges Goto on the apron, but Goto kicks
him right in the face and Onita hits a backdrop for 2. Tenryu comes
back with a koppo kick slaps on an abdominal stretch while Hara tries to
restrain Goto, but Goto gets away and hits an enzuigiri(!) on Tenryu to
break the hold. Tenryu ducks a second enzuigiri try, but in doing
so he sets himself up in TFPB position for Onita, who drops Tenryu on his
head on the first try but hits it on the second for the win at 19 minutes.
Really fun Onita match, as he and Goto were working their asses off and
the crowd was collectively wetting themselves for everything. I never
want to see Hara again and I shudder to think how huge of a problem he
had that Giant-fricking-Baba couldn't even cover up for him...
Genchiro Tenryu vs. Atsushi
Onita- Frontier Martial-Arts Wrestling- Exploding Barbed Wire Cage
Match- Kawasaki Stadium-5/5/94- (DEAN RASMUSSEN):
Hey! This is the big pay-off to the ill-fated
WAR/FMW marriage and this was a beautiful way to go out. I remember
the first time I saw this. It was the same week as my first viewing
of Funk vs Onita No-ropes Barbed-wire and I remember being impressed by
this match and thinking that the Funk/Onita match was really great.
Five years later, I'm switching horses. This match is even better
than I remember and it has relevance to the resurgence of watchable deathmatches
from Japan, because this was DEEPLY a wrestling match first, with gimmicks
used as support for the main framing of the psychology of the match.
The beginning is both trying to throw the other into exploding barbed-wire
after working out of the headlock. Onita goes into it first and it
is Tenryu's first offensive transition, as he uses the advantage to take
Onita to the mat and work on his leg. After Tenryu-like stiff kicks
to the knee joint and kneedrops on the knee, Teryu slaps on the Figure-four.
Onita's strongest suit is selling and he sells the damage like a master-
fighting for the ropes that aren't there for a break that won't come in
a deathmatch, so he struggles to reverse it and escape the hold.
Tenryu starts pummeling the weepy Onita and hits a Vertical Suplex! for
a two-count. Tenryu goes to an Octapus Hold after a weak preliminary
Stuff Powerbomb, but Onita escapes more ass-beating from Tenryu by ducking
a Lariat thus throwing Tenryu headfirst into the exploding barbed-wire
cage and thus Onita goes into his Blue-Print For A Hundred FMW Matches
That Would Follow when he hits a Thunder Fire Powerbomb to weaken Tenryu
and fights for the second to finish him. When Tenryu kicks out, Onita procures
the Sleeper that Tenryu kicks out of by kicking Onita reight in the face.
Onita goes for some running headbutts and Tenryu throws him face
first into the cage and goes back on offense, kicking Onita in the face
with the tender mercy that Tenryu always shows when kicking an opponent
Right In the Motherfucking Face (as in, "hey, Genchiro, why don't you just
rub my face in the barbed-wire and then pour Texas Pete on top. It
wouldn't hurt as much.") Another Stuff Powerbomb for two and the
crowd is rabid, a third and face first into the exploding barbed-wire and
it's curtains, but Tenryu sells the previous damage to allow a a roll-up
by Onita to pop the crowd! Tenryu REALLY punts Onita right in the face
and hits Stuff PowerBomb #4 for two and down to math at this point as five
does the trick. I liked how the structure of the match effectively
uses the hideous gimmicks but doesn't rely on them at all. The point
that this match may have been just as good without the exploding barbed-wire
doesn't hold water, I don't think, because Onita wouldn't look credible
going into his offense without Tenryu going into the barbed-wire.
It's this point of psychology that made the finish in question and added
to the hotness of the finish. This is one of the best Onita matches
and a great FMW match and is a great prototype of how to effectively build
a good all-around Death Match with actual wrestling elements- which I guess
is key to any successful match.
_+_+_+_+_+_+_ "Debunking
Interpromotionality"- (TONY GANCARSKI):
Like every other fat tenement redneck whiteboy in the 80s, I went to the
local supermarket -- Piggly Wiggly, in my case -- and either read the Aptermags
while sitting in front of the magazine rack or stuffed them into my pants
for perusal at home. Despite all their flaws, PWI and their ilk were useful
tools to get me thinking more concretely about the possibilities inherent
in pro wrestling. What if I could become a midget wrestler and step into
the arena V Lord Littlebrook? What if I could become an apartment wrestler
and wrestle in a three-way dance? What if WWF or AWA wrestlers could somehow
wrestle the people I saw on TV every week in the Carolinas?
The first two questions aren't really grist for the current DVDVR, of course.
I knew that sometimes wrestlers from other
promotions actually came south to wrestle NWA folks. Flair and Backlund
went at it in '82 in the Omni, for example. But there was always a whiff
of gimmickry about those matches. You never saw them on TV, for the obvious
reason that neither promotion could agree about who should have rights
to the footage. And the matches never really had clean finishes, either.
DCORs, DDQs, and other creative finishes left openings for booker to never
have to construct ends to the stories they told.
Once the McMahon expansion began, of course,
cooperation in that relatively giving spirit was at an end. An air of entrenchment
permeated the regional promotions of the south, as the good old boys came
to realize that every one of their crown jewels were being purloined for
the glossy, yet cheap, setting of the Titan midcard. As the 80s made their
grim progression, we saw folks like the Batten Twins pushed as maineventers
in places like St. Louis that once saw Brody and DiBiase rock the house.
Interpromotional matches started rearing their ugly heads during the talent
depletion. Verne Gagne, who only had so many sons and so many ugly daughters
to service the locker room, wanted to work with people -- any people. Of
course, there was no way he could have his heat magnets put anyone over,
so the AWA/NWA cooperation went nowhere fast. Similar glib summaries can
be written for the efforts of Jerry Jarrett and Fritz Von Erich in this
regard, with the highlight of the 80s as far as US interpromotionality
went being that Jerry Jarrett won the WCCW from Fritz in a friendly game
of poker. Or maybe it was the other way around.
The 90s weren't much better. To pull house
show gates out of the single digits, Jim Cornette's SMW went head to head
with the USWA. Old-school wrestling, natch, given that most of the workers
that hadn't escaped to Atlanta or CT at that point were best seen with
blindfolds on. Perhaps I pan it too hard. Do I have to remind anyone of
the NWA invasion of the WWF?
So, in short, I come to bury the issue's
theme. Consider me a Banquo's ghost as far as that goes. When wrestling
promoters and wrestlers learn to think long term and learn not to worry
about someone siphoning their heat and so on and so forth, then I'll get
excited. Until then, interfederational matches stand most prominently as
proof of human venality. Whipass!
@@@@@@@@ Akira Maeda/ Yoshiaki
Fujiwara/ Osamu Kido/ Nobuhiko Takada/ Kazuo Yamazaki vs. Antonio Inoki/
Tatsumi Fujinami/ Kengo Kimura/ Umanosuke Ueda/ Kantaro Hoshino -3/26/86-(PHIL
SCHNEIDER):
This was after the failure of the first
UWF, and was a battle between the returning wrestlers and the defenders
of the New Japan tradition. This had one of the hottest crowds I think
I have ever seen. As a rule I don't buy people who rate matches high, because
the crowd was hot, but the action in this match played off the emotion
of the crowd so well, that the fan enthusiasm was an integral part. This
was an elimination match, where eliminations could come by being forced
to the floor, this allowed eliminations without having to do pinfall or
submission jobs. This match went 35+ minutes and had a lot of great work
before the first elimination, unfortunately Yamazaki was the first UWF
guy eliminated as he is one of the better workers. The best work of the
early part of the match was when Fujinami and Maeda were in together, which
is no surprise because they had one of the best singles matches ever. Takada
also looked good. Ueda (who looks like a cross between Tarzan Goto and
Tatsushi Goto) was used really well, he was the aging legend who couldn't
compete anymore, but wanted to fight for the honor of the company. Every
time he tagged in the crowd went apeshit, but he would tag out with out
making contact. The match came down to Maeda + Kido and Takada v. Inoki
and Ueda (When Fujinami got eliminated, leaving it 3 on 2 with Ueda as
one of the NJ boys, I cringed it looked like Dustnoki was lining up the
three big UWF stars for the bionic elbow). Ueda tags in for the first time
to face the most dangerous UWF wrestler Maeda, and sort of bowls into him
taking them both to the floor, and sacrificing himself to the roar of the
crowd, very cool booking and a good use of a worker who would jeopardize
the match quality if used differently. This also allowed for the
New Japan win, while still heavily protecting Maeda. It was then
Inoki versus Kido and Takada and it was a foregone conclusion, both guys
get a near fall or two, before falling to Antonio, but you didn't get the
sense that either had a legitimate shot of beating him, especially Kido
who ended up in at the end. Very good match, which reminded me of the Canadian
Stampede, where booking and heat elevated a match with some poor workers
(Neidhart and the LOD and Ueda, Inoki and Fujiwara respectively), I would
have like to see Inoki eliminated via the floor, and have Fujinami get
the New Japan win, but the crowd was clamoring for Antonio, so that wasn't
going to happen. Great, great match that has got me inspired to get my
hands on some old UWF.
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THE CONTINUED SPOTLIGHT
DANCE: GREAT MUTA!
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GREAT
MUTA vs. HIROSHI HASE-12/14/1992- Osaka Furitsu Gym- (PETE
STEIN):
It just so happens that Rev Ray went over
their first matchup in DVDVR previous; you, the gentle reader, might remember
that Hase bled like a stuck pig at Muta's hands. Remember that.
JIP at the 10-minute mark as Hase hits a sweet German suplex on Muta for
2 and turns into Arn Anderson, ripping Muta's eyes against the ropes.
Muta heads out and tosses a chair into the ring which Hase and Tiger Hattori
fight over; Hase says "GIMME CHAIR!" and kicks Tiger in the gut, but Muta
grabs the chair and lays Hase out with it. He goes for the moonsault
right away but Hase crotches him on the ropes and gives him a lariat.
Muta pulls a KNIFE from under the ring and heaves a second chair inside.
Hase punks Tiger again for the chair, sees Muta with the knife and goes
"AH CRAP! Forget the chair!" He runs over, steals the knife
and gives Muta the Oriental Spike in the truest sense of the word, and
YE GODS does Muta hit the All-Time Super Ooey-Gooey Bubbling Crude of Blood
juice-job. The crowd's about to lose their collective lunch over
this, and they go nuts when Hase bites at the gash and comes up with his
entire torso coated in Muta's blood. Muta reverses a whip into the
corner and goes for the handspring elbow but misses, and Hase goes back
on offense. He slaps a regular sleeperhold on Muta off a rope whip
and the crowd actually pops for this, no doubt using the carny logic that
Muta's gonna fucking DIE if all the blood really *does* rush to his head
if someone puts a sleeper on him. Hase finally leaves the cut alone
and works on Muta's legs with a Scorpion. He hits Muta with a kick
to the head off the ropes, but Muta shakes it off and poses to a big pop.
Hase hits two more kicks like this, but on the fourth try Muta ducks and
hits a backdrop. He poses, hits 3 more backdrops and goes for the
moonsault, but this time Hase rolls out of the way. Hase eventually
struggles up and hits the uranage on Muta for 2, then adds a powerbomb
for another 2-count. He goes for the uranage again but Muta reverses
it into a Dragon Suplex for 2. By now Muta's starting to look like
Bull Nakano with the blood in his hair making it stick out all over the
place. He Mutas up and hits a second Dragon; Hase again kicks out
at 2, but he's got nothing left in the tank. Muta hits the backbreaker
and finally hits the moonsault for the pin at 23:04. Really good
storyline match as they played off the 1990 bloodbath, and an OK wrestling
match even with the gargantuan amount of blood.
Super Black Ninja v. Invader
1- WORLD WRESTLING COUNCIL- PUERTO RICO 1987- (DEAN
RASMUSSEN) :
In case you were wondering where the Great
Muta ever learned how to weild such magic with a tiny corner of a razor
blade, remember that one of New Japan's training grounds back in the day
was the NWA affiliate in Puerto Rico- and here he shows the roots to his
grotesquely flamboyant sputtering Bladejobs To Come in this little hideous
gem from the lil Commonwealth of the US. There once was a time when
sending your young prospect from Japan to other hemispheres was a GOOD
idea and they would come back a better wrestler (as opposed to the Yuji
Nagata Experience!) and the main thing Mutoh learned in Puerto Rico was
twofold- from his great TNTmatch, he learned some finer points of how to
work PR Pro-Style which is rock solid Pro Style and he has used the elements
of that experience in all of his great matches, and- from this match- he
learned to do whatever it takes to get over with the crowd. This
crowd could give a shit where your from- if you can't look like are legitimately
beating the shit out of someone, they will turn on you AND the match, forcing
you to go home with old daipers sticking to the back your head. Luckily
for everyone involved, the Larval Muta brings the ass-stomp in this and
BOY! is it fun! Dressed for a Texas Deathmatch with his Levis and
Cowboy boots, Mutoh blends in well to the wild-assed brawls that pock Puerto
Rico's glorious Lucha history, eschewing basic amatuer and Carny holds
to instead do his best Dick Murdock impersonation- mauling invader with
his own WWC Championship belt as the match starts. Invader;s mask
is already puddling up as we reach the first minute and they take it to
the fairground field and Muta makes the mask-bloodpuddle bigger with chairshots
and assorted Ringpostings. From here, he REALLY assumes the roll
of Texas Ass-Stomper- pounding the bleeding skull of Invader with fabulous
stiffness. Invader hits a REALLY GREAT Mark Mosely punt to Mutoh's
groin and we have our first big offensive transition for Invader.
WELCOME TO PUERTO RICO, MOTHERFUCKER- as they say. After hitting
the floor again, Invader drops him across the wooden barricade and Mutoh
WHIPS OUT THE BLADE LIKE HE IS MUTHA FUKKIN RAY THE CRIPPLER STEVENS or
something and starts chewing on Invaders forehead. Very little of
the white is left of his white mask. Mutoh foules Invader while being
pelted by debris and camera is awash with blood! MUTA STARTS HERE!
Mutoh gets the Muta glazed look in his eyes as the blood coats his face
and he is strangling Invader with a camera cable. Invader
kicks out of Moonsault and they go to a Sleeper simply to show the blood
spewing out of the participants skulls- it seems. After Mutoh throws
both of them over the toprope and they sell the damage, Mutoh becomes TOTAL
MURDOCK and starts beating the hapless, blood-drenched Invader with a belt-
which the wily Luchadore grabs and holds as he hits his SECOND BIG OFFENSIVE
TRANSITION- a Mark Moseley Punt to the groin. From here they go all
Memphis and punch each other in the face for five minutes and await the
screwjob finish. El Profe distracts the Invader as Mutoh grabs
the breifcase, but Invader sniffs it out and hits a primitive VanDaminator
to secure the win! The crowd goes Apeshit and I realize that Mutoh
would probably be my favorite all-time wrestler if he wrestled like this
in every match. This was fucking great. I dunno. When
you think Mutoh you think a couple of things- lazy motherfucker who has
squandered too many chances to secure a place as one of the Greats; Great
technical wrestler who is one of the best in world when on those rare occasions
he is really fired up; Wrestler with a great gimmick that brought a whole
new idea of coolness to wrestling. What you NEVER think is: Keiji
Mutoh- Great Brawler. The seeds were here. He cultivated a
less satisfying garden when you see the overall fruit produced, I'd say.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
NEXT WEEK: HEAPING
CHUNKS OF DDT! CMLL JAPAN! MORE INTERNATIONAL INVASION STUFF!
POSSIBLY A NEW WRESTLER OF THE WEEK!
************************************************************
THE DEATH VALLEY PLAYBOYS.
seven fists in the face
of wrestling
*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^
I'm going to feel this way
until I'm six feet underground
Crazy as it sounds
I need you around
-the Smoking Popes
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